Mistakes We Make

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Mistakes We Make Page 24

by Jenny Harper


  ‘Been to see Logan?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘What did you think?’

  ‘About?’

  ‘How did he seem to you?’

  Molly eyed Adrienne cautiously. They had never been close and she was uncertain how to handle the question, so she parried it with another.

  ‘What’s your impression?’

  Adrienne’s face crumpled. It was the first time Molly had ever seen her display any kind of weakness. She caught Adrienne’s arm.

  ‘Sit down. Here.’ She guided her to the sofa and put an arm across her shoulder. ‘You’ll get through this. We all will.’

  Adrienne took out a tissue and dabbed at her eyes. ‘I know. Thank you.’ She smiled shakily. ‘I try not to let the boys see me like this. I try to be positive all the time, but it’s hard.’

  ‘I bet.’

  ‘Your dad’s fantastic. I couldn’t have survived without him.’

  Molly’s earlier moment of resentment at Adrienne’s presence in her home evaporated. ‘He loves having you here. It’s given him purpose.’

  ‘I know.’ Again there was a wry smile. ‘Thank heavens something positive has come out of this sorry mess. And if I’m honest, I’m loving working again too. Now that I look back on all those years I swanned around doing nothing, I can see they were pretty hollow. Being forced to fend for my boys has brought meaning to my life too.’

  How odd, Molly thought, that they should all turn full circle. Lives that had been empty were filled with new meaning, but her life, which had once seemed so satisfactory ... What did what she was doing signify?

  While Adrienne made coffee, she called Lexie, realising that she should have arranged to see her as soon as she’d known she was coming. She’d been too busy.

  There was no answer at The Gables. She tried her mobile. It was switched off. Perhaps she was painting. Keira might be with her grandmother. Maybe Lexie and Patrick were travelling.

  It occurred to Molly that she knew almost nothing about Lexie’s life these days. Once she would have known her friend’s every thought and feeling. The day the baby had been born ...

  She remembered every detail of that day, the hours of waiting and helping, of being needed, of excitement and nervous anticipation. That day, she had truly been whole.

  ‘Molly love, you’re here!’

  ‘Hello, Dad, hello, boys.’

  They arrived back from their walk glowing.

  ‘Look what I found!’ Alastair said, holding out his hand to reveal a dark feather. It shone, iridescent green and gold, in the sun streaming in the kitchen window.

  ‘It’s beautiful.’

  ‘Grandpa says it’s from a starling. I’m going to look it up.’

  Ian was not to be left out. ‘I found a pebble. Look.’

  She took it and closed her hand around it, enjoying its smooth warmth. ‘It’s very pretty, Ian. What a lovely shape.’

  ‘Grandpa’s got a book about stones and things. He’s going to help me iden ... idenny—’

  ‘Identify,’ Alastair scoffed.

  ‘That’s what I said.’

  Billy smiled. ‘Now, boys, let’s find the right books. Great to see you, Molly love.’

  ‘And you.’ She hugged him close. It was good to be here. ‘Listen, while you’re doing that, I’ll call the Travelodge down the road. You’re overflowing here.’

  ‘You will not. I’ll sleep on the sofa. It’s just one night.’

  ‘Don’t be silly, Dad.’

  Adrienne said, ‘There’s no problem. The boys can share my bed for one night. You and I can use their bunks.’

  Alastair groaned. Ian pulled a face, but gave Molly a cuddle.

  ‘I like it when you’re here, Auntie Molly,’ he said, looking oddly vulnerable.

  She put her arms round him. ‘And I like being here,’ she said, burying her face in his hair. ‘And most of all, I like seeing you.’

  That made Alastair want a hug too. They might be boys, all bravado and swagger, but underneath they must be bleeding. Their relationship with their father could take years to rebuild.

  Adrienne cooked supper, moving round the kitchen with ease and familiarity. Earlier, Molly had believed that Logan’s dishonesty had crowned no winners. Now she saw that that wasn’t true.

  ‘I’m exhausted,’ Adrienne yawned, ascending the ladder neatly and collapsing on the upper bunk. ‘Still, it’s good to keep busy, isn’t it?’

