Gecko Gladiator

by Ali Sparkes

  “Watch from behind our curtains at all times!” scoffed Danny. “What does she think we are—spies? Doesn’t she know we have to go to school? And bed?”

  “She’s going a bit crazy,” Josh said. He rubbed his nose and looked worried. “I thought she might if we told her about the marbles.”

  “Hey—she’s lost her marbles!” quipped Danny, but Josh gave him a stony look. “OK, I’ll shut up,” Danny sighed.

  They stepped out into Princessland, trying to act normal again. Or more normal than last time. And then a series of things happened very fast.

  First, Josh was knocked over as somebody ran past him. Then someone else tripped over him, cursing loudly, and then a large coat was shoved in his face and then a loud alarm went off.

  Danny, who’d gone ahead, trying to avoid looking at the fairy outfits, was spun around by the impact of someone bashing into his shoulder. It was the woman in the long coat, running past him. Her daughter, who wasn’t wearing a long coat anymore, was pulling stuff out of her jumper and chucking it on the floor as she skidded after her mother, bawling “Maa! Maaa! Wait for meeeee!”

  Danny ran over to Josh, who was struggling out from under the coat. Just as his surprised face emerged there was a shout. “OY! You two! STOP RIGHT THERE!” And a heavy hand landed on Danny’s shoulder.

  “SO! You think nicking stuff from Princessland is a joke, do you?” said the voice. Danny looked up, shocked, into the face of a burly security guard. “Well, sunshine, I’m calling the police … and you two …” The guard dragged Josh up by his collar, “… are coming with ME!”

  Josh and Danny were dragged along by their elbows through the shop, loudly protesting their innocence. The store manager, a thin, nervous-looking man in a pale pink shirt, hurried behind them carrying the dumped coat and all the things that had dropped out of it. They all arrived in a small square office with two-way mirror windows, a desk, and three chairs. On the wall was a sign that read “WE ALWAYS PROSECUTE SHOPLIFTERS!” The guard shoved them across the room and pulled the door shut, while the manager hit a button on the wall that silenced the alarm.

  “Right!” snapped the security guard. He wore a gray uniform, a peaked cap, and a menacing look on his rather square face. “So … let’s see what we have here, shall we?” He took the coat and the things bundled up with it and began slapping them all, one by one, onto the desk. “ONE—Diddly DeeDee double doll set. TWO—Diddly DeeDee fashion boots set. THREE—Diddly DeeDee doggy kennel including Diddly Doggy and DiddlyDoggy Dinner Dish.”

  Danny let out a snort of laughter. He just couldn’t help it. The security guard’s large sausage-thick fingers paused just as they were about to pluck yet another Diddly DeeDee treat from the coat. “You think this is funny, do you, boy? You thinking cheating us out of Diddly DeeDees is just a joke, do you?”

  Danny snorted again. Josh bit his lip. Then they both burst out laughing.

  “Have it your way!” snarled the security guard, emptying another ten or twelve packets of Princessland goodies all over the desk, including three yellow toy microphones. “Let’s see what the police have to say about this, shall we? Mr. Butch—please call the police!”

  “Erm—I’ll have to call from the manager’s office,” Mr. Butch said. “You’d better come with me to verify what’s happened …”

  “Fine—we’ll lock these two young thieves in here until they arrive!” the security guard said. And then he and the manager went out and slammed the door shut, locking it firmly behind them.

  “Oh dear,” gurgled Danny, wiping away tears.

  Josh got control. “This is not good, Danny! This is really not good. What will Mom and Dad say when we get arrested? For shoplifting?!”

  “We’re innocent!” repeated Danny. “They’ll believe us! And there must be security cameras or something, where we can show them the real shoplifters!”

  “But … Mom and Dad will want to know why we were here,” pointed out Josh.

  Danny’s face went serious. “Oh no …” he moaned. “What if people we know find out that we were in Princessland? We’ll have to move! Leave town!”

  “There’s only one thing for it,” Josh said. “We’ve got to escape before they make us tell them our names and addresses.” He pulled the bottle of GeckoSWITCH out of his pocket. “And this is how!”

