He nodded his head to Danny and asked, “What do you say?”
“ Okay.” Danny blushed when it had become obvious he was checking him out.
Chuck stood behind Danny and positioned the stick for him. Goosebumps covered Danny’s arms when the imposing man began whispering in his ear. “There you go, take your time to get the angle just right, easy... relax... steady, and shoot straight."
It was hard to stay steady with the man breathing down his neck. Danny’s tongue slipped out the corner of his mouth to help him concentrate. He reached out across the table, and made his shot.
“ Thata' boy!” Chuck exclaimed, with a slap to Danny's backside, when the ball he was aiming for dropped in the corner pocket.
Danny flushed and became instantly aroused.
“ Let's see you make this other shot over here,” he said encouragingly. Chuck hovered over him then leaned in closer. Danny could feel Chuck's arousal pressed against him as he stroked his stick, and slid his hand up his arm. Danny blushed but remained focused. He knew he was in over his head, but he liked the attention he was getting, and the feel of the man caressing his arm. Danny shot and pocketed another ball. Proud of himself he stood up and smiled triumphantly. Chuck high fived him, and Danny took another swig of his beer. Realizing it was empty, Chuck handed him a cup he had filled from a pitcher. Danny took a sip, and the foam from the dark lager left a white mustache over his lip. Chuck wiped it off with his finger before sucking it clean.
“ Nice,” he said.
Danny stood unaware that his mouth was slightly opened. Chuck chuckled, and Danny snapped his mouth shut. He turned back around to the pool table to hide his red face. Chuck wasted no time in leaning back over Danny. This time he caressed his large hand down his back and over Danny's backside. Danny purposely sunk the eight ball.
“ Sorry,” he said.
“ Good game, guys,” Ethan said, as he took Danny's hand. “I should get you home.”
“ So soon?” Chuck asked.
“ I'm sure we'll be back,” Ethan reassured.
Danny gave a quick wave as Ethan pulled him away.
Heading out towards the exit, Danny heard someone say, “Don't I know you from somewhere?”
It took him a moment to recognize it was the same man who came to his house the other day for Ricky. Before he had a chance to say anything, Ethan pushed him out the door.
“ Danny, why don't you move in with me?” Ethan asked, during the drive home. He was frustrated that he was once again rushing to get Danny back. “Then we wouldn't have to always be worrying about the time.”
“ I'm not worried about the time.”
“ Maybe you're not, but I'm not taking any chances with Mitch. You saw the look he gave me when we left your house.”
“ You don't have anything to worry about. Mitch and Antonio like you.”
“ At least someone does.”
“ What's that suppose to mean?”
“ We've been going out for weeks, and you haven't let me get past second base.”
“ What exactly is second base?”
“ You know what I mean. As soon as things start to heat up, it's time to take you home.”
“ I’m not ready for a relationship,” Danny was forced to confess.
“ How about sex then?” Ethan half joked.
“ Sorry, but I don't fuck friends.”
“ All this time, and you only wanted to be friends?”
Danny sighed and admitted, “No, not at first.” He didn't really know what he wanted, but every time Ethan tried to take things further it didn't feel right.
“ Are you saying now that we're friends you no longer like me?”
“ I do like you, Ethan. Only, need a friend more right now.”
“ I don't understand. You'd rather fuck a stranger? One of those sleazy men who keep hitting on you?”
“ I don't care about them, or what they think of me.”
“ That makes them okay to have sex with? Why not me?”
“ I don't do relationships well. I always fuck them up.”
“ You're only seventeen. How many relationships could you have possibly been in?”
“ Please, Ethan, I can really use a friend now.”
Ethan was disappointed, but the expression on Danny's face told him his comment was not made lightly.
“ If that's what you want,” he relinquished with a sigh.
“ It's what I want.”
“ My roommate's moving out soon. You could still move in if you like.”
“ Thanks, I'll think about it.”
*****
Danny wasn't going to bother telling Ricky about meeting his friend, but they happened to be alone together in the kitchen, and not speaking felt awkward.
“ Some guy came by the other day asking for you.”
“ Oh yeah? Who was it?”
“ No idea. I didn't ask. He said he'd try to stop by again before he leaves town.”
Ricky was curious about who it could be. His mind began to whirl on the possibilities, until he was distracted by a familiar bar stamp he spotted on the back of Danny's hand when he opened the refrigerator door.
It finally registered where he had seen it. “Danny, you're going to get a spanking if Mitch or Antonio see that stamp on your hand.”
Danny noticed he still had the stamp. He wasn't sure why he didn't try harder to wash it off. If he were honest with himself, he'd realize he was seeking a reaction.
“ Are you going to say anything?”
Ricky did not like the idea of Danny going to such an unsavory place, but he couldn't stomach the thought of the boy being any angrier with him.
“ I don't like to keep secrets. If I'm asked directly, I won't lie.”
“ Fine, whatever.”
