by R. W. Holmes
“I-I was summoned” she started. “By a human, named-,”
“TO EARTH!?” bellowed War.
The imp felt her body tense up and attempt to void itself once more, but unlike before there was no longer anything to rid itself of.
“No” she said shrilly. “We were in a, a space thing? And there was this magic window, and I could see Earth, because we were in space outside of it.”
War's face screwed up in confusion. “What!?” he sputtered eventually. “What are you... The summoning! You saw it, right? The endless universe, the twisting aether of existence itself, in all of its glorious forms!”
The imp nodded. “I saw it, and I saw the big black orb and the iris when the human and I touched hands for the first time.”
“YES!” cried War, his voice making his tower tremble as it echoed up and out, before spreading into the air and finding ears for miles, which in itself halted the actions of every demon in earshot. He hugged the imp close to himself, overcome by the emotional stirring in his blackened heart brought about by the prospect of something, anything, happening again.
“Did I do good?” the imp asked fearfully.
War released the the imp from his grasp and let her back down to the floor of his now-lit palace. He wore a wide, gladdened grin now, and the lines in his face became more subtle, as if the news alone had restored his vitality.
“You, nameless one, are my new champion” he said triumphantly. “Hell itself weighs on your shoulders now, and never has one of such low stature had to bear such a mantle, but the times are so... I must teach you a spell now to contact me from that side, so that I might speak with the magnificent man who managed all of this when he summons you again.”
The imp's eyes lit up. “I'm going to learn something!?” she said in astonishment. “From you!?”
“You're going to learn more than that” replied War. “There are many who would see our kind never return to that glorious place of purpose, and they would kill your new master to do so. You are his strength, and so you must now protect him.”
The imp stared up at War, a look of legitimate concern over what he'd just said written all over her face.
“I'm an imp” she said pessimistically.
“Correct” replied War. “But long ago, your kind's guile and craftiness was enough to slay even the greatest of foes. Now prepare thyself for the unholy secrets about to be entrusted to you. Your summoner, and only your summoner, must be allowed this secret.”
Far from the planes of hell, in a place equally strange but far more familiar, Gael and Angelica finished watching the live stream of their sociology class. The two sat in silence as it ended, wishing their reprieve from the hectic madness they'd experienced an hour ago would continue for just a while longer.
“I could just never do it again” said Gael. “I could pretend I never made it work in the first place, and then neither of us would have to pretend any of this ever happened.”
Angelica nodded silently, completely oblivious to what Gael had actually said, before turning to him and saying, “I wanna see it.”
Gael grimaced. “I don't suppose you're just blackmailing me right now?” he said hopefully.
“Huh?” Angelica queried confusedly. “Ugh, no! Gross! You're going to summon it again though, right?”
Gael frowned. He knew he should say no, but his legs were already carrying him off of his bed and over to the summoning circle. Everything had been displaced by the imp's frantic behavior earlier, but was otherwise salvageable and easily rearranged back into its proper location for another go.
“Computer, play the song” said Gael. “You know the one.”
Angelica flinched as Black Betty started.
“Really?” she said incredulously. “This is the music you use?”
“I didn't use stuff to summon a demon” replied Gael. “I put stuff that had to do with me into the bowl. I don't know why it worked, alright? It just did. Now hold on and just... make sure the door stays locked.”
Angelica sighed and rolled her eyes, but complied with the request anyway.
Gael steadied his mind and said the words, “Demon! Recognize my offering to you! See myself as it is, and you who are equal, show yourself!” Then, Gael remembered his comment about meeting halfway from last time, and revised the ending to, “Meet me at the crossroads!”
Angelica yelped as Gael suddenly vanished. “Oh my gosh! What's happening!” she said in surprise, before quietly realizing that she was screaming at no one but herself now. 'What am I supposed to do now?' she thought fretfully to herself.
Then, Gael popped back into being at the spot he'd departed from, and the force of it happening sent him skidding back across the room. In the center of the circle, among the copper, and the lead, and the eagle feathers, and Gael's blood; was the imp, back from her trip to the worst of all afterlives.
“Good timing” the imp said with a smile. “I just finished.”
Gael shook his head as he got his senses back.
“Finished what?” he and Angelica asked in unison.
“With War” replied the imp. “He wants to talk to you. He taught me how.”
Gael narrowed his eyes thoughtfully, and then replied with a very tepid, “No.”
“Oh...” murmured the imp, unsure of how to respond. “Later?”
“Maybe” replied Gael. “Just... I don't know if you're safe, right? A moment ago you didn't know that killing us would be a bad thing.”
“That was at least an hour ago” said Angelica.
“Not helping” snapped Gael.
“I'm very young” the imp argued. “Which means I can wait. Are you young? You're not going to die soon are you? How long do you have to live?”
“Another hundred and twenty five years, on average” replied Gael. “What does that have to do with anything?”
The imp shrugged. “I can't come here anymore if you die” she said honestly.
“What, you don't like hell?” Angelica queried in surprise. “But you're a demon. Hell is where you belong.”
“Yeah, and it sucks” said the imp. “Everything is the same. Everyone is the same. You two are, like, completely different, and you're the same species. That's the most amazing thing I've ever seen! Do you have a name too?”
