The dishes in my dad’s hands rattled. “How awful.”
Faith pulled out a pad of paper and pen from her purse. “What resources do we have?”
“Two ghosts who can’t get close to the villain, a sick hero, and three young Wakers,” Brent said. “I am obviously playing the part of the hero.”
“Of course you are, Handsome.” I gave Brent a quick kiss on the cheek before diving back into the conversation. “I refuse to believe there haven’t been other Crosbys before, people who’ve upset the spirit world.” I tilted my chair back so it rested on two legs. “But I’ve been through my whole Waker journal and didn’t find anything.”
“Did you look through your grandma’s?” Faith asked. “I’ve gone through my mom’s, and there’s stuff in there that the rest of the council doesn’t know about. It might be the same for you.”
“I can’t do that.” My dinner churned in my gut at the thought of invading Vovó’s privacy like that. “She’s still alive.”
“But she isn’t a Waker anymore, at least not the one she used to be.” Faith touched my shoulder. “I’m sorry, but she can’t lead your line anymore.”
“I know,” I said around the sudden lump in my throat.
Faith twisted a strand of hair around her finger. “You need to read them. It’s our best chance to find an answer. You’re a different person than your grandma, with your own experiences, and you might see something she missed.” Faith slid her chair closer to the table, resting her elbows on it. “It wouldn’t be wrong for you to read her journals. Kalina has seen that you’re the next in line to lead.”
Kalina swiveled toward me. “It’s true. I understand exactly how you feel, but you have to do it. I felt horrible reading my mom’s, but it was time for me to take over the reins. The same goes for you. It’s your time.”
I dug my nail into one of the fork marks in the table and hunched my shoulders. Being called out as Vovó’s successor not only humbled me, but reminded me how inadequate I was for this job. I thought I had years to train. I never expected it to be thrust upon me now.
“You should have the ascension ceremony, to officially become the new Matriarca.” Faith said. “You’ll be stronger that way.”
“I haven’t even thought about that. I wouldn’t know how.” My eyes flickered between Kalina and Faith. “And I’m not ready. There’s no way I’m ready to lead.”
Faith reached across the table and touched my hand. “I don’t think anyone ever feels ready. I didn’t.”
“Me either.” Kalina placed her hand on top of Faith’s. “But when the time comes you need to step up.”
“How?” I rubbed my hands on my jeans. “Am I supposed to do something? I thought it just happened.”
“It doesn’t. Your grandma should’ve written you a letter as soon as she knew you were the next in line. That letter is key for you to come into your power. I know how to perform the ascension ceremony.” Kalina let out a puff of air. “I can do it for you right now.”
My mouth went dry. “Right now?”
Kalina nodded. “No time like the present.”
I wanted to run upstairs and hide under the covers, curled in the fetal position.
I hadn’t called this meeting so I could replace my grandma. The expectations, the reality of what they wanted, felt like I’d been trapped in a riptide, unable to break free from the current dragging me under.
Brent hugged me to him and kissed my forehead. His calming presence was the only thing keeping me from running from the weight of this moment. Everyone in the room stared in silence, waiting for my answer.
Finally my dad spoke up. “It’s what she’d want, Yara; you know it.”
And that is what finally gave me the courage to wordlessly nod.
Kalina snapped into action. She rose from the table and started handing out orders. “Go, get your grandma’s Waker journals. Do you know where she keeps them?”
I nodded again and stood, making my way towards Vovó’s room in a daze. I knocked before poking my head in, but my grandma wasn’t there. The warm, welcoming room felt like a safe cocoon as I stepped inside.
In here, her presence was strong enough to fortify me to do what I needed to do, to be the successor she expected.
Ignoring the prickling of guilt for going through her things, I moved to the cedar chest at the foot of her bed, knelt beside it, lifted the lid, and inhaled the smell of cedar and her orchid perfume, the scent giving me a moment of calm. Under a worn blanket and several photo albums, I found her journals.
