by C. C. Wood
As Declan settled in the chair, he nodded. “I understand.”
For the next hour, we discussed salary, benefits, and a few of his expected duties. Declan assured us that he would be able to start on Monday the following week. As we walked him out of the office, Lucy came through the doors, stopping short when she saw him.
Chris tensed when Lucy looked over at me and gave me wide eyes and I had to bite back a laugh.
Once Declan was gone, Lucy turned to me. “Who was that?”
“Our new executive assistant,” I replied.
“Wow,” Lucy breathed. “I may have to come into the office more often.”
Chris cleared his throat. “I’m standing right here, ladies.”
We both smirked at him.
“And?” Lucy prompted.
The look he gave her promised retribution as soon as they were alone. I stifled a laugh when Lucy shivered. She might appreciate a good-looking man, but she was crazy about Chris and made no bones about it.
“Ready for lunch?” Chris asked, his voice low.
“Definitely,” she replied, her voice breathy.
I bit my lip to keep from voicing my amusement. I also felt a surge of poignancy and even a sliver of envy. I wanted a man to look at me the way Chris looked at Lucy. Well, I had it. Watching them, I recognized the expression on Chris’ face because I’d seen Landen wearing the same one on more than one occasion. I’d noticed it yesterday but seeing it again today only reinforced my decision when it came to Landen.
Before they walked out, Chris looked at me. “You should get started arranging the second office to your liking. If you need help, we’ll get Henderson in here to move the furniture.”
“What about the file cabinets?” I asked him.
He grimaced. “I forgot those were in there. Do you mind keeping them in the office until I can get the storage room re-arranged?”
I shrugged. “Sure. But I’ll call Henderson and see when they can come in to handle it next week. I don’t want it to become indefinite.”
Chris nodded and put his hand on Lucy’s lower back, guiding her to the door.
As they left, I settled at my desk. There were several items on my to-do list but my brain was still stuck on Landen. I picked up my phone and went to my text messages. I stared at the thread of messages under Landen’s name. He hadn’t texted me since he called Monday night and I’d missed talking to him all week.
It was Thursday now and I had no idea when he would be home, so I quickly typed in a message before I lost my nerve.
When will you be back?
I hit send and waited. Within a minute, he replied. I’m taking a red-eye tomorrow night. Will I see you?
I gnawed on my bottom lip as I formulated my answer. On Sat. We need to talk.
There was a long pause before he answered. Ok. What time?
Without letting myself think too much, I responded and sent the message. I’ll come by at 2.
My house?
I nodded then rolled my eyes when I realized that he couldn’t see me. Yes.
I’ll be waiting.
His last message read almost like a threat, as though he were a predator waiting to pounce. Knowing Landen, it likely was.
I put the phone down and picked up my pen, adding two more items to my to-do list. The first was to call Henderson about the file room and my new office and the second was to figure out what in the hell to say to Landen when I saw him on Saturday.
Chapter Twenty-Six
By the time Saturday afternoon rolled around, I was no closer to figuring out how to handle the meeting with Landen. I hadn’t slept well since our stilted text conversation and I was tired.
Since it was the end of June and temperatures in Dallas were closing in on triple digits, I slipped into a light sundress and didn’t bother with a lot of make-up. I would just sweat it off on the walk to my car.
When I pulled up in front of Landen’s, it was five to two and I wiped my damp palms on my skirt. I didn’t know why I was so nervous. Well, yes I did. In the last week, I wondered if Landen had examined our relationship in his brain as closely as I had. If he did, I was worried that he’d come to the realization that it was better for us to make a clean break now. As upset as I had been when I discovered that he lied to me, I didn’t want that. Even then, when he asked me if I wanted to end it, my first reaction had been vehement denial.
But that didn’t mean that Landen still felt the same after spending the week in Oregon with nothing but radio silence from me.
I stepped out of the car and walked up the steps to the front door of Landen’s house. I’d barely rung the doorbell when he appeared in the entrance. His eyes moved over me, starting at the top of my head and ending at my feet with the pale lilac polish on my toes.
“Hey,” I said awkwardly.
“Hi,” he replied, stepping back and gesturing for me to come inside.
I stepped into the house, enjoying the cool air and the light, fresh scent that filled the house. His cleaning service must have come by yesterday because I could smell the geranium-scented cleaning supplies Landen preferred.
I watched as he tucked his hands into his pockets. He wore a pair of faded jeans that were battered and a soft white tee. His feet were bare and his hair was a mess. He also looked just as tired and haggard as I did.
Some of my nerves faded. He was just as much of a mess as I was.
“Are you thirsty?” he asked politely, his eyes locking on my face.
I shook my head.
“Why don’t we go into the living room so we can…” He paused and inhaled deeply. “Talk.”
I followed his lead into the large room. The afternoon sunlight filled the space, but it was still cool despite the brightness.
Landen sprawled in one of the armchairs facing the sofa and I sat primly on the cushions, my hands clasped over my knees. Damn, this was weird, awkward, and I was growing increasingly uncomfortable.
