by Matt Rogers
Chapter 5: Midgling Stew
The Siege (Castle Nirvana)
They met in the great ballroom to decide on the best way forward.
“What did you learn, Hawkeye?”
“The command tent is at the rear in this grove of trees, General” he responded, pointing to a spot on the map.
Everyone watched as the plan came to life. General Shield would lead the diversion himself and Hawkeye would provide cover with his archers atop the castle walls.
“Stu?”
“Yes Wort?”
“Are you afraid?”
“I think I’m scared out of my mind!”
“Me too!”
The Midglings were from the land down under; the caves below where their race fled when it was discovered they had absolutely no chance to survive in the land above. Most of their kind still resided below but a few, the adventurous ones, sometimes struck out on their own and see what the rest of the creatures were up to. Most were eaten, of course, because the rest of the inhabitants were up to the same thing they’d always been up to; warring and killing which left them bruised and hungry. Stu and Wort survived because they caught Mother Nature’s eye. They’d arisen from underground on a gloriously beautiful day and were wandering the forest in rapt amazement when they came across something unexpected.
“What’s that?”
“I think it’s a house!”
“What’s a house?”
“It’s a structure some creatures sleep in.”
They were curious little beings and decided to go for a closer look.
“What’s it made of?”
“Looks like a bunch of twigs and vines and stuff.”
The ramshackle shack was, indeed, made of the various materials for its inhabitant was not exactly the crafty kind.
“Do you think anyone lives there?”
“I don’t know? Let’s find out.”
So the two walked up to the door, knocked, waited and were pleasantly surprised when someone answered.
“Hello, we’re...”
Then grabbed by their hair, lifted off the ground and tossed in a cage. Both sat in somewhat shocked amazement, unsure of the proper house-greeting manners from those who resided aboveground and a little worried they’d done something wrong.
“Um, excuse me?” Stu asked.
“Ma’am?” Wort inquired.
The resident of the run-down structure paid them little notice for she was busy placing sticks and logs onto a fire which was heating an enormous cauldron. As she was doing so both Midglings began looking around to get a feel for the place. There were bottles of liquids on shelves lining every wall, books in various stages of overuse and a broom sitting in the corner which had obviously not been used for quite some time.
“Do you think she’s making an afternoon meal for us?” Wort asked.
“Ooh! That would be nice!”
They watched as the woman with a large nose, unsightly mole and oddly triangular hat kept adding fuel to the flame.
“Um… Stu?”
“Yes, Wort?”
“She hasn’t added anything to the bowl.”
“You know, I was thinking the same thing.”
The two waited a little longer until it became apparent she needed some advice.
“Ma’am, you need to put something in the water” Stu said by way of help.
She finally turned to face them and the two, being who they were, gave their widest of smiles and began introductions.
“Hello, Ma’am, my name is Stu and this is my friend, Wort. Sorry about the way we banged on your door but where we reside it’s done to get the attention of the person inside.”
Stu couldn’t think of anything else to say so turned to his friend.
“Uh-huh, we really are sorry if we broke protocol or something but it’s our first time up top and we don’t actually know the ways of top-world peoples” Wort added to strengthen their pleas of innocence.
She didn’t say anything so they continued on.
“Um, not to tell you how to do your job or anything but it’s probably about the right time to add something to that giant bowl you’ve got there” Stu said.
When she remained quiet Wort piped in.
“Yep, once again, I’m not about to critique your culinary skills but you might want to add some ingredients. You see, boiling water doesn’t really get much hotter and as the steam escapes you’ll need to add more water which will lower the temperature and cause boil fluctuation” he said while punctuating with a nod.
She began to move towards them and they squared their shoulders, sucked in their bellies and prepared to greet her with Midgling courtesy. She stood in front of the four-foot high cage, unlatched the lock, opened the door slightly and grabbed Wort by his topknot.
“Ouch!”
She pulled him out, re-shut the cage door and re-clamped the lock leaving Stu even more bewildered because where he came from hair-grabbing was considered quite rude.
“Ma’am?” he asked in a shaky voice for he was getting a particularly unpleasant feeling in his gut.
She still held Wort by his hair as she turned her head slightly to look over her shoulder at the Midgling.
“Gulp!”
The leer she gave him, the crooked smile and mischievous gaze made Stu’s unpleasant feeling turn higher. He thought she was about to speak when a knock at the front door interrupted things.
“Esmeralda? Are you home? It’s me, Gaia Nature” a voice said.
The woman stopped, stood still for a second, turned around, put Wort back in the cage and replaced the lock. When she was done she looked both Midglings directly in their eyes and spoke for the first time.
“Silence.”
Both Stu and Wort came to the same conclusion at the exact same time; they did not like the woman’s hospitality. As the door opened and the other lady entered they opened their mouths for permission to leave the cage. What came next perplexed them completely for when they shouted nothing was heard.
“Hello, Esmeralda, I’ve brought you a basket of fruits and vegetables. I know how difficult it is to find food in this forest” the woman with blonde hair said.
The Midglings looked at each other in confusion because both were trying to be heard but they’d lost their voices.
The woman named Esmeralda smiled at the beautiful visitor and indicated with a bobbing head the gratitude she felt.
“No need to thank me. But please take my advice and move your cottage closer to the castle. We have plenty of stores and you wouldn’t need to wander the woods to find your daily bread.”
The black haired woman said nothing but her frown revealed she didn’t like the idea.
By then the Midglings were becoming anxious. They didn’t know what rule of visitation they’d broken for they truly were social beings. However, they felt getting locked in a cage and forced to watch someone with little to no cooking ability perform a chore in such an illogical manner was not the appropriate response. Also, they were really worried about their lack of communication skills.
