by Liz Schulte
I was wrong. It was titled Orion, but a quick glance showed it wasn’t anything more than basically calling his spirit into a mirror to answer questions. I flipped the page. Bingo.
“Orion’s Door.” Terrick drummed his hands on the page. “You are a genius.”
“I know,” I said, but I was smiling because holy hell we’d done it. “You’re not so bad yourself.”
“How do we know this is the right spell though?”
I looked at it. It was clear what she intended the spell to be, but somewhere in casting it, things went wrong. “We figure out if the spell was bad or if she did something wrong in the set up,” I said.
The spell was far from simple. It was more math than magic.
“Did you find something?” Angel asked.
“Just the spell, yeah buddy.” He fist bumped her. “Can you grab the astrological charts from the wall?” Terrick leaned back and snatched the physics and mathematics books from the low shelf closest to us. “This is my kind of magic,” he said.
I laughed. “Better you than me then. You got this?”
He nodded, waving me away.
I stood up, stretching out the kinks in my legs and arms. As soon as Alexis was settled into sorting each item in the room and accessing it for magical value (the new task Selene assigned her group when Frost left with Olivia), I caught my coven’s attention. One by one, each of them came over.
“I’m worried about Frost,” I whispered when we were all together.
“Me too,” Leslie said immediately. “I can’t get a read on her at all.”
“Ever since she walked through the door, she has looked resigned. I’ve seen that look before,” I said.
“Where?” Selene asked.
“On you,” Katrina said, her face as worried as I felt. “She’s going to sacrifice herself.”
I nodded and Leslie looked more hurt than surprised.
“Why?” Selene asked. “There are other options. We have Olivia. I know, I know, I’m one to talk, but I had my reasons. I had to fix all the things that went wrong because of me. It totally snowballed and there was nothing I could do about it. Frost isn’t the cause of this.”
Leslie shook her head. “I doubt she feels like that. You guys haven’t been here. The family stuff hits her deep. When she talks about it, I can feel how her wounds never healed. She may not have caused it, but her mother did and she might be doing this for her. Orion might’ve even brought her here for this reason. Everything has kind of led to this point.”
“Who is this Orion person? I’m still confused as to how he is involved in everything,” Katrina said.
“He was her spirit guide in the meditation and he left her the presents. He’s also sort of hot and totally into Frost—or would be if she’d stop pushing him away. But none of that is important right now. The important part is, if he is pushing her to make amends for what her mother did, I don’t think she would fight it.”
Selene’s chin went to a stubborn angle. “Okay, so if we know her plan, then all we need to do is come up with our own plan to counter hers.”
“Should we tell the others?” Katrina asked. “I mean they are here and they are working on all of this too.”
We all nodded. “I’ll check on Frost and Olivia. You guys fill them in,” I said.
I stepped out of the room and walked quietly toward the kitchen, listening for voices. I didn’t hear anything at all. When I poked my head into the kitchen, two sets of eyes were waiting for me.
“Hey, Jessica. How have you been?” Olivia asked, raising her eyebrow in a way that reminded me of her significant other, Holden.
“Hey.” I waved. “Just came out for a drink. Pretend like I’m not here.”
Neither of them spoke while I was in earshot—and probably wouldn’t, so I devised a new strategy. From everything Leslie had said about Orion, he was the creator of this ridiculous winter storm… . I went out on the porch with my bottle of water.
“Hey, Orion,” I said into the night, not knowing if that was how to call him or not, but I didn’t really have magical choices these days.
The wind kicked up. “How can I be of service?” a man’s voice came from the darkness.
“You can stop filling my friend’s head with ideas about sacrificing herself for starters. Don’t you think she has been through enough? When will you people leave her alone? She isn’t a toy for you to play with.”
He stepped into view. “I have as much control over what Frost does or does not do as you do. I simply present her with information.”
“That’s bullshit. You spoon fed her and then manipulated her emotions until you were sure she’d make the choice you wanted her to make. Aren’t you supposed to be on her side? What do you get out of this?” I crossed my arms, glaring at him.
A stronger gale went right through me and then he was gone.
Of all the girls, Frost was the last one I expected to do something foolish over a man. I went back into the house. Frost and Olivia were still quietly talking, so I ducked back through the red door where all the witches were finally working together instead of bickering.
“Good, you’re here. Are they still busy?” Selene asked.
I nodded. “Yeah. I can’t hear what they’re saying, but they’re talking in the kitchen. Do you have a plan yet?”
“Maybe,” Leslie said, looking doubtful.
“We have one,” Alexis said.
My coven didn’t look overly excited about whatever it was.
“So if Frost is planning to use herself as bait,” Aisha said. “I think we need to go along with it because that makes the most sense. The angel wants her, not any of the rest of us. So anyway, once he has her and starts to strangle her, Terrick will cause an explosion that will startle him and Selene,” she gave a questioning look as she said the name and Selene nodded, “will push him through the door with her telekinetic ability. Then the rest of us will seal the door.”
