by Matt Rogers
Chapter 37: Marriage Troubles
The Journey (Lazy River)
The Lazy River was exactly as its name implied; a slow moving snake-like body of liquid which meandered through the countryside without ever picking up speed. The ship the mercenaries commandeered was a small sailboat equipped with the necessities to perform its function. It had a wheel for steering, oars for rowing, sails to catch the wind and space below deck where supplies could be stored and sleep obtained. The three mercenaries were up top, the Midglings down below.
“Oh my God!”
“Please, please don’t talk so loud.”
“I think I’m going to throw up.”
“Urp! Oh Lord, me too.”
The Midglings had regained consciousness and wished they hadn’t.
“Stu?”
“Yes, Wort?”
“Is the world spinning or is it just me?”
“It’s not you. The world is definitely spinning and… Urp! Oh God! Not again.”
Midgling curiosity had paved the way for Midgling consumption of spiritual intoxication which brought about Midgling mortification as the world shifted side to side in order to bring about Midgling regurgitation.
“Oh, Dear Lord! Is it ever going to end!”
“I’m sure it’ll end. There’s nothing left in my stomach to… oh God! Get out of the way!”
The two little creatures were learning the difference between their brew and the kind Humans produced. They vowed over and over never to commit the fallacy again.
“Oh, Dear God. I promise I’ll never take another sip of that stuff if you’ll just… Urp! Oh, you have got to be kidding!”
Both were in the hold, attempting to retain anything they swallowed the day before. It appeared to be a losing experience.
“Please, Lord, I swear on my mother’s soul if you stop this I promise I’ll never… Urp! Oh crap!”
As two down below prayed for relief, three on top were discussing different matters.
“So, what do you think?”
Sergeant Savage asked both for their thoughts. He always did so and would forever do so for the sole reason he trusted them with his life. They, in turn, trusted him with theirs. It seemed rather appropriate, therefore, to get their opinions on his survival plan.
“I think we’re going to get ourselves killed.”
“Yep, I was thinking the same thing.”
His vision for the future involved ensuring the safety of the two Midglings until they reached Father Time’s realm. It held a slight problem in its design.
“Okay, I’m assuming you two are seeing a problem with Mother Mayeye.”
“Yep.”
“Uh-huh.”
Mother Mayeye was not unknown to the three. They had crossed her path before. It had been both pleasant and slightly death defying.
“Look, I can’t possibly think she still holds her previous intention.”
He waited for their response. He thought his reasoning sound. They thought otherwise.
“She is going to skin you alive.”
“Dude, you left her at the altar.”
“You know what, Brutus? You should probably keep quiet.”
It happened many years before. The three had taken up with Mother Mayeye’s forces to oppose vandals from the Land of Lawlessness who raided. The vandals weren’t exactly dangerous, they generally pillaged a few homes for small artifacts but the acts continued. Mayeye’s forces were unable to put a stop to the vagrants so she held open auditions to find some who could. Savage offered his services. It was a major mistake.
“We’ve got the job?”
Brutus asked because Deadaim was in the midst of taking money from those who bet against him.
“So, the bet is you can shoot an arrow from a hundred meters away and snuff the flame without touching the candle itself?”
“Yep.”
“You’re on!”
They were in Mayeye’s fortress, actually the city surrounding the castle but since the place had grown so large and the population so vast the perimeter was refortified with a wall around the complexes outside the palace proper. The castle had become a circle within a circle and was seen as impregnable to attack.
“When do we start?”
“As soon as we gather enough men to enter Lawlessness, round up the culprits and persuade them to cease their activities.”
Savage and Brutus were talking as Deadaim prepared. The preparation was somewhat discouraging to those who thought he could not perform the deed because it held no rituals at all.
“You ready?”
“Yep.”
“You’re not going to warm up?”
“Nope.”
The trick was actually rather difficult to accomplish even if its success was easy to vocalize. Light the wick, stand a hundred meters away, fire an arrow and extinguish the flame without disturbing the candle. The candle teetered on a pedestal which was anything but secure.
“Ready!”
Pull the string.
“Aim!”
Sight the object.
“Fire!”
Collect the prize.
“Son of a…?”
“How? How is that remotely possible?”