“ You really should be more careful about the places you go.”
“ You really should butt out.”
“ Sorry, kid...”
“ Don't call me kid.”
Ricky frowned. Danny was not going to make this easy for him. “I'm little worried about the choices you're making,” he continued delicately.
“ Don't be. I have more than enough mother hens. I don't need you telling me what to do.”
Ricky was hurt, but didn't press the issue. His relationship with Danny had suffered greatly since he decided to stay on as a partner. He couldn't blame him for his resentment, but it pained him to know he was the cause of it. He never meant for Danny to feel replaced. It was the first truly selfish decision Ricky ever made. It was something he did just because he wanted it, and he failed to consider the impact it would have on Danny. Afterwards, he thought about leaving until Danny was ready to accept him, but it was too late. The damage was done. He was afraid he would never be the same in Danny's eyes again. Even worse, he seemed to have somehow tainted the relationship Danny had with the others. If he could take it all back he would. Danny was still a kid, and needed them more than he did.
*****
Mitch didn't fully grasp the turmoil Danny was in, and assumed it had more to do with typical adolescent angst. He was attempting to address his sudden lack of respect for authority by reminding Danny who was in charge. Regrettably, most of his attempts backfired as Danny became increasingly more defiant. Danny left the house one day without permission, and as promised, Mitch brought him into the office to be paddled. Seeing Danny bent emotionless over the discipline chair, Mitch stopped half way through the punishment. He knew he wasn't reaching Danny, and wasn't willing to hurt him trying.
Mitch began to doubt his approach. Antonio
suggested that they give him more space. They backed off on some of the rules and consequences. However, the conflicting messages and lack of structure confused him. Nothing seemed to work with Danny. He refused to see his therapist, and the therapist wouldn't agree to see him under duress. Ironically, Danny felt abandoned by the freedom he was given. It was a no win situation for everybody.
*****
To escape the friction in the house, Danny began asking Ethan to take him out more often. One particular Friday night, they went back to a local pub. Danny felt more comfortable there, and wanted to relax with a beer and a game of darts. He bought the beers this time. The bartender had warmed up to Danny. Like many of the others who frequented the place, he was amused by his innocent charm. He was young, but never caused any problems. He left at a reasonable hour, and never became too intoxicated. So, he dropped the pretense of looking the other way when he knew men were buying him drinks. Danny felt mature when he picked up the tab for his friends. He left a generous tip on the bar. Carrying two pitchers over to the table by the dartboard, Danny noticed a familiar face eyeing him.
“ I've seen that guy before. He came to my house looking for Ricky, and then he asked me out,” Danny whispered to Ethan.
“ Who is he?”
Danny shrugged. "He never told me his name.”
“ That's odd.”
“ I guess. He's been staring at me since we got here.”
“ He looks rather scary.”
“ You think so?”
“ He's not staring so much as leering. I'd stay away from him if I was you.”
Danny took one more glance back before going up to play darts. He was having fun with Ethan and a group of men they had become friendly with. His best friend growing up had a dartboard in his room, and they used to play for hours. It didn’t take Danny long before he was impressing the older men and winning bets.
“ Pay up,” he gloated, as he hit his double.
“ It's almost worth it to be taken by a little con artist when you flash those adorable dimples,” said his good-natured opponent.
Danny had heard similar comments before, and was learning how to use it to his advantage.
“ How about we make it double or nothing?”
Danny shrugged and said, “I like to get paid in large bills.”
“ Now you're getting cocky.”
Danny was about to make a smart reply when he felt someone hovering behind him. He tensed up as Brendan pulled him against his body by his waist. He reached his free arm along the outside of Danny's outstretched arm that was poised for his target. Brendan wrapped his hand around Danny's and said, “You need to relax if want to hit your mark.”
Danny wanted to tell him that he was doing fine before he’d creeped up on him. But, he was being held with such strength and intensity, that he went rigid and lost his voice. He had no choice but to allow the much bigger man to flick back his wrist. The dart was released without aim. It didn't hit the mark, but it came surprisingly close.
“ Not bad for a beginner.”
It didn't matter how hard Danny tried to twist free, the strong arms wouldn't let go.
“ Let's try that again with a little distraction and see how well you do.” Brendan rubbed his hand up and down Danny's thigh, eventually resting it close to his groin.
“ Hey, leave the kid alone, we've got money on this game!” said one of the usual patrons, hoping the muscle head would back off.
“ Do you?" Brendan asked, seductively in Danny's ear. “Didn't your mama tell you it's not a good idea to gamble? A little boy like you could get himself in a lot of trouble.”
“ I can handle myself. Why don't you step back and I'll show you?”
“ Tough guy, huh?” he laughed condescendingly.
Powerless to squirm out of his grasp, Danny tried to shove him away, but he wouldn't budge. Brendan grabbed Danny by the collar and lifted him up on his toes. A half dozen men came crowding over to Danny's defense. Brendan backed down. Acting cool, he smacked Danny on the bottom and said, “I didn't mean to get your tail feathers all riled up.”
