by Janet Lee
It was outside church that I first spoke at length with Charles Andrews. I had been working for the Missus for a good few years by that time. The white dress had grown short on me and showed some of my boot, but not in an improper way, and I wore my hair down and tied loosely with a white ribbon, and on Sundays I wore a rose in my hat. I thought myself very smart.
On that day the Missus was all in black, but wore a pink rose upon her dress. I think the Master was pleased to see some colour about her as he told her how beautiful she looked, in my hearing, which is not something men do, as a rule.
I was excited that day as there was to be a cricket match in town and there would be some folk there who had travelled a great distance, and there was to be cake and sweets and it would be a fine afternoon. I was in hope of seeing my parents. On that particular morning, Bert was excused from church as he was setting up a marquee for the cricket, and so when we left church the Master and Missus had paused only briefly at the angel above their baby’s grave.
Cook had hurried off to attend to her baking and I was standing outside the church, waiting to leave with the Master and Missus. Mr Andrews came up and stood beside me.
Good morning, Miss Louisa, he said. I said good morning to him, for I knew him to be Mr Andrews, the butcher, as I had been to his shop and made his acquaintance there, and I regularly saw him in church, although we had not spoken more than a good morning to each other. He held his hat in his hands and smiled at me.
Are you attending the cricket this afternoon? he asked and I said I was. He said, Then perhaps you may watch me bat, for I will be playing for the Merriwa team.
Just then I noticed the Missus and Master commencing their walk home, and I excused myself and wished him well with his batting.
The afternoon was busy with preparations for the cricket match and Cook fussing over her baking. We went down to the oval and Bert had set up the marquee so there would be shade and protection from the birds, because they do mess so, sir, if you sit under a tree in the country.
It was a large marquee and all the ladies were to sit under it and watch the game on the chairs which he had placed there; some of them were the chairs from the Missus’s kitchen and the dining chairs were there as well.
I was to keep the tea and cake up to the ladies, and to make sure they could enjoy watching the men run around. I was wearing a little apron over my white dress and a white cap on my head, and I had tied the cap on with ribbon and arranged a flower just so against my dark hair.
My father was to play cricket for the other team and so I was looking out for my mother and father, and for Mr Waldock upon the dray, and presently they came.
Now, I suppose my mother was tired from her journey for she did not seem as pleased to see me as I had hoped. She was busy with her little ones and immediately gave me my little brother to hold while she dealt with one of my sisters. He was a bonny thing, noisy and bouncy and happy to see me. But he was quite dusty from the journey and had very grubby fingers and so when he jumped on me I told him not to and held him a little distance from me lest he soil my dress.
My mother was cross and told me I was his sister and she did not matter how high and mighty I was, I should care for my brother. Or perhaps I was more interested in my new family, given that I had my photograph taken with them and they had so many fine things?
I tried to explain that I meant no offence, but that I needed to keep clean on account of working that afternoon serving tea, and she said that my employer should not be making me work on a Sunday, and we quarrelled. And, well, the moment was spoilt.
I stop talking to the chaplain here, because I am thinking back to that day, and it is as fresh in my mind as though it was yesterday, because my mother was very rarely cross, and because I had not seen her for some months.
She was probably just tired from the journey to town, Mrs Collins, the chaplain says, and he pats my hand as he speaks. What happened then?
Well, I went over to the tent, but I was sad that I had disappointed my mother. I had not seen her for some time and I had missed her and our reunion was not the one I had dreamt of. But as I served the tea, I thought how my boasting in letters and sending the photograph may have hurt my mother. Later, we made amends, but I found little joy in the day after that.
I watched the cricket without much interest, although my father batted well and scored some thirty runs, and Charles Andrews batted best for the Merriwa side. So when I later saw these two men chatting together, I assumed they were talking of cricket.
The letter from my mother came with Mr Waldock when he next visited.
I did not normally open my letters at the kitchen table, preferring to keep them and read them at night in my room. But I did read this one at the table and Mr Waldock, who was by now quite at home in Cook’s kitchen, was enjoying a cup of tea and some of her baking when I opened the letter.
My mother wrote to tell me that my father had given Mr Charles Andrews permission that I should marry him.
19.
I gave a little gasp as I read the letter and Cook asked what was the matter. When I told her, she asked if she might read the letter for herself as I surely had it wrong.
I showed her, in the hope that I had made a mistake.
I had not.
My mother said Mr Andrews had spoken to her and my father and it had been arranged. She said he was a good catch and it was an opportunity for me to have a business and a fine husband.
I did not know Mr Andrews hardly at all, apart from to say hello at church or in his shop. And I did not think of him as a possible husband so I did not understand these arrangements. I had not even thought of marriage, although I had begun to notice some of the young men in town, as by that time I was of an age to do so, and I suppose it was only natural.
I could not marry without my parents’ consent until I was twenty-one, and they were giving their consent to this marriage.
