I see things in my children now that were always there, but I didn’t recognize them. How could I? Janie, who doesn’t just look like me and have a good dose of her father in her, has the Quinn spirit as well. I love hearing the stories Celia and George tell of how much Janie and I are like Camellia Quinn-Miller. In Janie and me, they see my grandmother’s facial expressions, her walk, and the way she held her hand when she waved. We have her laugh and her love of life.
Camellia was married to a man who had allowed his resentment and circumstances to embitter him to the point that he would tear apart his own family. Yet, until the day that her daughter and granddaughter were taken from her, she had brought joy and laughter into the Miller home.
And Janie and I are like Lucy when she was a young woman. She had her mother’s spirit, curiosity and determination. And still, to this day, the way she holds her hand when she waves is like her mother, like Janie and like me. Paul has her eyes, her nose, and her playful personality. “Not a serious bone in her body,” Celia has told us is what Jonathan Tadyshak would say about the girl he loved.
George has cried and let us see his tears, but he also smiles—slight smiles—as the stories are shared, and he’ll pat Janie, Paul, or me on the shoulder and say, “Yup.”
Lucy has survived, living a life of simplicity, finding joy each day in what is blooming. Maybe to keep the memory of what happened from being right there in front of her. I cannot stop grieving over her loss, but I will always be in awe of her spirit, her strength and her capacity for joy.
So there you have it, the story of how I came to love an island and how I found my way home. How could the pieces be put back together again? Never quite the same, some cracks, but recognizable.
I was drawn to an island at first sight in a way I have never been drawn to any other place, which makes me wonder if a heart can remember what a mind forgets and then lead a person home? A heart must be able to do such things or, perhaps, as Sara Strauss would say, “What a huge cazingydink!”
My Way Home
Where thou art—that—is—Home
~Emily Dickinson
Rhubarb Strawberry Cream Cheese Muffins
With Coconut Streusel Topping
Yield: 18 standard muffins
Batter:
2 eggs
1 cup granulated sugar
½ cup sour cream
8 ounces cream cheese (softened)
1 teaspoon pure vanilla
½ cup oil
2 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt
2 cups chopped rhubarb (can substitute green apples)
2 cups strawberries quartered
Streusel Topping (recipe below)
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a large bowl beat eggs and sugar. Continue beating and add sour cream, cream cheese, vanilla, and oil. In a separate bowl, mix flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Slowly, beat in dry ingredients. Fold in rhubarb and strawberries.
Butter or spray muffin tins and fill 2/3 full with batter. Divide Streusel Topping over each muffin. Bake in a preheated oven for 25-30 minutes.
Streusel Topping:
1 ½ cups flour
2/3 cup granulated sugar
¼ teaspoon salt
½ cup sweetened coconut (optional for those nutty people who don’t like coconut)
¾ cup cold butter, cut into pieces
Mix together flour, sugar, salt, and coconut. Blend in butter with your fingertips until mixture is crumbly.
My Way Home (St.Gabriel Series Book 1) (St. Gabriel Series) Page 33