by Deb Loughead
I don’t move. “So tell me something. How come Kit and your watch ended up in the same place? Strange coincidence, no?”
I stare at her, daring her to give me an answer. When she doesn’t, I turn and walk right out of the washroom door to my next class, just as the bell echoes through the halls.
I know I have her. But I feel more sick about it than triumphant, which makes it hard to focus on my last two classes of the week. Did Ellie go back to class, or is she still hiding out in the washroom? Or did she have the guts to leave the school after all?
And what about Mac? Maybe he isn’t who Ellie first thought he was. She’s clearly afraid of him, for good reason, but not enough to dump him. What hold does he have on her? What is with Ellie’s bizarre behaviour? And why the hell did Mac try to yank me into the car with them? This morning I was almost certain it was because he wanted to talk me into covering for Ellie this weekend. But now I’m almost positive it must have been about the watch, and his fear that I found it yesterday.
I can’t forget the dark figure at the top of the quarry. And the sound of tires spinning on gravel as a car went speeding away. The Wildcat. It’s all starting to become achingly clear. Mac was up there looking for the watch, but took off when he spotted us. Ellie must have been up there with him, too. But what made them go back for the watch now? Did they try to find it earlier and give up? And did Ms. Stitski’s speech convince them to try again?
There’s something about that watch. Something incriminating? Judging by Ellie’s reaction when she saw it in my hand, finding it would mean a whole lot of relief for the two of them. Relief mixed with a desperate rage to get it back.
Ellie’s watch has got to be linked to Kit’s death. The coincidence is way too obvious. But that still doesn’t explain what Kit was doing with it that night, or prove that he even had it at all.
And so, as the rest of my class conjugates verbs aloud with our French teacher, I decide Ellie won’t be getting her watch back until I find out the truth.
After school Jake is waiting for me at my locker. In spite of all my misery, my heart does a little dance in my chest at the sight of him standing there looking seriously concerned.
“Did you find her? I texted you, but you never got back to me.”
“Oh, I found her all right,” I say as I pitch books into my backpack. “Let’s get out of here, and I’ll fill you in on the latest.”
As we wander slowly home, I tell him what happened with Mac that morning. Then I tell him about finding Ellie in the washroom, and my watch theory. Next I tell him everything else. Like how Ellie is trying to force me to cover for her this weekend. That she has bruises on her arm and face, which she blamed on her mom. That I’m positive I know her reason for starting that rumour. I empty out every stupid thing that’s been making me crazy, yammering non-stop, as he listens, concerned.
“You know, I’ve never heard you talk so much,” he says when I finally take a breath.
“Yeah, sorry. I had a ton to unload, and nobody else to dump it on. It just feels so good to finally share it with someone. And her story about the bruises, and her split lip? It has to be Mac, but why would she let him treat her that way?”
We’re standing on the same corner as earlier this week, where I knocked him off his skateboard. Was that only this week? It feels like ages ago. I still have no idea where I stand with Jake, or where this new relationship is headed. Funny thing, though, I’m less obsessed about it now, more willing to let nature take its course. I almost feel ashamed of all the energy I wasted daydreaming about him for so long, instead of just talking to him. I’m definitely ashamed of how fixated on him I was at the quarry that horrible night. Because if I hadn’t been, then the brutal ending to this story might have turned out differently.
Live and learn, as my dad always says when we mess up, only to be met with eye rolls. Maybe he’s right after all.
“Glad I could help by being your garbage heap,” Jake says. “I feel honoured. I think.”
That’s when he does it. Leans right over and kisses me. A soft, tentative one, right on the lips. And floating there, in a state of mild shock, I take a chance and kiss him back. He tastes delicious, like spearmint. For a moment I think I might know what flying feels like, and I don’t want the kiss to stop. But when it does, we stare at each other and smile.
“I think I like where this is going, Clems,” he says. “Hope you do, too.”
“You can’t even imagine how much,” I tell him.
