I can’t help bursting into tears. Relief sweeps through me like a tidal wave. I wish I had it in me to somehow help him, but I can’t see me staying here with the very person who destroyed everything and letting him extract pieces of me. And my sister and father, they need me.
Rune’s hand reaches out and stills over my cheek. “These will be the last tears you cry because of me.” His expression is a mixture of tortured sadness as he wipes away my tears.
His eyes look tired, resigned.
Maybe it’s the way he stands, a tall metallic-clad statue, that I know he’ll be fine. He’s resilient; he’ll figure this all out for his men. His way of life will go on like normal, somehow he’ll fix it all with an upload of some software and everything will be what it was for him.
It’s my life that’s screwed up. And I just have to hope I’ll be able to find Claire and my father, that’s the only thing I can do now. I can’t help Rune when they need me.
His stare locks on mine as I walk backwards and slip through the sliding passage with Jex. Something flits across Rune’s expression, then the door closes, separating us, and something in my heart aches. I’m not going to think about what it is. It’s too intangible and unreal and I need to get back to my sister. I can’t think about Rune.
Jex and I are surrounded by darkness and along with it a hushed hum of machinery and forced air overtake my senses.
“Follow me, Kate.” He says my name like it’s a foreign language and he doesn’t bother to take my hand like Rune did. He could probably leave me here to rot inside of the ship’s walls if he wanted to.
I hope he doesn’t want that.
Stumbling blindly behind him, I say nothing; the only sounds I make are the groans and oomphs when I hit into the corners of the walls I don’t quite see clearly.
At the end of the straightest walkway, he slides open a part of the walls and light spills in from the room outside. Behind him are dozens of aircraft. This hangar doesn’t seem to have any crazy trigger-happy Caelum.
Before he steps through the opening, I catch him studying me. It’s probably the way the dim lights of the hangar drape shadows across his face, but there’s a heaviness to his expression as his eyes travel over my features.
My face heats under the scrutiny. If he never saw a female before, what must he think looking at me?
I look away quickly, wondering. What did Rune think of me?
“Are you afraid?” he asks.
“Only for my sister and father.” The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. “They can’t be alone…I’m the one that needs to take care of them. They’re not…” How do I even explain this to a perfect robotized human? “They’re not made like you were, they need more help than others.”
“You’re leaving the safety of this ship and the General’s guard to save two people.”
“Yes,” I say, swallowing the knot that’s formed hard and thick in my throat.
“And you made the general heal and reestablish men who fought against him?”
Where the hell is he going with this?
“You are fierce.” His words are no louder than a whisper. He sounds surprised—then instantly downtrodden.
He hesitates, but I can’t read his silence.
“Jex?” I ask, “What is it? What are you looking at me for?”
He looks away, then pauses and glances back at me. “Never mind. I am confident General Rune will easily replace you with another acceptable mate.”
My stomach sours and a strange kind of heat flashes across my collarbone. “Yes, all women can easily replace one another, that’s acceptable.” I scoff. “I see you never want to get laid.”
He says nothing, which makes me think he doesn’t understand a sarcastic word I’ve said. “Wait here, female.”
I see the name Kate was just too much for him.
I sigh loudly and watch him run across the huge space and climb into one of the smallest aircraft.
Immediately, a sudden vibration travels over the metal armor I’m wearing. I edge into the hangar, trying to get closer to where I saw Jex go. “Jex?” I hiss. “Jex!”
There’s a closed door to the right of where I’m standing that swishes open, shining a bright light out of its opening.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I just want to get out of here without any hiccups.
I hear a creak, then droning of moving gears.
My eyes dart back and forth from the doorway to the ship, wondering if I make a run for it will someone zap me into dust from behind?
“I wonder, female,” Pious says as he steps through the doorway to face me. “What your thoughts would be if I uploaded Rune’s memories into your armor? I wonder how you would react to what knowledge he has withheld from you.”
Up ahead in the distance, I spot Jex, shifting off the aircraft and slinking into the shadows behind another.
“You mean your brother?”
“Stalling tactic. My scan is telling me your heart rate is accelerating. Are you frightened, female?”
I focus all my attention on Pious. I don’t want him to figure out Jex is in the hangar with us somewhere just because he can read my emotions.
And health status.
And whatever else these idiots can find out with their faceplates on.
“I’m not scared of you.” I try to take control of my thoughts. I think of Claire, and the time we went to a paint and sip party just before the end, she painted a sign that said Girls Rule, Boys Drool. She drank apple juice and spilled it all over her smock.
“I need to get back to my sister, Pious. She needs me.” I step closer to him, staring deadpan into his face armor. “I don’t care about your little mutiny against your general, I need to get to Claire.”
“Mutiny, you say?” Now it’s his turn to step closer, toe-to-toe with me, his face leaning into the crook of my neck, his robotic deep voice humming in my ear. “So you take his side then? Believe he is the ruler of the Caelum?”
I don’t move, I hardly even breathe. I keep thinking of Claire and the blue paint we couldn’t get out of her hair for days last year.
“Rune is too weak, his body too human to do right by the Caelum.”
