He had begun to change.
Not on the outside – at least he didn’t think so – but on the inside. His stomach was altering, and his heart, and other parts he couldn’t even identify, all stretching and contracting, transforming like an insect larva inside a chrysalis. A sudden panic had flooded through him and his body had begun to writhe, his arms and feet to flail about unbidden, as though seeking to shake it off. But the weird and terrifying transformation remained beyond his control. Again he had heard that soft, comforting voice, and eventually his body had become still, apparently accepting the changes of which his mind could make no sense.
Rufus could only conclude that these bizarre sensations had, indeed, been a product of his fever. Which was gone now, he realised with a start. In fact, he felt remarkably well – and hungry! How long he had gone without food, he had no idea, but right now he was ravenous enough to make short work of a three-course meal. He sat up and looked about him, half expecting to find himself back in England, so different did he feel, but his eyes made out the now familiar wood panelling of his tiny cabin, his cabin trunk – all the usual trappings of daily life aboard the Orion, although someone had fastened the brass cover over the porthole. That must be why it was so dark. Jumping out of bed, he opened the porthole cover to see a choppy sea beneath a lightening sky. It must be early morning. No wonder he was so famished!
It appeared someone had thought of this eventuality, however; on his bedside table was a tray containing two slices of buttered bread, now curling at the edges, a wedge of hard-looking cheese, and a rather wrinkled apple. He seized one of the pieces of bread, but the very smell of it made his gorge rise. What on earth was going on? Granted, the food was not particularly appetising, but still…
He picked up the piece of cheese and bit off a chunk, but was forced to spit it out again as his stomach rebelled at the taste and the feel of it on his tongue. Puzzled, and more than a little annoyed, Rufus threw the cheese back onto the plate. Perhaps he wasn’t yet as well as he’d thought. He’d heard of people who had gone for some time without food losing their appetite for it, at least temporarily. He’d have to ask Doctor Wells on his next visit. In the meantime, he supposed he might as well get dressed.
It was while he was attempting to ferret out some clean underwear that it occurred to him there might be another explanation for his sudden aversion to food. What if Serafina had…? But she wouldn’t – not without his agreement. Would she? With a moan of horror, Rufus staggered to his bed on legs suddenly weak, and fell onto it, fear and hunger contracting his gut until the pain was all but unbearable. He curled himself into a tight ball, hands clasped about his knees as he lay gasping in agony. Then he heard footsteps approaching the cabin. Assailed by a fresh wave of panic, he turned to stare at the door, flinching as it began to open.
To his amazement, it was not Serafina who stood there, but one of the young ladies with whom he had danced at the ball, although he couldn’t recall her name. What on earth was she doing here, especially without a chaperone, and what was wrong with her? She appeared to be sleepwalking – but that was ridiculous. Then he saw Serafina. She was standing close behind the girl, propelling her into the room. All at once things became completely – horrendously – clear to Rufus. Serafina had been part of what he had mistaken for fever dreams. It was her voice murmuring comforting words to him while he…while she…
Feeling sick to his core, he demanded, “What have you done to me, Serafina?”
Her eyes slid away from his. “I’ve made you well, Rufus. You were so ill, I thought you would die. Doctor Wells thought so, too. He said you had pneumonia, and there was nothing he could do. How could I leave you to die when I could make you well again?”
Rufus glared at her. “And what else have you made me?”
“But you know, don’t you?”
“Say it! Tell me what you did!”
“Oh, please don’t be angry, Rufus.” Tears welled up in Serafina’s eyes and began to slide down her cheeks. “I love you so much, and I couldn’t bear to lose you. I sat there and watched you in pain, dying, and I couldn’t bear it! Then I thought if you were as I am, you wouldn’t be ill, not ever again, and all Anton’s arguments against my loving you wouldn’t matter any more. Can’t you see, my love, now we can be together always, and Anton can’t have any objection to it, can he?”
“Oh, I imagine he might have one or two.” Rufus’s voice was hard with anger and misery. “Do you think he’d approve of your just going around making people vampires, willy-nilly? Do you? Good God, Serafina, how could you be so—so selfish?”
