Ready to go, she began to tidy her apartment. Sutter was picking her up tonight, so she wouldn’t have her own car. The plan was to go back to the Knightlinger house after dinner so she could help the colonel with the nighttime routine, then he would have to take her home. When that happened, Kinsey had every intention of inviting him in for a nightcap.
So she stashed laundry in the closet and cleared the bathroom counter of creams, lotions, comb, brush and makeup. And as she worked, she recalled her earlier conversation with the colonel about Sutter.
She had honestly never even considered attempting to change his mind about his refusal to marry. Like with her brothers, like with Trevor, she accepted that their minds were made up, that she had no control over the decisions they made, and could only make her own decisions accordingly.
When it came to her brothers, that had meant doing whatever had to be done stateside and making the decision not to dwell on the sacrifices. Not to be bitter or resentful. To view it as serving not only her family, but serving her country, too, by freeing her brothers for their military service.
When it came to Trevor, it had meant ending their engagement and a relationship with a man she’d cared about and had envisioned a future with. It had meant deciding that since she couldn’t have the life she wanted with him, she would need to go on searching for someone who would offer her more. And that meant deciding to keep to her own objectives even if that sent the two of them on separate paths. She hadn’t tried to convince him to give up the Doctors Without Borders work that meant so much to him—she had simply told him that the choice he had made meant they couldn’t be together any longer.
But when it came to Sutter, it occurred to her that while she had no agenda to change his thinking or his objectives or path, in a way, for the first time, she was letting her own decision be interfered with instead.
Because right at that moment, she should have been at the Camden family home for Sunday dinner. She should have been with the grandmother, cousins and half brothers and half sisters she’d made it her goal to get to know. She should have been taking steps to move closer to getting what she wanted.
She hadn’t and wouldn’t ask Sutter to veer off his course for any reason. But unlike ever before, she was veering off her own. She was wasting precious time and opportunity, losing sight of her own goal just to be alone with Sutter. And all knowing full well that whatever she had with him would be nothing more than a brief interlude.
“And when he’s gone, what will you have?” she asked her reflection in the bathroom mirror she was cleaning.
The answer was that she still wouldn’t have the one thing she wanted—family here. Family to fall back on. Family to fill the gap in her life. Family that could help provide her with the foundation she felt she needed to make better choices in relationships in the future.
Okay, so Sutter had promised to get her another dinner with the Camden cousins later this week, she reasoned. But that still wouldn’t be time with GiGi. And there was no guarantee that all the Camdens would be available on another night while the Camden Sunday dinner was a no-miss event. And she was passing it up.
She shouldn’t have, she silently chastised herself.
Sutter was clear and unwavering in his own goals and she accepted that.
But she’d wavered in hers.
“It’s one thing if you can’t resist him, if you let this play out even when you know it won’t go anywhere lasting,” she told her reflection. “But it’s something else if you choose to be alone with him instead of doing what you should be doing.”
With the bathroom and bedroom straightened up, she went into the combined living, dining, kitchen portion of the place and glanced at the wall clock in her breakfast nook as if it would give her an answer as to how to correct the mistake she’d made.
But it was nearly seven and too late to go to the Camdens’ dinner now.
And even though she wanted to kick herself for it, the prospect of dinner alone with Sutter didn’t feel like a mistake. It was still something she wanted to do.
“But it has to stop here,” she warned herself. After tonight, she would refocus on what she’d set out to do.
Before anything else hindered it.
“So no more pussyfooting around,” she said, something she’d heard often from her stepfather when she or her brothers weren’t tackling a problem head-on.
Then the knock she was waiting for sounded at her door and she knew that Sutter was just outside.
That’s all it took to make her heart beat faster. And to realize that, in that moment, being with him was what she truly wanted to do over and above anything else.
“But starting tomorrow you change back and do what you need to do,” she whispered as she slipped her feet into her shoes and picked up the clutch.
Then she reached for the knob to open the door to the man she just couldn’t wait to be with.
* * *
“It’s too soon, Kinsey.”
Sutter had taken her to Morton’s Steakhouse in downtown Denver and they’d had a scrumptious dinner. Prosciutto-wrapped mozzarella, lobster bisque, peppercorn-rubbed steaks, baked potatoes and asparagus. She was too full even for chocolate cake—so they’d ordered some to take home with them.
It was while they waited for the cake and the bill that Kinsey had told him her plan. She’d made up her mind to call GiGi first thing in the morning and ask to meet with her. The time had come to discuss the fact that Mitchum Camden was her and her brothers’ biological father.
Her announcement had made Sutter frown and respond with the it’s-too-soon opinion.
“But when will it ever feel like the right time? It’s not the kind of revelation you can ease someone into. It just struck me today that I need to get on with it,” Kinsey said. She wasn’t—and didn’t have any intention of—telling him that the distraction he caused was the reason she was pushing her timetable.
