There’s also a hint of nostalgia in the way she says my name. And a hint of pain.
Good. I hope she feels fucking miserable. After the way she just up and left me, sending me here then never showing, I hope she’s suffered through every single fucking day of the last seven years. Just like I have.
I sigh and look back at her. “What, Kat? I’m not in the mood to play your games.”
Her eyes drop to my cock, and I don’t even try to hide the fact that I’m hard. What does she expect? She looks just as fucking hot as she ever did.
Time’s been good to her. Besides, it’s not like she doesn’t know what kind of effect she’s always had on me.
“Jason,” she says again, standing this time and closing the distance between us. “I got your message.”
I look closely at her, seeing the same woman I knew seven years ago. But I see something else too—something new. She looks almost…haunted.
Well, welcome to the fucking club, baby.
The ghost of this woman—of us—has followed me around like a fucking albatross. All the things I could have done differently. The choices we should have made.
Fuck.
I draw in a sharp breath when she places a hand on my chest in a gesture so intimate, so familiar, it’s like no time has passed.
How is it possible for her to still have this effect on me? She’s sucking me into her clutches, I can almost feel it, with a single goddamn touch. It’s like she’s casting some kind of spell over me.
Kat reaches up with her other hand and runs her fingers across my stubble jaw.
And I can’t take it. I fucking snap.
Too many nights of what ifs and could have beens are enough to make me see this for what it is.
A chance to make things right.
I don’t know what brought her here, and I don’t even fucking know what kind of chance we could even have after all this time.
The only thing I know is that there’s never been another woman like Kat. And I’d be a fucking idiot to walk away from her right now.
It’s like something in my brain shifts, and I stop thinking. I act on pure instinct, forgetting everything about why we’re actually here together.
Grabbing Kat’s hips, I dig my fingers deeply into the soft flesh and yank her hard against me. She’s not prepared for it, and she stumbles forward, clutching my arms to steady herself.
But it doesn’t matter because I’ve got her right where I want her—wedged up against me, my cock straining against her bare stomach, and those gorgeous tits pressed into my chest.
“Fuck, Kat,” I growl. I can feel how hard her nipples are through the thin fabric of her swimsuit. “Look what you do to me.”
One fucking look at her. That’s all it takes.
She lets out this sexy little whimper as she shamelessly rubs her body against mine. It’s like fucking muscle memory. Our bodies recognize each other, drawn together like magnets, responding with an intensity that takes me by surprise.
I’ve always told myself that if I ever saw her again, I wouldn’t do this. I wouldn’t go down this same tired road with her.
Lies, all of it.
Because now that I have her here in my arms again? I know exactly what to do with her.
Driving my hands into her long waves, I fist my fingers in the strands and yank her head back, forcing her to look at me. The gasp that escapes her lips makes me even harder.
I rock my hips into hers, wanting her so fucking bad. Then I lower my head, crushing my mouth to hers in a kiss that unleashes an unstoppable ache for more.
And I know it’s a mistake because this woman is my kryptonite. I’m like an addict finally giving in after seven years of sobriety.
But I don’t fucking care.
Kat will be mine.
Forever.
I’ll make goddamn sure of it this time.
Starting right the fuck now.
Kat
I want to be Jason’s.
All over again. Like the way we were before. My eyes droop in the pleasure that’s going to come in just a few seconds as his hard body begins to envelop me.
“Don’t you fucking close your eyes, Kat,” he says gruffly, and I feel his hands squeeze my ass harder. I squirm as my eyes open. I look him deep in his blue eyes, and I can’t help myself.
I’m lost—transported back seven years ago.
When we were happy.
Before everything went to hell.
Jason used to work for my father back then. That’s before Maurice’s men killed Daddy. I wonder to myself if Jason had still been working as Daddy’s bodyguard if he would have allowed the two black Lincoln Continentals to pull up on opposite sides of Daddy’s Mercedes as it idled at a red light on 76th and 5th Avenue.
Would Jason have been in the back seat?
No, he always insisted on driving Daddy when he was the bodyguard.
He probably would have seen something suspicious immediately. He probably wouldn’t have waited for the windows on both cars to roll down. He probably would have peeled out long before the guns were drawn and hundreds of bullets from automatic rifles were unloaded into Daddy’s white Mercedes Maybach right there in broad daylight.
A gangland hit, the newspapers had called it. Unseen in the modern era of New York City with the clean streets and broken windows method of policing. Well, this was broken windows, alright.
Jason would have stopped it if he were there.
But he wasn’t. He had already left.
Or…I had told him to go. The thing is, I never expected that he would stay away. I never expected that I wouldn’t see him.
I thought that we would be separated for a while, that I’d be able to meet him there when the dust settled after I told Daddy about us. He told me he loved me. He told me that he couldn’t live his life without me.
I was so stupid to send him away.
But things didn’t go the way I thought they would.
I told myself so many things during those first months.
I told myself that it was the best thing to do. That a mob princess wasn’t supposed to fall in love with her father’s bodyguard. That I was only doing what Daddy wanted when he forced me to stop seeing Jason. Kept me from following behind.
