by Carol Rivers
He pushed back his hair and nodded.
‘Is she here?’
‘No, but I’ve seen her.’ He beckoned her into the kitchen. ‘Sit down, I’ll put the kettle on.’
Hattie sat down at the kitchen table, careful not to let her sleeves touch the surface of the table cluttered with dishes. Her heart was racing as she watched Ben’s slow movements. What was he about to tell her?
‘Reube going up the Quarry tonight, is he?’ he asked as he put the tea in front of her.
Hattie nodded. ‘Yes, he thought you might be up there as well.’
‘No, I’m going to Poplar Road Hospital.’
Hattie froze. ‘Why?’
‘To visit Lil.’
Hattie put her hand to her mouth. ‘Oh my Gawd! What’s wrong? Is it the baby?’
‘What do you mean, baby?’
Hattie put her hands up to her face. She had let Lil’s secret out. She drew her hands slowly down. ‘I shouldn’t have said that.’
‘Are you telling me that Lil is expecting?’
Hattie watched the colour drain from his face. He sat there staring at her. He opened his mouth, then gave a little choke.
‘She might be. She was going to see the doctor.’
‘Christ, Hat.’ Ben leaned on the table as though he’d been winded. ‘That makes it all the worse.’
‘Makes what worse?’
‘I found her wandering about all dazed on Saturday morning. She said she’d fallen down the stairs and hurt her arm. I took her straight to the hospital.’
‘And you never told me?’
Ben looked at her keenly. ‘She asked me not to tell anyone and I, like you, Hat, kept quiet.’
Hattie felt her cheeks go red.
‘Come to think of it, the doctor said she needs time to recover physically and in other respects. Is he talking about the baby?’
Hattie shrugged. ‘I don’t know.’
‘Someone had been to the house and given the gaff a good going over.’
‘Oh my God, Ben!’ Hattie felt sick. ‘Was it burglars?’
‘If it was, they didn’t take nothing.’
‘Where was Charles Grey in all this?’
‘She don’t know. Just keeps saying he’ll be back.’
‘Poor Lil. Can I go to see her?’
‘She don’t want anyone to know what happened.’
‘But I’m her friend.’
‘I know.’ He shook his head slowly. ‘All she wants is to go back to Dewar Street. She believes he’ll come back for her. But now you’ve told me about the baby, I suppose I can understand why.’
Hattie began to get angry. ‘She’s waiting for a sod who don’t care nothing for her, or else he would never have let something like this happen to her.’
Ben nodded. ‘I can’t believe she fell down the stairs, Hat. I don’t know who done it, she won’t say, but what kind of bloke leaves a woman – his woman – to face what she had to?’
Hattie sat in silence. What was going on in Lil’s life? Much more than she had disclosed, that was obvious. ‘I want to know if she’s still . . . if she’s still got the baby.’
Ben frowned. ‘Does he know about her condition?’
‘Lil was going to see the doctor first.’
‘You know,’ said Ben slowly, ‘after what Noah Kelly told me, I think he’s in with some dubious types.’
‘What did Mr Kelly tell you?’
‘There’s the name of Charles Grey being bandied about down the Mission Hall. He was sympathetic to Mosley in his time, until Mosley fell from favour. This Charles Grey has fascist leanings, does a good bit of travelling abroad to drum up funds for the movement.’
Hattie gasped. ‘Do you suppose it could be the same Charles Grey?’
‘It would be a big coincidence if there was two.’
‘Did Mr Kelly tell Lil this?’
‘He was going to, but asked me to find out what I could first.’
‘And did you find out anything?’
‘Not until Saturday night when I returned to Dewar Street to get Lil’s things. And then I found these . . .’ He stood up and went out to the hall to fetch the bag. Opening it, he took out some pieces of paper.
‘What are they?’
‘Pages from a book.’
Hattie read the large black print on one of the torn pages. ‘This is that book the Blackshirts were always waving about.’
Ben nodded. ‘Mein Kampf.’
‘Why is it all torn up?’
‘Someone didn’t go along with his reading.’
