Rough Love

by Laura Morgan

  His voice then brought me back to reality. Tobin was groaning and bucking beneath me, his own release flowing out of him while my body still clenched around him. It was his turn to scream my name for everyone to hear, and didn’t that just ignite something far deeper inside of me, something carnal and euphoric. He was mine. There wasn’t a person in this huge house who wouldn’t have heard him come undone for me and for the first time, I wasn’t the least bit embarrassed about it.

  Chapter Eleven

  For weeks, Tobin and I lived in blissful ignorance of everything and anyone else around us, including my father. We stayed at the new clubhouse, which still felt strange to call Dahlia’s, but I was slowly getting used to it. Apart from the regular parties in which Sunny Skye and her friends kept the guys entertained, we had relative privacy and time for ourselves, which was exactly what I’d needed so that we could fight our demons alongside one another and come back whole. Together every day and night, we fell madly in love and I persisted in blocking out any and all doubts about us, my father’s plans for our future, or the awful past that still haunted my nightmares but I never let in during my waking moments.

  We celebrated Christmas there as a large, extended family, and I enjoyed every moment of it, not letting my fears or doubts about the club creep in even once. Dad seemed convinced of my sincerity and didn’t test me again, but I still kept my distance. He didn’t get to treat me like he had and then for things to go back to normal. Either he let go or not, but either way I had my life to lead and thought I was doing a pretty good job of it with Tobin by my side to help keep me strong.

  I also kept myself busy doing my online course and immersing myself in the world of web design, graphic design, and even a bit of blogging. I wrote reviews for the books I had read or the movies I had seen, all while remaining anonymous and posting my graphic art along with my reviews. The response was phenomenal. The worldwide audience seemed to like my work and before I knew it I had people asking me to buy the rights to my pictures or for me to build them a website. There was money in this. A career I could develop from the comfort of my own home, and I began to realise how much I wanted a job like that. Something I could take anywhere with me to work on day and night around Tobin and his schedule with the club.

  I hadn’t so much as looked at Dita’s laptop again, choosing instead to leave it hidden away in that desk drawer just like her secrets. Gone for a while but not forever. After all, even I knew the truth always had a habit of rearing its ugly head when you least expected it.

  ***

  “Happy Birthday dear, Nico. Happy Birthday to you,” I sang a few days after the new year had begun, greeting my oldest brother with a wide smile and a tight hug. I then made my way downstairs into the packed and busy clubhouse, greeting the birthday boy with genuine affection and happiness. He was the one person I felt I could count on. The constant source of support in the chaotic world I’d found myself in the past few months.

  “Cheers, Dahlia,” he replied, kissing my cheek and thanking me for his gift—a designer watch that Tobin and I had picked out together. The place was heaving, full to bursting with our friends and family, and every room in the huge house was taken by those who’d come to celebrate my brother’s birthday with us. Like with Tobin, Nico would move up into his given position within the club when Dad died or handed over the reigns, and had already been our father’s protégé for years. Everyone looked up to and respected him, knowing that one day he would be Tobin’s Vice President. In my view, he deserved it. He’d cared for me no end of times and I knew it wasn’t simply because he was Dad’s clear favourite, or my brother—it was because he was a good man.

  We had already been partying for hours but there was no sign of stopping so I downed another coffee and launched myself into Tobin’s arms. He caressed me with his strong hands, wrapping me up in his tight hold as he showered me with kisses and pressed himself into me.

  “Baby, will you go check on Calvin for me?” he then asked, leaning in to whisper quietly in my ear. Calvin was Chuck’s nephew, so Tobin’s cousin, and was one of the club’s more recently promoted members. He had gone up to one of the rooms hours ago and had no-doubt fallen asleep up there, but my father was getting ready to deliver his speech and Tobin seemed eager to have everyone together. He couldn’t leave the party himself but I could tell he wanted Calvin there. After having found one another when Tobin had tracked down his father, the two of them had become fast friends and I was pleased he’d come along for the weekend to celebrate Nico’s birthday with us. “Tell him to get his arse down here,” he added with a roll of his eyes.