“ Finish this game, Danny and I'll take you home. It's getting late,” Ethan said, looking for an excuse to get Danny away from the creepy man.
“ Who's this? Your babysitter?”
Danny was starting to have fun before Brendan came over, and he resented Ethan taking control. “Why don't you go on without me? I'll get a ride back when I'm done,” Danny said.
“ Sorry, but I promised Mitch I'd have you back after the movie.”
“ What are you talking about? We didn't go to a movie.”
“ That's right. And if we're not back in twenty minutes he's going to find out.”
“ I'll take you home,” Brendan offered.
Danny smiled. “See, I can get a ride.”
“ Either you come home with me or I'm going to call Mitch to pick you up,” Ethan said, as he grabbed his jacket.
“ Wait up!” Danny yelled, chasing after him.
*****
Mitch was waiting in his office when he heard Danny come in. He followed him up to his room. “Where did you go tonight?”
“ Out with Ethan. Antonio said I could.”
“ It's late. Where've you been?”
“ To a midnight show.”
“ Why couldn't you make an earlier movie?”
“ It's the weekend, Mitch. I'm not going to turn into a pumpkin.”
“ Don't get smart with me, and why do I smell smoke on your clothes?”
“ Ethan's trying to give it up.”
“ Is that alcohol on your breath?”
“ No.”
“ What was the movie about?”
“ Sex and violence.”
“ I see, was there a plot?”
“ If there was, I wasn't paying attention. Ethan had his tongue down my throat during most of it.” Danny was hoping to end Mitch’s interrogation, and succeeded in flustering him, as well.
“ Danny, if I find out you have been less than honest there will be consequences to pay,” he muttered, before walking out of his room.
Danny smirked at the door Mitch shut behind him. He then climbed into bed too lazy to change. He felt no peace from his hollow victory. Realizing sleep wasn't going to come tonight, Danny got out of bed and crept quietly to the room adjacent to his. It was a perfect blend of TJ and Ricky. Against one wall were TJ's scuba gear and old surfboards; the other housed Ricky's large cello and musical equipment. The closet was filled with a mixture of their clothes. Danny used to find comfort in this room. Only a few months ago he had sat on the bed and shared things with Ricky he had never talked about. Almost a year prior, he had laid here in TJ's arms protected against bad dreams. Today, there was no solace in this room for him. A cold chill ran through his body. He searched the drawers of the dresser for an old hooded sweatshirt. It was faded. The bright blue was now a dreary grey. The threads were warn, the hems were frayed, but it still smelled of TJ. Danny hugged the sweatshirt and breathed in his scent before pulling it over his head. On his way out the door he stopped in front of the master bedroom. It was late, but Danny could hear faint murmurs and moaning. They were all awake, but too preoccupied to notice or even care if Danny left the house.
*****
Danny walked aimlessly before hopping on a bus, and then he took the subway east. The night air was chilly as he wandered the streets for a place to sit. After being propositioned by prostitutes, Johns, and drug dealers, he entered the first bar that didn’t card him.
“ What are you doing here solo, kid?”
Danny forced a smile and said, “Hi,
Chuck.”
“ It's a bit late don't you think?”
“ You're here.”
“ It's been a while since I had a curfew.”
“ What makes you think I have curfew?”
“ Well, if you don't, you should. You shouldn't be out here alone this time of night.”
“ Why? What could happen?”
“ It's best you don't find out. You should head home.”
Danny walked away mumbling, “I don't need that shit. I came out to avoid it.”
“ Well, well, well, if it isn't Danny, and without his babysitter.”
“ Fuck off! I don't need your shit either.”
“ Oh, don't be like that. I'm only fooling with ya'. Let me buy you a drink.”
Danny walked over to the bar deciding to accept Brendan's offer. He didn't exactly like the muscle head, but he liked the attention, and Danny was feeling reckless. Within the hour, Danny had a few drinks in him, and was beginning to flirt with the men seated around the bar.
An older man pulled a bar stool up close to Danny, and began playing with the strings of his hoodie. Danny's head was buzzing with too much alcohol. He wondered what it would be like to kiss him, and didn't pull away when the man planted his wet messy lips on his mouth. Danny felt slightly nauseous. He shoved the persistent man away to hop off the barstool.
“ Hey, hey, not so fast,” Brendan said, wedging himself between them. “The boy's with me.” Used to getting anybody he wanted, he pulled Danny tight against his body. He'd be damned if he let the kid slip between his fingers this time.
“ I'm not with anybody. Let me go!” Danny shouted.
“ Hold on, Danny, calm down,” Brendan said, not wanting to create a scene, but unwilling to relinquish his hold just yet.
“ I don't feel very good. I wanna go,” Danny pleaded.
“ You heard him,” Chuck said.
Bringing Home Danny Page 30