“At least stick to your plan of taking the time to get to know them better as long as I’m here,” he went on. “I’ll keep getting you in over there, getting you together with them. Tonight was just—”
“I know. You’ve made good on your word,” she said before smiling and goading him a little. “Or was tonight just the beginning of a plot to keep them away from me and my nefarious schemes to swindle them?”
“I know you too well to believe you’re working any kind of angle other than trying to connect with your family—if they truly are your family. I still don’t know whether or not you’re really half-Camden and you shouldn’t expect anyone to believe it a hundred percent until there’s DNA that proves it. But yeah, you could be one of them—I’ve come over to your side on that. And on thinking that it does need confirmation for your sake and for theirs. But now that I have come over to your side, I just think it might go a little more smoothly if you really do let them get to know you well before you do anything.”
“It’ll be a shock no matter what—unless they somehow already know. But now I’m thinking that the longer I wait, the weirder it will be that I’ve hung around and not told them.”
“No, there isn’t any chance that it won’t be a shock,” he said.
“And there’s no time like the present,” she added with some finality.
Some finality that he ignored.
“What about your brothers? You said they aren’t on board. Shouldn’t you wait for their sake—since you are messing with something that involves them, too?”
“It doesn’t have to involve them if they don’t want it to. I won’t force them to meet anyone or have anything to do with the Camdens. From the beginning this has been something I need to do for myself. I’ll let the Camdens know that Conor and Liam and Declan are also out there. It will be up to all of them how far they take anything after that.”
The bill and the container with their dessert came
then and Sutter didn’t say anything as he placed his credit card in the leather-bound folder. But the lines between his eyes let her know he was still troubled.
Then the waiter left again and he said, “Nothing I can say will make you wait?”
Sitting across the table from her, he was dressed in a dark gray suit and silver-gray shirt with a matching tie that made him look dashing and debonair, and made her wish to go on having this view of him forever.
But she forced herself to remember that regardless of how much she might wish for it, he would not be a constant in her life. Before long, he wouldn’t be around to fill the gap.
“No. It’s time and I’m going to do it,” she said.
“It’s not going to be easy.”
“I know.”
“And it might get ugly,” he warned.
“I hope not. But I know that’s possible, too.”
The waiter returned with his credit card and the receipt for Sutter to sign.
When the waiter left once more, Sutter looked solemnly at her and said, “I don’t want you to do it alone.”
She laughed lightly at his protectiveness. “You think I’ll need a bodyguard?”
His smile was wicked as his lids lowered to half-mast and his gaze dropped to her cleavage for only a split second. “It’s a body worth guarding,” he murmured. Then he said, “I just don’t want you to have to face whatever comes out of this on your own.”
“They could welcome me with open arms. The end result could be a celebration,” she said hopefully.
His smile at that was kind. “Then I’ll be there to celebrate with you.”
But she knew he didn’t really believe that’s the way it would go. And she didn’t have any illusions about it herself, despite her show of optimism. Best case scenario, GiGi would be shocked, would need time to process it. There would be no celebrations or warm welcomes right away...even if she hoped they would come in time.
“I’ll leave it up to you,” he went on. “I can come with you, be right by your side. Or at least let me drive you over and wait for you in the car so I’m there when you come out.”
“You don’t have to,” she told him. “And if it goes horribly sour you’ll be associated with that. It might damage your own relationship with the Camdens—are you sure you’re willing to risk that?”
“I’m sure,” he said without thinking about it and with conviction.
He just never seemed to take a misstep that could let her like him a little less.
And it did help to think about having a bit more of that support he’d shown her before.
“I think it’s something I should do one-on-one with GiGi, but if you want to wait for me outside—”
“Done,” he decreed.
He stood then and pulled her chair out slightly so she could get up, too. “But I still think you should wait,” he said as she did.
“I know,” she answered, saying no more.
* * *
Sol was just leaving when Kinsey and Sutter arrived at the Knightlinger house after their dinner. Kinsey kept her coat on over her dress as she took the colonel upstairs to bed—buttoned up and concealing what she had on underneath.
The colonel took note, however, that plenty of leg showed, commended her for it and said nostalgically, “Oh, to have those days back.”
From there the elderly woman went through her own routine quickly so that it was only a matter of twenty minutes or so before she was settled into bed with Jack, her brandy, her oxygen, her book, her television remote control and her cell phone in case of emergency.
“Now get out of here and act like your evening didn’t get interrupted,” the colonel ordered, shooing Kinsey off.
* * *
“Want to go have a drink somewhere?” Sutter asked when he and Kinsey were back in his car.
Kinsey considered that. She’d had a nice day with the colonel. She’d had the opportunity to wear the red dress. She’d had a wonderful meal. She was convinced that she’d put herself back on course to achieving her goal by making up her mind and telling Sutter that she was going to contact GiGi Camden first thing in the morning.