He hugs me with those lanky arms, and I lean in and hug him back, my head tucked into his shoulder. That’s when I spot the blue Wildcat as it lurches to a stop at the corner. Before it can speed off, though, the passenger door flies open.
Ellie leaps out, then bolts across the intersection, heading straight for us, as car horns blast from every direction.
13
She reaches us just as the Wildcat pulls a U-turn and roars up to the curb. The tinted window slides down.
“Come on, get your butt back in the car, Ellie,” Mac yells out the window. “Why are you acting like such a freakin’ maniac right now?”
“Speak for yourself,” she yells back.
Then she leans up against Jake and me, cowering like a scared puppy. We stare at Mac and he stares right back.
“If you two are smart you’ll stay out of it. You have no clue what you’re getting into with that messed-up chick. Or me,” he warns us before he speeds off.
When she finally looks at us, Ellie’s face is soaked with tears, her eyes bloodshot.
“Okay, so you want to hear what really happened that night?” she asks.
“It’s about time,” I tell her without a trace of sympathy in my voice.
We grab some snacks at the convenience store, then sit on a bench in front of the plaza. As Ellie finally starts talking, she almost seems to be in a trance, her eyes fixed in the distance as if they’re looking into the past.
“So, I ran into Mac that night, like you already know. And we just couldn’t let go of each other. It was amazing. We danced and partied with everybody, and after a while he led me away from the bonfire, over to a dark place in the bushes, where we could … well, you know.”
She pauses to nibble on a potato chip. I don’t want her to stop talking.
“Yeah, we get it, Ellie,” I say. “Keep going.”
She takes a deep breath. “Okay, so then Kit comes stumbling along after a bit and practically crashes right into us. He starts laughing and saying ‘I know what you’re doing. I know what you’re doing.’ And he keeps poking me in the back.”
“Yep, that sounds like Kit,” Jake says. I touch his arm so he won’t say any more.
“So then he spots my watch. The moon was so bright that night, it was even sparkling. And you remember how much he liked the stones, so he starts begging me to try it on. And you know how it is when he grabs hold of your wrist, and won’t let go? Well, he started doing that to me, too.” She takes a couple of deep, gasping breaths. “And Mac tells me to just give the watch to him, so he’ll get lost and leave us alone.”
Uh-oh. I’m starting to see where this is going already. I close my eyes and wait for the rest. As if he’s sensing my distress, Jake slips his arm around my shoulder.
“So, I give him the stupid watch, just to get rid of him, and he goes running away with it.” Her tears fall faster now, but she doesn’t wipe them off her cheeks. “And after that Mac and I never even saw him again. And we didn’t try to find him either.”
“Oh, crap, Ellie,” I say.
“So, it’s totally my fault he died. Not your fault, Clems. Mine! And Kit’s mom is looking for answers. I’ve got a few, and if she finds out, she’ll think Mac and I are murderers. She’ll have us charged, and we’ll have to go to jail! She’s a freaking lawyer!”
“Giving him your watch doesn’t make you a murderer,” I
tell her in a firm voice, so she’ll listen to me. “That doesn’t change anything else that happened that night.”
Ellie sniffles loud and long. “It totally does, Clem. For me and Mac. And you were right. That rumour totally was my backup plan. It was insurance, to stop all this from coming back on us.”
“So, you actually believed it was a good idea to screw Spencer over to save your own hides?” Jake shakes his head. He’s disgusted by Ellie. “That’s just plain sick.”
“Sick and pathetic,” I say. “You’d say anything to cover your own ass, wouldn’t you?”
Ellie slumps forward on the bench and starts sobbing. I look at Jake and shrug because there isn’t anything left to say. Nothing can change the awfulness of what happened that night, even if the police did find out what happened with Ellie, Mac, and Kit. We’re each at fault in one way or another, the four of us. Ellie and Mac just fill in the last pieces of the puzzle.
I dig the watch out of my pocket as Ellie sits up and wipes off her face. Lately, all she ever seems to do is cry. I hold the watch out.
“You want this back? Maybe you can get it fixed or something.”