“How?” I asked. “We found the spell to open it, but is there anything on closing it other than Frost’s blood?”
“No, but we’ll have her blood because she will still be there,” Angel said.
“Unless an explosion isn’t enough to startle an angel,” Katrina said. “There’s not really a lot of room for error. Like Selene can’t wait to see if he’s startled. She’ll have to assume it and act, or she’ll miss the opportunity to knock him through. But if he isn’t…”
“Both of them will go through,” Selene said, tugging on the ends of her hair.
“Does anyone have a better idea?” Dom asked, stretching his legs out straight in front of him. “Olivia is the angel of death. Why can’t she just do her thing?” I asked. “I get it that Frost wants to do this herself, but we don’t have to go along with that. Olivia can just transport him back to hell officially, and then he won’t be able to return.”
“Actually we do,” Leslie said. “This is just one more bad guy for us, but that’s not what he is to Frost. He represents much more. We can’t take this away from her. I don’t want her to die, but I do think she needs this. Her life has sort of been in limbo. This could change everything for her.”
“But she has to live for that to happen.” I threw up my arms. I was really tired of people dying.
“I’m sure she doesn’t want to die. She thinks it’s the only way. She also thinks no one will want to risk themselves to save her—so let her fight the angel and we can fight for her.”
I rubbed a hand over my face and searched my mind for anything that would be sure to distract a fallen angel, but it wasn’t like we could wave something shiny in the air and he’d lose his shit. This was a being I couldn’t even fully wrap my mind around. “For the record, I hate this plan.”
Even the other coven didn’t look super excited about it, but any plan was better than no plan.
“How are you guys at casting without a circle? Silent casting? And ad libbing when everything goes wrong?” Selene asked. “Because I can tell you righ
t now, it’s going to. I’ve never been in a fight where anything goes as planned.”
“I can cast without a circle or speaking,” Alexis said. Terrick and Aisha nodded.
“I can only shapeshift like that and Angel can’t do it either,” Dom said.
“Okay.” I leaned over the notebook in the center of the circle and Katrina tossed me a pen. I drew a picture of the room with my extremely questionable drawing skills. “Then you guys will be in the back with me. We’ll make a protective circle that we cannot break no matter what happens out there.” I drew a circle against the wall opposite of the door and looked at them until they nodded.
“Frost will be in front with the angel,” Leslie said and I made an “X” for Frost and an “A” for the angel by the door.
We all stared at the paper as if it could show us our future, but it couldn’t. Devin could have though. For about the millionth time since I killed her, I wished she was here. “Divination,” I said to myself then looked up at Aisha. “You can do that, right? That’s what you said. Have you had any feelings or visions about this?”
She shook her head. “I don’t get visions. Not yet. But I could try to cast a spell that looks to the future.”
“Do it,” Selene said. “Even if it doesn’t work, we haven’t lost anything trying.”
“Okay.” I thumped my fist against my forehead three times as I tried to play this out in my mind. “Selene is the strongest so let’s put her front and center. Alexis and Terrick have the next most active abilities so they can flank her. You guys are in charge of distraction. Alexis can set a fire and Terrick can blow something up. The bigger we can make it without burning down the house the better.” I wrote them all in.
“The next row will be Leslie and Kat. They might not have showy powers, but they pack a hell of a punch these days.” They both nodded. “Aisha, I’m going to put you between them and the protective circle in back. So basically we will be in an inverted pyramid formation. Does that benefit us in anyway?”
“No,” Selene said.
“What if we try this?” Leslie took the pen from me and flipped the page. She fanned everyone out from Frost, starting with Selene on her right and Terrick on the left, then Alexis and Kat and Leslie and Aisha. Finally she ended with the protective circle in the center of the triangle so the formation looked like the all-seeing eye.
Selene nodded. “I like that better.”
“Me too,” I said. “How are you coming on the spell?” I asked Terrick.
“Still working out the math. I’m close though.”
“If Olivia is going to help us get the angel here, then all that’s left to do is clear out the cellar and set up what we need,” Leslie said.
And just like that we were barreling toward another battle with an uncertain end.
19
FROST
The parade of people stomping through the house and out the front door was hard to miss. They must have figured out something while I was talking to Olivia. The more I spoke with her, the more comforting she was. She didn’t rush me or push me. She didn’t even ask questions, probably because she already knew the answers.
She was just so easy to talk to. I told her everything. It spilled from me as if a cap had been removed. I told her about growing up, about meeting Sy and then the coven, about my mother and about what I thought versus what might have been. I even told her about Corbin and Orion. She listened to all of it with no sympathy or pity on her face, just peaceful acceptance.
“So you see why it has to be me who takes care of this?” I finished.
She drew in a deep breath. “I see that doing this yourself will bring you peace, but the question remains, is peace what you are looking for?”
“What do you mean?”
“You are young, Frost. There is still so much life left before you. You must ask yourself if it is too soon to accept that the purpose of your life is not still of your choosing. You were not born to correct the sins of another. Perhaps you were born to forge your own path.”