I reached toward the books and then pulled my hands back, hesitating, knowing this moment would lead to something that would change me forever. I swallowed hard and sweat broke out at the base of my skull. After the ceremony, the Yara I’d been would never be the same.
Words my grandma always threw around like ‘destiny’, ‘fate’, and ‘calling’ sucker punched me and I sank back onto my knees, lightheaded. And yet, despite the panic fermenting in my stomach, a sense of peace doused the fear. Something in me knew this was right.
After a steadying breath, I picked up the thinner of the two journals, its leather worn and spine creased with age, then picked up the other as well. I’d always assumed Vovó would give her Waker journals to one of her sisters, the one who would be our next leader. To have it be me who would inherit her calling and powers didn’t seem possible. And yet, it was.
Closing the cedar chest, I cradled the journals close and reverently carried them back to the living room. I placed them both on the end table, next to the Tiffany lamp.
“We’ll need the Matriarca journal. Open it to the last page,” Kalina instructed.
My fingers ran along hand-stitched cover one more time as I picked it up and opened it to the last page. Inside the back cover, a paper pocket held a yellowed envelope with my name scrawled on it in Vovó’s handwriting. I reached for it, but Kalina held her hand out for it.
“Not yet. It’s for the ceremony,” she explained as I handed it over.
My dad helped Vovó to the living room and sat her in a plush armchair. I positioned a folding chair across from her, close enough that I could hold her hand.
Vovó’s forehead wrinkled and she straightened her glasses as she glanced around the room. “What’s going on?”
“It’s a ceremony that passes on a legacy from you to me.” I licked my lips deciding how to frame my answer. “It’s like you’re giving me your blessing to be your heir.”
I could see lingering questions in Vovó’s eyes, but she nodded. “Tudo bem. I’d be proud to call you my heir.”
“She doesn’t have to be here for this,” Kalina said quietly. “But I knew it would mean a lot to you if she was. I had my mom at mine.”
I gave her a wobbly grin and squeezed Vovó’s hand. “Good call.”
Faith came from the direction of Vovó’s room, with my mom trailing behind her, each carrying various jars. Among the contents, I could identify sage, pankurem, sweet grass, and almonds. Faith took the jars one by one and combined them all in a bowl, then ground them into a paste. Kalina and my mom lit candles. I didn’t know what all of them were, but I smelled vanilla and lavender.
Faith scooped some of the paste she’d made onto her fingers and applied it to my temple and Vovó’s. My grandma startled a bit at the touch, but gave Faith a kind smile.
“It smells nice,” Vovó said.
“Thank you.” Faith returned to the coffee table and brought the bowl with her. “Can you each place your left hand in the bowl.”
Vovó paused, searched my face for something, and then dipped her hands into the gooey substance. I dipped my hand into the surprisingly warm mixture and took Vovó’s hand in mine.
“Good,” Faith said. “I was just going to tell you to do that.”
With our hands wrapped around each other’s, a small spark, like static electricity burst between our clasped palms. Steam lifted from the bowl, but the mixture itself didn’t heat more.
Ka
lina opened the envelope I’d found in Vovó’s journal and cleared her throat.
“Yara, I do not know when the time will come for me to pass on the role of Matriarca, but when it happens, I do so with complete faith in you. You were meant to help unite the lines, to bring back what was lost and to bring light in the darkness.”
Even though Kalina spoke, she sounded exactly like my grandma, as if Vovó were reading it out loud. Vovó jerked her head toward Kalina; she must have heard it too.
“This is the calling you were born to accept. All my love, your Vovó.”
Faith handed Kalina a jar full of dried herbs, which she sprinkled over Vovó.
“Protector of the spirits, leader of the line, the time has come for the responsibility to be transferred.” Kalina’s words were soothing, relaxing. They carried like a melody into my ears.
The herbs lifted from Vovó’s shoulders, hair and clothes and flowed onto me. They coated my eyelashes, tickled my nose, and dusted my shoulders and hands.
The world paused.