“God, no.” She pushes my hand away. “I never want to look at that thing again. Or Mac! I’m just so sick and tired of everything that’s been happening. He actually thinks we should get rid of the stupid watch for good.”
“Because it’s evidence, and he’s scared?” I ask, and she nods. “And you told him I found it. You were texting him in the washroom today, right?”
Another big, fat tear rolls out. “So then he waited for me after school, near my street, and asked me to give him the watch. I said I didn’t have it, and he said I needed to get it from you. And he squeezed my wrist and it hurt. And I started getting really scared.”
“Oh, cripes.” I shake my head. Why did she have to let it get this far? She should have ditched him ages ago. But maybe he didn’t let her, because of the secret between them.
“We drove along your route home from school to try to find you. To get the watch back. He was so upset, pounding on the steering wheel and stuff. Acting all sketchy, and it started to scare me even more. When I saw you guys, I pretty much jumped out of his car.”
“Sounds like he’s getting desperate,” Jake says. “He knows that watch can link the two of you to what happened to Kit. And now that we have it, he’s probably afraid we’ll go to the cops and rat him out.”
Ellie just sits there nodding and scrubbing at her smudgy eyes. At that point I decide not to put it off any longer. I need to know for certain right now.
“Okay, so what’s the real story about your split lip?” I ask with a challenge in my voice. “Did Mac do that to you? Is he slapping you around Ellie? Because if he is …”
“I already told you. He didn’t smack me. Mac picked me up on the way to school that morning, and we were goofing around, play-wrestling in the car. My mouth bashed into his forehead. It started bleeding, so I had to wait ’til it stopped, and I was late for class. That’s why I was crying. I was afraid of getting in trouble again. I didn’t tell you the truth because I knew you wouldn’t believe it was an accident.”
“And the arm thing? That wasn’t because of your mom or Mac?” I ask, still skeptical. “I’m finding it hard to believe anything you’ve told me lately.”
“Just a bruise from climbing around at the quarry. We went looking for the watch a few days ago, and I wiped out on the rocks. That’s the total truth.”
“Yeah, Clem got hurt over there, too.” Jake looks at me and winces.
Ellie wipes her nose on her sleeve. “My life has been a complete mess ever since June. Because of that watch. You should just give the stupid thing to him and let him do what he needs to with it. And forget about all this, Clems.”
Her life has been a mess? “It’s way too late for that Ellie. And I’m holding on to this watch myself for now.”
Jake and Ellie come home with me after that. It’s been absolute ages since she’s been at my place. She hasn’t dropped by all summer long — she was too busy with her so-called boyfriend. It’s almost like a homecoming when she steps inside. She looks around at everything familiar, and smiles wide. “I miss your place,” she murmurs.
Zach’s jaw drops when we all walk in, and for once in his life, he’s speechless. Mom’s thrilled though. She hugs Ellie twice, then gives me two thumbs-up about Jake behind his back.
Dad’s just happy to have new guinea pigs — Friday is the night he likes to try out recipes he’s discovered watching food shows and surfing the net.
Tonight he’s trying Thai food. He puts us to work making the peanut sauce, cooking glass noodles, and chopping cilantro, carrots, and green onions for the fresh spring rolls. Then we bundle everything in the flimsy rice-paper wraps, which keep on ripping in our untrained hands. Meanwhile, Dad, Mom, and Zach are working on the coconut-chicken curry soup that they’re making from scratch. The kitchen smells scrumptious, and our phones stay switched off the whole time. Our guests’ phones, too, which they actually agreed to without making a fuss.
It took Ellie a bit of convincing until I explained the upside.
“Huh,” she said. “I never thought about it, but I guess it could be freeing, not having to be on call for your friends all the time.” She raised one eyebrow.
“Yeah, exactly, Els,” I told her. Or boyfriends you should really just dump.
And then, joy of joys, we finally get to sit down and eat our amazing Thai dinner!
“Okay, that’s it,” Jake says between mouthfuls of cold spring roll. “I’m starting this tradition in our family, too.” Then he frowns. “Except nobody likes to cook.”