“Okay, I understand this is your home and I won’t keep badgering but I’d like you to think about it, all right?” the woman named Gaia asked.
The other one, the ugly one, the one who knew not about boiling water again nodded her head to indicate she would consider it.
About that time Stu became very concerned because it appeared the other lady, the pretty one, was about to leave and she hadn’t even glanced in their direction. He looked around the cage to see if he could find anything to get her attention since his voice was stifled but saw nothing. He was starting to become desperate and noticed Wort becoming so also. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want to watch boiling water and didn’t like the way the lady in black chose to carry them so he did the only thing he could think of at the time.
“Ouch!” he said, although no audible sound emerged, when he jumped and hit his head on the roof of the cage.
Wort looked a
t him quizzically and Stu again jumped as high as he could. Realization dawned and Wort did the same but for some reason the nice woman, the one who brought a basket with food, took no notice of them.
“Okay, well if you need anything you know where to find me” the one called Gaia said with a smile and Stu’s anxiety ratcheted higher.
For some reason she couldn’t see them. For some reason she couldn’t hear them. He knew something was off but didn’t know what it was. He was about to resign himself to watching inappropriate meal-making when he came upon one final idea he felt might work. He looked to his friend with an apology in his eye, spun Wort around and pushed him with all his might into the side of the cage.
“Ouch!” Wort said.
Again nothing was heard but the act did produce one tiny effect which saved them; the cage rattled.
“Oh! What was that?” Gaia said.
“Those are mine” Esmeralda replied with a voice of crackling quality.
Gaia moved around the black-hatted woman and finally noticed the Midglings who, at that time, were in a wrestling contest because Wort had not figured out why Stu threw him against the side of the cage.
“Are those Midglings?”
“Those are mine.”
Wort and Stu broke their holds because they realized the good one, the pretty blonde, had finally noticed their presence.
It was then when Gaia noticed something else.
“Is that a cauldron of boiling water?”
The one named Esmeralda suddenly took on a new demeanor. She became much more defensive and appeared to grow a little larger, emanate a little more power, and both Midglings felt something about her was not quite right.
“You may leave now, Gaia” she crackled.
“Were you planning on eating these Midglings, Esmeralda?”
Now, while it was true neither Wort nor Stu could make a sound it was not true they couldn’t hear, so when the nice lady in blue asked the question to the sullen lady in black both Midglings reacted as their species were designed to do in times of crisis; they fainted on the spot.
Luckily, Gaia took a liking and bargained for their lives.
“If you let me have them I will grow your shack out of Ginger branches.”
They had been hashing out a proper trading value for the two unconscious beings when Gaia noticed Esmeralda’s eyes open a bit more at the mention of Ginger branches.
“Will you add Sugar Plum branches also?”
“I can” Gaia responded.
“And Lemon Drop branches?”
“Yes. My, you seem to have developed a sweet tooth, Esmeralda.”
Esmeralda merely smiled. Gaia was right. She had developed a taste for something new. Only not, necessarily, of the sugar variety. She had one more request, though, for she was not of the welding and manufacturing folk.
“And I need an oven.”
“An oven?”
“Yes, I believe I shall start baking my sweets instead.”
The deal was struck and the Midglings went to live in Mother Nature’s castle while Esmeralda perfected the art of candy-making and used her brand-new oven to bake somewhat different tasty treats.
Wort and Stu remained in the castle because it was the most wondrous place they’d ever seen. Every type of creature could be found, even those of Ogre, Orc and Troll for though they were normally born with evil in their hearts sometimes mutations occurred and Mother Nature happily took them in. The two rapidly became normal fixtures and went about performing their chores admirably if not exactly efficiently. It wasn’t their fault because three feet of height brought about difficulties when chandelier-cleaning appeared on the ‘To Do’ list. Even so, they found themselves a home and were happy as two Midglings could get. That is, until they were tasked with saving the castle under siege by the forces of Prince Blight.
“Hello, you two.”
“Hello, Mother Nature.”
She called them to her chambers and they responded with hope in their hearts the plan had somehow changed
“Are you two ready?”
With their hopes dashed they began a new tactic.
“Um, Ma’am, we’re really proud you’ve shown so much trust in us but…”
“But what, Stu?”
“But we’re pretty sure we’re going to die, Ma’am.”
She glanced at Wort.
“And do you feel the same way, little one?”
“No, Ma’am, I’m not pretty sure we’re going to die; I’m positive we’re going to die.”
She took a second and thought on what they proclaimed.
“All right, I’m going to allow you the chance to decline but first I want you to hear me out, okay?”
They both nodded they would.
“As of right now we’re at a standstill but it will not last forever. Every soldier we have are on the castle walls because we do not have the manpower to relieve them. Until now I have been providing an aid to keep them awake but at some point their bodies will revolt and they will fall asleep. When that happens were are done for. The forces of Blight will enter the castle and all will be lost. The only chance we have is the help of Father Time. I would willingly go myself but I am needed here to defend the castle and so is every single soldier behind these walls. I am sending you two because I believe you can succeed. The forces opposing us will not be looking for ones such as you. I thought about sending an escort but decided against it for two reasons. First, if I do send one we will further deplete our ranks and part of the walls will go undefended. Second, if you run into the enemy they will probably pay you no attention if you’re alone but if you are with an escort they will most definitely challenge and, again, all will be lost. I will not force you to do the service but I do believe it is our only chance. As always, the choice is up to you.”
Both Midglings, of course, acceded to her desires. They left her chambers for the time was fast approaching, the sun setting and the forces of Nature mounting their steeds.
“You know, she really is good with the guilt trips.”
“Yep.”
So the two entered the courtyard dressed in brown and green, carrying their backpacks and standing around doing nothing for their part of the adventure wouldn’t really begin until the others’ had ended.