The deed was usually a failure because the contestants performed the task as most people would; hit the wick. The problem was the candle. The base was such that even the most experienced archer would fail because, while they hit the flame without touching the candle, the passage of the projectile was such its air would cause the wax sculpture to fall. The way around it was to place the arrow-head near the flame with enough velocity to cause an air vortex. The initial passage would snuff the flame and with enough force the fuel needed to reignite the wick could not penetrate the void left behind. Both Savage and Brutus had seen Deadaim do it so many times they were immune to other’s surprise.
“There is no way that is possible!”’
“Whatever. Pay up.”
They were standing around one of the many courtyards dotting the perimeter and were rather enjoying their sudden prosperity. Deadaim made his way over.
“How much did we earn?”
Brutus, in charge of their wages, was actually a little unprepared for the question.
“Huh?”
“The trick. How much did we make?”
Registration dawned on the barbarian’s brain and he began counting the amount of gold perfection in archery could obtain from a fraction of a second. Savage, for his part was thinking about how many people they would need in order to satisfy Mother Mayeye's desires for non-vandalism so did not see the man approach.
“I want my money back!”
The sentence got his attention.
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. I want my money back!”
The ritual was ever the same even if the participants changed.
“No refunds.”
Sometimes, though, people were pig-headed in their beliefs.
“The game was rigged! Give my money back or I’ll take your head!”
So the game changed.
His eyes took on a new look, his face became stone. His friends noticed.
“Look buddy, you might what to reconsider…”
The man was beyond persuasion. He was a bully and did as he wished. He wasn’t a complete fool, though; the barbarian attempting to placate things was enormous but the one he challenged was not.
“Look, I’ve got no gripe with you. My problem is with that con artist who stole my money!” he said, pointing at Savage.
The fact the deed was done by Deadaim was not lost on everyone in attendance. The man had picked the most unintimidating of the three to exact his vengeance.
“Give me my money or face the consequences!”
Brutus saw the look in Savage’s eye. He thought to intervene on life’s behalf.
“Dude, seriously, you do not want to do this.”
“This is not between us! This is between me and that pipsqueak who
stole my money!”
Brutus thought of saying something. Deadaim thought of saying something. Savage did say something.
“Then take it from me.”
The two who knew him most knew him best. The man who resembled the mildest was anything but. Both knew the truth. They were the best in their realms. If it came to a fight Brutus would destroy all competitors. When it came to archery Deadaim was a master of deadly precision. They followed Savage because he was something different. The event unfolded before a watching audience. What they witnessed was the reason two who had no equals followed another.
“Please, I am sorry.”
The swordplay had been anything but. The first slash was the man’s last as Savage systematically carved him up while he was still armed. It was effortless. There wasn’t a single space on the other’s body which did not show signs of sharpened steel. It was also horrifying to behold. Blood flowed everywhere. Flesh hung as though the man were molting. The spectators had long ago quit cheering for the one they thought the non-aggressor. None had ever seen such a display before, save two, two who knew the truth; Savage tolerated those who perceived themselves more powerful with contempt. Until they challenged. Then he tolerated them naught.
“Sergeant?”
“What?”
“Please stop.”
Deadaim asked because he could not do otherwise. Neither could. They knew him for what he was.
“Why?”
The question was valid so Deadaim answered in kind.
“Because he can offer no resistance. To kill him is to murder him.”
Those who remained would forever know the truth. No one could match his blade. He was beyond competition, beyond comprehension, an entity of his own. He had toyed with the man.
The struggle was internal. The man was a bully. A breed which was deplorable. Humans without reconciliation. He hated them. Held Mother Nature accountable for their very existence. Why should those born with physical gifts but lacking in social conscious live to torture others for their own sadistic pleasures?
“He will go on to harm others.”
“Maybe not. Maybe he will learn.”
Savage decided to negate the possibility.
“Mercy!”
He took the man’s head with a stroke.
“Then she is too slow. Nature should have taught him already.”
He found her wanting. She allowed those with abilities, unearned, to dominate others. He had a problem with her leniency. Unfortunately for some, his problem could readily be solved with a blade.
“You do realize she is not the problem?” Deadaim inquired.
“No? What is her purpose, then? Look around! Everything is for those with power. The weak, the poor, suffer so those who have all can attain more! Is she blind?”