“Then I guess you’ll have to be the chef,” Dad says with a wink. “It’s simple, Jake. And if you hang around here often enough, you just might learn something.”
An instant blush creeps up my neck. Really, Dad?
Ellie won’t quit glancing over at her phone, which is understandable, since it came as a shock to the system the first time I tried it.
“Don’t worry, you get used to it after a while,” Mom says, patting her hand.
“Or you could cheat,” I add. When Mom shoots me a look across the table, I change the subject quick. “Okay, so costumes for tomorrow night, Dad. How about if Jake and I dress as Macbeth and Lady Macbeth? Do you have any costumes in your drama department that you could pinch for us? Your school performs a lot of Shakespeare, doesn’t it?”
“We did Macbeth last year for the spring show,” Dad says. “Maybe if you bribe me by cleaning up this kitchen, I can slip over there tomorrow morning and check out the costume cupboard, borrow something that could work.”
“That would be so cool,” I say, even though Jake’s eyebrows just shot up.
“Seriously?” He shrugs. “I guess that’s okay. As long as I don’t have to wear a dress.”
“Maybe I’ll just skip the dance.” Ellie gazes into her soup bowl, fiddles with her spoon.” I don’t even have a date, and it’s a Sadie Hawkins, right.”
“Yeah, maybe you should just stay home for a change,” I agree, feeling very little sympathy for her.
“I don’t have a costume anyway.” She’s staring at me now with pleading eyes.
“Yeah, it’s kind of late for that now, Ellie,” I remind her.
“But you could go as Banquo’s ghost, Ellie,” Dad suggests with a huge grin on his face, and I look over and shoot daggers with my eyes. He doesn’t even catch on. And of course Ellie’s eyes light up.
“Great idea, honey,” Mom says, smiling at Dad.
“Wow! That would be so cool,” Ellie says, a smile starting to form on her face.
“I can check the costume room,” Dad says. “I know there’s a sort of white cloak with a ‘blood-stained’ hood covering the entire head. And eyeholes. Like a beefed-up traditional bedsheet ghost costume. Hope no
body’s borrowed it already.”
“Perfect. And it sure beats hanging out at home with my mom, anyway.” She sort of frowns. “Mom’s not too thrilled to chill with me these days, either. Guess I kinda can’t blame her.”
There’s no stopping this runaway train now. Looks like Ellie’s coming to the dance solo. And right now she almost looks like a sad little girl in desperate need of cheering up. And it almost seems like she’s starting to regret some of the utterly dumb choices she’s made lately. Or maybe she’s just faking it. It’s so hard to tell with her these days.
I still can’t imagine what she was thinking. Couldn’t she see how badly she’d been messing up? How out of control things were getting? I truly hope this will be a turning point for my old friend, and that she’ll actually try to turn things around.
“Okay, Dad,” I say. “You have a deal. We’ll do the kitchen for you and you get us the costumes.”
Dad looks around at the food-prep disaster area that the kitchen has become and smiles. “It’s so worth it.”
While we eat, Mom tells me how Kevin seemed so happy today and how he went up to her and told her about his study plans with me at the library Sunday afternoon.
“He sounded excited about it. And the other teachers agree that it’s a great plan. Especially taking your brother along.” Mom kisses the top of my head. When I catch Ellie watching us, she looks away.
“Wait, what?” Zach says through a mouthful of noodles. “What are you talking about?”
“Well, Zach, I thought it would be nice if you came along too. Kind of like a role model for Kevin. And I told him you’d let him know what time. I really need you there. I promised him.”
“What? No way. Anyway I’m busy this Sunday.”
“You’ll think about it? Well that’s great to hear, Zach.” Dad winks at my brother.
Zach nearly chokes, then glares at me across the table.
That night Ellie and I have our first sleepover in ages. It feels as if we’re ten years old again. We even have a pillow fight, jumping back and forth between the twin beds in my room like we used to do back when we were sweet and innocent little kids. Then we give each other manicures and pedicures and start talking our faces off.