‘Do you think it was the people who hurt Lily and broke the furniture?’ Hattie asked after a pause.
‘Looks like it.’
‘So she didn’t fall down the stairs?’
‘Not unless she was pushed.’
Hattie dropped the pieces on the table. She couldn’t believe that this was happening to Lil.
‘Ben, Lil don’t know any of this, else I’m sure she would have told me.’
He brought his hand down hard on the table, making her jump. ‘Do you know, Hat, I don’t give a toss for any man’s politics or his intention to practise them as this is a free country to choose as you want. But when a life is endangered because of them, a loving and innocent life, then I can find no sympathy in my heart for the coward who hides those beliefs behind a woman’s skirts.’
Hattie felt a cold shiver go down her spine as Ben’s soft grey eyes filled with icy cold anger.
Lily sat in the small waiting room next to Sister’s office. It was a week since she had been admitted to hospital. She wanted to go home. Many times she had asked the Sister if she could leave.
‘We’ll have to see what the doctor says,’ had been the stock reply.
Lily knew that they were keeping her under observation as they were concerned about the baby. But if she was at home, she would be happy. The girl in the next bed kept asking her about her life, and she didn’t want to be rude but it was getting awkward.
Where was Charles? Ben had been back several times but he hadn’t returned.
The Sister came out of her office. ‘The doctor says we need to keep you a few more days, Lily.’
‘But I’m well now.’
‘Lily, it’s nearly visiting time. Why don’t you go back to bed and wait for your young man?’
Lily knew they all thought Ben was the father of her child as he came every day to visit her. She allowed them to think it, as Charles hadn’t appeared. Sitting on her bed, Lily watched the visitors arrive. The girl in the next bed was soon surrounded. Ben was late today. Where was he? Had he found Charles? Would Charles come instead? Her heart began to beat fast with anticipation. She couldn’t throw herself into his arms because of the sling, but it didn’t matter. He would hold her gently and tell her he would never allow this to happen again.
Ben came through the doors and as usual, he wore his best suit and carried a small gift. He had brought her something every night. Lily looked for Charles, but he wasn’t there.
She flopped back against the pillow.
‘Hello, Funny Face.’ Ben pushed the bag of red apples into her good hand. ‘Get your mincers round these.’
‘Did you find Charles?’
Ben shook his head.
‘What about the letter I wrote to him?’
‘It’s still where you told me to leave it, on the kitchen table. Now, what did the doctor say about you coming out?’
‘I’ve got to stay a bit longer.’
‘Well, that’s sensible.’
Lily couldn’t contain her impatience. ‘You don’t understand. I’ve got to see Charles.’
But Ben just sat there. He didn’t bother to answer her any more when she talked about Charles. He didn’t even look as though he was interested.
Lily was relieved when he left. She wanted to be on her own to think of how she could get away from this place. If only Charles would come for her. In her letter she had written the details of where she was and begged
him to come and get her. ‘Charles,’ she whispered into her pillow, ‘where are you?’
Chapter Twenty-Eight
It came as a surprise when the doctor finally pronounced her well enough to leave and Lily was astonished as he drew the curtains back round her bed and handed Sister his notes.
‘We’ve given you a date to come back and have the plaster removed,’ he said, smiling. ‘And now we have an assurance that you can be looked after—’
‘You mean Charles has come?’ Lily blurted.
The doctor frowned. ‘Mr James.’
Lily sank back down. The doctor must have spoken to Ben, but it was Charles on whom she had pinned her hopes.
‘Now, don’t look so downhearted,’ the doctor said kindly. ‘If you would like to come to the office we can arrange the final details. Doctor Tapper, whose name you gave us to write to, has been very concerned about you.’
Lily sat in the office, listening to the doctor read out the information in his letter from Dr Tapper. The words of advice about her pregnancy, what she should eat and how she should rest, went in one ear and out of the other.
‘Mr James has assured us that he will take care of you,’ the doctor smiled knowingly. ‘I’m sure you and the baby will be in good hands whilst you and Mr James make arrangements for the future.’