  Danny jumped to his feet. “Spray me! NOW!”

  When the security guard and Mr. Butch came back to tell the two young criminals that the police were on their way, they were shocked into silence. As soon as they unlocked the door and stepped into the tiny office they could see the inmates had vanished. Completely.

  “Whaaa-aaa-aaa?” inquired the security guard. Mr. Butch just stood with his mouth opening and closing, no sound coming out. They checked under the desk. In a cupboard. Even behind some coats that hung from hooks on the wall.

  “But—but—but … how?” spluttered the security guard. His eyes bulged with disbelief. “We locked them in! And that’s a proper deadlock, that is! And there’s no window to the outside … and no way they could have gone through the floor … it’s solid concrete!”

  “Well, I’m … flabbergasted!” Mr. Butch said.

  They continued to stare all around the room. Eventually they even looked up at the ceiling. If they’d done that as soon as they’d walked in, they might have gotten a clue as to how Danny and Josh escaped. They might have seen a sleek leopard-skinned gecko and a shiny pink gecko dart across the ceiling tiles.

  But by the time they’d even thought to look up, Josh and Danny had long since run down the wall and out through the top corner of the open door.

  “Who-hoooo! Score!” cheered Danny. They ran speedily along the ceiling of the store, skittering with great ease around light fixtures and suspended signs. It was a fabulous ceiling to walk on—smooth and white with enough obstacles to be fun. He didn’t even mind that he was still pink and Josh had got to be the cool leopard-skinned version again.

  “Head for the door,” called Josh. “We’d better get outside before we change back. We don’t want to drop from this height when we S.W.I.T.C.H. back into boyaaaaaaaaaagh!”

  At this point, Josh S.W.I.T.C.H.ed back. Two seconds later, Danny did the same.

  They both plummeted to the floor.

  The ceiling was high. A good three meters higher than in a normal house. And beneath it lay sparkly white tiles laid over a solid concrete floor. Had Josh and Danny been a meter off to one side, they would have smacked onto the unforgiving tiles and broken several bones.

  Happily, they had been scurrying across the ceiling just above the FLUMPYWUMPY display. A round, shallow, plastic container rather like a large wading pool stood up on six sturdy legs at table height. It was filled with hundreds of Flumpywumpies … strange fluff-filled, glittery creatures that were all the rage among girls at school right now. If you pulled a string on a Flumpywumpy’s back, it would gurgle, “Flumpywumpy wuvvs you!”

  Danny and Josh hit the Flumpywumpies at great velocity, sending a shower of them into the air and over the edge of the display. Several of them told Josh and Danny they “wuvved” them—in spite of the crushing and the throwing.

  “Quick!” Josh hissed, scrambling through a multicolored cascade of Flumpwumpies and onto the floor. But as soon as he spoke, he knew something was wrong. His voice was all high and chirrupy—and his vision was astoundingly good. He could see all the detail of the My Tiny Horseys, half an aisle away. “Uh-oh!” he said, turning around to look at Danny. Danny was brushing several Flumpywumpies off his jeans and kicking more back under the display. Right up to his waist, he was back to normal. But above his waist he was still a gecko. Boy sized, but with gecko arms, hands, and fingers. He had a gecko chest and a gecko head covered in gleaming scales of shiny pink, with two dark, bulbous, orblike eyes.

  Danny turned and saw Josh a second later. “Oops,” he squeaked. He glanced into a mirror in the nearby Barbie display and then over to Josh again, feeling panic rise in
his chest. “We’ve got to get out of here!”

  There was a lot of noise over by the exit. Far, far too many people were around. Loads of little girls in sparkly dresses and tiaras were piling through the doors. Oh no, remembered Danny. The Damsels’ Party! But worse, off to their left, Danny could now see the security guard stalking along the top row of toy aisles. They were looking left and right, obviously searching for him and Danny. He might just recognize their jeans and running shoes! “We’re just going to have to make a run for it!” he squawked at his brother. And the pair of them set off, making for the doors.