Deadaim did no think so. He was a disciple. Not a practicing one but a disciple nonetheless.
“No, she is not blind! But she is not the reason either. Dang-it man, she is good! Quit placing the evil of others on her shoulders!”
Savage was ready for his friend’s accusation.
“Then she is worthless! What good does she do if those who seek power walk around without obstruction?”
The answer was always the same. And always in doubt.
“Because this is not the end! We meet the Maker and must answer!”
His answer, though, was never in doubt.
“Then I will meet the Maker at sword-point. He or she has a lot to answer for.”
The three went on to find the vandals, convinced them their ways were wrong and would’ve received their reward if not for one small problem they, unfortunately, overlooked.
“Halt!”
They halted.
“You are under arrest!”
They looked at the soldier with curiosity.
“You have been banned from Lawlessness!”
And realized their dilemma. They’d somewhat forgotten their previous banishment. It hadn’t completely slipped their minds but they felt since they were acting on behalf of Mother Mayeye then they were exempt from Lawlessness’ verdict. Apparently they were wrong.
“Seriously?”
“Yes!”
They looked around. There was no one else in sight.
“Who’s going to arrest us?”
The soldier of Lawlessness also looked around. He was obviously a little uncomfortable considering the circumstances but regained his composure and spoke the truth.
“Look, I’m just the messenger so don’t get foolish. Queen Ann Arch’s army is coming from the north. She has a treaty with Mother Mayeye whose forces are approaching from the south. I’m sorry, really I am, because I don’t believe you warrant such a response but I’ve been tasked with a job and I intend to do it.”
Savage’s mind was already considering the possibilities. They did not appear promising.
“Are you telling me I was employed by one Monarch to solve a problem coming from another rulers’ realm and, after I accomplish the task, I’m to be arrested for violating a law in the land responsible for the violation ?”
“Um… Yes.”
The prospects were not looking good. While the three were without question the most dangerous men in the realms they were not so great they could defeat an army let alone two. They saw the writing on the wall, dismissed the hired hands they’d brought along, allowed themselves to be arrested and found themselves in a courtroom defended by the most incompetent lawyer on the planet. He was appointed by the judge, a rather boorish man with little in the way of humility.
“All rise! The court is in session.”
The room was packed. The infamy of the trio brought out the curious.
“How do the defendants plea?”
Their lawyer, Thomas Threadbare the Third, was fresh out of counselor school and eager to make a name for himself.
“We plead insanity, Your Honor.”
The audience sat stunned. The defendants did not.
“What?”
All three looked upon Threadbare with questioning glances. He indicated they should hold their tongues, they sat back down and he continued.
“Your Honor, my clients cannot be held in violation of trespassing on Lawlessness’ lands because they were lost.”
“Lost?”
“Yes, Your Honor, lost. They were lost of thought which led them to be lost on land which placed them in the position of being lost of freedom. They are therefore, by definition, insane.”
The courtroom became abuzz with confusion. They were not the only ones.
“Are you saying because they didn’t know where they were, they’re to be considered insane?”
The lawyer, happy to be summarized in such a rapid manner, nodded his head.
“We need an oral answer, Counselor .”
Realizing his error, he vocalized.
“Oh, sorry. Yes, Your Honor, the definition of insanity clearly states one has lost touch with reality. Since reality is most clearly observed through the physical, and terrain the most physical manifestation we have on the planet, then because my clients were out of touch with location they should be classified as insane.”
The judge, a man not known for many words, upheld his persona.
“Denied.”
Threadbare, not known for a quick wit, also reinforced his reputation.
“Huh?”
“Your plea of insanity is denied.”
The counselor looked upon the judge with pleading eyes.
“I said denied, Counselor.”
He turned to the three with a look of complete bafflement and then turned back around.
“Um… Your Honor?”
“Yes, Counselor?”
“May I have a minute to consult with my clients?”
“Yes, but make it fast.”
He huddled them around the defendant’s table and told them what he thought.
“Okay, um, I think we’re in trouble.”
“What?” the three asked as one.<
br />
He summed up his thoughts rather abruptly.
“I didn’t think we’d lose the insanity ruling. I believe you should probably change your plea to guilty.”
