by Lund, S. E.
"I think I'll join you," he said and turned to Claire. "Are you coming as well?"
She shook her head. "I'm too tired. I think I'll stay here and listen to the stories. You two go ahead and enjoy yourselves."
Claire smiled at me and I wondered what she thought of me going off with Sefton. If she disapproved, she said nothing nor did her expression speak of disapproval.
Before we left on the bus, I texted Drake, glad that one of the luxuries of the camp was cell phone coverage.
Hi there. Had a great day drawing elephants – can you believe it? I'm really enjoying myself, and now we're going out to do some star gazing. Sefton is no problem and the only thing that would make this perfect would be if you were here to enjoy it with me. I can't wait for us to go on safari together some weekend when you have time off.
I watched and sure enough, he'd received my text. The three dots showed he was writing back, and I smiled as I waited for his response.
That's great! I can't wait either. I'm so glad you're having a good time. I was worried that Mr. deVilliers would be pestering you and would ruin things. So glad things are good on that front.
I texted right back.
They are good. I'm not going to let him ruin things for me. How are things at work?
After a moment, he responded.
Hectic, as usual. Typical Friday night in Nairobi, shootings, stabbings, collisions, beatings. There is no risk that I'll be out of a job any time soon, sadly! Looks like I'll be up late tonight as we have a couple of trauma patients who will need emergency surgery. Wish I was looking at stars instead of patient charts…
I smiled.
I'm sure you love what you're doing. Tell me the truth – you love having to cut into someone's brain and fix things. :)
He responded right away.
You got me. It's a privilege to be working here, somewhere that I’m needed. But I miss you, Ms. Bennet.
That made my heart swell.
I miss you, too. Have to go now as our bus is leaving. I wish you were here… I love you.
His response sent a jolt of desire through my body.
I love you, too. How I miss you in my bed so I could touch you, kiss you…
I put my cell phone away and joined the others on the bus.
The trip to the observatory was short, and I was a bit apprehensive about going out in the middle of the African savannah at night, but I reasoned that this was done every safari and the guides were experts at what they did. I expected that I'd see glowing eyes in the distance as lions and other predators stalked us, but was too busy watching the guides set up the telescopes and the astrophotographers set up their tripods and cameras to worry too much. Sefton stood and spoke with one man who was talking about taking photos of the Milky Way while I watched a guide point the telescope to see the planet Jupiter.
The evening passed quickly, and we all got a chance to see the planet, even the giant red spot and I was glad that I decided to go, even though Sefton was there. He left me alone, spending his time with one of the other travelers who had a camera and was doing time-lapse photography.
We trundled back into the bus and made our way back to camp, arriving before midnight. Claire was already in bed, her bed covered in a mosquito net. I washed my face and brushed my teeth and then crept into bed, pulling the mosquito net around me. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.
The next morning, I woke to the sounds of Claire in the washroom showering. I yawned and stretched, then lay on my back, my eyes adjusting to the light. I felt pretty good, despite the strange bed and sleeping alone.
Claire and I dressed and went to the dining tent for breakfast before we spent the day with separate groups again. This time, our small group went to another location and spent time watching and drawing giraffes, having found a small family group with a young calf. I used Sefton's binoculars to look at the baby, trying to decide what would be considered 'art' versus plain mimicry, Sefton's words to me from the previous day playing on my mind.
Instead of trying to do a large picture, I decided to do some small studies so I could concentrate on the details of the giraffe's anatomy – the eye, the snout, the ear, the stumps that I took for horns. Small sketches so I could figure out the detail. I wouldn't try to do a full drawing that day, preferring to spend my time practicing. I'd focus on the elephant picture when I got back to Nairobi.
On his part, Sefton spent his time talking with his students. I listened in now and then as he told them about his career and about his own path to being an artist. I thought he was a bit pompous, but he was merely answering questions, not volunteering the information. Plus, he had every right to be proud of his accomplishments. We paused for a meal, the guides bringing out tables and folding chairs and even white tablecloths.
Sefton left me alone for most of the day, and I spent it pretty much in solitude. I wondered why he seemed to ignore me, but he did, and didn’t once come over to see what I was working on. It wasn’t that I wanted his attention. I was pretty much on my own all day, left to myself. The other students talked to Sefton or focused on their work and so I did as well.
In the middle of the afternoon, we moved to another location when the giraffes moved out of the shade and to a watering hole. We followed them and set up beside the small lake to see the animals that congregated there for water. There were wildebeests, giraffes and antelope. Apparently, there were crocs in the lake so the animals had to be on the lookout.
I sent Drake a text, suspecting it wouldn’t be sent until I returned to base camp.