  They expected screaming. A lot of it. Danny was hoping the fear and horror would mean the girls would just run away as they approached, clearing their path to the outside world. And true—there was a lot of squealing as they ran up to the doorway. But not the kind they expected. There were about fifteen or sixteen girls and half a dozen moms with them, along with a Princessland entertainer, dressed as a court jester, waving a stick with bells and being determinedly jolly. And as soon as the girls and their moms saw Josh and Danny, both still half-boy, half-gecko, they squealed … with DELIGHT!

  “Dragons! Oh look! They’ve got us DRAGONS!” squealed the damsels. And they fell upon Josh and Danny as if they were a basket of free Diddly DeeDees, giggling and cooing and stroking their heads.

  “Amazing costumes!” one of the moms said. “So lifelike!”

  Josh and Danny were appalled. They were surrounded by a crowd of damsels who were now pulling at their arms and dragging them across to the party area. This was a space right in the middle of Princessland, with lots of little glittery chairs laid out in a circle. Inside the circle was an assortment of girly fun—a large dolls’ house, a small fabric tent shaped like a pink castle, dozens of My Tiny Horseys pulling along pumpkin-shaped coaches with princess dolls in them, a hair-braiding table, a bracelet-making corner, and a face-painting stand … all laid out for a party.

  “Wait!” called a shrill voice. “I know what we’re going to do!” It was a girl with curly red hair, topped with a silver tiara, wearing a white frock with pink roses stitched all over it.

  “Melissa, sweetheart!” cooed her mom, just behind her. “We’re going to make bracelets and have face painting and hair braiding.”

  “NO!” shouted Melissa. “It’s MY party and I say we have a dragon FIGHT!”

  The rest of the girls whooped with excitement.

  “And this is MY dragon!” Melissa threw her arms around Danny. “Because he’s PINK! And that’s my favorite color! Who’s on my PINK dragon side?!”

  Several girls shrieked with approval and got behind Melissa, ready to cheer on the pink dragon.

  Another girl with long dark hair and a red dress claimed Josh. “OK—I’ll have the spotty dragon!” she sang—and the rest of the girls ran to be on her side.

  “My team against Lucy’s team!” declared Melissa, as the Princessland entertainer and the moms stood by helplessly. “Our dragons will FIGHT TO THE DEATH!”

  Josh and Danny stared at her. They were in Princessland, standing in between two crowds of damsels—and the damsels, with their rosebud dresses and tiaras and shiny ballet shoes … wanted them to FIGHT TO THE DEATH?! Danny felt a grudging admiration rise through him. These girls weren’t all bad, he decided.

  “Darling … that seems a bit … violent,” simpered Melissa’s mother.

  “Yes, it DOES, doesn’t it?” Melissa picked up a long baton from a nearby majorettes twirling sticks display. “Here you are, Pink Dragon! Go beat up the spotty dragon!”

  A high-pitched roar of approval went up, drowning out the Princessland entertainer’s protest. Then the dark-haired girl seized another twirling baton and handed it to Josh. “Bash his brains in, Spotty Dragon!” she urged. The batons were long, silvery sticks with heavy, sparkly balls on either end. As Josh and Danny took one each, they realized these could actually do quite a bit of damage.

  “We’ve got to get out of here!” hissed Josh, glancing all around for an escape route. But they were surrounded by girls—many of them linking arms as they stood whooping and cheering.

  “FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!” goaded Melissa.

  “Ah come on,” grinned Danny, gripping his baton and holding it out between both reptilian fists. “We might as well give them a show …”

  “TO THE DEATH!!!” Danny shrieked as he ran at Josh, holding the baton like a mace. It came out a bit high-pitched and chirrupy.

  Josh sighed and sidestepped his brother at the last second. But Danny was expecting that, and he swooped his baton to the left, whacking Josh in the middle of his scaly chest. There was a roar of approval from Melissa’s team.

  “Gah! Right! You ASKED for it!” squeaked Josh, spinning around and bringing his own baton up to whack Danny on the arm. Lucy’s team gave a shrill cry of approval and started chanting “FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!”

  Danny let off an angry chirp as the heavy, rounded end of Josh’s baton connected with his elbow—and he swung his baton around and thwacked his brother on the ribs.