The three, not taught in the ways of legal proceedings, asked the obvious.
“What happens if we plead guilty?”
Threadbare, taught but not mastered in the art of legal maneuvering, held up his hand for silence. He then turned to the judge and pondered his query.
“Um… Your Honor?”
“Yes?”
“What’s the penalty for trespassing on Lawlessness’ lands?”
“Death.”
He stiffened with shock, turned back around, knelt down and conferred.
“Um… okay. I don’t think pleading guilty is such a good idea.”
The three stared back at him with mouths wide open, astonishment on their faces and puzzlement in their eyes.
“Did he say death? Did he just say trespassing was punishable by death?”
Threadbare, never one to mince words responded accordingly.
“Yes.”
The three, not ones to take death sitting down, stood.
“The heck with this!”
The guards, aware of the three’s status within the mercenary ranks, acted as one and responded with swords.
“Freeze!”
The judge, unaccustomed to weapons drawn in his presence, voiced his displeasure.
“Order!”
And everyone turned to face the man in black robe, funny white wig wielding a hammer of questionable strength.
“Everyone will sit back down this very second!”
When everyone did he amended his orders.
“Everyone except the guards!”
When the sentries returned to their sentry ways the judge proceeded.
“Now, look, while it’s true the sentence of death is on the table for trespassing on Lawlessness’ lands, as far as I know, it has never been employed. Now, unless Mother Mayeye herself orders me differently, I will most likely be inclined to…”
He stopped because his bailiff appeared behind him and handed over a note. He unfolded, read, looked up with worry, glanced at the defendants, re-folded the note, handed it back to the bailiff and spoke.
“Court is adjourned for one hour. The defendants are to remain in custody.”
Everyone wondered what was written on the note. Everyone but three.
“We are so dead.”
“She wouldn’t.”
“Why wouldn’t she? We’ve already done the job and this way she gets off without paying.”
Threadbare was not partial to their way of thinking.
“What are you gentlemen talking about?”
Savage, ever the leader, answered the counselor’s question.
“Mother Mayeye is going to order the judge to sentence us to death.”
The counselor was appalled.
“Surely, she wouldn’t!”
His umbrage was tempered by a knock on the door. They were sitting around a table, the three shackled and chained while a guard stood sentry outside. Threadbare opened the door, the guard whispered something in his ear, his eyes opened wide, he stepped out and closed the door behind him.
“Oh crap.”
The door opened and two women entered.
“Oh double crap.”
One had black hair, the other blonde.
“Hello, Sergeant Savage, I don’t believe we’ve met?”
Savage sat dumbstruck. He’d heard of the blonde’s beauty before but never seen it up close. She had a particular allure about her. There were frown lines around her mouth, a stillness in her pose and the air of chilliness about her demeanor.
“Queen Ann Archy?”
It was reported she never smiled. She gave truth to the rumor by nodding her head while keeping a stern outer shell. The one next to her did not.
“Hello, Savage.”
The smiling brunette held an odd reputation. She’d never been married although she certainly held the talents. She was slim of figure, dark as ebony with lips the color of blood. It was said she held on to power through secret alliances cemented with coin. As Savage would learn she was a professional in its use.
“Mother Mayeye” he said lowering his head in slight subordination. While he thought she was the reason for their troubles, he held hope he was wrong.
“I believe you’re probably wondering why you’re here?”
She gazed upon the mercenary as she asked. It was her tell. Another noticed.
“I was wondering about that. But now I know.”
Mother Mayeye altered her stare to view the one who’d spoken.
“Oh? What do you know?”
Deadaim looked her squarely in the eye and answered.
“You wish to marry Sergeant Savage. You wish to cement your rule by partnering with one who cannot be challenged.”
The shock in her eye revealed the archer to be on target. She vowed to keep an eye on a man who could read others with a glance. She then got down to business.
“Yes, you are correct.”
The others in the room had differing reactions.
“What?” said Savage.
“Wow!” said Brutus.
The blonde said nothing. Something was a little off with her expression, she was gazing upon the barbarian as though she knew the man.
