‘You joining us, Mike?’ Natalie asked me.
‘Er, no thanks,’ I replied. ‘I've got to go but...’
I had no idea what I was saying.
I looked to Jason again. ‘I wanted to ask you about...that thing.’
‘What thing?’ Jason smiled up at me, obviously enjoying watching me struggle. I knew he was teasing me, but I didn't care. If I persisted then at least I would get an answer.
‘That thing you asked for,’ I replied, not caring that his friends were listening. I met his gaze and silently willed him to stop playing with me.
Jason still smiled, then made an exaggerated O-shape with his mouth, as he pretended to suddenly remember. ‘Ohh, right. That thing.’ He chuckled to himself as he looked around the ground. ‘Where's my beer?’
I watched as he grabbed a beer bottle and stood up, looking a little unsteady on his feet. He walked right past me and didn't wait. I blindly followed him, hearing a faint ‘See ya, Mike,’ from Natalie.
Jason took a long swig from his beer as he slowly walked towards the glow of the lights from Eddy's.
I caught up with him and asked, ‘Where are we going?’
My eyes were drawn to his mouth as he drank the liquid. Jason lowered the bottle from his lips and wiped a hand across them before he replied. ‘Your car.’
With the strange sensation in my stomach once again, I led the way through the lot. In the dim light I kept looking back to check Jason was actually following me. I was terrified and thrilled at the same time. When we reached my car I went around to the driver’s side and waited. Jason leant back to look at the model with a slight frown.
‘What?’ I asked, puzzled.
‘Nothin',’ he smiled, hand grabbing at the door. I watched him get in at the passenger side then quickly followed. With the doors shut, inside the dark car I looked at Jason, the orange glow from a lot lamp high above our only light.
He shifted in his seat and held out his hand to me. ‘Let's see it then, jock.’
Assuming he meant the money, I pulled my wallet out and handed over my wad of notes. Jason took them and, balancing his beer precariously on my car's gear box, proceeded to slowly count the money.
‘Alright,’ he declared, folding the notes he tucked them into his jacket. He sat back and picked up his beer again, waiting for me. ‘Go on, then.’
I blinked. ‘Er...?’
Jason gestured at the steering wheel with a sweeping hand. ‘Drive. You know, go some place.’
‘We're not staying here?’
My question was met with a withering look, like a child might do to his parent.
‘OK,’ I sighed, starting the engine. ‘Where are we going?’
‘Go up to the cliff at West Wood.’
‘That's miles out,’ I protested, not sure what I'd gotten myself into.
‘Won't take long in this car,’ Jason smiled at me. ‘I want to drive up to the cliff.’
I knew there was no point arguing; he had me doing everything else he said anyway, why stop now?
I drove on the main road towards the edge of town. Jason distracted me by rummaging through the glove compartment.
‘I can't believe you don't have any music,’ he complained. ‘What’s the point having a stereo like this with no tapes?’ He turned his attention to the radio instead, switched it on and messed around with the dials. I heard the station I usually tuned in to disappear as crackles and the odd burst of random song offended my ears.
‘What are you doing?’ I muttered, trying to concentrate on the road.
‘Relax, jock,’ he teased. ‘I'm just finding somethin' cool.’
I was thrilled at having Jason in my car, the energy that came from having him here messing up my equilibrium was a rush. I gripped the steering wheel tightly and accelerated. Now the radio was tuned into a station Jason approved of he sat back and drank his beer, opening his window down. The cool breeze rushing into the car was a welcome sensation.
As we reached the edge of town and started up the dark main road towards West Wood a new song started. Jason flew forward and twisted the volume up to what seemed like a horrific level. ‘Shouldn't you turn that down?’ I shouted over the swirls of dramatic keyboards and electronic undertones.
‘What?’ Jason laughed at me. ‘We're in the middle of nowhere! Anyway, this band rule.’
I glanced either side of the road in the darkness, the silhouettes of trees rushing past. I worried about the loud noise we made as we sped towards the cliff, but I was equally enthralled by this burst of energy from Jason. I had never seen him get excited about anything before, except maybe the pin ball machine.
