Barbara applauded William enthusiastically.
When he returned to his seat she smiled at him and mouthed. “You did good!”
“Thank you!” he mouthed back.
~*~*~*~
At the end of the fabulous meal, guests were treated to a performance by the award-winning Mekyla. During the performance, Barbara excused herself to go to the ladies room.
When she reached the door she saw the same brunette who had been speaking to William, deep in conversation with another woman.
They didn’t appear to have seen her enter and she slipped quietly into one of the stalls and locked the door. This was confirmed when Barbara heard the brunette say, “Can you believe who William showed up with tonight? That American actress. I don’t know where he finds these women. The last woman was that gauche singer – Willow something – or was she the second last. Anyhow, his taste in women leaves much to be desired.”
“She’s very pretty, though.”
“Who?”
“The one he’s with tonight.”
“I suppose, if you like those Barbie doll types.”
“She is seated right next to Prince William.”
“I know, Lydia. I almost died. She has no business being there. She’s a nobody. She has no pedigree. She’s just an entertainer. In fact, I’m sure I read somewhere that she isn’t even white. Her father was some mixed breed, half-black, half-Jew person. I swear, ever since we broke up he’s been sinking lower and lower beneath his social class. I think he’s in crisis or something. Too much power too early. Makes people think they are gods and can flout rules.”
“Speaking of God did you hear his little speech about accepting Jesus Christ?”
“Oh my gosh! How embarrassing! You see what I mean? He’s just gone totally bonkers. Actually proselytizing at a benefit dinner for heaven’s sake. That’s one of the reasons I broke up with him. It was very difficult to keep him in line. One never knew what he was going to do.”
“You broke up with him? I remember you saying, ‘that heartless bastard dumped me after he thought I’d miscarried his child and realized he didn’t have to marry me after all’.”
“Potayto, potahto. If he hadn’t broken it off I would’ve eventually. Why do you think I had the abortion? I realized how unappreciative and ungrateful he was. You know I lowered myself when I agreed to marry him in the first place. He didn’t even have a title yet.”
“Yes, but Tori, the bucket loads of money he has would have compensated. He’s worth a fortune on both sides – Lamport and Foster. I would have endured any idiosyncrasies and even lack of a title for that kind of money.”
“That’s the difference between you and me, Lydia. Money isn’t everything to me.”
“Do you ever feel regret, though, that you aren’t Lady William Lamport. Money aside, he’s very easy on the eyes, I almost swooned tonight when he glanced my way.”
“Oh, stop acting like a groupie, Lydia. Sure he’s good looking but believe me those looks can get old very fast if there’s no proper behavior to go with them. I’m happy to be married to Jonathan. He may not be as rich as William but at least he knows how to conduct himself.”
“You mean he’s a snob like you.”
“Oh, shut up. Like you aren’t one too. Don’t light that in here. For heaven’s sake, Lydia, don’t you see the No Smoking sign?”
“Fine. I’ll have my smoke outside.”
“Do that. I’ll see you later.”
Barbara had been rooted to her spot during the whole sordid conversation, not knowing whether she should leave, or whether she should stay and hear the entire thing. Now, she stood there contemplating whether she should walk out now and reveal herself or stay until it had grown quiet.
Things were shortly decided for her, when she heard the muted clickety-click of high heels on the tiles leaving the bathroom.
~*~*~*~
William noticed that Barbara was deep in thought as they drove back to the Waldorf. He had tried to draw her into conversation, but she seemed rather pensive and had just given him one word answers. He started to wonder if maybe he was being too affectionate.
While he had resolved to keep things very casual between them, when she had opened her hotel door and pulled him into her arms that evening, the feelings he had for her had hit him with such force that he had almost reeled. He had disregarded the little voice inside of him that told him not to get carried away and he had related to her as though she was his girlfriend and not his friend who happened to be a girl. Well, almost. If she was his girlfriend he would have kissed her senseless on sight.
He reached over now and took her hand.
She glanced at him in slight surprise.
“What’s bothering you?” he asked.
She forced a smile. “Nothing.”
“Don’t say ‘nothing’. There’s something bothering you. What’s going on?”
She was silent for a few minutes then she sighed. “Who was that woman you were speaking with earlier this evening in the Waterloo Chamber?”
“Which woman? I spoke with several women.”
“The pretty brunette with the scornful green eyes. The one in the black dress.”
“Oh, her. You have never met her have you? That was Victoria. Victoria Compton-Rotherley.”
“That’s what I thought.”
“Is that why you’re so quiet? Do you think that there’s something going on between us? Listen, I have absolutely no interest in Victoria. Besides, she’s married to The Viscount Rotherley, poor sap.”
“No. That’s not it. It’s just that…”
“What?”
Barbara sighed deeply again and then plunged ahead. “William, I overheard her in the ladies room saying a lot of nasty things which I don’t really want to repeat. But the most notable was that she didn’t have a miscarriage…she had an abortion.”
“What are you saying?”
“I mean that when she told you she’d miscarried it wasn’t true. She aborted the baby.”
“What! Who was she saying this to?”