I should have watched her closer, my mother told me. She was right, of course. I did more sipping than painting with my friends. I was too buzzed to notice Claire dipping her fingers into the paint and running them through the tangled strands of her hair.
Now I need to be there for her.
I can’t leave her there alone.
This isn’t a stupid paint and sip party.
“You think he’ll protect you from me? From all of this? You think you could trust him?” The cool metal of his faceplate presses against my cheek. “He didn’t even tell you your sister is here.”
No. He’s lying. He has to be lying. I’m suddenly dizzy and sick. I stumble over my feet, feeling like the walls are caving in on me.
“Come, Kate, take my hand. I’ll show you.”
36
Rune
I stare at the closed door Kate just walked through. Inside my chest cavity, my organs are shouting for her to come back. Instead I rush up the stairs to the star deck, waiting to see if Jex does as I commanded him to.
In front of me, the cosmos stretches on forever, pressing on my shoulders, squeezing and wringing out my intestines. Mine is the last generation of humans. The last hope we had to survive.
There is much blood on my conscience. I wonder how many were killed.
I press my hands, unsheathed against the cold glass of the viewing window. The sensation is still new to me, feeling the cold against my skin, and it gives me a sickening sort of thrill. Touching what I was always taught I mustn’t.
A cruiser blasts out of the west hangar, far below me. Its propulsion ringing a small vibration of light and sound against the thick barrier of my world. I follow it with my eyes, lusting after its return.
Every cell in my body wants to chase after her, but I th
ink it would be futile. She blames me for the end of everything she’s ever held dear.
She’s right, it’s all my fault and I have no idea how to fix any of it.
But I know, if I ever want to see Kate again, I’m going to have to try.
Part III
Rune
The quiet of the Core is unsettling. The stillness of air and the dimness of the small enclosure add to the disconcerting sensations coursing through me. I’m still not accustomed to all these strange new human sensitivities. Everything I come in contact with is too hot, or too cold, too rough, or too soft. Touch, sound, smell, sight, taste; all of them are waging a war inside me, wreaking havoc over my skin and tongue, across my sight, and vibrating deep inside me. It’s overwhelming every cell in my body.
Especially when I’m near the female.
Kate.
My body floods with remorse, thinking of her wrath when she found out what my original plans were. The part I’ve played in her life getting turned inside out. Can you hate and want at the same time? Is it wrong to desire her rage, lust for her fury?
These human emotions confuse me. Frustrate me.
I don’t know how Kate deals with them all.
The small blinking sensors on the three Caelum that remain with me still flash red. They must have been very close to death to be taking this long to heal.
For generations, my men have been trapped here, far out of reach from where the sun could warm our skin. They must know I was only doing what seemed right for our people. I was trying to be a great leader.
I never meant for anyone to get hurt.
Especially not Kate’s people.
Kate.
My mind keeps roaming back to her, wondering what her fury would feel like if she ever had the chance to unleash it on me.
If we ever meet again.
Behind me the hidden door slides open, followed by the low hum of spinning gears. I know it’s Jex, I don’t bother to turn and greet him. Only my trusted Sentinels know of the passageways in the ship’s walls. And he’s the only one left alive.
“General.”
I don’t know how much time has passed since I ordered him to return the female back to her home. It certainly feels like mere minutes.
Yet a lifetime ago.
Kate.
My fists tighten. I would kill to have her stay with me, to want me. The very thought of never seeing her again…it leaves me feeling hollow inside. I sigh, resigning myself to having to purge my mind of her. There will be an upload for that, I’m sure.
“Jex, what news do you have?” I haven’t put my faceplate armor on. Wearing it makes it hard to tell who is a puppet and who is the puppeteer. I’m exhausted from being both.
“W-we were separated, sir, the female and I.” His voice sounds weak and small, unlike anything I’ve ever heard Jex utter.
I spin on him, and my heart pulses wildly in the back of my throat. “Separated?” I repeat the word as if it would change his answer.
Jex leans heavily on the wall. His armor is blackened and cracked; gears hang off on the ends of long spiraling springs. Then I see blood, thick and red and pouring down his armor.
He falls forward and I lunge for him, slamming his body into the uploading dock. “Jex? Jex! Sentinel?”
The uploading dock flashes bright red, just like for the other Caelum who were hurt before him. Close to death.
“General,” he mumbles hoarsely. “The female…she went with Pious.”
She went with Pious? That can’t happen. This can’t be how it ends.
If he hurts Kate, if he uses her the way he wants, she’s going to beg me to kill her.
37
Kate
This asshole android just told me my sister is trapped in this fucked-up flying saucer with us. Rune was supposed to have saved her. Claire and my father are supposed to be safe, back on Earth. I hold my breath trying to remember if Rune ever actually told me Claire was safe or not.
Jesus, did I just assume Rune would do the right thing and keep her safe?
Pious holds out his hand, waiting for me to take it. The air flickers around his armor. Head to toe, something blurry vibrates around the silvery metal encasing his body. I straighten and back as far away from him as I can, watching him carefully. One wrong move out of him and I’ll be trying out which weapons I like best in the metal arm I’m wearing.