“The archer is correct. I need a man to lead my army and ensure my security. Up till now I’ve been able to provide for myself but if the rumors are true then the time for peace has ended. It is said King Rot is on the move. I do not wish for him to seek my realm. I have been on the lookout for one he would rather not battle. Sergeant, your reputation precedes you. I was fairly certain you were the one but was convinced when you tracked down our little charade of pillagers in such rapid fashion.”
Savage was aghast. He didn’t even know the woman.
“You can’t be serious!”
She looked upon him as a cat does a mouse. Already in her clasp and keenly interested.
“I am deadly serious. And if you wish to avoid the death sentence I would advise you to consider my offer.”
Savage looked at the others in the room. The others he counted as friends. The others whose wisdom he relied upon.
“Don’t look at me.”
“I’m neutral on this one.”
And then returned his stare to the woman with raven hair.
“Hold on! Was this all a ruse?”
Obviously it was because she’d already told him so. He actually knew the answer but his mind was reeling and he was looking for a little time. She was not in the mood to give it.
“We will be married this afternoon. After you three have been convicted and sentenced to hang.”
The statement brought about the required reactions.
“Huh?”
“What?”
“Come again?”
She smiled. It wasn’t their fault. They were men, after all.
“You didn’t think I would just take your word for it? That all you had to do was agree to my demands and then run away afterward, did you?”
“Um…”
“Err…”
“Uh…”
She giggled. She thought it was going to be a lot of fun tormenting the man who could not be bested in combat.
“Here’s what’s going to happen. Queen Ann will attend court and declare her outrage at your infringement upon her sovereign territory. We, of course, will council leniency but she will have no part of it. We will reluctantly relent, the three of you will be sentenced to hang and the audience will be outraged. For some reason they seem to like you. They actually hold the three of you in esteem.”
She was walking the room as she spoke. She was quite the commanding figure, so much so, Brutus found himself nodding his head as if agreeing with her declarations.
“Anyway, with the outrage will come a silver lining. I, their gracious Queen, will feign a broken heart for I secretly love
Savage and cannot rule over a peoples who put to death one I hold dear. Queen Ann, seeing my plight, will come to the rescue. She will remind everyone that a Monarch, and thus her spouse, holds immunity. Therefore, if Savage were to marry me he would be unable to break the law since he cannot break that which does not affect him.”
The logic was so conclusive Brutus was brought to oratory effect.
“That’s brilliant.”
She smiled.
Deadaim, not as quick to render brilliance a verdict, held a doubt.
“Um, Brutus?”
“Yes?”
“The immunity only applies to royalty. We’ll still be dead.”
Brutus, after realizing the glass he viewed as half-full was actually upside-down, reworded his earlier comment.
“That plan sucks!”
The young blonde queen in the room smiled. She actually smiled.
“Do not worry, Barbarian Brutus, you will not see the end of the hangman’s noose. After Sergeant Savage has agreed to marry Mother Mayeye I will offer, as my present ,the gift of pardon. The two of you will go free and all will bask in the glory of such kind rulers.”
Brutus, a little taken back by the young woman’s tone, again reworded his previously reworded words.
“Okay, the plan sounds good again.”
It did sound good. To Brutus. To Deadaim. To everyone in the room save one. The one who saw his relationship status both increase dramatically with marriage to a monarch and decrease substantially with a vow of monogamy.
“I don’t think…”
She revealed how their marriage would work with two sentences.
“Don’t think. Just do as I command and your friends will live to see another day.”
So the three found themselves back in court, facing the judge.
“I sentence you to death.”
And the crowd reacted as planned.
“Boo!”
Which allowed the young blonde ruler to make a remark.
“If Savage marries Mother Mayeye he cannot be put to death.”
So the citizens waited with baited breath to see if the hero would pop the question.
“Seriously? I have to propose?”
Which, of course, she made him do because she was enjoying her little game.
“Fine! Will you marry me you conniving witch?”
Which she agreed to do and with it came the pardon.
“I, Queen Ann Archy, do pardon the comrades of Sergeant Savage as my wedding gift.”
And the population was pleased. So pleased they stood in line to receive tickets which would be raffled for attendance to the ceremony. The speed with which everything occurred was a blur and before he knew it Savage stood on a dais in the courtyard awaiting the moment when his single life would end and his servitude of marriage begin. He was not in a good mood. He was standing next to Deadaim who was acting as his best man. They were awaiting the arrival of the bride to be. On the stage with them was the judge who had sentenced them to death. He was acting in his official capacity and would preside over the wedding vows. He was smiling wide as the joyous occasion was infectious.