I crossed my legs beneath me in the chair. “I can’t explain why, but I feel like this is what I need to do. That’s not saying I’m not scared as hell, because I am. Death has always frightened me. But,” I shook my head, “so does living like this for the rest of my life. I have been at war with what I am since the day I was born. At least now I can use my power in a way of my choosing.”
Olivia nodded. “Then your decision is made and you do not need me.”
“Wait,” I said before she could leave. “How do we get him here?”
“Pray,” she said.
“It can’t be that easy.” Nothing was ever that easy.
She nodded. “And that hard.” She put a hand over mine. “Good luck. I’ll be watching.”
Despite everything I thought I would feel when the grim reaper told me she was watching me, I felt comfort. “I’m glad it will be you,” I said.
Olivia nodded, but I couldn’t read her expression before she faded from the room.
I was alone in my mother’s house for the first time ever. All day someone had been here with me, but now it was just me and the house that would never be a home. It was sort of like me in all the things it would never be.
I glanced at the star light box that Orion had intended to give me as a child. So sentimental. Granted he never actually gave it to me until it was too late, but the thought was still there. I noticed a notepad in the center of the table and couldn’t remember seeing it before. I pulled it over to me and a pen rolled off to the side. There was a note on the top sheet.
“Even if you can’t speak the words, tell the people in your life what they meant to you.” It was signed “—O.”
Olivia, of course. I tore off the top page and stared at it. I had no idea where to even begin, but the advice felt right. I took a deep breath and put my pen to the paper, but nothing came to me. My mind was perfectly blank. Then the single most obvious choice popped into my mind.
Leslie,
I’m sure you guys have already figured out my plan. You’ve been here through all of this and above anyone else I probably owe you an explanation the very most, but I’m not going to give it to you. Okay, so this might be the worst goodbye letter ever written, but just because I’m going to die doesn’t mean I have to change everything about myself. So instead of being mushy, which you are probably already crying too much to take, I am just going to tell you what needs to be said.
So stop crying.
Stop it.
Okay, first off let me start with saying I was lucky to have met you and the rest of the coven, but especially you. You made me feel like I could really be one of you someday and that wasn’t something I experienced often in my life. You also were pushy and determined to help me whether or not I wanted it which was both annoying and the best thing you could have possibly done. Never change anything about yourself for anyone.
I guess what I am really trying to say is you were my friend even if I didn’t always show it. Thank you for that. I will miss you the most.
Love,
Frost
The next one was also an easy choice, and words (maybe not the right words, but words nevertheless) came easily.
Sy,
I don’t think I ever said it out loud, but thank you. You did more for me than you could possibly ever know. The day you found me hiding in the alley was the first time my life had ever changed for the better.
I really am okay with the decision I made, but the one part that gives me any hesitation in all of this is that I am disappointing you. For a long time that was the single thought that got me through the bad days when I really did just want to stop trying to do what was right and instead do what was easy. But I owed you more than that.
So you see, it wasn’t just the fact that you were in the right place at the right time. You actually made me want to be more than what I was. In a lot of ways the person you knew was as much my creation as I was yours. Only you were the one responsible for
the best parts of me and I never have forgotten it.
No matter what happens or where I end up, I will always remember that. You have the best heart of anyone I have ever met. Never stop taking in us strays. We need you.
Love,
Frost
Tears streamed down my cheeks. This was harder than I thought it would be. I wrote to the rest of the coven members individually, then a collective letter to the coven I never got to know. I had already said goodbye to Orion in person, so there was no one else left to write to. Or no one else who was still alive. I lifted the pen again.
To the mother I have never known,
I don’t know why I am writing this other than you left me a letter and even though my letter will never reach you, writing it seems somehow important in the eleventh hour.
There are a lot of things I always wished I could tell you. Things like you ruined my life. You had to be the most selfish, uncaring, unlovable woman who ever walked the face of the earth to justify my complete and utter hatred for you. There were so many times I wished I hadn’t been born. So many times I would have given anything for you to be there so you could wrap your arms around me and tell me everything was going to be okay. But you weren’t and it wasn’t.
Now I am finishing what you started. Once again robbing myself of the life I should have had, but this time I go a little more in peace. I can see the dilemma you faced now more clearly than I ever could before. It doesn’t excuse your choice or soften the impact of that decision on my life, but now I understand.
So from a daughter to a mother I will never speak to, I may not have the strength in me to forgive you, but wherever you are, you should know that despite everything I have always loved you.
Frost
I tri-folded each letter and wrote the recipient’s name on the outside. I removed the key from around my neck, unlocked Orion’s box, and placed each letter inside. I was about to turn the key to relock it when another idea hit me, making me smile.
I took one last sheet of paper.
Corbin,
You never did kill me. Kiss my ass.
Frost
There. Now I was really done. I locked the box and left the skeleton key lying on top of it where someone would find it after all was said and done.