I feel a bit smug thinking about being able to blast his head off, until I glance down at my forearms and realize I’m no longer wearing the protective gear. They’re dangling from my uncovered fingers along with the faceplate I should be wearing in case someone like Pious finds me. So I don’t get in the situation I find myself in right this second.
Well, that worked out brilliantly for me.
“Come, Kate.” He says my name with a strange twist of his alien mouth, like it tastes different than the other words he pronounces, sour maybe. “Take my hand. I’ll show you.”
My eyebrows raise. “I am not going to touch your hand, Pious.” I pull my lips down in the same fashion he had, immediately realizing he was sneering my name.
The lenses on his faceplate flare and he lifts his hand higher. “Female. You have nothing to fear from me.”
He’s got to be kidding me. “Are you crazy? Do those suits eat away at your brain cells or something?”
He’s still holding out his hand and all I want to do is smack it away.
“Just tell me where my sister is,” I demand.
He stares down at me and pulls his hand slowly back. “Your sibling is in the preservation lab, with the rest of the females.”
Great. That helps me a shit ton. I wonder if these helmets come with digital maps in them? “Take me there,” I say, tilting my chin up defiantly. “But don’t dare lay a hand on me.” I thrust my hands into the metal gloves quickly and hiss back a string of curses when the alloy burns through my skin. “I’m getting Claire,” I grunt, clenching my teeth. “Then I’m getting us out of here. Do you understand that?” I should just blow his head off right now and be done with him, find this preservation lab myself.
A low laughter rumbles from deep inside his chest. “You will never be able to find your way back to Earth from here, female.”
I glare at him and raise my now-armored fingers, pointing them at his head, holding them the way Jex showed me if I wanted to fire the weapons hidden inside. “I’m getting my sister and then you are going to get someone to fly us back down to Earth, unharmed.” I’m done playing games. It takes everything I’m made of not to blast his stupid metal head off.
There’s another flash of color across his faceplate and his metallic mouth curls up into a smile. My heart stutters and skips a beat in my chest. I know he can tell I’m able to use the weapons in this tin contraption, so why the hell is he smiling at me like he knows something I don’t? Oh hell, does he know something I don’t?
For a moment, I can’t decide what to say or do. I don’t trust any one of these Caelum assholes, especially Pious, who’s the biggest asshole of them all.
But he said Claire was here.
What if I don’t follow him, get all the way back down to Earth, and she’s still stuck on this thing? I’ll never be able to get back up into space by myself. She’ll be terrified up here all alone—no, screw that, she’s got to be frightened out of her mind right now.
“I understand your unwillingness to trust in my words, but surely you are aware that every Caelum aboard this vessel is searching for the female who is responsible for General Rune’s demise.” Quicker than I can think it possible, hard steel slams into me and grips my wrist. There’s no time to react, I don’t even see it coming—too busy thinking about my sister. Pious yanks hard and drags me forward. “It is unsafe for you to be without protection.”
I go limp and drop to the floor.
He keeps dragging me.
“Let go of me!” I scream, trying to kick out my legs. The tip of my steel-toe boot luckily makes contact with the back
of his knee, forcing him to bend forward, off balance.
As soon as I see him stumble, I push into his momentum and jump to my feet. He crashes faceplate first to the floor, letting go of his hold on me.
I manage to somehow stand upright, but my arms flail out and my legs don’t move, they just kind of lock into place. A small cry escapes from my lips as I try not to fall spread-eagle over him.
I steady myself, but Pious’s arm is already raised, his fingers aiming right for my head. My breath catches loudly. He’s got an arsenal at his fingertips, literally. Which weapon will he use? I hope it’s the one that turns me to glittery dust, because I don’t want to suffer. Boom, instant puff of stardust, and I’m no more.
My feet trip over themselves as I try and back away.
“Certainly, you cannot want your life extinguished now?” he growls.
My breaths are heavy and I’m seriously struggling not to vomit on him. “You know as well as I do; I did nothing to hurt Rune. And no,” I say, taking a deep breath, “I certainly do not want to die.”
His steel frame stands erect again, moving off the floor like some animated transformer cartoon.
“Move through that entryway, now.” One hand remains targeted on me while the other points toward the door he’s demanding me to walk through.
I’m sort of, kind of, paralyzed. My legs are still locked down.
“If you do not comply, I will bring you by force.” Another smile cranks the gears over his cheeks. “Whether I do so with you dead or alive is the question you should be asking yourself.”
I don’t want to go, and even though I don’t trust a word of what he says to me, I know I can trust in the fact that he could at any moment end my life. “W-will you take me to see my sister?”
He has the audacity to laugh at me, loud and raucous.
I flinch at the horrible sound.
“Your female population astounds me at every encounter I have with them. Does that helpless expression your gender demonstrates aid you in any way with your male population? It’s pathetic if it does.” He shoves me until my legs unlock and ushers me forward, walking through the doorway alongside me. Half of my mind spins, wondering how I could get one step behind him to fire my own weapon at him, and the other half is telling me to keep my mouth closed and do what he says so I could get to Claire.
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