In the silence, a warm golden light opened between Vovó and me. A woman who some part of me recognized appeared. I tilted my head, considering her. Her coal black hair rippled to her waist as she moved near me, the curls framing her face. I’d seen her before. Somewhere.
“We’ve waited for you, Yara. You shall be the first full Waker since me.” With a smile that reached her hazel eyes and warmed my soul, she stretched out and touched one finger to the middle of my forehead.
Questions formed on my tongue. Who was she? What did she mean? But in a heartbeat she vanished.
Shock coursed through me as the world unfroze.
My parents cuddled together on the love seat, Faith and Janette stood near the TV, DJ paced the edge of the room, and Brent sat on the edge of the coffee table, his head down and his eyes closed. Kalina spoke words that I didn’t fully comprehend.
Vovó stared at me with peaceful eyes. She breathed out and a fine white mist clung to the expunged air, gliding toward me, blowing into my eyes. I gasped and the air slipped inside my mouth, sliding down my throat.
A sudden burning surged in my heart, a ringing echoed in my ears, my eyes watered and a punishing force pressed against my chest and down on my shoulders, making it impossible to breathe. For a moment I thought the weight would crush me.
The strain of the load moved down, through me, settling into me, seeping into my bones, and I could breathe again. It no longer felt heavy or foreign, but integral, like tissue and fiber.
Kalina spoke faster now, her voice growing in pitch and pace. The words seemed to change as they sprang from her lips, transforming from syllables to musical notes, creating an orchestra that swirled around us. Faster and higher the music swelled until it crashed together in a startling crescendo of cymbals, a beat of silence and then, a final note, like the deep soothing bass of a cello that reverberated around me and faded slowly with the magic of the moment.
“It’s done,” Kalina said, leaning against the edge of the couch.
My chest heaved, battling for air. I hadn’t even realized I’d been breathing hard. Faith handed me a towel. Removing my hand from the bowl, I cleaned it, took my grandma’s hand, and helped clean her fingers as well.
Tears streaked Vovó’s smiling face. Some part of her must have understood the sanctity of the ceremony. “Incrível. What was that?”
I didn’t know how to answer without telling her everything, and I wasn’t sure she was ready for that yet. Instead I hugged her tight, trying to infuse all of my love into that one hug. Vovó patted my back before pulling away. Her features seemed lighter, more carefree than they had before, and I realized her previous burdens of leadership had become mine.
Tears in her eyes, my mom helped Vovó up. My grandma stood, waved goodbye to everyone, and headed towards her room.
I stared after her, wanting to talk to her, wishing she truly understood the enormity of what had just happened. Brent knelt beside my chair and I turned toward him.
“That . . . wow, Yara. To be connected to you while that happened, it was incredible.” Brent knelt beside my chair and I turned toward him. His fingers traced my cheekbones and brushed the hair from my face. “I felt this sense of well being and almost suffocating responsibility, but also this overwhelming feeling of destiny, too, that you were meant to do this. It kinda blew my mind.”
I smiled. Vovó might not understand, but Brent had. More than I expected. “You felt all that?”
He nodded as he took my hand in his and kissed it. “Yeah. How do you feel?”
I took stock of myself, waiting, searching for the power, strength, and wisdom I expected to find. “I feel fine, but exactly the same. I’m not sure it worked.”
“Did it?” I looked from Faith, to Kalina, to Janette.
They all nodded. Kalina whistled. “Oh, yeah. The spark when the two of you held hands? And the musical accompaniment? I’ve never seen that before.”
Brent kissed my forehead, right where the lady who had appeared had touched me. She’d surprised me. I knew I’d seen her before, more than once even, but I couldn’t place her. Was she a ghost? How had she slipped through our wards?
“The lady who appeared during the ceremony? Who was she? I can’t figure out where I know her from.”
Janette and Faith appeared confused. Kalina looked at me like I was crazy.
“What lady?” Faith asked.
No one else had seen her? How was that possible, in a room full of spirits and Wakers?
