Charisse stared at Marvin in a daze. She wanted to beg him to change his mind but she didn’t have the strength. She couldn’t find the words to convince him if she wanted to.
Just this morning, she’d been thinking that all she had to do was find a way to silence him, but now he had something else on her. And she wondered if he knew more than what he was admitting. She wondered if maybe he would reveal some of her other secrets, but only when he thought it was necessary. He would do it as a way to control her.
But Charisse would die before she would allow him to expose her. Either that or she would kill Marvin and put an end to all of this for good.
Chapter 23
WHITNEY
NORMALLY, I didn’t weigh myself in the evening, but I stepped onto my chrome-trimmed scale and waited for the digital readout. I’d done exceptionally well all day long, only eating what was allowed, but I was still concerned about that pound I had gained. I’d discovered it first thing this morning and I knew this was a result of all those doughnuts I had eaten. Of course, I was wishing I hadn’t purchased them, but last night had been a depressing time for me. It had been a time when I wasn’t feeling all that great about myself and I was worried that Rico didn’t want me. I worried that he was losing interest in what we had together and that my latest attempt at trying to lose weight was hopeless. Then, subconsciously, I worried about Taylor and what she was going through medically.
I stepped off the scale, and thankfully, I still weighed the same as I had this morning. This was a good thing because chances were I could lose that extra pound with no problem.
Next, I walked over to my vanity and started applying my makeup. I’d already finished my hair, and while Rico wasn’t planning to pick me up for another hour, I didn’t want to wait until the last minute to get ready. We’d made plans to see a movie and then have dinner afterward.
I pulled out six cosmetic brushes, one to apply foundation, one to set it with powder, one to apply blush, two to apply eye shadow, and one for my lip color. Once upon a time, the only brushes I had ever used were those that came with each product. But then one day, one of the Lancôme reps had insisted that brushes were a necessity. She explained that if I used them, my makeup would go on so much more smoothly and a lot more evenly. At first, I’d decided that she was simply trying to make a sale and that I didn’t really need what she was suggesting, but the more she spoke the more I understood what she was saying. So, before I knew it, I had spent well over a hundred dollars and was on my way out to the parking lot.
But I had to admit that it was a good decision because I’d soon started receiving a ton of compliments on how perfect my makeup looked. It became so noticeable that Taylor and even Charisse, the woman who never took advice from anyone, had rushed out to buy the same thing. And best of all, a Mary Kay consultant had asked if I wanted to become one of her models and attend some of her parties. Which I still couldn’t fathom because who in their right mind would want to see a two-hundred-plus woman modeling anything? It didn’t make much sense to me, and while the woman had called me periodically for two straight months, I’d never agreed to do it. I’d chickened out the same as always. Still it was nice to know that someone had actually been interested.
When I finished the final touches, I walked out into my bedroom and picked up the outfit I’d purchased earlier. I’d been trying hard not to buy anything expensive, not with me still losing weight, but when I’d seen this periwinkle V-necked sweater, I hadn’t been able to bypass it. Plus, I couldn’t imagine not buying it when I was now able to wear it one size smaller. This, for some, would have been a tiny feat, but for me it was something to be very proud of.
I sprayed on Sicily, my favorite cologne, and slipped on my new sweater and a pair of black pants. Actually, I didn’t look half bad, and I was hoping Rico felt the same way. I wanted him to be content because it still bothered me that he had never gone out with someone my size. There was still a part of me that wondered when he was going to inform me that he couldn’t take it anymore. But hopefully, it wouldn’t be tonight—and definitely not before my reunion.
I still had maybe another half hour so I went into the family room and turned on the CD player. Anthony Hamilton belted out strong, endearing lyrics the way I wanted him to. I’d loved this man’s work from the moment I’d first heard it.
I sat down on the sofa, flipping through the latest issue of Essence, but my doorbell rang. Rico was early, but I was fine with that because I was completely ready.
However, when I opened the door, my heart sank. I wasn’t sure why they were here, but my mother and sister just stared at me. I stared right back and then finally my mother spoke up.
“Bet you didn’t expect to see us, did you?” she said, walking in without being asked.
“I hope we didn’t interrupt anything,” Tina said, following behind her.
I was still speechless, but I closed the door and joined those two skinny witches in the family room. I would never mention it, but with both of them having the same shoulder-length weave, the same mocha complexion, and being about the same height, they actually looked like sisters. Not to mention they both had that same irritating voice I hated hearing.
“Are you expecting someone?” Mother said.
“Actually, I am,” I said, already wishing they would leave.
“Who?” Tina asked.
“A friend.”
“Oh. Well, Mother and I were just in the area and we figured we’d stop by.”
I didn’t say anything.
“You are okay with this, aren’t you?” Mother asked.
“I’m fine. I won’t be able to visit with you for very long, but this is fine.”
“I guess we could have called, but since you’re my daughter, I didn’t think it was necessary,” Mother said.