‘Who is it?’ I asked, having to shout.
‘Depeche Mode,’ he laughed at me, swaying in his seat to the music as he swigged back more beer.
I stared ahead at the road, smiling to myself a little. It was an alright song, the dramatic chords building up around the singer's voice seemed to sit well with the darkness and creepy shadows of the trees.
I wasn't normally keen on woods in the dark, it just made me think of urban legends about murderers. When we came off the main road onto the dirt track to the cliff I turned the volume right down on the radio. I didn't want to announce to the whole mountainside that we were here.
Jason snickered. Either it was the effects of the pot or he was laughing at me again.
‘What?’ I asked, trying to glance at him while carefully navigating the car up the dark, unmarked track.
‘No-one's out here, jock. You can relax.’
‘We're out here,’ I countered, staring ahead at the track. We were climbing upwards, trees on one side and mountain brush on the other. I knew under the bushes was nothing more than a sheer drop to the ground below. It made me nervous.
Jason's snicker turned into a snort of laughter. ‘Yeah, we are. Glad we got that covered.’
Instead of answering, I simply took in a deep breath of air and exhaled slowly. I thought if I didn't rise to his goading that would be the simplest way forward. But Jason soon found another way to panic me, as he stuck his head and shoulders out his window and leaned out of the car. My heart skipped a beat and I slowed the car as much as I could.
‘What are you doing?! Get back in!’
‘Why you slowing down?’ Jason asked over his shoulder, voice snatched away by the wind.
‘'Cause you're hanging out of my car!’ I replied, flustered. I brought the car to a stop, jolting him slightly. The bottle of beer he was still carrying spilled a few drops of froth on my car and him. Jason sat back down in his seat and rolled his eyes, wiping the beer off his jacket.
‘Alright, alright. Jeez, man...’
‘Will you put your seatbelt on?’ I asked.
Jason slouched down in his seat like a petulant child. ‘No,’ he said, pointedly. ‘Look, will you hurry up already? We're almost there if you'd stop driving like an old lady.’
I didn't see the point in arguing with Jason, but what seemed perfectly normal to him was reckless to me. I'd started to worry he was going to have some sort of accident whilst we were up here; when we arrived at the make-shift parking area by the rangers cabin he opened the door before I even stopped the car. He hopped out with barely a stumble, heading back towards the dirt track.
I didn't bother parking properly, just yanked up the hand break and cut the engine. Once the headlights were out there was only the blue-white tint from the moon allowing me to see. I jumped out, shutting my door and his that he'd left open, following him at a jog.
‘Where are you going?’ I hissed.
Jason glanced back over his shoulder as I approached. I could see him reasonably well in the night light, and saw another withering look for my benefit. ‘Why are you whispering? There's no-one here!’
I knew he was right, but I still didn't want anyone joining us. As if reading my mind, with a smirk Jason added, ‘Except maybe that lunatic who escaped from Fulbourne recently.’
‘Huh? What?’ I asked, knowin
g he was teasing me but starting to panic all the same.
Fulbourne was the old mental institution on the other side of the woods. Jason didn't answer and kept walking, swigging back the last drop of beer from the bottle. I followed behind him. I thought I could hear him snickering as we crossed the dirt track we'd just come in on.
‘Where are you going?’
‘I wanna see the view,’ he finally answered, striding over the large curve of ground where the flat rock went out into the dark night. I paused, my sneakers crunched on mountain grit.
‘It's not safe,’ I warned him, ‘They say the rocks can crumble away beneath you.’
Jason snorted a laugh as he ducked under the simple wooden barrier. ‘Here, jock,’ he shrugged off his jacket and draped it over the barrier. ‘Now if I fall off at least you can get your money back.’ He smiled at me, then turned to continue towards the edge of the cliff, carrying the now empty beer bottle by its neck.
I felt indignant that Jason wasn't taking my warning seriously, or that he thought I cared more about the money. I was also worried about him having an accident that would leave me having to explain why I was up here with him in the first place.
I ducked under the barrier, ignoring his jacket and my money inside. I picked my way carefully forwards, glancing at the ground every so often in the dark to make sure I was treading on something solid. When I looked up Jason was standing at the very edge of the rock, watching me.