  By the time Molly had worked out a reply, she realised that all that could be heard from above her was the steady sound of the deep breathing of someone who was fast asleep.

  Chapter Eleven

  Molly flew back to London the next afternoon. Far from resolving the queries in her mind, the visit had opened up new issues.

  She called Julian as she joined the queue to get through security.

  ‘Hi, it’s me. Are you going to be in this evening?’

  ‘I was thinking of going out to a pub. I met a guy last night at a party – he’s pretty cool.’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘Did you have something in mind, sweetie?’

  ‘Never mind.’

  ‘I haven’t decided yet. I don’t have to go.’

  ‘Julian, I don’t want to get in the way of your happiness. Go,’ she said, not meaning it. She wanted Julian to be there. She needed a friend.

  She slipped the phone into her bag and rummaged around for her cosmetics. She was still a long way from the scanners – the queue snaked along and back, along and back several times, but it was moving quickly. She straightened up, and found herself staring right into the eyes of Sunita Ghosh.

  She looked away quickly. The last thing she needed right now was to have to talk to Adam’s girlfriend.

  The queue moved. Sending up a little prayer of thanks, she moved with it.

  Thirty yards further, she found herself doubling back, and half way along this length, she realised that it was inevitable that she’d pass Sunita again. She saw the dark, glossy hair approaching – six people away, five people, four – and had to make up her mind how to react. Ignoring her completely would be bizarre. Now there was just one head between them.

  She gave a small, quick smile. The queue moved raggedly on, and she was safely past.

  Molly felt the stress building. There was still one loop to go before the queues diverged, and there was no way they could pretend the coincidence hadn’t happened. She glanced ahead. An elderly couple, towing large cases, were deep in conversation. Behind her, two Japanese youths were chatting incomprehensibly. There was no chance of engaging anyone in conversation so that she could pass Sunita without having to acknowledge her existence.

  When they were next to each other, Sunita said, ‘Are you going back to London?’

  Molly nodded. ‘You?’

  ‘I’m off to London too. I’ve got a meeting first thing tomorrow morning.’

  ‘You don’t like the red-eye?’

  ‘I don’t mind, but I have to see my cousins. There’s some family business.’ She smiled, her teeth white and perfect. ‘There’s always family business.’

  ‘Tell me about it,’ Molly said, in heartfelt accord on this, at least.

  How long would they have to stand here like this? Thank God Adam wasn’t with her. That would have multiplied the embarrassment a hundredfold. She hadn’t spoken to Adam since Logan had been brought back to face justice. He’d be pleased about that, naturally, while Molly’s feelings at seeing her brother again were heavily tempered by the thought of the months that lay ahead while the case was being prepared for court, and the horror of all the publicity that was sure to follow.

  ‘Hope the flight’s not delayed,’ Sunita said. ‘What flight are you on?’

  ‘British Airways. You?’

  Molly’s heart sank. ‘British Airways too.’

  ‘See you, then.’

  ‘See you.’

  The queue moved and their paths diverged. Thank heaven.

  Molly was sitting
in one of the many cafés scattered around the airport when Lexie called.

  ‘Hi! Sorry we missed you. I didn’t know you were coming up; I thought you were far too busy.’

  ‘It’s just Tuesday that’s the problem, Lex. I did explain we have a critical pitch on Tuesday.’

  ‘Oh, that’s right. Listen, I’ve sorted that. Apparently you can have a proxy godparent; you don’t actually have to be there, so I’m arranging for Adam to be your proxy. That’s what I was doing yesterday.’

  ‘Adam’s going to be my proxy?’ Molly was shocked.

  ‘It’s only a formality, Molly. You’re the real godparent.’

  ‘But why Adam?’

  ‘I bumped into him when he was getting the last of his things out of the cottage. It seemed like a good idea. That’s all. Don’t read anything else into it.’

  ‘Oh.’ Exclusion was one thing, Adam being her substitute was quite another. ‘How is he?’ she managed to say.

  ‘He’s terrific. He’s moving into Forgie End Farm.’

  ‘Forgie End? His uncle’s farm?’

  ‘Yup. Didn’t you know?’

  ‘No, I didn’t. What’s he doing there?’