“Some woman named Lydia.”
“Lydia Reeds-Bowen no doubt. Her partner in crime. Well if she was speaking to her it’s most likely true.”
William was quiet for a long time as he silently grappled with the news and its implications. How could Victoria have done such a thing to him? She’d pleaded with him to marry her, to save her from the shame of having a child out of wedlock and then turned around and aborted that child. What a horrible woman she was. Could he ever again see her in social situations and be civil? He had broken up with Barbara for nothing!
That last thought gave him pause. If Victoria hadn’t aborted their child he’d have married her and they’d probably still be married. The abortion had actually left him free to pursue Barbara. So should he be glad she’d aborted the child? It wasn’t right to be glad even though it had brought him the freedom he’d craved.
There had been so many nights he’d laid awake and wished that he could turn back the clock, wished that he had never gotten her pregnant. Then pouf, just like that, there was no more pregnancy, no more child. He had been relieved. He’d never confessed it to a soul, not even to himself. But he now realized that even though he’d allowed himself to grieve for a short while over the loss of their child, deep down the greatest emotion he’d felt had been immense relief. And, yes, he admitted now that even though he’d continued their engagement it had been to save face, it had been to keep up the appearance of not being a heartless brute. But deep inside he had been wondering what would be a respectable length of time, following a miscarriage, to break up with one’s fiancée.
Why hadn’t he ever realized before how truly selfish he’d been in this whole affair. God was certainly shining light in the dark areas of his life and it made him feel naked and dirty and ashamed.
God, please forgive me for being so selfish that I considered my own child to be standing in the way of my happiness. Lord, help me to be
able to forgive Victoria for what she did.
Barbara’s touch on his arm drew him out of his deep thought. “Are you alright?” she asked carefully.
William didn’t answer immediately. He couldn’t share everything he’d just been thinking with Barbara. Not yet anyway. He couldn’t bear for her to see him as he truly was. She’d probably be disgusted. No, for now that had to stay between him and God.
He was still mad at Victoria, though. Despite his own failings she had been dead wrong to do what she had.
William stared off into space for a few minutes then he gave a short shake of his head. “No...but I will be. The fact that she murdered my child and then lied to me about it makes me feel very angry. To think that I was planning to marry that deceitful little –”
“Wills, I know you feel wronged by her, but you’ve got to find it in your heart to forgive her. God’s word tells us that if we won’t forgive others then God won’t forgive us. Don’t let her stand in the way of your salvation.”
She drew closer to him and took his head in her hands. She caressed his face and their eyes met. “You need to forgive her, Wills,” she whispered.
William wanted to kiss her so badly right then. To be comforted by her touch and her warmth. But he knew that it would be a mistake to do so. He had to be patient with Barbara or he ran the risk of losing her forever. Instead he took her hand in his and kissed the palm.
“It’s okay. I’ll be okay.”
“Can I pray for you right now?”
“I’d appreciate that very much, sweetheart.”
Chapter 30
Five months later
A hand landed on William’s shoulder.
“Everything okay, Wills?”
William looked up to see his cousin, Peter, standing beside him.
He was at a party hosted by Prince Harry at the Ham Polo Club following the Chavarty Cup. He was not in a good mood. His team had lost and, worse yet, he’d had an encounter with Lady Victoria Compton-Rotherley.
Her husband had participated in one of the matches and he had run into her after he’d left the changing room.
“William. How are you?” she said.
“I’ve had better days,” he answered shortly.
“Too bad your team lost. I know how much you hate to lose.”
“Do you? Do you also know how much I hate being lied to?” He knew that he should have left it for another time but somehow he couldn’t.
She looked puzzled. “What are you talking about?”
He looked around and saw some other players approaching sharing a joke. He jerked his head towards the gardens. “Let’s talk a minute shall we?”
She hesitated for a few seconds and then followed him as he walked towards the gardens. As soon as he felt that they had put enough distance between them and the club house he turned to her, fighting to control his anger.
“Is it true that you aborted our baby?”
She appeared momentarily stunned by his directness. Then she folded her arms across her chest and lifted a brow. “Oh it’s ‘our baby’ now is it? Okay. Well, I don’t know how you found out but fine, yes I did. What of it?”
He felt anger boil in him at her nerve. She didn’t look the least bit contrite.
“Why you little–” he bit his tongue as he struggled to not let any unwholesome talk come out of his mouth. He took a deep breath and then spoke in a more controlled tone. “How could you? That was my child too. You had no right to make a decision like that without consulting me.”
“I had every right. It was my body and my decision to make. I wasn’t even planning to tell you about the pregnancy in the first place.”
“What!”
“That’s right. Since we’re getting things out in the open you might as well know that I was extremely hurt by the shabby way you treated me. When I broke up with you weeks before you went off to Rother Hill Manor did you really think that I was serious?”
“What do you mean? Why wouldn’t I have believed you?”