“Of course I have a name” replied Angelica. “It's Angelica. What's yours?”
The imp shrugged again. “Only the powerful demons have names” she said plainly. “I'm just a nobody. Wait, no! I'm War's champion now. Maybe I should have a name.”
“Okay Gael, I'm sorry, this thing is harmless” said Angelica. “Where's the evil? Where's the wickedness, and wanting to corrupt everything?”
“I don't know, but you're getting ahead of yourself. She hasn't been here for more than an hour yet!” Gael said frankly. “She did try to leave earlier when I told her not to, but I guess she has to do what I say.”
“That's right” said the imp. “War says I have to protect you.”
“Protect Gael? From what?” asked Angelica.
“Can we forget about War for now!?” Gael exclaimed angrily. “I really do need to know if the little monster I pulled from actual Hell is dangerous or not. Don't you remember what she asked when I first brought you here? She wanted to know if she was supposed to kill you.”
The imp turned her attention away from Gael and Angelica then as the two argued over whether or not she was acting more like a monster or a guard dog, and focused in on the live stream feed instead.
“Hey, do the window thing again!” she called out to the wall.
The computer in the room decoded the oddly framed request for what it was, and gave her the view of the Earth once more.
“There! That!” exclaimed Angelica. “How could that be bad?”
Gael's unamusement erupted into the most indignant look Angelica had ever seen. “Imp demon girl thing, what do you eat?” he asked instead.
The imp shrugged. “There isn't really anything to eat in hell
, so you usually end up eating someone else. Or getting eaten yourself.”
“Okay, fair point, but, she didn't have any other choice” said Angelica. “I'm sure she didn't like eating her own kind.”
“Oh we barely ever did that” said the imp. “The most fun we'd have was getting tons of us together and bringing down one of the bigger ones, like an incubus, or a goat.”
“What, like just an animal goat?” Angelica queried hopefully. “Or were these other demons?”
“Other demons” said the imp. “What do humans taste like?”
“Yeah okay this is pretty bad...” admitted Angelica. “She's just so naive. I feel like we can shape her into something better.”
“She's a demon, Angelica, not some angsty bad boy for you to fix” chided Gael. “If we mess up, someone might die. Or get maimed. Or... God! I don't even know what she's capable of!”
“Apparently all the fun stuff” mused the imp. “You left out rape, though.”
“OH MY GOD!” Angelica screamed in horror. “YOU RAPE PEOPLE!? BUT... BUT YOU'RE A GIRL!”
“I rape, I get raped, that's pretty much just how things go down in hell” said the imp. “Except the succubi and the incubi. It's not rape if they don't fight back.”
“Well?” Gael said to Angelica. “Do you see what I'm scared of now?”
“Geeze, and you were going to tell Ms. Thomas about this thing...” murmured Angelica.
“Yeah, I'm not doing that anymore” Gael said reassuringly. “I need to get all of this under control right, and I hate to say it, but that probably means I'm gonna have to talk to this War guy at some point.”
“Yeah, the horseman” said Angelica. “Of the Apocalypse. I don't have to be here for that, right?”
“Nah, I just needed someone to know...” replied Gael. “Thanks for taking it so well, by the way. Do me another favor and make sure I'm not dead or, shit, being raped before curfew, okay? And who knows, maybe you're right? Imp over there said that only the four horsemen were left and the rest had wasted away.”
“Yep” said the imp. “I spawned right near the Chasm of Belial in hell.”
“Wait, does that mean Satan is dead?” asked Angelica.
“You mean Lucifer?” said the imp. “Yeah, he and Michael fought a long time ago. That's kind of how hell ended up this way, but I'm not supposed to talk about it. War said he wanted to explain it to you.”
“Okay, that's it!” Angelica said as she made her way to the exit. “Do the War thing! But be safe. I'm going to feel really bad if you die because I wanted to know more about all of this.”
“Yeah, I'll try” Gael mumbled as Angelica left the room.
The imp hopped up from her seat, all too easily giving up her view of the Earth for Gael's liking, and instead turned her attention back to him.
“First you need an olive branch, cinnabar, and a weapon stained in demon's blood; and then you put all that in a bowl” the imp said to Gael. “Plus, you need a mercury-filled plate to be placed atop the bowl.”
“Cinnabar is toxic, though” said Gael.
“Yeah, if you eat it” the imp said in amusement. “I would know. War called me an idiot when I tried.”
“Okay, new order, don't eat anything you're not supposed to” said Gael.
“What if I don't know?” asked the imp.
“You ask me or another human” said Gael. “But only if you already know the human. Now! Matter printer, override safety, print a pinch of cinnabar, an olive branch, and a, uh... a dagger, as well as a cup of mercury and a metal plate to go with it.”
The matter printer's opaque door lit up with a two minute timer, and Gael turned his attention back to the imp.
“Can he do anything to me while we're talking?” he asked her. “Like, can he kill me? Or can he order you to kill me?”
“I don't know” the imp replied innocently. “But I think he can't kill you. As in, even if he can and wants to, he still can't. You're the only one who can summon demons right now, so if you die, he has nothing.”