I told myself that we would never be happy. That I was going to college. I was going to leave this world of crime, I was going to marry a Vanderbilt or an Astor, and my husband would be senator.
Yeah. More like I was going to cry into my pillow for two years and then pine for the other five.
Until today. When I saw Jason.
My legs are shaking as I take in his scent. I can’t believe what’s happening. I want to hold onto this moment forever. I want to grab it and never let it go.
Because if I do—if I close my eyes for just one second—I’ll lose it.
“Jason,” I say slowly, my eyes looking into his. I can feel his hard cock pressing against my body. My barely there bikini is ready to fall off, and I honestly couldn’t care less who is around us.
No one else exists when I’m with him.
Jason only replies by pulling me closer, if possible.
“Jason, I want to say,” I start, not knowing what exactly to say but knowing I need to say it. “I want to say I’m sorry.”
His gaze changes. If anything, I can see him thinking.
Jason’s not a stupid man. He’s actually done quite well for himself after he was cast out by the family.
I knew he was always capable of so much more than what he was doing. He was never meant to be just a bodyguard. Just like he was never meant to be more than just a low-level enforcer.
But Jason had a hard life. Orphaned when he was five years old, he was taken in by the family. Raised as a future soldier.
By the time he was eighteen years old, he had made a name for himself on the streets. He ran the largest weapons running ring in the Tri-State Area—all under the watchful auspices of Daddy.
It was his guile and
perseverance that first made Daddy bring him into our inner circle. To trust his life in Jason’s hands.
I knew that Daddy was old-school through and through. To him, it was inconceivable that a mob princess like myself would ever deign to associate with someone that did the dirty work. But I didn’t care back then.
I still don’t.
“I just want you to know, Jason, that I…I love you,” I say almost shyly.
He looks at me.
“I fucking love you, Kat,” he says to me. “I love you fucking forever and fucking always. Don’t you ever fucking forget that.”
This moment is perfect.
More than I ever hoped for.
I don’t think I could have even imagined it any better.
And that’s when the gunshots ring out.
The glass shatters on the bar next to us.
It only takes a second for Jason to look around and see what’s going on. There’s screaming and yelling.
I’m frozen.
“Get the fuck down!” he yells, throwing me to the ground. “Now!”
Jason
“Get the fuck down! Now!” I shout, instinctively placing one hand on Kat’s neck and forcing her to crouch. I hear more gunshots, the quick rat-tat-tat of semi-automatic guns drowning my thoughts and allowing instinct to kick in.
Reaching behind my back, I grab my Colt, my fingers tightening around the cold metal as my heart pumps boiling blood through my veins.
By the time I’m done, there’ll be a body count.
Grabbing Kat by the wrist, I drag her behind the counter and release the safety of my gun, my back pressed against the wall.
“Jason, no!” she whispers, looking straight at me. Her face is as white as the first snow of December, and her eyes are wide with terror. Even though she grew up used to violence and corruption, she sure as fuck isn’t used to having a target on her back.
No wonder. She’s been trying to lead a normal life for years now—a life that wasn’t supposed to involve me.
But I’m here now.
And I’ll be damned if I’ll let anyone come between Kat and me. Point a gun at her, and you’ve just signed your fucking death sentence.
“I don’t want to lose you,” she tells me again, placing one hand on my chest, right over my heart. “Not again.”
“You won’t,” I tell her with a slight nod. At the same time, I hear footsteps all around us, shattered glass being stepped on by heavy boots. If I stay here hiding, we’ll be doomed.
I need to act, and I need to do it right now.
I take one quick peek over the counter, and a fraction of a second later, I hear another gunshot. I duck just before a rain of bullets falls against the counter, splinters of wood flying everywhere.
I counted five guys, three of them carrying handguns while the others have sawed-off shotguns. They aren’t after Kat then; if that were the case, they would have just sent one guy.
No, they sent five assholes because they want to put me down. Well, that was a fucking mistake. If you want my head, you better bring an army of sufficient size.
“Don’t move,” I tell Kat as I reach for my boot with my free hand. I grab the small blade I carry there and, still with the Colt in my other hand, I take a deep breath and jump up to my feet.
Moving fast, I cock my left arm back and then throw the knife at the first guy I see. He tries to shoot all the same, but by the time his finger squeezes the trigger, my blade is already buried deep in his neck.
“Get him!” one of them shouts, but I’m too fast.
Digging my heels into the floor, I place the palm of my left hand under the butt of the gun and take aim. The first guy goes down like an empty paper bag, his eyes going vacant the moment my bullet pierces his skull.
I hit the second guy twice—one time on the chest, the other right between the eyes—and then I duck behind the counter once more.
“Jason…” Kat whispers my name, but I can’t bring myself to look at her. I don’t want her to see me like this—the coldhearted man she tried to run away from, a man on a path of violence and chaos.
Rage wells up inside me fast. How do these motherfuckers dare come to me the moment I find Kat? Why are they forcing me to be the old Jason once more?
I’ll make them pay.
I’ll make them fucking pay.