‘You crack me up,’ he said as I neared him. ‘Relax, its fine.’ To make his point, he stamped his foot a couple of times on the ground, dust rising up under the impact.
I tensed. ‘Please don't do that,’ I asked, holding my hands out. If I was nearer I'd have throttled him. Jason laughed, then turned his attention to the view below.
‘See that rock down there?’ He pointed out.
I wasn't quite near enough to see down. I didn't want to get any nearer for fear of putting too much weight on the edge.
‘Which rock?’ I asked warily, hoping he didn't want to climb down or anything.
‘Down there,’ he repeated, raising the beer bottle up. The moonlight caught the glass and flashed along its length. It distracted me for a moment before I realized what he was doing.
‘Twenty bucks says I can hit it.’
‘Huh? No-!’
It was too late, Jason hurled the bottle down the cliff. I heard a small blow of air catch inside as it sailed overhead before smashing somewhere down below.
‘Ah forget it, it was nowhere near,’ he said, sounding disappointed.
‘Don't do that!’ I hissed, hands waving with frustration. I was relieved he didn't have any more bottles to throw.
Jason frowned at me. ‘What? What's your problem?’
‘Just...don't do it!’ I pleaded.
‘Or what?’ he countered.
‘Huh?’
‘If you're gonna go telling me what to do, jock, you better have a damn good reason why I should listen.’
I opened my mouth but wasn't sure what to argue with. I didn't know why we were arguing anyway. ‘You can't go throwing glass everywhere,’ I finally managed to reply.
‘Says who?’
‘Everyone!’ I said, feeling ridiculous.
My lame answer was met with another snicker from Jason. I saw his hands go to the pockets on his jeans, searching. Then thankfully he came away from the edge and walked back towards the barrier. I was hoping we would leave the cliff edge now, but Jason hopped up onto the barrier to sit as he looked through the pockets on his jacket.
Walking up to him I watched as he pulled out a packet of cigarettes and a lighter. I had to wait as he lit one and started to smoke it. He didn't look like he was ready to move.
‘Let me tell you something, jock,’ he said, blowing out smoke which was whipped away by the night air. ‘Life lesson number one, if you want someone to do something for you, you'd better have something they want that you can use. Otherwise no-one's gonna pay any attention. Nice guys finish last, right?’
I studied his face in the moonlight. He seemed sincere for once, but I was confused by his words.
‘I get by just fine,’ I said.
‘Oh really?’ The corners of Jason's mouth crept up. ‘And how are you getting on right now?’
I didn't answer straight away. His question made my heart begin to thump and my skin feel hot. ‘OK,’ I answered, hyper aware that he was playing with me.
Jason sucked on the cigarette, its ember glowing in the dark. ‘So,’ he said, blowing out the smoke. ‘Who would you say has the upper hand then?’
‘Me,’ I stated, determined to show I was more in control than I felt. ‘I have the car.’
He smiled and nodded his head as if considering. ‘You do have the car. So how does that help you?’
‘I could drive off and leave you here,’ I warned.
Jason's smile turned into a smirk. ‘You could,’ he challenged. ‘But we both know that you won't.’
‘How do you know?’ I said, indignant that he could read me like a book.
‘Because you haven't had what you want yet.’
His words set me alight, but with both desire and frustration. I silently began to fume as he sat there gazing back at me with a confident smirk, and there was nothing I could do about it.
Or maybe there was.
‘I'm leaving,’ I announced heatedly.
Jason's only answer was to raise one eyebrow as he continued to smoke.
I'll show him, I thought. I turned on my heel and marched back to the car. It was darker in the parking area because of the trees, the night air brushed through their leaves making them whisper. I didn't like being out there at all.
As I got to the car and scrabbled to get my key in the lock, I looked back. Jason was still sitting on the barrier, but had shifted sideways to watch me. I saw him raise the cigarette up again, a small glow of red as he calmly took a drag. It was obvious he wasn't moving.