Well, it was necessary and I wish you wouldn’t just drop in like this. That’s what I wanted to say, but I held my tongue.
“This is fine,” I said again. “So, how have you been?”
“Fine,” she said, and I wondered how many more “fines” we were going to exchange. It was a sad day in America when this was the only thing a mother and daughter could think to say to each other.
“Good,” I said.
“We went shopping all day today,” Tina boasted. “And we bought a lot of nice stuff. There were so many sales at the mall.”
“Really?” I said. I already knew about the sales because I’d gone to the mall myself, but I acted as though I was surprised by it.
“I bought two pairs of shoes, a pair of fitted boots, two cashmere sweaters, a pair of riding pants, and a leather jacket,” Tina continued.
“What did you buy, Mother?” I asked, hoping Tina would shut her trap.
“Oh, not a lot. Just a new fur coat.”
“I’ll bet that’s nice,” I said. “I know you love those.”
“It’s beautiful,” Mother said. “I’ve been wanting a full-length sable for quite some time. It’s sort of an early birthday present to myself.”
Tina cut her eyes at me but I ignored her.
“So, who are you expecting?” Mother asked.
“He’s just a friend,” I said.
“He?” Tina said.
“Yes.”
“So, you’re going out on a date?” Mother said.
“Yes.”
“And who is this person?” Mother asked, and I knew right then that the conversation was about to head downhill.
“I met him at the health club.”
“Health club?” Tina asked. “Since when did you start going there?”
“Last week.”
“Well, is it helping?” she said, smirking.
“As a matter of fact, it is, Tina. As a matter of fact, I’ve lost ten pounds,” I said, proudly.
“Ten pounds? Where? Because to me, you don’t look any different.”
“Well, maybe it’s because you haven’t seen me in a while,” I explained.
“I guess
,” Tina said, raising her eyebrows.
“Are you watching what you eat?” Mother asked.
“Yes. I’m watching my carbohydrates.”
“So, are you saying you’re not eating any bread, sweets, or anything with sugar?” Mother said, clearly not believing me.
“Yes. That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
“Hmmph,” Mother grunted. “Well, I sure hope you can keep it up this time.”
And I sure hope I never have to see you again.
I wanted so desperately to tell Mother just that but I didn’t want to disrespect her. Mostly, I didn’t want to work myself into a frenzy before Rico got here.
“What did you have to eat today?” Tina asked.
“Why?”
“I’m just asking because I just can’t believe you’re not eating any sweets. And what about soda? Because I remember a time when you would drink whole six-packs in one afternoon. Especially, when we were in high school.”
“Well, I wouldn’t worry about it, Tina. I’m doing what I need to do for me and it’s really none of your business.”
“Your sister is only trying to encourage you,” Mother said, and I wanted to punch her. Sadly enough, I wanted to assault my own mother, and I hated when she forced me to feel like this.
“Mother, why do you always take Tina’s side with everything?”
“I don’t. I only stand up for what’s right, and right now, you’re wrong for speaking to your sister like this.”
“What?” She’s the one who’s being rude to me. And in my own house for that matter.”
“Mother, let’s go,” Tina said, standing up.
“This is such a shame,” Mother said, still sitting. “It’s such a shame, Whitney, that you can’t get along with your only sister. Especially since I raised you so much better than that.”
“No, Tina is the one who can’t get along with me. She’s always picked with me and I refuse to put up with it anymore.”
Mother finally stood up and then said, “I hate saying this, but the reason you act this way is because of how you look. All that weight has you miserable and it has you taking out your frustrations on your sister. Sometimes you even take it out on me, but I don’t let it bother me because I know you can’t help it.”
I could feel my heart beating rapidly and my hands felt sweaty, but this was not uncommon. Not when I had to physically see and deal with these two tramps standing before me. I hadn’t planned on attacking them, but if they didn’t leave soon, they would leave me no choice.
“Mother, I’m really sorry to hear that you feel that way, and maybe it’ll be best if the two of you just leave.”
“This is so typical,” Tina said, snickering.
“Meaning what?” I asked.
“You getting upset because I look better than you. You getting upset because you can’t get a man. You getting upset because Mom and I are best friends. Shall I go on?”
“No, that’s quite enough. But for the record, I don’t care about any of what you just said. And if you think I’m jealous of you in any way, you need to think again. I mean, why would I envy any woman who slept with a married man for three years, was stupid enough to get pregnant by him and then think he was going to leave his wife?”
I felt redeemed when I saw the shock on my mother’s face.
“Yeah, Mother,” I continued. “I’ll bet you didn’t know about your precious little girl stalking one of the vice presidents where she used to work and him getting a restraining order against her. I’ll bet you didn’t know he gave her money to get rid of that baby she was carrying and then made her resign from the company. And I’m positive you don’t know that Ms. Thing here started having sex when she was only eleven.”
“You’re a liar,” Tina yelled. “Mother, she’s lying on me and she knows it.”