  Then Josh got really angry and bit him. Hard. On the shoulder.

  “Yeeeow!” screeched Danny. “That’s dirty fighting!”

  “Oh yeah?!” grinned Josh, leaping from left to right as his brother tried to land another baton thump on him. “So, what are you going to do about it, Pinkie?!”

  Danny let out a cry of rage and threw himself on Josh, snapping his sharp teeth down hard on the back of Josh’s neck. Around them, the damsels were in a frenzy of cheering and chanting. And the moms were now trying to shout them down. The Princessland entertainer was waving his little jester’s stick around and calling for calm.

  Josh shook Danny off and then jumped onto his brother’s chest. He snapped his own sharp teeth on Danny’s shoulder. A moment later, they were rolling across the party circle floor, knocking over the friendship bracelets stand and sending an avalanche of beads across the tiles.

  Josh and Danny were having the times of their lives. They had never fought like this before. They’d scrapped often enough, of course—they were brothers. But a really full-on FIGHT like this? Never!

  If Josh hadn’t spotted the security guard and the store manager running toward the cacophony, things might have gotten more serious. But seeing Mr. Butch and the square-faced guard helped him remember who he was. And who Danny was and what they had been trying to do when they got caught up in the Damsels’ Party. ESCAPE! That’s what!

  Josh rolled into the pink castle-shaped tent, dragging Danny with him. He hoped desperately that he wasn’t about to make things even worse. Out of sight of the baying damsels, he pulled the S.W.I.T.C.H. spray out of his pocket for the third time. He squirted a bit at Danny and then at himself.

  Outside, the security guard was already pushing through all the screaming damsels and making for the doorway to the pink tent castle. He looked furious. He’d had more strife in one afternoon in Princessland than he’d ever had working with juvenile delinquents …

  But then he slid on a slick of friendship bracelet beads and shot across the floor. He shot into the face-paint stand. A large pot landed on his nose, daubing him with glittery yellow. All the damsels burst into fits of uncontrollable giggling.

  He struggled onto his knees and crawled toward the tent, growling with fury. But when he tore open the curtains at the tent doorway, he was once again confronted with nothing. Nobody there at all!

  “What is GOING ON?!!” he wailed, sinking back down to the floor. “I’ve been working too hard,” he told himself as his forehead thumped onto the floor. An orange flumpywumpy slid down his face. “I wuvv you!” it told him. He didn’t notice the leopard-skin and pink geckos shimmying up over his shoulder and shooting out of the castle tent window.

  There was a pillar near the pink castle. In fact, the structure had been tied up against it for extra stability. Danny and Josh shot up the pillar so fast that they were nothing more than a blur to anyone watching—and nobody was watching
. They were far too interested in seeing whether the big security guard was going to stop crying and come back out of the pink castle.

  Danny and Josh got outside the store in less than a minute and then shot into some shrubs that grew alongside it. They sat, motionless, waiting to S.W.I.T.C.H. back again. For several minutes, they said nothing. Danny licked his eyeballs once or twice. But other than that, they just kept still.

  Finally, Danny spoke. “That was … kind of weird.” The scales on his shoulder were sore and bruised, even though he’d S.W.I.T.C.H.ed back down to gecko size. The back of Josh’s neck was also covered in teeth marks. “Sorry, Josh. I really didn’t mean to bite you that hard.”

  “Yes, you did,” Josh said. “But so did I. Don’t feel too bad—we couldn’t help it.”

  “What do you mean?” Danny asked. He was feeling very guilty about the great glee with which he had attacked his twin just ten minutes ago.

  “We’re both geckos, and we’re both male,” explained Josh. “Female geckos can get along fine together. But male geckos can’t. They’re really territorial. And they quite often fight to the death.”

  Danny gulped.

  “It’s just as well that security guard came along,” Josh said. “I might’ve bitten your head off.”

  Danny smirked. “I’d like to see you try …”

  “DON’T!” Josh waved his gecko hand at Danny. “Seriously! DON’T! We mustn’t let that happen again. How will I explain it to Mom? She’ll ask where are you, and I’ll have to say I bit your head off. She won’t like it, you know.”