Lily looked up. He thought Ben was the father of her baby! She gazed at the doctor, who seemed to be waiting for her to speak. But she knew if she told him the truth, she might not get out of hospital, leaving this place was all that mattered. The moment she set foot outside the building, somehow she would return to Dewar Street.
Ben brought her bag later that day and Lily managed to dress with the help of a nurse but she still felt very weak and clumsy. The Sister and nurses were very kind to her as she left but her heart was pounding as Ben wheeled her down the corridor in a wheelchair. What had he told them about the baby? Or had they just assumed it was Ben’s.
‘We’ll soon be home,’ he said as he took her bag and stowed it in the boot, then jumped in the cab beside her. ‘I’m going to take good care of you at my house for a while. After I’ve fed you up and got you on your feet then you can think about what you want to do.’
‘I know what I want,’ Lily said stubbornly. ‘I want to go to home to Dewar Street.’ It was all she could think of.
Ben sighed, rubbing his forehead with his hand. ‘Lil, there ain’t nothing there for you, trust me.’
‘Charles will come back, I know it.’
‘Look, Lil, there’s no way I’m leaving you alone in a big, rambling house to fend for yourself. I gave the doctor me word I’d look after you and that’s what I intend to do.’
Lily turned to him angrily. ‘So you do know about the baby?’
Ben felt his face go scarlet. ‘I know it’s none of me business.’
‘No, it isn’t.’
‘But you wanted to get out of that hospital, didn’t you? When I was asked if I could guarantee you rest and care, naturally, I said yes. They must have took it for granted that you and I were . . .’
‘Well, we ain’t.’
‘I know that.’
Lily heard Ben take a deep breath, trying to disguise his hurt. She knew that all he was doing was trying to look after her but there was nothing more important to her in the world than getting home to Charles.
‘Arguing is daft, Lil,’ he said in exasperation after a while. ‘Look, there’s things you’ve got to face up to. I know you’re not well enough to discuss them, but—’
‘Please, Ben,’ Lily interrupted, her eyes beseeching him to do as she asked. ‘I know you mean well and what you said to the doctor was for my benefit, but I’ve got to see Charles and tell him about the baby.’
‘I grant you he needs to be told,’ nodded Ben, ‘but I ain’t letting you stay in that place on your own, not after what happened.’
‘Then stay with me? There’s plenty of room. You could even ask Mrs Brewer to come in again during the day. She could help me dress and do the house and then you could go to work and wouldn’t be worried about me.’
‘You drive a hard bargain, Lil.’
‘Oh, please, Ben?’ Lily was desperate. She knew that if Charles wasn’t there, then Ben was right, she would be afraid those men might come back again. But her love for Charles was greater than her fear and if Mrs Brewer and Ben were with her, she would be protected.
‘I must need me head examining,’ Ben growled as he turned on the engine.
Lily closed her eyes and breathed a long sigh of relief as she realized she had finally got her way.
Ben couldn’t believe he was doing this as he’d made all the arrangements for Lil at home. He’d had a big tidy up and cleaned through. Yesterday he’d bought new sheets and a cover, a blue one, for the bed in the spare room. His private hope was that after a few weeks of recuperation at his house, she would have had time to think through her future.
Now he was driving her back to Dewar Street. The girl was adamant and there was nothing he could do to change her mind. But this time, he was going to make sure that he kept an eye on her. The next few days he’d take off work – he could afford it. There was all the broken stuff to ditch, though Mrs Brewer could come in and do the chores, but if his lordship returned, then he wanted to be there when he did. Ben’s face hardened as he came to the decision that he wasn’t going to leave Lil without some guarantee of her safety. He had those pages of Mein Kampf in his breast pocket and he’d show them to Charles Grey, tell him that Lil had to be in full possession of the details before Ben left her there. Then, if it was Lily’s choice to be with the man, so be it. If they had a kid between them and it was given a legitimate start in life, then Ben could swallow the man’s politics. As long as he loved Lil and would take care of her and the infant, that’s what mattered. Until then, he was going to sit on her shoulder like the proverbial parrot. If anyone even looked at her the wrong way, he’d floor them.