I miss you. I drew giraffes this morning, and now we're looking at wildebeests at a watering hole. We ate our lunch at a folding table on the savannah with white tablecloth and china. I feel a bit like a member of the British Raj in Colonial Kenya. I wish so much you were here with me…
There was no indication that the text had been read and no sign of a pending reply so I returned to my drawings and worked until the sun started to fall behind the hills in the distance. Finally, it was time to leave for the day. I was very hot and very dry and sunburnt, despite the sunscreen we slathered on, my face hot, cheeks flushed. I was glad to get back to base camp and a shower before dinner.
Claire was already back and was ready for the dining room, having changed into a colorful tunic and pants with a leopard pattern, so she went ahead of me. I'd join her when I was dressed, choosing a white blouse and matching trousers so that every inch of me was covered up – especially my back and shoulder.
On my way to the dining tent, I met up with Sefton, who had himself apparently had a shower, for his long fair hair was still damp. He was wearing a white shirt and cargo pants and his skin was burnt like mine.
"How was your day?" he said as he fell in beside me as I walked to the dining tent. "Are you enjoying your safari so far?"
I nodded. "So far, so good," I said. "I'm hot, tired and hungry though."
We sat with Claire and a few of the other travelers, and I was only too happy to drink a glass of white wine before our dinner was served. Sefton and Claire talked about South Africa, about politics there. Sefton was thoughtful and reasonable, betraying my view of him as an arrogant jerk. I kept quiet, missing Drake very much, wishing he were here with me. The meal was served shortly after the wine was poured and it was very good – roasted game with root vegetables and fresh chapattis. Claire became quite boisterous, downing several glasses of wine. She showed us all her photographs on her digital camera, and we all ooh'd and ahh'd over them.
After a full day on the savannah, I couldn't wait to get to bed. I decided against going out to the observatory for a second night and instead, went back to my bed and called Drake on my cell phone.
His cell went directly to voice mail and I saw there were no text messages from him and so I felt quite sad, and a bit lonely. He must have been very busy with calls in the ER. I went out to the tiny patio outside our tent and watched the night sky. We faced the savannah and the view of the sky was magnificent. Onc
e more, I felt so lonely, missing Drake, wishing he had been able to come.
Before I turned to go back inside my tent, I saw Sefton walk up, his hands in his pockets.
"Well, Ms. McDermott, how are you this lovely evening?"
I forced a smile, a little startled that he'd snuck up on me like that. "I'm exhausted after a day spent in the heat."
"I find I sleep really well out here," he said, not getting the hint. "The air is so fresh, and it's so quiet."
"It is."
We stood in silence and watched the sky.
"Too bad your… man… wasn't here but I guess he has more important things to do back in Nairobi." I could smell the wine on him and his words sounded a bit slurred.
"Yes, and he does have something important to do this weekend. He's on call in the ER."
"Very important," Sefton said, a hint of humor in his voice.
"It is important."
"More important than experiencing this?" Sefton pointed to the vista with a sweep of his arm. "More important than you?"
"We both have our own lives."
"Of course. Too bad your lives are so different and so separate. What do you do – catch each other on the way to and from work? Not much of a relationship."
My entire body stiffened. I couldn't believe he said that to me…
"You have a lot of nerve saying things like that to me."
"Why do you say that? I'm merely making an observation. Maybe you don't mind being separated from him all the time. But seriously, you and I have spent more time together this weekend than you and he have probably all week. Am I right?"
"Excuse me," I said and went inside my tent, closing the flap in his face.
"The truth hurts, doesn't it?" he said from outside the tent door. "You have to decide, Kate, if this is the kind of relationship you want to have for the rest of your life." He came inside the tent and I turned, angered that he had the nerve to follow me.
"Please leave," I said, alarm filling me.
"If you were mine," Sefton said, "we'd spend all our time together. We'd be 24/7, because I suspect that’s what you really want and need." Then he grabbed me by the shoulders, pulling me against him. "If you were mine…"
I struggled to escape him, but his grip was hard, bordering on painful.
"Sefton, please…"
Then the tent flap opened and Claire poked her head inside.
"Oh," she said, ducking her head out. "So sorry…"
"No, Claire," I said, calling after her. "Come back please! It's not what you think." But she was gone, and I was left with Sefton, who still held onto me.
"Do I have to scream?" I said, holding his gaze.
He blinked a few times, as if deciding if he would push.
"Do I have to beg?" he said, his voice low.
"Begging wouldn't help. Please leave me now before you do something you'll regret."
He exhaled loudly and then released my arms. "If you change your mind, my tent is three doors down."
"I won't change my mind."
"I'll wait for you. If not tonight, some other night when you realize you're not meant for him."
I shook my head, not understanding how a man could get it all so wrong. He was drunk, but he was also delusional if he really thought I was meant for him.
Finally, he left me alone in the tent.
I sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, my knees shaking from adrenaline. I feared that if Claire hadn’t interrupted, he would have pushed even harder and I would have had to scream.
What the hell did he think he was doing?
I took out my cell and checked once more to see if Drake had texted me.