Cook said I should write to my parents and tell them I was unhappy with their plan for me, on account that I did not know Mr Andrews, apart from speaking to him once at church and purchasing sides of beef from him. I wanted to mention that he was an old man, but Cook thought this was not wise as a man in his thirties was not old and it might go in his favour, for he was an established businessman and not a wild, young boy.
Mr Waldock said he would deliver the letter that very day and I trusted him to do so as he knew all of my troubles, having been sitting in the kitchen when I opened my mail.
He said he would come to Merriwa again the next week, on the pretext of a need to purchase something at the store, for he was sure there would be something off his list that they would not have today – and he gave Cook a wink at this – and that he would be sure to tell my mother that he could carry another letter back to me.
I thanked him very much and, all working together, we very carefully worded a letter to my parents.
Cook said she was sure the letter would do the trick. We should talk no more of it and we should be sure not to tell the Missus for she would worry about losing her little Louisa and then it would not happen and all her worry would have been for naught.
It was a long week that week, sir, I do remember.
I polished the silver teapot and milk jug and sugar bowl and dusted the table and chiffonier carefully, all the while thinking this might be one of the last times I would do such a thing for surely if I was to be married I would never have these pretty things again.
I begged off going to church that Sunday, saying I was feeling poorly, and the Missus said she had noticed that I was pale and silent that week and would I like her to fetch the doctor. I said no, thank you, I hoped it would pass, and that if it did not, I would get Cook to make one of her poultices.
When Cook came back, she said she seen Mr Andrews in church but she had not spoken to him, and I hoped in my heart of hearts he might have gone off the thought of
marrying me.
When Thursday next came around, I was like a cat walking upon prickles, for I checked the road every minute of the morning, waiting for Mr Waldock and his dray.
He did not come until later in the afternoon, and he brought a letter from my mother, as he said he would.
She wrote that she and my father had read the letter, and they were sorry that getting married would make me unhappy, but that my father had given his word and I would have to marry Mr Andrews. My mother wrote that I should marry Charles Andrews because he was a good man and well set up and I would not do better. I ought to remember my station and if I left myself too long, I would spoil and then no one would have me.
Which I did not understand at the time, but now take to mean that I was better to marry a man of good character and prospects than to sit upon the shelf.
I cried to Cook that I should go and ask Mr Andrews not to have me, and she said I could not do that for then it would be gossip as to why.
I could not see that I had any other choice but to obey my parents and so I made plans to marry Charles Andrews.
The Botany Murder Case
Marriage Certificate
On August 28, 1865, Louisa Hall, spinster, a domestic servant, residing at Merriwa, was married to Charles Andrews, a bachelor, following the occupation of a butcher in the same district. The marriage ceremony was performed at the Church of England, Merriwa, by the Rev. William S. Wilson. The witnesses to the ceremony are given as Wm. Munro and Lucy Munro.
Andrews was a man of exemplary character, and is described as a very hard worker. He was a sober, honest, good-hearted, simple-minded man, and earned for himself the respect and esteem of all who knew him.
Evening News13
20.
I wore the white dress which I had worn in the photograph and to the cricket. The dress I had loved so much previous, but loved no more after that.
I spent the morning before the wedding packing my bag in my room. I looked around at the small table beside my bed and the window with its curtain and I was sorry to be going. I left my bag on the bed as Bert would bring it later to the butcher shop, and I walked down to the kitchen with a heavy heart. Cook said the Missus wanted to see me and so I went into the parlour and the Missus said I should leave down the front steps on the occasion of my wedding. She said that she would not know what to do without me, and gave me some roses to carry and oh they were such a lovely shade of pink, and she placed three roses in my hair, which I had tied up with the ribbon that had the bluebirds on it, although I probably shouldn’t have, as it was given to me by Harry.
Now, I knew those roses she gave me to carry were the bunch she’d usually put on her baby’s grave and that was a grand gesture for her. And I thought it nice that I wore three pink roses in my hair. I had three pink roses beside my bed on my first day in Merriwa, and the Missus gave me these on my wedding day because she remembered that, or so I have always liked to think, sir.
I did not have my father give me away as he could not be spared from his work and my mother was planning to come, but the children were sick with bad colds, and she could not travel with them. She had sent me a letter and she said she was pleased that I was marrying Charles as he was a reliable man who would take care of me. She said she would be up to see me when I was settled in my new home and she did come to visit, and I was glad of the later visit, sir, for by then I had the opportunity to make some changes to the butcher shop and the cottage, but I will come to that directly.
I had some notion of staying longer in that lovely house and being with the Missus on account we had formed some sort of a family, as such. And I know as women are supposed to marry and have children, but I was not ready, and I wondered what life lay ahead of me. There was the Missus, lost and sad with no children, spending all her time with a grave, and there was my mother, worn down by years of work and so many children. And in many ways I do see my mother was right to want me to marry Charles in as much as he was a steady man, although I would have liked him to be a little less reliable and to have more of an appetite for fun. I did not find him very interesting on account of him being so old and there being no excitement. But then I suppose a long marriage is meant to be a long time of sameness, isn’t it?