  I nodded and slipped away with ease, kissing my man’s cheek on the way. I don’t think anyone even noticed me make an exit. Despite my stronghold atop the female entities of our group, it seemed I was still the quiet, unassuming woman I had always been. Not that I cared or wanted the increased attention, but it surprised me that I still wasn’t fitting in properly yet. I had to make sure I changed that as soon as possible.

  “Calvin?” I whispered as I ducked inside his room after my quiet knocks went unanswered. His room smelled of smoke and beer, despite the window being open, so I made my way around to his bedside to check that he hadn’t drank too much and was perhaps lying in a pile of his own vomit. He was fast asleep, no puke in sight, and while I breathed a small sigh of relief I stroked my hand over his forehead, brushing back his long hair while whispering his name a few more times in an attempt to rouse him.

  In a sudden movement uncharacteristic of him, Calvin jumped awake and grabbed me by the throat. In comparison to his huge body, my tiny frame was like a ragdoll and he quickly had me on my back on his bed, pinned to the covers with him over me while he shook himself awake.

  “What the fuck? Dahlia?” he groaned, immediately letting me go when he realised that it was me and I groaned as I rubbed at my sore neck where he had held me down so harshly. “What are you doing in here?”

  “You’re missing the party so Tobin sent me to get you,” I replied, climbing up and turning on the bedside light to brighten the place up in the hopes of waking him a bit more. “My dad’s doing a speech soon. Are you coming down?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute. Get outta here,” he said, eyeing me as though he were scared of me or something and I reached my hand out to try and calm him, but he flinched. I was stunned, had he actually just flinched as though I might hurt him? I knew that he was naked beneath those sheets and possibly felt uneasy being alone there with me but I wasn’t about to try anything.

  I pulled back and walked around the bed towards the door, and on my way I caught sight of the clothes he had been wearing earlier that day. They were gathered so incredibly neatly in a pile on his dresser, perfectly folded and stacked in a way that made me take immediate notice. Even his belt and watch were atop the almost pristinely stacked neat pile and I suddenly turned cold from head to toe.

  Good, God. No…

  How I didn’t fall in a heap before that horrible mound of clothing was beyond me. In that moment, I knew that pile of clothes. That neat and ever so precise folding method. I didn’t know them through my own eyes or memories, but I knew them through Dita’s words and the realisation hit me like a punch to the throat. I can’t remember if Calvin said anything else, but I know I didn’t. My mouth was so damned dry that I could barely even swallow, let alone confront him or say anything else.

  Out in the hall, my breath soon began to feel shallower and harder to catch. No matter how hard I tried to gather it, that precious oxygen just didn’t find its way into my lungs and pretty soon I was bent double, hands on my knees and my head down as I tried to suck in as much of the smoky air as I could.

  “What happened, Dahlia?” came a voice from halfway up the stairs and I leapt back at the sound, not having realised that I wasn’t alone. Nico stood watching me, a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other, and his face was like thunder. He was furious, seemingly with me, and I just shook my head. I still
couldn’t speak and I tried desperately to regain my composure enough to tell him a lie and sneak away to my own room where I knew my impending breakdown could happen in private. “Don’t you dare lie to me,” he added, his voice booming as he stepped closer, and I suddenly had an urge to run.

  Nico caught my unease. Without another word, he slid his cigarette down into the neck of his beer bottle and placed it on the floor, climbing higher with his hands up as though he meant me no harm, and yet his scowl was still firmly in place. The last time I had seen that look was the night he’d woken me to say he was there to watch over and keep me safe while his best buddy had his wicked way with me. He had said that night how he was there to protect me, but I could see the rage behind that look even then. It was the same look again, but this time there was no mask of protector and brother, just a powerful adversary who seemed to know exactly what I was freaking out about without me having to utter a word, which clearly meant that he knew the truth about Dita and X, who I was now positive must have been Calvin.