“I know,” Mother said, caressing my sister’s back, both of them walking to the front door.
“Whitney, you should be ashamed of yourself,” Mother said. “I mean, I knew you were jealous of Tina, but this is insane. You’ve really gone too far this time.”
I shook my head, trying to understand how my mother could disregard what I was saying. Because the thing was, I would never lie on my sister. I wondered why Mother didn’t want to hear how sneaky Tina was, because she had always been that way since we were children.
“I am so disappointed in you,” Mother said, looking back at me when they both stepped outside.
“Well, you know what, Mother, not as disappointed as I am in you.”
“Disappointed why, Whitney?”
“Because you’ve always treated me so terribly. And the more I think about it, Tina is only being the person you taught her to be.”
“You’re talking crazy, girl,” Mother said.
“No I’m not. When we were children, you slept with more married men than I can count. So, my guess is that you’re not all that shocked about Tina doing the same thing. You’re just shocked that she never told you about it.”
“I won’t listen to this,” she said, and they started walking.
I watched and waited until they were ready to get into the car.
“Oh, and Mother,” I said, “one last thing…have a great time at your surprise birthday party on November twentieth.”
She stared at me in a dejected sort of fashion, and next I saw Rico parking his SUV. My sister slammed her door and jammed on the accelerator and I was happy they were gone. I was even happy that I’d finally stood up to both of them and told them what I thought.
“Who was that?” Rico said, coming up the sidewalk.
“My mother and sister.”
“Really? I wish they had stayed so I could meet them.”
“Maybe some other time,” I said, knowing it wouldn’t be anytime soon. Rico scanned me from head to toe.
“You look good,” he said, kissing me on the lips.
“Thanks. You do, too.”
“I know,” he said, and we both laughed.
“So, are you ready?” he asked.
“Actually, I am. Just let me turn off the stereo and get my purse,” I said, heading toward my bedroom and leaving him in the entryway.
“Hey,” he said and, I turned to look at him.
“Yeah?”
“I meant what I said.”
“About what?”
“You really, really look good. You look beautiful.”
I smiled and wondered if he knew how much I’d needed to hear that.
I was sure he didn’t have a clue.
Chapter 24
TAYLOR
IT HAD BEEN THREE WEEKS since I’d first seen Dr. Green, and while I’d also gotten a second opinion, the diagnosis had remained unchanged. The tumor in my uterus needed to be removed and there were no other options to be considered. Still, a part of me had been hoping I wouldn’t have to go through with this. Deep down, I’d been hoping that there was some other procedure, something a lot less aggressive, that could be performed on me. I’d been praying that there was a better way to go about handling this but there wasn’t.
And now here I was packing the last of my overnight bag and preparing to head to the hospital. My parents had driven into town last night, but they were now at a restaurant having breakfast. I, of course, had been fasting since just before midnight and wouldn’t be able to eat until well after surgery. Which actually wasn’t as much of a problem as I had thought it would be. I’d been sure that I was going to be completely famished but maybe my nerves were preventing it. I was nervous because I’d agreed to sign a consent form authorizing Dr. Green to perform a hysterectomy in the event that he did find cancer. I’d had to think long and hard about it, but in the end, I knew that staying alive was more important to me than having a child. Still, the thought of it all had me uneasy.
And then there was my relationship with Cameron. He’d been extremely attentive ever since that day I’d gone to his office and told him about my illness, but I couldn’t get past what his first
reaction had been. I couldn’t ignore what I knew he still had to be thinking and it had even affected our normal level of intimacy. I’d gotten my period again last week, only twenty days after returning from Los Angeles, but this week Cameron had wanted sex with me every evening. He’d acted as though we might never be able to make love again, and that truly bothered me. It made me wonder just how long we would continue being a couple.
But I couldn’t worry about such issues at the moment. What I needed to do was try to calm myself down and prepare for whatever was going to be. I’d prayed more than I had in my life, my church members had done the same, and my mother had already claimed a positive recovery. She’d told me first thing this morning that God’s will would be done and that I was going to be fine. Of course, I was hoping that His will would be for me to marry and have children one day, and I tried not to focus on anything different.
I stuffed a comb, brush, some body lotion, and a few other needed items into my bag and zipped it closed. Thankfully, I wouldn’t be there more than a day or two and I would be wearing a hospital gown for the duration. I smiled when I remembered the days when patients could count on being in the hospital at least a week and it didn’t matter how minor their illness was—days when insurance carriers didn’t force medical facilities to kick you out as soon as possible. I remembered the time my mother had gone to the hospital to have something similar to what I was having today and she’d packed the most beautiful lingerie. It had been almost like she’d been planning what clothing to take on a vacation, but the real reason was that she wanted to look good for any visitors. It was so amazing how times had changed so radically.
When I started to walk into the bathroom, my phone rang. I was sure it was Cameron, wanting to know if we were ready, but instead someone from my firm was calling.
“Hello?”
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