“You know for someone who’s supposed to be a genius you are rather daft. It was supposed to jolt you from your complacency and get you to realize that you were in danger of losing me. Then I found out I was pregnant and my first instinct was to get rid of it. I never wanted children. I’d actually made an appointment to have it done, when I was browsing the newsstands a few days later and what should I see but you, flaunting your American lover in front of me. I was so humiliated I wanted to die. Can you imagine how I felt knowing that not even a month had passed and you were involved with someone else?”
William’s mind drifted back to that photo of him and Barbara that had been snapped by the photographer in West Sussex. In many ways it felt like a lifetime ago. That was the only photo Victoria could be referring to.
“Listen, Victoria, let’s not pretend. Even before you broke up with me things had not been going well between us. There was never any possibility of us getting back together.”
“I don’t agree. We might not have been a perfect couple but how many couples in our set really are. If you hadn’t met her I’m sure you would have come to realize how well suited we were. Instead, you got infatuated with an actress. William, she’s a commoner and, worst yet, an entertainer. You’re a Foster, the grandson of the Duke of Westminster. You really should have been more responsible.”
William bit his tongue again. He was determined that Victoria wasn’t going to provoke him to say or do something he’d regret.
“Mum assured me that sometimes men get confused and infatuated with inappropriate women and lose their heads. I knew after seeing you two together that the only way to help you to see reason would be to keep the child. I believed that your sense of duty wouldn’t allow you to abandon me. And I was prepared to suffer through pregnancy and getting fat to help you to come to your senses,” she continued.
“Help me come to my senses? Am I supposed to believe that you were being some kind of saint? What absolute rubbish! Do you think that I believe for one second that concern for me played any part in your scheme? You’ve just confirmed what a devious, self-centered, spoilt brat you are!”
“Insulting me won’t change the fact that I was trying to do right by both our families. In the end, though, I realized it was useless. You were ungrateful and reckless, with no regard for social rules – still are I see. After all my sacrifices you were like a love sick puppy over her. Don’t look so shocked. Do you think that I didn’t notice how you were pining away? How every mention of her name or her photo in some magazine or on the telly would win your rapt attention? You barely took notice of me and you made no effort to even get involved in the wedding plans. So I decided to get rid of it. I wanted to see exactly what you’d do and not surprisingly you ran,” she said, her face twisted with bitterness.
“So why did you lie to me if you were so sure that you were right? Why did you tell me you’d miscarried?”
“Because I knew you’d take it badly. I know how self-involved and self-righteous you are. You have your personal values that you believe everyone else should abide by. It has always been about you and what you want. I told you to ask your chum Prince William to allow us to have our wedding reception at Windsor Castle but no, you wanted to have it at Rother Hill Manor. I told you to take time off from working with your dad so that we could search for a suitable country home but no, you refused to take time off work and then insisted that we could live at your apartment and on and on. It was always about you. About what you wanted.”
William was speechless at Victoria’s diatribe. Was she completely twisted or was he really that vile?
Regardless, he wasn’t about to let her off the hook that easily.
He shook his head as if to clear it, then said, “All about me! If it was all about me I wouldn’t have agreed to marry you. I wanted to marry Barbara, not you. The only reason I agreed to that was because you begged me not to abandon you. You are such an ungrateful….”
“Shut up! You think I shoul
d have been grateful, do you? Grateful for what? Your scarps? You made it painfully obvious that you didn’t want me. You only chose to marry me because it would have let down your precious family to know that their golden boy had gotten a woman pregnant and then dumped her. What a scandal that would have been. That’s precisely why I played the ‘I’m pregnant’ card. I knew you had to save face by marrying me. But make no mistake, it was clear that you were kicking and screaming all the way. So I got rid of it and good riddance to you and your brat too.”
William had never in his life come so close to striking a woman. He jammed his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels. He prayed for strength and self-control as he counted slowly to ten.
“Fine, so I’m a heartless bastard. But no matter how you perceived I treated you it doesn’t justify what you did. You murdered your own child. Don’t you see that? Can you be so blind?”
“How dare you judge me? You are in no position to judge me!” Victoria returned savagely.
“I’m not judging you. I’m telling you the truth. You need to seek forgiveness.”
“Forgiveness? Forgiveness from whom? You?”
“No forgiveness from God. No matter what you say you can’t be proud of what you did. That’s your own child that you killed Victoria.”
William saw a chink in her alabaster façade, her green eyes immediately teared up but her chin stayed stubborn and resolute.
“Listen, don’t preach to me, okay. It was not a baby it was just a fetus. I did not commit murder you smug, self-righteous, bastard! Preach to someone who’s interested. I’m not.” With that she turned on her heel and stalked away.
When he’d rejoined the party he’d felt like a zombie. His head had been spinning. Was it true? Had he treated Victoria so badly? Sure, half the issues she had with him were vain tripe, but the part about pining after Barbara he couldn’t deny. Victoria surely hadn’t deserved to be treated that way. He had chosen her and he should have committed to her all the way. No wonder Barbara didn’t want to commit to him. What in his history had demonstrated that he really knew how to treat a woman? He was now more convinced than ever that God was punishing him for his sins.
The Royal Couple: A Christian Romance (Royals Book 1) Page 30