  ‘His aunt’s asked him to manage the place. She’s moved to one of the cottages, apparently. She’s had enough of farming; she just wants to keep hens and grow flowers. Can’t say I blame her. She is in her seventies, after all.’

  ‘What does Adam know about managing a farm?’

  Lexie laughed. ‘Nothing. But I imagine he’s a quick learner. Jean Blair will still be around and there are a few guys who’ve been working there for a while – they’ll keep him right. Anyway, you know how much he used to love that place as a boy, and he’d definitely had enough of law after Blair King went belly up.’

  Molly shuddered. ‘Don’t.’

  ‘Sorry. Listen, it’s hard for everybody. Adam’s still not over it, but he’s obviously thrilled that he’s got something else to do with his life. But that house is vast. He’s camping out in one room and the kitchen at the moment. I’ve told him he needs a woman to do the place up. I’m sure it’s got bags of potential, but there’s no way he’ll have time. Or the inclination, for that matter. Molly? Are you still there?’

  Molly cleared her throat. ‘I’m here.’

  ‘Sorry, was I being tactless?’

  ‘What about Sunita?’

  ‘Who? Oh, the Asian woman. The one we met at Loch Melfort? I believe that’s over.’

  Molly put her cup down because her hand had started to shake. ‘Is it? Why?’

  ‘Heavens, Molly, I don’t know Adam well enough to probe into stuff like that. Anyway, I told him to join some online dating agencies. He’ll never find anyone unless he does. He’s going to be stuck away in that place with precious little chance of socialising.’

  ‘Good idea.’

  ‘And what about you?’

  ‘What about me?’

  ‘Have you met anyone else? London must be full of yummy men with the same aims and ambitions as you.’

  ‘I imagine it is, but I’ve been too busy to find one. There’s Julian.’

  ‘Who’s Julian?’

  ‘My flatmate.’

  ‘The gay?’ Lexie laughed. ‘Great as a friend, I’m sure, but—’

  ‘He’s as much as I can cope with right now, believe me.’

  ‘Oh – I forgot to tell you.’

  ‘Tell me what?’

  ‘Patrick proposed. We’re getting married.’

  Molly yelped. ‘What? Oh my God! When did this happen?’

  ‘A couple of weeks ago. Mum had Keira overnight – the first time she’s done that. By the way, it went really well. She told me she’ll have her again any time—’

  ‘Lexie!’

  ‘Oh, sorry. I guess you’re not wanting all the details about my beloved daughter. I forget not everyone’s as besotted as we are. Yes, well, we left Keira with Mum and Patrick took me for a special meal at Martin Wishart’s in Leith, my all-time favourite restaurant, and he proposed.’

  ‘And you haven’t told me till now?’

  Molly felt desperately hurt. Once upon a time Lexie would have dashed off to the Ladies to text her there and then.

  ‘I didn’t realise I hadn’t. Sorry, Molly, honestly, but life’s just so hectic these days, what with Keira and the christening and everything. Aren’t you pleased?’

  ‘Course I’m pleased. I’m thrilled. Truly. You’ll be so happy.’

  ‘I know. I can’t believe it. All my dreams have come true. Except Jamie won’t be there, of course.’

  The grief Molly had felt when Jamie Gordon died had never left her, only now it had dulled to an ache that only surfaced on occasion. That whole period of her life now seemed unreal – not as though it had never happened, but shadowy and distant.

  Lexie cut in on her thoughts. ‘Listen, Molly, I know you won’t mind, but I can’t ask you to be a bridesmaid. It’s just that – well, you can have a proxy godmother, but you can’t have a proxy bridesmaid, can you? I mean, of course I hope you’ll be there, but I can’t take the risk. You do see, don’t you?’

  Molly tried to be brave. ‘Of course I do. Don’t worry about it. Who are you asking?’

  ‘Cora Spyridis, Patrick’s half sister. You remember her, don’t you.’

  ‘Of course I do. She ran The Maker’s Mark, where you had your big exhibition.’

  ‘She’s coming back from Greece for the wedding.’

  ‘When is it?’

  ‘Next month. The third Saturday. I know it’s really soon, but we’re just keeping it small. We don’t want anything fancy. There’s too much to do with Keira around, and anyway, neither of us wants that whole showy thing. We’re having the supper room at Fleming House, not the ballroom – that’s far too big. The guy who took over from you is organising everything. You will come?’