He watched me for a long moment, his dark eyes taking in every detail of my appearance before he finally spoke. “You wanted to talk?”
I lifted a hand and tucked my hair behind my ear. “Yes.” The problem was that I didn’t know where to start. I saw his expression closing down and thought, Fuck it.
I’d always been honest with him from the beginning, so I wasn’t going to change that approach now.
“When I found out you lied to me…it fucking hurt, Landen,” I began. His jaw grew tight but I continued before he could respond. “I was angry, yes, but that was nothing compared to the feeling I had when Maris explained who she was. I knew, in that instant, that I wasn’t falling in love with you. I was in love with you. You had the power to break my heart. I also started wondering what else you might be lying to me about.”
Landen’s face grew attentive and his focus on me sharpened as I spoke. He sat up straighter in his chair, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “I haven’t lied to you about anything else, Chelsea,” he stated, his voice low.
I sighed. “I want to believe you, Landen, but you also have to understand that the trust we were building, it’s damaged now. Not broken, but definitely cracked. Having an ex-wife isn’t a huge secret. And neither is having a female business partner. But when she’s both and you’re asking a woman to move in with you, well, it’s not something you should keep from her.”
“I know,” Landen replied.
“I know you do. I just need you to understand why I was so upset. And I need to know that you will never do something like that again. Unfortunately, because my trust in you is broken, I’m not sure I can just take your word for it.”
He flinched at my words. “So that’s it?”
I shook my head. Shit, I was fucking this all up. I didn’t come here to rake him over the coals again. I shifted to the edge of the couch. “Look, I want to be able to trust you. I want to be able to move forward. And I’m going to work for it. But I have to know that you’re going to work for it too.”
; The rigidity of Landen’s posture faded somewhat at my statement. “You didn’t come here to end things?”
“No, I came to talk, just like I said. You respected me enough to give me some time to think this week and I want to show you the same respect by talking to you about what happened. I’m accepting your apology and I want to move forward, but you have to understand that I’m going to have some issues trusting you for a while. Not because I’m holding a grudge or because I want to hurt you. But if I expect you to be completely honest with me, I have to return that to you.”
“But you said I was in love with you. Not that you are in love with me.” His eyes were intent on me, peering into my soul as though he would find the answers he sought just by looking.
Trust Landen to notice my use of the past tense. It hadn’t even been intentional. “I am in love with you, Landen. You made a mistake, a big one, but that doesn’t mean I decided that I didn’t love you anymore.”
“You wouldn’t talk to me,” he stated, almost like an accusation. “I thought that it was over, that you were dumping me.”
I shook my head. “I’m sorry if that hurt you. I learned the hard way that I need space when I’m angry or hurt. If I don’t take time to calm down, I do or say things that I deeply regret later. Words can’t be taken back. I can apologize for them when they hurt someone, but the specter will always be there. The echo never fades. Even if the other person forgives me, even if they move past the words, neither of us will forget them. And because I was so upset, I needed more than a few hours or even a day.”
Tension that I hadn’t noticed earlier vanished from Landen’s frame and the tightness around his eyes vanished.
When I saw it, I felt even worse about everything that happened between us on Monday. For all his confidence and intelligence, Landen could be hurt just as easily as I was.
“I’m sorry,” I murmured.
He shook his head. “No, you were honest with me and I didn’t take your words at face value. I thought you were using them to get away from me. I should have known better.” He rose from his chair and came over to the coffee table, perching on the edge of it so he faced me. His knees were on the outside of mine, not touching but close. “Where do we go from here?”
I stared at his face, noting that he looked exhausted. I hated to push him when it was clear that he was feeling as rough as I was, but I had to. “Have you lied to me about anything else? Or left out any other ex-wives slash business partners that I need to know about?”
He shook his head. Though the corner of his mouth lifted slightly, his eyes were somber.
“Then maybe you should tell me more about Maris. How you met, how long you were married, why you got divorced.”
He eyed the couch. “Can I sit next to you? This is going to be a long story and this coffee table isn’t comfortable.”
I nodded and shifted on the sofa. I wedged my back into the corner, toed off my sandals, and lifted my feet from the floor so I sat cross-legged on the cushions. My dress was fit-and-flare, so the skirt was loose and I arranged it so it covered most of my legs. If this was going to be a long story, I wanted to be comfortable.
Landen settled on the cushion next to me, turned so that he could rest his left elbow on the back of the couch and propped his head on his hand. Then he launched right in.
“I met Maris my junior year of college and immediately liked her. We got along well and she liked the same things I did. She was also smart enough to keep me on my toes and beautiful.”
I suppressed the wince that wanted to take over my face at his words. Maris sounded like an absolute paragon. I wanted to dislike her even more now.
Then he continued and I changed my mind.
“But I didn’t realize that what I felt for her was more platonic than sexual. We had sex, yes, and it was nice, but it wasn’t…” He trailed off when he saw the expression on my face. “Too much info?”
I nodded and shifted topics. “How long were you married?”