  “Nothing, let’s go back to the party,” I eventually managed to reply, although rather than go towards him, I stepped away and then headed to mine and Tobin’s room. Nico was hot on my heels and when I reached my door and flung myself inside, he refused to respect my privacy. In fact, I think he might’ve kicked the door in if I had managed to get it closed behind me. He burst in straight after me as though he had run or leapt the last couple of steps and length of the hallway right behind me. Before I could even ask him what was going on, my biggest brother pinned me down on the bed and got right in my face.

  “Dahlia, tell me what happened,” he insisted, almost growling. Although I couldn’t see his eyes in the pitch-black darkness, I felt them burning into me from above and cringed. He had to know what Calvin had done to Dita, surely? I couldn’t answer. I was terrified of the repercussions I might be forced to face if I spoke the truth now, but Nico didn’t stop. “I need you to tell me exactly what Calvin just said to you, or what he did. I need you to tell me right now or so help me God I’m gonna go in there and beat the living shit out of him.”

  That wasn’t what I’d expected to hear.

  “What? I don’t understand?” I breathed. His response had shocked me and I couldn’t tell whether he was angry with Calvin or me. “He didn’t do anything. I just had a moment that’s all,” I tried, doing my best to stay calm and try to convince Nico that nothing untoward was going on, but he was having none of it.

  “Did he try and touch you? Has he ever touched you? I need you to tell me the truth, Dahlia.” He let go of the tight grip on me ever so slightly but didn’t move or let me sit up. My brother just kept me at his mercy, waiting for my walls to come crashing down, and a sob finally caught in my throat and gave me away. He knew that I was hiding something. There was no going back and so I knew I had to be honest.

  “No, he has never touched me. But I know what he did to Dita,” I replied, making Nico groan and pull away from me at long last. He then flicked on the light and began pacing the room, running his hands through his dark hair with a pained look on his face. It was as though he felt guilty, and I had to wonder what part he too might’ve played in our sister’s punishment.

  “You were never supposed to find out, even Tobin doesn’t know,” he replied after a few tense minutes and that one piece of truth from my big brother made me feel so elated I couldn’t even begin to describe it. Tobin hadn’t known what my sister had been through. He hadn’t been in on her abuse and she had clearly done a good job at hiding it from him. That realisation gave me strength. “I told Calvin he wasn’t allowed anywhere near you and I’m glad to hear that he has followed his orders this time.”

  “This time? So, did Dad tell him to rape her or not?” I blurted out, stopping Nico mid-pace and he looked at me in horror.

  “No, he would never do that!” he cried, his loyalty to our father etched clearly on his face despite his pain having risen. “Calvin was meant to scare her, rough Dita up a bit, but nothing too bad. She was a fucking livewire, Dahlia. She could be a crazy bitch at times but you never saw her when she went mad like that. The only thing that could calm her down when she was really bad was a fucking sedative and she refused to take them that night. She told Dad that she was leaving and she would take him and the club down when she did.”

  Nico stepped closer to me, hesitating before resting a hand on my shoulder. “He needed to take things further to scare her into doing as she was told. She was never like you, Dahlia. She revelled in his disapproval, I’m sure of it. Dita enjoyed winding him up, causing trouble for him and then watching him squirm. But that night, Dad just snapped. Calvin roughed her up and then he lost himself in the moment. He took things way too far and since then I’ve kept an eye on him to make sure that it didn’t happen again. When he snaps he doesn’t even know who he is, let alone what he’s doing.”

  I wondered how my brother could possibly know all of those things. How he could carry on as if nothing had happened when he knew what Calvin had done to Dita. Even one time was too many, and yet I had the sneaking suspicion Nico didn’t quite know all of the facts.

  “Nico,” I whispered, shaking my head in shock. “He didn’t just do it once. He did it over and over again. Dita was sure Dad was sending him to her room when she’d been bad or when Tobin started losing interest. He raped her so many times that she stopped fighting him. All the while, she was dying inside because she thought that you were all behind it. She begged Dad to stop him, but he said it would only stop when she had learned to behave. He knew all about what Calvin was doing.”