It was a grey morning, but the rain held off as Ben turned the cab into Poplar. The streets were busy with mid-week shoppers, and there was a nice bit of trade going on. He took a glance at Lily as they passed the Queen’s and turned the corner, where his heart missed a few beats. He couldn’t park outside number four as there was a van blocking the way.
‘The door’s open!’ gasped Lily, clutching his arm as she sat forward. ‘Someone’s in the house. It must be Charles!’
Ben stopped the car on the other side of the road. His first reflex was to clench his fists as an animal desire for revenge swept over him. Then seeing the look of joy on her face, he put his feelings aside.
‘Oh, I knew he’d be back.’
‘Wait there, whilst I see.’ He jumped out and walked across to the van. Furniture was piled high inside. ‘Robson’s Removals and Storage,’ was painted in bold black letters above the running boards.
Ben ascended the white stone steps. Two men pushed past him carrying a couch. Another man followed bearing a chair draped with a blue cover.
A man in a bowler hat, holding a sheaf of papers, came out of the house. ‘Good morning, young sir, and how can I ’elp?’ he said as he looked Ben up and down.
‘What’s happening here?’ Ben asked, trying to get a look inside.
‘Are you a buyer?’
‘Of what?’
‘The house, chum.’ The man slid a pencil from behind his ear and made a mark on the paper. ‘Now we’ll take the last bed,’ he shouted at two men who walked past them. ‘Make sure you got all the boxes from upstairs, too.’
‘I didn’t even know it was for sale,’ said Ben. ‘I’m looking for Mr Grey, the owner.’
‘You won’t find him here, not any more.’
They stood aside as a large iron bedstead was brought out. With a sinking feeling Ben recognized it as Lil’s.
‘That’s me bed!’ cried Lily as she stumbled towards them.
Ben took her arm. ‘You should have stayed in the cab, Lil.’
‘What are
they doing? That’s all me stuff!’
‘Well, it ain’t no longer, love,’ said the man, waving his papers. ‘Me name’s Robson and I bought everything in the house, lock, stock and barrel right down to the last ornament. Mind you, there’s a lot we had to chuck away as it was all broken. Might be able to make something of the rest though.’
‘Where’s Mr Grey?’ Lily asked in a faint voice.
‘Met him here yesterday, didn’t I? Seemed in a bit of a rush to get shot of this lot as he said he’d been burgled and was putting the gaff up for sale. When I offered him a price, he did the deal there and then and told me he didn’t want nothing left, as the staff that used to live here had all moved out.’
‘But I live here,’ Lily said, tears in her eyes. ‘I hadn’t moved out. I was only in hospital. I left him a letter to say where I was.’
‘Look, love, I don’t know about that, I’m only a bloke who’s trying to make a fair living. I didn’t find no clothes or anything personal in the house, otherwise you could have had it. Now, we’re almost finished, so I’ll bid you good day.’ Mr Robson walked back to the van.
‘Lil, come away.’ Ben tried to lead her back, but she rushed up the steps and into the house.
Ben went to go after her, but Mr Robson shook his head. ‘I should let her have a good look round, chum, to see for herself that there ain’t nothing in there now. Nasty affair it must have been, that burglary. Very upsetting. Was she one of the maids?’
Ben shook his head sadly. His heart almost broke in two as he waited, looking up at the empty shell of a house that Lily had loved so much.
Lily sat on the bed in the small bedroom of Ben’s house in Stepney. The room was about as large as one of the broom cupboards at Dewar Street. It was just able to fit a bed and small wardrobe. There was a jam jar on the window sill filled with fresh flowers.
She still couldn’t believe what she had seen with her own eyes at Dewar Street. Everything had been sold to a furniture dealer called Mr Robson. Walking round the empty rooms, she hadn’t recognized it. Hers and Charles’ beloved home, desolate and empty. She’d watched powerlessly as the last of the furniture had been piled on the van.