He had:
Sorry I didn’t respond to your text but I was in a long very complicated surgery and then had to scrub in on another right away due to an industrial accident after a crane collapsed at a construction site. Several serious injuries. I'm exhausted and am crashing at the hospital. Hope you're enjoying yourself. I miss you.
I smiled.
I miss you so much. Sefton has been an asshole again. I wish you were here…
He texted right back.
I wish I was there to defend your honor, Ms. Bennet. I'd like to punch him in the face. If he persists, please talk to the tour guide and tell them he's harassing you. Give me the phone number and I'll call if you need me to.
Then, I felt bad, like a teenage girl who couldn’t defend herself.
I'll ignore him. Don’t worry about me. Sorry I mentioned it. I’ll see you tomorrow when you get home from work. I love you.
I signed off after he texted back that he loved me too. I lay down on the bed, the mosquito curtains pulled around me, the sounds of laughter coming from the dining tent where the other travelers were having a late-night party.
Claire was going to be a problem. She had to have misinterpreted what she saw. I wanted to go to the dining tent and tell her what happened, but I didn’t want to make a scene.
While I waited for her to return to the tent, I decided to take a quick shower, hoping to wash away my tension from the encounter with Sefton that almost went bad.
Then, I lay on my bed again, the mosquito tent around me, reading on my Kindle. I looked at my hand. It was still shaking.
Finally, well after midnight, Claire returned to the tent.
"Are you alone?" she said, searching around the tent as if expecting to find Sefton there.
I turned the light on beside the bed. "Of course, I'm alone. What you saw was Sefton being entirely inappropriate."
"What do you mean?" she said and half-stumbled over to her bed. She was drunk. "I know what I saw."
"No, you don't. You saw Sefton getting the wrong idea about his chances with me. I set him straight and he left."
"You both left the dining tent at the same time. Then, I saw you alone with him in your tent, and in his arms," she said, her face red. "That's what I saw. It speaks for itself. How could you do that to Drake? Why come all the way here only to take up with another man?"
"I didn't, I haven't! You don’t understand…"
"I understand well enough. What will Drake think about you being alone with Sefton in your tent late at night?"
" You've misunderstood—"
"If you won't tell Drake the truth, I will," she said and gathered up her things. "I'm going to see if there's another tent I can sleep in tonight."
"Claire!" I said, but she grabbed her bag and left, the tent flap closing noisily behind her.
I went to the flap and opened it, watching as she walked down the pathway to the main tent, where people still were partying.
Now what the hell was I to do?
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
I sent Drake a text.
Drake, something happened with Sefton and Claire completely misunderstood. Please, if you hear from her, don't believe what she says to you. Sefton came to my tent when I was here alone and grabbed me. He's under some delusion that I'm meant for him, but I sent him away. Unfortunately, Claire came in when he was holding my arms, and she misinterpreted everything. Now, she's sleeping somewhere else, angry at me because she thinks I've cheated on you. I haven't. You know I can barely tolerate Sefton.
Please answer me as soon as you get this. Please call me…
I didn't receive a text, and figured he must be asleep so I lay down on my bed and fretted until nearly three in the morning.
When I woke, there was barely any time to get ready before our last trip to sketch wildlife. The small group of artists took a trip to sketch lions. I spent my time alone again and had no idea where Claire was. Sefton kept his distance, barely even glancing my way.
I was miserable because of what happened and the fact that Drake hadn’t texted me back or called. I was honestly too nervous to do much drawing despite the guard's assurances that we were safe as long as we stayed on top of the vehicles.
Despite everything, I tried to get something out of the ruined day. I spent my time drawing the male lion with scars on h
is face. The guide told us that meant he was an old male, and the scars on his face meant he was probably on his way out of the pride with only a few years left as its leader. I drew the scars, focusing in on his face, with the scar running down from his eye to his jaw. I tried to capture the look of fatigue on his face, as if he was tired of having to defend his position as top male. Sefton ignored me, as he had on previous excursions, so I was left with my own thoughts.
We returned to base camp at noon, had a nice meal in the dining tent, where I sat by myself, Sefton not even looking at me, while Claire glared at me from across the tent, and the rest of the time glared at Sefton. Finally, we packed up our things. I went to Claire before the bus left, deciding to confront her and try to set things straight.
She didn’t want to talk to me.
"Claire," I said. "Sefton had too much to drink and made an unwanted advance at me. I was ready to scream when you came in the tent so thank you. Nothing happened. I have no interest in him, but Sefton has an inappropriate interest in me."
"That's your story," she said, and shook her head. "Not Sefton's. All I know is what I saw with my own eyes. I knew you were wrong for Drake the moment Michael told me about you. You’re far too young and you have no idea what it’s like to be married to a surgeon. I don't know why Drake's with you other than you indulge his," she said and looked away, as if she couldn’t stand to look at me. "His peculiarities. They're dangerous and could get him into so much trouble. Ruin him." She glanced back at me, her expression accusing. "I'm glad at least we found out about you before you married him."