  Nico fell to the ground, his legs seemingly giving way beneath him and his eyes went wide with shock. We sat in silence for a few seconds, him taking in what I’d just said, and vice versa.

  “How do you know all of this?” he asked, grabbing his stomach as though it was suddenly hurting him and I told a white lie, not wanting to give up the laptop just yet.

  “She told me. Dita never said who it was, but near the end she told me about all of the times she’d endured him coming into her room, beating and violating her while I was asleep a few doors away. How could no one know?” I replied, and paled at the thought that perhaps none of this had been planned how Dita had thought. Calvin might have been doing all of it alone for his own kicks.

  “I’m gonna fuck him over for this, make no mistake about that. He told me over and over how he never touched her again, lying right to my face and now I hear this. From you?! I think I’m gonna be sick,” Nico said, running into the en-suite while I sat on the bed and rocked back and forth, my pent-up emotion suddenly releasing.

  I was in complete and utter turmoil. I didn’t know who to believe or what to think. There was always a part of me that knew Dita’s diaries would only tell her side of the story, of course, but I had taken her word for it that Dad must have been sending Calvin to her all those times to teach her a lesson.

  Thinking about it after Nico’s version of events, I came to realise she had to have been wrong. She’d automatically assumed that Dad had instigated those cruel punishments simply because she hated him so very much and would’ve always thought that of him. Her hatred would have overridden any logical response to those visits, and perhaps Calvin had played on those feelings she’d always had towards our father. It wasn’t like she hid them, so maybe he was the one who told her Dad had sent him. I knew that I might never know for sure, but I had to trust in Nico’s story too. Part of me desperately wanted to believe that Dad and Tobin were still the innocent parties in Dita’s abusive history.

  There was something else I needed though, and I hoped that between Nico and me we could figure out a way to keep our realisations a secret. I needed more time. To do it properly.

  “I want to do this carefully,” I said as he emerged from the bathroom, swaying until he plonked himself down on the chair beside my dresser. “If what you’re saying is true, Calvin is the only one who needs to be punished, and so we need to go about thi
s the right way. I want him to suffer, but I want to shame and humiliate him first. I want to get him kicked out of the club, his family, and maybe even this entire country for what he’s done to our sister. We do this right, Nico. We do it the clever way.”

  “Fuck, where did this girl come from?” Nico replied, seeming surprised at my sly plan in comparison to his violent desire to teach our enemy a lesson, but I could tell he was instantly on board.

  “Don’t worry, you’re not the only one who has underestimated me all these years, Nico. But trust me, we’re going to take him down, and when we do, he will wish for death. Are you in?”

  “Yeah, I’m in,” he replied, leaning forward to offer me his hand and I shook it with a devious smile. All thoughts of shock and worry were gone. Instead, I felt strong and full of resolve. I would avenge my sister. I would do one thing right by her in my entire life and when it was all done and dusted I decided I’d simply carry on with my life, because I was also going to make sure that no one knew that it was me who had done it, even if it meant blackmailing Nico in order to ensure his silence in the end.

  We had each underestimated Calvin. I’d not gotten to know him all that well over the years, but he’d seemed like such a nice guy. Always the joker of the group. He had come across a gentle soul as well though, calm and quiet natured much like me, but we had always gotten along. I remember how glad I had been when my father had allowed him a proper place in the club after his couple of years being a prospect.

  Not any more. From that moment on, he was my enemy, someone to be defeated and left to rot in the wake of our battle.

  God, how naïve I was, thinking I was capable of such things…

  Chapter Twelve

  Once we’d finally emerged, Nico and I put on the bravest faces we could and went down to re-join the party. I wasn’t sure what our next step would be, but I knew we could do this. That we could see it through and come out on top. I also knew that when Calvin was defeated we would know, even if no one else did, that we were a force to be reckoned with. A Vice President and a President’s old lady who could reign over their father’s empire with unending strength once he was gone.