But the truth was that from the moment she’d stopped being in Sutter’s arms the night before, everything seemed like nothing more than filler to get her to this moment.
And any chance of getting back into those arms.
“How about a drink and our cake at my place?” she countered.
He smiled as if she’d said exactly what he was hoping to hear and headed in that direction.
They were good at small talk and chatted through the short drive to her apartment. They chatted as they walked up the stairs to her door. They were still chatting as she unlocked it and they went in, as she closed and locked it behind them.
But that was as far as the small talk went because before she could turn on a light, he grabbed her and pulled her into a kiss that let her know he’d only been on pause since last night, too.
After basking in that kiss for a while, Kinsey ended it and said, “No drink or cake?”
“No drink or cake,” he answered, sounding barely in control. It made her smile as she took his hand and led him to her bedroom.
Along the way she told herself that this was like a once-in-a-lifetime vacation. She was going to make the most of it, all the while knowing that when it was over, it was over and would never happen again.
But she definitely intended to make the most of it.
Sutter didn’t let her turn on any lights in the bedroom either, so there was only the glow of the full moon coming in through her sheer curtains. But it was enough as he spun her into his arms again to restart their kissing with a hunger more intense than she’d ever experienced. A hunger churning inside of her, too.
He took off her coat while she stepped out of her shoes—all with mouths and tongues never missing a beat. Then went his suit coat and tie the same way—shed like chains he couldn’t wait to be free of.
Next he unzipped the back of her dress but before peeling it away he paused in kissing her to give it one last appreciative glance. To groan and say, “Oh, that dress...it’s been driving me crazy all night.”
Then he recaptured her mouth with his and finessed the tight red knit down her curves until it could fall to her feet where she stepped out of it.
That left her in only the matching lace panties and strapless bra. And his clothes against her almost-bare skin was a condition that had to be remedied. She made quick work of unfastening his shirt buttons, of yanking the tails from his waistband, though she was more careful when it came to pulling the material away from his injured shoulder. Then she threw the shirt as far away as she could and went on to his suit pants.
The waistband opened and the zipper slid down with ease, aided by what was burgeoning behind it. But as much as Kinsey wanted those slacks gone, she let them stay to torment him a little.
She wasn’t sure he noticed, though, because just then one of his hands dropped to her breasts, insinuating itself inside the demi-cup of her bra to cause a more efficient torment as he caressed and kneaded and teased and held her oh-so-sensitive flesh in that strong hand.
Kinsey nearly writhed with pleasure as he caught her nipple in the web of two fingers. Tugging and squeezing with that gentlest of pressures, he opened wide the door to desires that she’d been trying to bury for what seemed like an eternity.
Desires that couldn’t tolerate what was left of his clothes for another minute so she finally let drop everything he had on from the waist down.
Sutter took it from there and pried off his shoes and socks while continuing to plunder her mouth and tantalize her breasts.
And then she was the one overdressed because he had on nothing at all.
Knowing that provoked an even more compelling n
eed to see the entirety of that magnificent body of his. She arched back just enough to take a look downward.
There was no disappointment in store for her there. His upper half was only the prelude to a complete picture of the most impressive masculinity she’d ever laid eyes on.
Then he tipped her face up again with the curve of an index finger beneath her chin so he could return to kissing her, now with something new—a more measured, simmering heat that slowed things down as if to give him the opportunity to savor it all.
Kinsey wasn’t sure when or how he’d moved them nearer to her double bed but it was suddenly close enough for him to ease them both down onto it while still kissing her, while still enticing breasts he’d released from the captivity of the bra that he’d tossed aside.
Lying together on her bed she gave herself over to the pure sensations of kissing him, of having his hands on her. She lost herself in how good it all was, finally being with him, being up against his naked body, his mouth hers to play with.
She lost herself in every inch of his muscular back and shoulders and biceps and pecs. In every inch of his rock-hard abs and fabulous derriere. In impressively honed thighs that were the runways to that part of him that was just waiting for her attention.
Like the rest of him it was glorious. Long and thick. And just closing her hand around him drove him wild enough to break away from kissing her to moan, making her smile to have been the cause.
And when he started to kiss her again it wasn’t her mouth he found, instead it was the hollow of her neck and the straight path below it to her breasts.
First one, then the other, he drew them in, showing her even more of the talents he possessed with teeth and tongue.
And if that wasn’t enough, his hand sluiced down her stomach and underneath the elastic of her bikinis so he could reach between her legs to slip a finger inside of her and make her moan, too.
Then the heat turned up on that simmer and that urgent hunger came out once again.
Sutter suddenly pulled away from her and stood at the foot of the bed, devouring the sight of her as he removed her panties before he retrieved his slacks and took protection from his pocket.
The Marine Makes His Match Page 16