His endearing smile appeared, making her breath catch in her throat. Would she ever be able to control his effect on her?
“Yes I am, thanks to you and Grandma.” He squeezed her hand before raising it to his lips.
Caroline’s arms erupted in gooseflesh. “Hezekiah is the one who did the hardest work. I still marvel at the way he carried you to Vicksburg after you were shot.”
“I freed him, you know, before he brought me back. Hezekiah will never have to answer to anyone except God for his decisions.”
“I’m so glad.”
His smile was warm. “That’s only the first of the many improvements I intend to make upon my return.”
“I can hardly wait.” Her stomach shifted, prompting her to change the subject. “I have something important to tell you.”
“Your confession is not important. Not until I tell you something very important.”
Caroline’s heart sped up. Was he about to declare his love? Why now? Why could he not have said something days earlier?
“I was teasing you earlier, but I want you to know how much I admire the bravery you showed while I was too sick to protect you and Grandma. I’m very proud of the way you stood up to an army of Yanks.”
Blood rushed to her cheeks. Caroline tried to pull her hand free, but Luke kept it imprisoned. Where were the words of love she was expecting? “I don’t deserve your esteem. I was nearly too frightened to get the first word out.”
The whole world seemed to slide away as their glances met. She could not look away. She was lost in the depths of his dark gaze. Silence filled the room, and time ground to a halt.
“You are very courageous, my dear. One of God’s many blessings in my life.”
Caroline closed her eyes for a moment, a conflict raging inside her as violent as any battlefield. She wanted to revel in the happiness of this moment, but she could not. She might have his admiration now, but did Luke love her? Or was he still in love with the girl from Tennessee? The memory of his words the day he discovered her and Dinah returned, forming a wall between them.
She thought she’d buried her pain. Perhaps she had…and watered it, too. Because it had grown into a vine that threatened to strangle their marriage. This time he let her go when she pulled at her hands. Caroline stood and walked to the fireplace.
“What is it?” Luke pushed himself up and came to stand behind her.
Caroline stared blindly at the mantel. How could she think when all she wanted to do was turn around and hide her face against his strong chest? But if she continued to bury her true feelings, could their marriage survive?
After silently debating which course to take, Caroline turned and faced him. “I know I’m not the woman you truly love.”
His wife’s expression was a mixture of pain and determination. Luke felt like she’d punched him in the stomach. Hadn’t he just told her how much he admired her? But after a moment, he realized he needed to bare his past if he hoped to have a future with the woman standing in front of him. “You mean Amelia.”
“And Marianna, too, for that matter.”
He nodded. This was going to be hard, but it had to be done. He had to convince Caroline that he loved her and her only. He remembered the promise he’d made to God. He would do whatever he could to reassure her, to regain her love and respect. He was the one who needed to confess.
“Amelia Montgomery and I grew up together. Our parents always assumed we would one day marry, and I saw no reason to disagree. She had other ideas, however. I escorted her to Knoxville when her parents sent her to stay with relatives. While there, she got involved with the Underground Railroad and was eventually discovered. I thought my heart was broken by her deceit and her choosing someone else over me, and maybe it was.”
A soft cry pulled Luke from the past. He looked down at Caroline, surprised to see the sheen of tears brightening her eyes. Wishing he could submerge himself in the liquid blue, he sighed. “I suppose I was looking for someone more traditionally minded when I came down here to lick my wounds. So I focused on Marianna Lister.” He could feel a smile turn up his lips. “I could never imagine someone like the proper Miss Lister getting involved in the Underground Railroad. She is consumed with more mundane concerns—the number of flounces on her skirt or the latest dance steps.”
He sighed as he saw a tear spill over and roll down Caroline’s cheek. “For a short while, I thought I could live with that, but then I met a golden-haired beauty who was neither too worldly nor too accomplished. A young woman with faith to inspire me to become a better man.” Luke knelt in front of her and grasped both of Caroline’s hands. “A woman whose quiet example has helped lead me into a closer relationship with Jesus.”
Another tear followed the first down her cheek and landed on their clasped hands.
“Please don’t cry, dearest. You have my heart. You have the best of both of the women I once considered. When I was lying in that cave, weak and wounded, I asked the Lord into my heart. He resides within me now, and I am no longer the man I once was. That’s why I’ve been asking you so many questions lately about the scriptures. I feel such a need to understand, to absorb all of God’s Word.”
“That’s wonderful, Luke. I guess I didn’t realize how far you were from God.”
“I was a fool. I thought I was in control of my life, but I have learned otherwise. I am learning to turn that control over to Him. I’ve read His Word all my life, but now the Bible is personal. Now I understand the sacrifice He made for me even though I was nothing but a worthless sinner. My eyes have been opened, and I can truly appreciate the woman I married.”