Gritting my teeth, I jump up to my feet once more. The moment I’m standing, I squeeze the trigger on my gun, and the next guy collapses on the floor, a bright red painting his white shirt.
Jumping over the counter, I run straight toward the last man standing, and I take hold of his shotgun before he has the time to do anything.
“Don’t you fuckin’ move,” I growl, pressing my Colt right between his eyes. I’m so close to him now that I can smell the fear.
“P-please,” he stammers, and that just makes me want to squeeze the trigger even more. I know I should be asking questions, but right now I just want to make him pay for putting Kat’s life in danger.
Fuck all questions, and fuck all answers.
“Jason, no!” I hear Kat say behind me, her mellow voice calming down all the rage consuming me from the inside out. “Don’t...don’t be that man,” she urges me, slowly placing her hand over mine and forcing me to lower the gun.
As I do it, I feel a glimmer of hope inside me. Maybe Kat’s right—maybe I don’t need to be the old Jason. Maybe I can be the right man for her to love.
With her by my side, I can change. I know that.
“Go back,” I growl at the man cowering in front of me. “Tell everyone—come after me and you better bring a second army…one just to bury the bodies.”
Emptying the shotgun, I throw it to the floor and then stash my Colt back on my belt. “Let’s go,” I tell Kat, lacing my fingers with hers and dragging her out of this ruin of a place.
“Let’s go,” she whispers softly, running her tongue between her lips.
For a fraction of a second, I can’t help but believe it.
Maybe this time we can be together.
Kat
Jason’s tongue on mine is the salve to near any situation. Even danger. Even ones that remind me of everything that I’ve tried to leave behind.
I let my fingers belong to his, let my mouth belong to him, and I’m safe again for a moment.
A moment is all it takes.
A moment took away the one person who meant the most to me, and a moment can give him back. Remembering what we had, what I might have in him again? Sometimes that’s all that keeps me going.
When I finally need to breathe again, I don’t let go of Jason. Because as much as I need him, that’s how much he needs me. I breathe him in, inhaling the taste of not just his lips but also his pain. His suffering. His struggle.
I mean, if I had any humor in this situation right now, I’d think how foolish those people are to mess with a man who is a deadly weapon. I’m not just talking about what my hands go to grip beneath his belt.
Jason is dangerous. He could kill all of them and do away with their backup and their backup’s backup. But I don’t find anything funny in this.
I know Jason doesn’t either. That’s why he tries to be a better man, even if he can’t see it. A life still has value to him.
A wild flutter in my chest tells me that after all this time apart, my body and my heart know that it’s always been Jason.
I want him to be mine, forever. I want a family. Something I never thought I’d say. I know Jason wants it, too, someday, though he fears what kind of father he’d be.
Jason finally stops ravaging my mouth, only to move his kisses to my neck. We’re tucked away somewhere in the shadows of the building now, far from the hail of gunshots that could have killed us both.
Jason has me. I’m safe. I realize I don’t fear anything when I’m with him.
No. I just trust in him, and it makes me lighter and safer and freer than I’ve ever felt before. Even though he’s one of the most dangerous men I know.
His mouth on my neck makes me shiver. His words take a moment to sink in before I realize the meaning of what he’s saying. I’m so caught up in sensations.
“Told myself I’d never let you near anything like that again,” Jason growls against my skin.
I feel his teeth nipping at my flesh, a stinging sensation sharp against the once-tender kisses. He gets back to the way he tenderly touched me, but there’s a possessiveness in how he holds me now that reveals the raging fire inside.
“Jason, I know…” I say, but I already know my placating words aren’t enough to calm him.
I put my hand on his heart. My fingers find his chin. “Jason,” I say, my words like a prayer.
This is all that ever calms him. And when we were apart, it was what I craved more than the feel of him between my thighs or the way he breathed into my neck when he came inside me.
No, I missed this strength we find together more than anything, and I say this as a woman who has had her eyes regularly roll back in her head from being fucked by this man.
Loving someone, even someone who fucks you incredibly, is so much more than anything else.
“Jason, we have this.” The words are almost stupid, I know. But these were the first words I said to him the first time I saw a wildfire in his eyes that neither of us knew how to put out.
Something between us clicked, locked, and fell into place, and that’s who we are now. The span of years means nothing.
Jason’s hand closes over mine, fingertips softly brushing my skin. The need is there, but it isn’t cloying at him and taking over his actions, his thoughts.
He’s here with me.
That’s all I’ve ever wanted. I don’t care how silly it sounds.
But something about the air changes. There’s nothing silly in what either of us wants now, no.
Now that the imminent danger has passed, we can revel in the moment. The fact that we’re finally here together again.
Now the want is pure heat, electric lust practically crackling in the space between us. I close that space, crushing my tits against the soft wall of his chest just to feel the two of us closer.
Jason’s fingers tuck under the crook of my chin, and he makes me look up at him. The way he kisses me now isn’t sweet or tame. His tongue doesn’t wait for permission, but my mouth is already open for him.
The Marriage Mistake_A Billionaire Hangover Romance Page 64