“We married right after we both graduated and divorced two years later. Through it all, we never stopped being friends or business partners. We just stopped being everything else. It was Maris who pointed it out. She said she wanted a husband, not a best friend and roommate with occasional benefits. She wanted to feel passionately for someone and felt we were doing ourselves a disservice by remaining married. We weren’t unhappy. Nor were we happy. We just were. She didn’t demand half of everything in the divorce, though she did tell me she wanted to remain on at the business. I agreed she should because she’s damn good at her job.”
Okay, so now I liked her again.
“After we were done, I might have gone a little wild and I realized what she meant when she said something was missing. That sex wasn’t an itch to be scratch, but that it should be exciting and breathtaking. But it wasn’t enough. I didn’t understand why it wasn’t, but I got off the carousel. I dated, even had a couple of girlfriends, but I never found that missing piece she kept talking about until I met you.”
He had my complete attention now.
He laughed without true humor. “It was my past dating experience that made me screw up, you know. The last woman I was seeing regularly knew Maris. Hell, Maris was the one who set us up. But for some reason she just couldn’t let it go. She couldn’t handle the fact that I worked with my ex-wife and had to travel with her on business. She got so jealous that she even showed up at the office and caused a huge scene.”
I cocked my head to the side. “Yeah, about that. How come I never saw Maris when I was at your office with Chris?”
A dull flush spread across Landen’s cheeks. “I might have arranged that.”
I shook my head. Despite the fact that his machinations were sneaky and underhanded, his dedication was kind of impressive. If it hadn’t been so dishonest, anyway.
Landen leaned toward me. “I will never hide things from you again, Chelsea. Except maybe the occasional Christmas or birthday gift.”
“And I won’t freeze you out either,” I promised. “I may still need space when I get angry, but I won’t cut you off.”
He relaxed fully then, the tension in his shoulders and jaw vanishing. “So, what do we do now?”
Hesitantly, I leaned forward and cupped his cheek with my hand. “You look as tired as I feel,” I commented. “I missed you this week. Especially when I was trying to sleep at night.” Somehow I’d gotten so used to sleeping next to him that I had trouble getting comfortable in the bed without him.
“You want to take…a nap?” he asked, staring at me in consternation.
I smiled. “Definitely. After that, we’ll see.”
Landen studied me for a long moment. “Then I guess we should go upstairs.”
I followed him out of the living room and up the steps to his bedroom. We climbed under the blankets on his humongous mattress and I scooted over until I was pressed against his side. Landen’s arm was beneath my neck, curving around my back so that his hand rested on my hip, and my cheek lay on his shoulder.
“I love you, you know,” he murmured as we settled into each other, the quiet of the house surrounding us with peace.
“I love you too,” I replied.
I relaxed into his body, knowing that we would figure it out. Despite everything, I didn’t want a life without Landen in it, so that was the only choice I wanted to make. Then I closed my eyes and let myself drift off to sleep.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
I awoke to a hand stroking up and down on my bare thigh. Still hazy from the nap, I remained still and enjoyed the way my skin heated beneath the touch. I was warm and comfortable and felt the steady rise and fall of Landen’s chest beneath my cheek.
The light pouring through the windows seemed to gild the room with gold. We must have slept for several hours. I felt more rested than I had since the day Landen left.
The leisurely slide of his palm on my thigh changed as it glided upward so that his fingers skimmed the bottom edge of my pantie
s, skating close to my core.
I sucked in a deep breath and opened my eyes, tilting my head back to look at him.
“Hey,” he whispered.
“Hey.”
His dark blue eyes were sleepy and hot, staring at me with both reverence and hunger. The arm beneath my neck shifted and his other hand tangled in my hair, tugging lightly so that I arched my neck back even more.
“I want to touch you,” he murmured, his voice rough with sleep and desire.
“I want to touch you too.”
He shifted beneath me, turning his body toward me and lifting my leg so that my thigh rested on his hip. As his lower body came into contact with mine, I could feel the hard length of him against my abdomen.
I slipped my hand beneath the hem of his t-shirt so that my palm rested against his side. His skin was hot and firm under my fingers. His muscles trembled against my palm as my hand moved up and around until I could knead the muscles beneath his shoulder blade.
His gaze never left mine as he used his gentle hold on my hair to lift my face toward his. With our eyes still open, our lips touched, tentatively at first.
After a week of feeling hollow and lonely, it wasn’t long before I opened my mouth and touched the tip of my tongue to his lips. I didn’t even notice when my eyes grew heavy and shut because my entire being was focused on the warm press of his lips and the soft, wet swipe of his tongue against mine.
His free hand slid up my leg, over my hip, to the back of my dress. I heard the quiet rasp of the zipper as he drew it down. I shifted against him as I tugged my arms free from the straps and he helped me push the material down to my waist. The bra I wore beneath the light cotton was nothing more than a concoction of mesh and lace. It was too hot for anything more substantial.
Landen’s fingers curled into the material at my waist and pushed further until I had to bend my knees to free my legs from the bunched fabric of the dress.
Suddenly eager to feel his skin against mine, I grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it up, our lips breaking apart as he lifted his upper body and tugged it over his head.