“What if I kill the judge? Can the ceremony take place without him?”’
His smile vanished.
“You can’t kill the judge, Sergeant.”
“Why not?”
Deadaim knew Savage so responded with the appropriate answer.
“Because he’s innocent in this matter.”
Savage, realizing the truth, responded as he thought appropriate.
“Crap!”
And the judge’s smile returned, although a little less joyously.
The ceremony began with the sound of an organ. It was, to Savage, the most depressing tune he’d ever heard. To everyone else it merely announced the arrival of their ruler, a ruler who’d changed apparel, a ruler who was incredibly seductive.
“Wow!”
Both mercenaries looked up.
“Sorry, I got caught off-guard there.”
They forgave the judge his outburst and again watched as Mother Mayeye made her way down the aisle. She was quite attractive and if Savage weren’t so opposed to forced companionship he might’ve felt a bit anxious. As it was he felt trapped.
“Crap, crap, crap.”
While Savage was uttering a mildly vulgar word with little meaning Deadaim was scanning the crowd. He caught sight of Brutus who was in conversation with the young, blonde queen of Lawlessness. He was regaling her with some story or another and it appeared she was rapt with fascination. He allowed his eye to wander and focused on a group of men. They appeared out of place. They were also keenly interested in the ruler who was interested in the barbarian.
“Savage?”
“Crap, crap… huh?’”
Deadaim indicated with his head the direction he wished Savage to look, the Sergeant did and came to the same conclusion as the archer.
“Uh-oh.”
“Yep.”
There were at least ten, probably more in the crowd and they were making their way toward Queen Ann Archy and Brutus, the largest barbarian in all the realms and current fable-teller to the reigning monarch of a land without laws.
“Do you think…?” Savage asked.
“Yep” Deadaim responded.
The act was not exactly new. It had been done on previous occasions for the sole reason it worked. Removing heads of state was a difficult process for one reason; location. While in their palaces or strongholds rulers were virtually impossible to touch. They were surrounded by loyal soldiers who were ever on the alert for malcontents. They knew all the secret passageways and screened anyone who had an audience with their sovereign. It was during special occasions where rulers were vulnerable. They were generally in unfamiliar surroundings, had absolutely no idea who was friend or foe and were guarded by fewer of their own because they were under the protection of the one they were visiting. It made for perfect assassination attempts. Or kidnappings.
“We need to warn them.”
“I agree.”
So the two did what they felt was necessary; Savage drew his sword and leapt from the stage while Deadaim performed his own unique brand of assassination and kidnapping prevention.
“…so there I was, facing down the raiders from the north when all of a sudden…”
Thunk!
“What the…?”
The arrow at his feet was familiar. The barbarian looked up, caught Deadaim’s eye, followed his line of sight to the men approaching and quickly surmised what was going on.
“Queen?”
She was staring with confusion at the arrow which was still quivering in the ground. Her guards hadn’t even noticed its arrival.
“Queen!”
She looked up at the mercenary and saw something she’d never seen before; worry for her sake.
“We must move!”
She had no idea what he was talking about. She had no idea men were making their way through the crowd toward her location. She had no idea why but she readily agreed to follow the man she’d only laid eyes upon a few hours before, a man not much into adulthood, a man who had done what she thought impossible; a man who could make her smile.
Things took on a different look. When Savage leapt off the dais those who were not infatuated with their amazingly alluring monarch noticed. It appeared the man had cold feet. Some thought to intervene.
“Hey! Hold on there a minute, pal! Where do you think you’re…?”
Then found muteness when he lifted his sword.
“Oh! Never mind.”
He raced through the crowd, shoving others out of his way as he made a beeline to the area where Brutus and Queen Ann Archy stood. He met them halfway as they moved toward him.
“Brutus!”
“Sergeant!”
They stood still for a second, unsure of the proper direction to take. It revealed its way a second later as a man attacked from behind.
“For King Rot!”
Sla
sh!
Thud.
“Yuck!”
The sword-stroke was involuntary, a natural response from unknown hours of training.
“Nice one, Sergeant!”