Caroline sank to the floor in front of him. “I love you, Luke, with all of my heart. I’m sorry for questioning you.”
“You had the right.” He gathered her close. “I’ve been so wrong. Can you ever forgive me?”
“Of course I can. It makes it so much easier when I understand your past. Can you forgive me for being secretive?”
“Yes. I have come to realize your desire to help the slaves. I told Hezekiah that I plan to free all of our slaves and help them get started however we can. I trust my decision meets with your approval…?”
The light in her eyes was all the answer he needed. Luke leaned toward her, planning to taste the sweetness of her lips, but she ducked before he reached his goal. “What is it, dearest? Is something still bothering you?”
“N–no. Well…yes. As a matter of fact, I have some very special news. I’ve been waiting for what seems an eternity to tell you.”
Another problem? He would not allow whatever was worrying her to come between them. “Whatever this problem is, Caroline, we will face it together.”
A blush darkened her cheeks, increasing his curiosity. “I have been feeling a bit out of sorts for the past weeks—sick and irritable.”
“I would never describe you as irritable, Caroline.” He winked at her, hoping to ease her discomfort. “Not since you and Grandma ironed out your differences anyway.”
She put a hand on his mouth. “Please don’t distract me, Husband, or I will never manage to get to the point.”
“All right. Tell me straight out. I’m completely recovered, and we don’t have much time. If you’re sick, I will make sure someone is here to nurse you as well as you have taken care of me. And when I get back, I’ll put cotton in my ears if you’re still irritable. That way I’ll be spared your complaints.”
She giggled. “I’m not sick, not really. It’s just that…well…we’re going to have an extra guest at Christmas this year.”
He must be dense because he could not make sense of what she was trying to tell him.
Caroline sighed and leaned close enough that he could feel her breath on his cheek. “You’re going to be a father.”
The whispered words swirled around in his head, shocking him into absolute silence. A father? He was going to be a father? “You’re expecting?” His voice broke on the last word. He grabbed her shoulders and pushed her ba
ck enough to see her face. The confirmation was there, along with her hesitant joy.
He pulled her close again and dropped quick kisses on her forehead and cheek before claiming her lips. They were going to have a child! What a miracle! She was so soft, so yielding—the mother of his children. Feeling her kiss him back was sweeter than anything he’d ever imagined. A prayer of thanks filled his heart and mind. Luke knew he would spend the rest of his life thanking God for all His blessings.
Epilogue
July 21, 1863
A feeling of homesickness filled Caroline as she looked out over the front lawn. What would Ma and Tory be doing today? Were they okay? It was so hard being separated from them. Had her family escaped to Natchez? Or were they still in Jackson? How she wished for some news, but Shady Oaks was too remote. They were cut off from everyone.
Caroline turned from the window to face Grandma Darby, one hand absently rubbing her slightly rounded stomach. “I think I’ll go outside to pick some flowers now that the rain has stopped. The arrangement in the entry hall is sorely in need of replacement.”
“Don’t wander far from the house, dear.” The older woman flipped idly through the pages of a Godey’s Lady’s Book that had to be almost a year old. “The overseer said he saw some drifters yesterday down by the river.”
“I won’t. I just feel so out of sorts. And the baby has been restless all day long. Maybe a walk will do us both good.” Caroline left the older woman, lifting her skirt to avoid a soaking as she headed for the garden shed for shears and a basket.
When she had the necessary implements for her task, Caroline walked to the flower garden and began gathering the fresh blossoms. Hot, golden sunshine poked through the fleeing storm clouds, raising steam from the damp grass and hedges. The air wrapped around her face like a warm sponge as she worked.
Soon her basket was full of fragrant flowers. Caroline straightened and turned to retrace her steps when her gaze fell on two bedraggled strangers walking toward Shady Oaks on the main drive. Her heart thumped unpleasantly. They had been so blessed to remain untouched by the battles waging in the state, and she prayed these men would not threaten their peace. Tales of burned-out homes and crops haunted her, but Caroline pushed them away as she moved to intercept the strangers.
The shade of the towering oaks lining the drive hid their features at their current distance, but she could tell that one of the men was limping. He was white, and his larger companion was a black man. The lame one turned his head to say something, and her breath caught.
She knew that profile. The basket of flowers fell at her feet. “Luke!” Joy replaced her fear as Caroline ran toward them. She reached him and threw her arms around her husband, almost knocking him down in her enthusiasm. “I’m so happy to see you.” She tried to hide the catch of worry in her voice. He was thin, far thinner than he’d been when he left for Vicksburg. His uniform hung loose, as though it had been made to fit a giant.