  ‘I’ll put it in my dairy in—’

  ‘Indelible ink.’ Lexie laughed. ‘I know you will.’

  Molly glanced up at the departures board above her head.

  ‘Heavens, I’ll have to run or I’ll miss my flight. I’m so pleased for you, Lexie, honestly.’

  ‘Thanks. Love you.’

  ‘You too. Bye!’

  She slid into her seat, her mind whirling. Adam was to be her proxy. Adam and Sunita had split up. He was going to manage Forgie End Farm – a new life was opening up for Adam and she was as far removed from it as she could possibly be.

  Lexie was getting married. And she was not going to be her bridesmaid. That hurt.

  ‘Hi again.’

  Molly looked up. Sunita was standing above her, smiling. ‘I think I’m in the window seat,’ she said, gesturing beyond Molly.

  ‘Sure.’

  Molly, who had been allocated the centre seat, prayed that the flight would not be full so that she could slide across to the aisle – but events today were conspiring against her, big time. It was only seconds before a very large man arrived and installed himself in the aisle seat, sweating profusely and moaning about the lack of space.

  ‘Good afternoon, everybody,’ came the voice over the intercom. ‘As we have a very full flight today, please ensure that all your luggage is installed safely in the overhead lockers or stowed neatly under the seat in front of you.’

  There was to be no respite.

  ‘So,’ Sunita said after take-off, the flawless smile perfectly in place, ‘how are things with you, Molly?’

  It was going to be a long flight.

  Later, talking to Julian – who had taken mercy on her and stayed in – Molly confessed.

  ‘I know it’s uncharitable of me, but I can’t help being glad they’ve split up.’

  ‘Darling, if you need to bitch, I’m absolutely the right man to bitch to.’

  She grinned. Julian was the most perfect companion in the world.

  ‘It’s not that I wish either of them ill, and actually, the flight wasn’t nearly as bad as I’d expected – she’s very bright an
d quite easy to talk to. I just can’t get the fact out of my head that she was there with him, at Loch Melfort, that time I went there with Lexie.’

  ‘And what was so wrong with that? Have another olive.’

  ‘She was absolutely like a fish out of water, with her high-heeled gold sandals and her shimmering dresses. Loch Melfort’s a place for outdoor pursuits – you know, hill walking, climbing, sailing, all that stuff.’

  Julian shivered. ‘My worst nightmare. I’m with Sunita. Anyway,’ he refilled their glasses, ‘I’m not buying your story. It was really none of your business, was it, whether she looked out of place there or not? That was Adam’s problem. In fairness, he probably didn’t even see it as a problem. You said she’s stunning.’

  ‘Flawless bloody skin, thick, shiny hair, eyes like a roe deer’s and pearly white teeth,’ Molly said gloomily.

  Julian took her hand. ‘You’re not so desperately ugly yourself, dearest Mollykins. Now, forgive me if I’m wrong – I’m only a man so I know nothing – but dare I suggest you were a teensy-weensy bit jealous?’

  Molly snatched her hand away. ‘Not in the slightest. My marriage, as you once so clearly pointed out, is over.’

  ‘Ah. But are you still in love with him?’

  ‘No! Maybe a little. Well, what if I am? It won’t do me the slightest good. Now,’ she emptied her glass in three quick gulps and held it out for a refill, ‘you mentioned you’d met a man. I want to hear all about it – every gory detail.’

  Chapter Twelve

  The tin labelled ‘Summer Camp Fund’ was still very much on Caitlyn’s mind. It was an impossibly large sum for Isla May to have; she couldn’t imagine how the money had got there. She waited for the right moment and sat Isla May and Ailsa down.

  ‘There’s something I have to talk to you both about,’ she said.

  ‘That sounds serious,’ Ailsa said, laughing.

  Ailsa had changed her hairstyle recently. It only fell to her shoulders now, instead of half way down her back, but it was stylish and sleek. It made her look more grown up. She almost was grown up. The night of Ricky’s attack had been a turning point – or perhaps that had come earlier and Caitlyn hadn’t noticed. Either way, dating Wallace had definitely improved her sister.

 

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