“Thank you. So, uh… which way?”
Brutus, by far the larger of the two indicated a direction Savage was rather reluctant to take.
“Are you sure?”
Brutus, unaware of why his Sergeant would doubt his advice, indicated that ‘yes’ he was pretty sure the assassins were coming from one direction and they should head in the other.
“Maybe we should just kill all the attackers instead.”
The barbarian, unaware of groom jitters, was perplexed.
“There’s about fifteen of them!”
Savage, aware of his and his friend’s abilities, countered.
“Is that all? Shoot, I bet we could take them out in about…”
Deadaim, arriving to hear the last of the conversation, intervened.
“Let’s go!”
And so the three, with the young monarch in tow moved away from the attacking assassins in King Rot’s employ to find themselves face to face with the Sergeant’s greatest fear.
“What the heck is going on?”
It took but a second to sum up the story.
“King Rot has sent assassins.”
And Mother Mayeye was not a happy camper.
“On my wedding day?”
The place was in complete chaos. Everywhere one looked people were running about shrieking in terror. It became plainly obvious the security forces were overwhelmed. Not only were Queen Ann Archy’s bodyguards not in view but Mother Mayeye’s elite brand of warriors were also in a state of confusion. All looked around blankly as everyone ran for cover.
“My God! I pay them for this?”
Savage, unaccustomed to a ruler who showed little fright, was actually a bit intrigued.
“Are you not afraid?”
Her answer would forever cause him consternation.
“Nope. I find this rather exhilarating.”
He smiled. She smiled. Another acted rationally.
“Um, maybe you two could discuss this after we’ve gotten the women to safety?”
They took Deadaim’s advice and ushered the women through the grounds until they came upon the castle proper. A door awaited and Deadaim was rather anxious to see the two inside. Four others were not.
“So? This was exciting!”
“Yes! Yes it was.”
The archer, standing with arrow strung, listened as two couples attempted to alternate time.
“I think you’re wonderful, Brutus.”
“Well, thank you. I think you’re pretty nice yourself.”
The archer was growing impatient.
“Get inside!”
Absolutely no one paid heed to his warning.
“This doesn’t mean the wedding is off.”
“Huh…?”
Mother Mayeye’s statement gave him an ample opportunity.
“Get the women inside!”
And the two mercenaries who held the fascination of two rulers acquiesced.
“All right, girls, it’s time to get to safety.”
The women, not accustomed to taking orders but also not accustomed to assassination attempts, acceded to their demands.
“Okay, but when you’re done…” the brunette said.
“Fine, but afterwards we’ll…” the blonde stated.
The two mercenaries, awestruck by feminine beauty were somewhat ill-prepared for their thoughts. The women entered the safety of the castle and they stood there, a bit perplexed by the exiting comments.
“We’ve got fifteen guys advancing!”
And then they weren’t.
“Sweet!”
“About time!”
And so Deadaim’s worries evaporated. He smiled. In the middle of the battle he actually smiled. It was not lost on those they faced.
“Oh crap!”
They moved as though walking through a cornfield. Everywhere they went others were sowed. They were something out of time; Immortals who saw not adversaries but slight pebbles in their path. The two were unstoppable. The one who remained behind their guide. Arrows were employed by their opposition. They met their twin as Deadaim cleared the path for two who were unassailable. They eliminated all others and were in pursuit of the last when reality hit.
“Um, do you two really want to do this?” the archer said as he joined them.
They looked around, confused with bloodlust, unaware one was not.
“Huh?”
“If you kill them all, you’ll be free to return.”
It took a second for the information to sink in.
“Oh!”
“Uh-oh!”
The two became aware of a truth, a unyielding fact; they were only the masters of their destiny so long as they avoided those who were more intelligent, those with a prettier scent, those who should, but didn’t, govern all.
“Let’s get out of here.”
And so they left. Vowing never to return. Until fate intervened. Proving vows were ever breakable.
“You don’t think she still intends to marry me?”
“It’s a possibility. It’s also a possibility she intends to kill you.”
And so the boat sailed along the Lazy River, three up top reminiscing about past events, two down below ridding themselves of everything they held inside while seven Elvin surrounded them, hidden from their eyes, ready to pay back what the Guild demanded.