“Until now I don’t think I ever fully understood the meaning of the phrase ‘You’re a sight for sore eyes.’ ” Luke bent his head and covered her lips with his own.
She melted at the familiar touch, but their baby kicked out, apparently not as pleased by the embrace as his mother. Caroline’s cheeks flushed.
Luke held her at arm’s length, a look of shock on his face. Then he laughed and wrapped his arms around her more gingerly.
Caroline emerged from her husband’s embrace and looked over his shoulder at Hezekiah. “Both of you look exhausted. Let’s get you inside. I know Dinah is going to be as excited as I am. I hope the two of you are ready to be pampered and coddled.”
She placed her shoulder under her husband’s arm to help steady him as they moved down the drive together. “Is it true Vicksburg has fallen to the Yankees?”
Luke nodded. “We held them off in pitched battles, but Grant’s siege doomed us to failure. We could not get supplies past them, and we never received any reinforcements. Food disappeared within the first few weeks. People were reduced to eating horse meat and even rats at the end. And the daily barrage of cannon fire destroyed almost everything in the city. People dug tunnels or took shelter in caves along the riverbank.”
Imagining the deprivation he had faced made Caroline feel ill. “Why didn’t everyone escape down the river?”
“Where would they go? Every settlement from New Orleans to Memphis is under Federal control.” He shook his head. “Vicksburg was the final town. General Pemberton’s surrender gave the Yankees their final victory. They have a choke hold on the Confederacy. It’s only a matter of time until the war will be over.”
His words brought her hope. The war couldn’t end soon enough for her. They climbed the steps slowly, and she pushed the front door open. “Look who has come home.”
Her raised voice brought Grandma Darby to the entry hall as well as the household slaves. Soon they were in the midst of a crying, laughing, chattering group of people. After everyone had a chance to welcome the master home, Caroline sent Cora and her kitchen assistants out back to prepare a special meal to celebrate the heroes’ return. The housekeeper, Mabel, shooed the maids upstairs to get the bedchamber refreshed. Dinah dragged Hezekiah outside to their cabin on the far side of the cane fields so she and their children could tend to him.
Luke escorted Grandma Darby to her chair before taking a seat next to Caroline in the parlor. “It’s good to be home.”
“Yes.” Grandma Darby picked up the needlework she’d abandoned earlier. “We’re relieved you’re safe and sound.”
“It’s due to God lending us strength and endurance.” Luke gazed out one of the windows, but Caroline had the feeling he was not seeing the front lawn. “If not for His faithfulness, we would have perished several times. Once Pemberton surrendered, we were all taken prisoner. Our weapons were confiscated, but we at least were given food to eat. It took some time, but most of my men were furloughed.” He stopped for a moment, and his gaze refocused. He looked down at Caroline, his eyes sad. “The ones who didn’t die in the siege, that is.”
Caroline wished she could ease the pain in his expression. Lord, please help me do the right thing for my husband.
After a moment, Luke sighed and continued. “Hezekiah found me as soon as I was released, and we started for home. That was three days ago.”
“Praise God.” The heartfelt words came from Grandma Darby.
Caroline echoed her sentiment.
Luke shook himself and reached for Caroline’s hand. “Enough about me. How are you feeling? How’s the baby?”
“I feel wonderful now that you’re here. And the baby must be healthy, judging by his activities day in and day out.”
Luke put a gentle hand on her stomach. “It’s a miracle. I can’t wait to see you holding our child in your arms.”
A vision of the four of them took root in her mind—she and Grandma Darby nurturing the baby while Luke set the child’s feet on the narrow path to deep and abiding faith. And God willing, they would have other children, children who would fill the halls of Shady Oaks with love and laughter. She leaned against the back of the sofa.
“Is something wrong, Caroline?” Luke’s voice was filled with concern.
Caroline shook her head. “Everything is very right.”
A rustle from the other side of the room indicated Grandma Darby’s tactful exit.
Luke released her hand and took her in his arms. “I love you, Caroline. I thought of you so often while I was stuck in Vicksburg.”
“I prayed for you every night, dearest.”
“Your prayers kept me alive. I could feel God’s touch even in the hardest days, even when men and women were dying around me.” He feathered kisses on her cheeks and forehead before capturing her lips with his own.
Time stood still as they shared soft words of love and devotion. The war might not quite be over, but at Shady Oaks, peace beyond all understanding flowed strong and true.
Christian Fiction for Women is your onli
ne home for the latest in Christian fiction.
Check us out online for:
• Giveaways t Recipes
• Info about Upcoming Releases
• Book Trailers
• News and More!
Find Christian Fiction for Women at Your Favorite Social Media Site:
Search “Christian Fiction for Women”
@fictionforwomen
Mississippi Brides Page 45