The shrewder, more analytical side of Gael's brain kicked into gear then, and suddenly he was absolutely confident that things would be fine.
Ding!
Gael hurriedly removed his newly printed ingredients and dumped the old contents of his offering bowl into the trash. He quickly added the cinnabar, without touching it to be safe, and the olive branch, before passing the dagger to the imp.
“Demon's blood” he said to her. “The matter printer doesn't know how to make that stuff, so... you know.”
“Right” the imp said as she slit her palm and tossed the dagger into the bowl. “The spell is 'Lord of the bloodthirsty, sire of war dogs and anguish alike, cry out from the pits of the first circle and speak with me.'”
“Okay...” Gael said as he fixed the plate into place. “And that will work?”
“Sort of” the imp offered awkwardly. “I guess you're supposed to draw power from me, or something. War says that I'm your familiar now, and that through me you draw power from hell itself.”
“Does that mean I'm supposed to do something special?” asked Gael.
The imp sighed and took a seat opposite Gael. “I don't know anything about anything” she said honestly. “Actually, that's not true... Is it weird that I can sense you're squeamish about blood? Not in a weird way, but somehow I know you'd really hate to drink it.”
“That's a pretty normal sentiment” said Gael.
“Not where I come from” the imp replied mischievously. “And that Angelica girl, she hates toffee. Trust me.”
Gael shook his head and finished double checking that everything was set up properly, as well as that the wax baphomet symbol itself didn't have any cracks in it, before lightning the candles and beginning the ritual.
“Dim lights, please” he called out.
The imp smiled, and in that smile was reflected her naive brand of wonder as the lights dimmed of their own accord.
“Lord of the bloodthirsty, sire of war dogs and anguish alike, cry out from the fire of the first circle and speak with me” said Gael.
Nothing happened, and Gael immediately recognized it for the bad sign it was.
“Alright, come over here” Gael said to the imp.
“What, why?” the imp asked as she made her way over anyway.
“Because I don't know how this works” said Gael. “But I'm going to start with physical contact. Come on, join hands.”
“Oh, I like this” the imp said as she eagerly clasped Gael's hand. “It reminds me of when we met. I'd never felt that way before. I was actually flying, and it felt even more like I was flying inside me.”
“I guess you were pretty happy then” said Gael.
“I gue-,” the imp started.
“Lord of the bloodthirsty, sire of war dogs and anguish alike, cry out from the fire of the first circle and speak with me!”
The candles around the offering flickered, before their flames turned red, and the mercury in the plate became awash with ripples as its reflective surface came to reflect something new.
“Ah, good” called War, his eldritch face now visible from within the mercury. “And so quickly, too. You live up to your reputation.”
Gael's face screwed up in confusion. “I have a reputation?” he said incredulously.
“The last demon ever summoned was summoned in the year nineteen forty-eight” replied War. “This happened four years after the conclusion of Michael and Lucifer's fight, which lasted nearly four years itself. Since then, all of Hell has been left to rot without its fallen archangel lord to go up and train a new generation of warlocks when the last one was destroyed. The fool had killed off all his brethren in an attempt to consolidate the powers of Hell for himself...”
“Sounds like you guys had a lot of problem with greed” said Gael.
“Yes, Mr. Walsh, we did” replied War. “We also believed in quality over quantity, but such ideas don't fit our current situation. We need thousands of warloc
ks, constantly teaching others, and ushering thousands more demons out into the world to do Hell's bidding.”
“Okay, quick question, why would I want to help with that?” asked Gael. “I mean, no offense, but I'm kind of your enemy.”
“I am a force of the end times, child” replied War. “God himself will send someone to call for me when those times come, but until then, Hell has a purpose to fulfill.”
Gael frowned. “I don't understand.”
“Of course you do!” snapped War. “Hell must punish the souls of the wicked! There are those out there who would steal them for their own gain, and Hell will not have it!”
“Whoa wait, WHAT!?” shrieked Gael. “I don't know what reality you're living in, but there's nothing like that going on around here, okay? It's the year 4008, we'd know.”
“You didn't know demons were real” said the imp.
“And you wouldn't know about the Fae or the R'lyehans” War insisted gravely. “They have a knack for deception, both of them, and while one ferries spirits to elsewhere, the other peddles immortality like it's a damned candied apple!”
Gael laughed and shook his head incredulously. “This is ridiculous!”
“War says that if they knew about you they'd want to kill you” said the imp.
“Why!? I don't care about any of this!” Gael exclaimed indignantly. “I just wanted to have some fun with my thesis!”
“Because you represent a chance for a lost faction to reenter the game” War explained casually, before finding his serious tone once more and adding, “And you can not imagine how badly I want to play again, or how badly they want to keep me out.”
“No! I'm not being a part of this!” Gael declared with finality. “I'm not some puppet for you to use to do your bidding.”
“Fine” said War, clearly unfazed by the declaration. “But you will have to learn to protect yourself, and to use the power that imp grants you. If you don't, and you are found by the others, you will die.”
“Right, okay then” Gael said as he reached out and grasped the mercury-filled plate with both of his hands. “I'll do it on my own.”