In frustration I yanked the car door open and got in, slamming it shut behind me. I put my key in the ignition but didn't turn it. I looked back through the window. Jason hadn't moved. I felt faintly ridiculous at storming off, and would have liked to drive away. But I couldn't leave someone up here in the middle of the night. He knew I wouldn't. He also knew the real reason I was staying, the reason I was trying to distract myself from, was that tender ache in my groin.
I cursed under my breath in exasperation. So now I was sitting here like an idiot waiting for him. Well, at least it was warmer in here, I thought. He couldn't stay out there forever.
As if to prove his point, Jason was in no hurry. He was probably too drunk or stoned to feel the cold anyway. I watched frustrated, in the dark, while he finished smoking his cigarette. He finally got down from the barrier and carrying his jacket, stalked back to my car. As he neared me I felt hot again and my heart hammered.
When he opened the passenger door I expected him to get in, but he threw his jacket inside then found the click to pull the seat forward. I watched him step into the back of the car, feeling suddenly panicked.
This was it then, I realized. I was going to have to move. I got out of the car with shaky legs and clicked my own seat forward. When I'd climbed in the back and shut the door I felt my heart pound; I was sure he could hear it beating. I managed to force my eyes up to look at Jason; in the dark of my car, he seemed quite calm. A smile played on his lips as he gazed back at me.
‘Alright then, jock,’ he said softly. ‘Show me what you got.’
I became hard at his words. As I undid my jeans with slightly shaking hands I did still wonder that this may be some elaborate joke. But I was past the point of no return; tense and with only one thing on my mind. Bracing in the confines of the back-seat and lifting my hips up, I pushed my jeans down.
The blood was pounding in my ears from nerves. I sat back against the cool leather of the seat, my erection now free. I’ll always remember those moments, as I sat there so incredibly nervous
but turned on. I stared down, not quite believing I was showing myself to another guy like this, panicking that he was playing a joke and would simply burst out laughing at me then tell everyone at school.
After a few tense seconds I dared to look up at Jason, half expecting him to tell me to put it away again. In the dark while I panicked, I saw that sly smile tug at the corners of his mouth. As he swept a hand behind his head and twisted his long hair together, I realized he was going to do it. Jason didn’t look at me again as he leaned over my lap and bent down. My heart thudded and my breathing deepened as I felt his warm, wet mouth on me.
He’s actually doing it, I thought.
And boy, did he do it. I briefly thought back to the girls who had done the same thing for me over my dating years. I’d always rated Stephanie Jones, one of the cheerleaders, as the best. I gasped now as I felt his tongue and mouth work on me. He wasn’t hesitant, not by any means. In fact he was doing it the way I’d often wished girls had done.
As I looked down in the dark at a head of long hair, I thought it kinda looked like a girl was bent over my lap. The urge to run my fingers through that hair was strong, but I didn’t think he would like that, and I didn’t want him to stop. I leaned my arms back on the seat to keep them away and closed my eyes. I pressed my lips together to stifle a moan; it felt so good.
I knew he was trying to bring me off quickly but I attempted to hold out. It was a lost cause; even though I had already come just a couple of hours ago I could feel I was near again. My hands gripped and squeaked on the leather seat as I groaned through clenched teeth. I came in his mouth but he didn’t pull away. Not like some of the girls I’d been with, I thought absently. I gasped and shuddered with pleasure. I can’t believe he did it, I thought.
I opened my eyes as I felt him start to pull away; the air felt cool on my bare flesh. I watched as Jason rose his head and shoulders, his eyes flickered up to me briefly. I couldn’t see much but in the dim light I was sure I saw the corner of his mouth creep up in a half smile. I didn’t know how to react, suddenly embarrassed.
Lucky for me Jason didn’t hang about, he turned away, opened the car door and got out. He slammed it shut on me. I was still a little stunned, and watched him through the window. His hands reached up to hold his hair away, as he leant forward and spat twice onto the gravel. I realized what he must be spitting out, and blushed in the dark. I shuffled on the seat to get my jeans back on. As I was zipping up my fly, Jason opened the door again and popped the seat back. He retrieved another cigarette from his jacket and lit it.
The Price of Falling Page 3