Bert was to bring down my bag and some wedding presents besides, as they had been given to Charles and me before the wedding as was the custom then, although this does not seem to be followed so much now, sir. The Missus gave me a very handsome teapot, not a silver one, of course, but a good solid cast-iron one, which you may place upon the hook above the fire. I have this teapot still and use it every day, well, up until the present, you will understand. And she gave me the quilt which had lain on my bed, with the pinks and roses that I loved so, for she said she would never be able to look upon it without thinking of me, and it should stay mine wherever I went, but it is gone now, after so much moving and all the children. And she gave me a linen handkerchief, which she had embroidered herself with the initials L. A. for Louisa Andrews. And I used that handkerchief, even after my marriage to Mr Collins, even though the initials are now wrong. The handkerchief is a good strong linen.
Cook gave me a pudding wrapped in calico, and a frying pan, and the frying pan I would never part with, for it is one of the pans which also has a lid, and may be used as a pan or a pot. When I opened it, she had written out some of her recipes and placed them inside, and I cherished these, sir, for a good cook does not easily give away her recipes.
Bert had potted up some herbs and said he would be sure to bring them with him to the shop when we were settled and help me to plant them, and he gave me a digging fork, on account of him being a gardener.
I walked out to my wedding from the home of the Master and Missus, and I went out the front door, as the Missus said I may, and she stood there on the step to wave me off. Cook walked alongside me to the church, and she had on her Sunday best and her hat, and she had pinned a rose to her collar for the occasion.
Even in that short walk, I was not happy and there were many times when I would have liked to run down the street and away from my fate. And I thought of all the times I seen the Missus and Master taking that same walk from their home after their lunch, but dressed in black, and her carrying roses for their baby’s grave.
I thought my face must have looked as sad as hers did when she walked to the church.
When I got to the altar, Mr Andrews and I were facing each other and I took a proper look at the man who was to be my husband, for I had not had much to do with him until we married. Mr Andrews was much older than me, though I believe he was no more than thirty-three, which is not old when you get there, sir, but I was a young girl at the time and he seemed very old.
He had a ruddiness to his complexion from days spent in the sun. He was taller than I was, although not so very tall for a man. He had strong arms and a strong back, which he had used to good advantage with the cricket bat and in his butchering. He was wearing his Sunday suit and I own he did look very smart, handsome, I would say, and neat and tidy, with his hair brushed all smooth. But even as we stood taking our vows, there was an odour about him – a meaty smell which was not pleasant.
I came to understand that no matter how long he stood and scrubbed – and I will say this for him, he was a clean man – there was always that smell about him and I took it upon myself that it was the smell from his being a butcher. I have heard of those who work in the coal pits and they have coal in their skin until the day they die, and they say there was a man in Parramatta who coughed up great lumps of black that could have been coal right out of his chest, years after he had worked in a coal mine. Well, I thought it was like that for Charles, being a butcher, it was as though the butchering had seeped to his very bones. But I really only noticed that smell in the first few days of our marriage, because I soon began to smell that way myself.
And these are not thoughts a bride should have on her w
edding day.
I had wanted to have Cook as my witness, but Mr Andrews had brought two particular friends along to be witnesses, the Munroes, and so it was them and Cook who were with us and the minister in the church.
After the service, I parted from Cook and there were tears, for we had become great friends and we both knew this would now change, no matter how we pretended it might not, and then I walked with my husband to my new home. And even though it was not far away from where I had been living, it seemed as though it was the other side of the world.
My new home would be the cottage behind the butcher shop, although I discovered on the first day that the cottage was not its own building, but was separated by just a door from where the customers bought their beef and mutton.
The shop sat on a long block of land and there was a cattle yard at the back and a section where Mr Andrews would do the killing and hanging of the beasts. His horse, King, who was only a young horse at the time, was stabled in a little shed there and Charles used King to pull the cart for his deliveries, and also later when he was a carrier. I did feel sorry for King though, as his stable faced the yard, and he would watch all the killing which went on there and smell all the blood that was in the dirt. Horses can smell so much better than we can, sir, and I could smell it bad enough.
The cottage at that time was not much more than one room, although it did have a timber floor and I was grateful for that, for I had been spoilt with the timber floors at the Missus’s house and would have hated to have gone back to a dirt floor.
There was a separate kitchen out near the cattle yard, and a well with a bucket, and a privy near the slaughter area. In the cottage there was a rope bed, with a blanket for a mattress and a few stumps about, which Mr Andrews said served as chairs and tables.
Mr Andrews looked about him and said he was sorry it was not grander, but that he had been used to living on his own and would be grateful if I could give advice for improvements.