I tried to describe her, but I couldn’t seem to remember any details of her appearance. I would bring her image to mind and it would slip out of my grasp like wet soap. She’d also said something. It had felt important, but I couldn’t remember the words. I shook my head in frustration. Why couldn’t I remember? The harder I tried to imagine her face and words, the fuzzier they became.
Finally, I sighed. “Never mind.”
Kalina clenched her hands and worked her jaw, like she wanted to say something, but she shuddered and turned toward Faith. That was odd. I was about to ask what was wrong, but then Janette smiled at me.
“Everyone’s Ascension Ceremony is unique, Yara.”
That felt like a sympathetic pat on the head, but I offered her a small grin anyway.
My dad lifted me from the chair and captured me in a strong embrace. “I’m so proud of you, Queridinha. I’m honored to have witnessed that.”
“But I didn’t do anything. I don’t feel any different.”
“Didn’t you feel the rush of power, like you were bursting out of a shell?” Faith asked.
“Uh, no. Was that supposed to happen?”
Faith and Kalina exchange uneasy glances. Great. I’d failed again.
“It did work, but you won’t feel anything until you fully accept the changes in yourself,” Janette said. “Until you believe you can use the power, and that you deserve it.”
My heart dropped to the floor. That day might never come.
“Okay, now move it to the table,” Brent instructed.
I concentrated on the bowling ball that hung in the air, guiding it to hover above the patio table.
“Now lower it. Gently.”
No pressure. If I dropped it too fast, I would only shatter my parent’s new table. Sweat dripped down my back, along my forehead. My eyes narrowed as the ball followed my outstretched arm, descending an inch at a time until it settled onto the table with a soft thud.
“I did it!” I jumped in the air and pumped my fist.
Brent put his arms around my waist. “Great job!”
“It felt different today.” We were both sweaty, but I didn’t care. I leaned against him, my back to his chest. “Like some switch had been thrown inside me and I understood how to communicate with the air.”
Brent gathered my hair in his hands. “Same with the earth and water training you’ve had me do.”
DJ appeared beside us. “I thought something like that might happen after the b
inding ceremony. You’ve each picked up the other’s talents. And I have too. Watch.” DJ reached out and pushed the ball with his ghostly finger, making it move. “I can make contact with physical things. I could sometimes move things before, but it took a lot of energy. Now it’s easy. I could even do some of Brent’s wind tricks earlier.”
I grabbed my water bottle from the table and took a large drink. “So you’re like a ghost on steroids?”
“It’s not steroids, Cupcake; this is all natural skill.” DJ waggled his eyebrows. “You’ve gotten stronger as well. Haven’t you noticed?”
“I have felt stronger,” Brent said, catching the water bottle I tossed at him.
DJ quirked his head to the side. “Did you just respond to me?”
Brent grinned. “I can see and hear ghosts too.”
“That’s something Crosby won’t be expecting. Can you touch them like Yara can?”
“Huh, I don’t know.” Brent stepped forward slowly. “Don’t try to be solid; just be a normal ghost.”
“Dude, there ain’t nothing normal about me.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yes, you’re a supreme being.”
DJ winked. “And don’t you forget it.”
“Whatever. Let’s try this out.” Brent high fived DJ’s raised hand, and the crack of flesh slapping flesh could easily be heard. “Whoa. That’s awesome.”
DJ shook out his hand and glared at Brent who gave him a thumbs up.
“Crosby won’t be expecting that either,” I said. “But be careful, Brent. That means spirits can hurt you now.”
Brent lips thinned. “They can try.” He clapped his hands together. “Let’s get some training in and get a feel for these new skills.”
Even though he’d never admit it, I knew Brent needed a break. Ever since our ceremony, I had felt closer to Brent, more in tune with his emotions. Maybe it should have freaked me out, but it didn’t. Instead, I felt whole, complete in a way that I never had before. And because of that connection, I knew he’d been feeling horrible, but I wanted to know how bad it was.
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