Serafina’s eyes widened. “Selfish? How—?”
“Did you stop to consider what I might want?”
“But I asked you. You said you wanted to be with me forever. You said you trusted me to bring you across safely, and I have!”
A note of defiance had crept into her voice that merely served to increase Rufus’s anger. “For God’s sake, Serafina, I was delirious with fever! I could have said anything!”
“But you didn’t,” she pointed out. “You told me you wanted to live.”
“Well, of course I did! It doesn’t mean I wanted to spend the next God knows how long having to drink human blood, having to creep about in the shadows for fear of being found out! Serafina, I don’t give a damn what you are, I love you anyway. But—this?” Speechless, he spread his hands as though presenting to her the full horror of what she had done to him.
Serafina looked at him, her dark eyes brimming with love as well as tears. “I know you feel strange just now. You’re still becoming vampire. Your body has changed – you’ll already have felt that – but the mind takes a little longer. Soon you’ll leave your human fears behind, but until then, please know that I’m with you. I’ll teach you what you need to know, I promise.”
During this exchange, the young woman had continued to stand stock still, deaf to their voices, staring ahead of her with unseeing eyes. Rufus, however, had felt the gnawing inside him grow until it seemed to radiate out in waves from the very hub of his being, engulfing him in a hunger so fierce it seemed beyond endurance. It was as though he were being consumed from the inside by something so ravenous it must surely eat him alive if it was not fed. He gazed at the girl and realised she smelled utterly delicious, her blood warm and sweet in her veins, inviting him to partake of it. He could hear her heart beating with the soft rhythm of a drum. He felt a sudden, fiery surge of excitement. He looked at Serafina, unsure what to do next. She smiled and led the unresisting girl towards the bed, pushing her down onto it. Another great wave of hunger engulfed Rufus so that he almost cried out with the pain of it. Serafina smiled encouragement and gave him a little push forward. Simultaneously terrified and excited, Rufus sat down beside the girl and pushed her heavy brown hair back from her neck. He stared at the bluish veins throbbing there just beneath the soft smoothness of her skin, at once fascinated and repulsed. Then both revulsion and hesitation gave way to a fierce, desperate longing as his new senses filled with the scent of sweet, warm blood. At the same time, he felt a sharp tingling in his gums, and his canine teeth elongated into the needle-sharp fangs he had seen in Serafina’s mouth. Instinctively, he bent to the girl’s neck and sank them into a vein and felt the hot blood flow into his mouth.
How delectable it tasted, how sweet, the pure life force pouring into him, spurting against his throat, flowing over his tongue with the texture of warm honey and tinged with the taste of metal, awakening such a sharp, thrilling pleasure in him that he wanted it never to stop.
He became aware of something shaking him, tearing him away from the source of his delight. With a snarl, he raised his head to see Serafina smiling down at him, her dark eyes gleaming with something akin to pride.
“No more,” she whispered, “or you’ll kill her.”
Disappointed, Rufus sat back, light-headed from the blood rushing through his veins. Serafina pulled the girl to her feet and straightened her gown where Rufus
’s grasp had creased it.
“I’ll return soon,” she whispered, and led the girl from the room.
Moments later, she was back. Closing the door softly, she smiled and held out her arms to him. Rufus went to her and she held him close and kissed him, her tongue delicately gathering up the traces of blood that still clung to his lips, every touch sending sweet sparks of fire shooting along his nerves.
“So,” she said at last, with a mischievous smile, “I have a new brother.”
“Not a brother. I want you too much for that.”
“You’re vampire now,” she said, tracing his lips with her finger, and licking it with the tip of her tongue. “We share the same blood, you and I. You’re my brother, my child, and my lover. We’ll always be together.”
“Yes!” breathed Rufus, for the first time gaining some inkling of what this meant.
He felt a tingle of fear ripple through him, not just fear of what being a vampire might mean for him, but of Serafina herself. The gaze she turned on him was filled with such intensity it seemed he might drown in her eyes. Yet along with fear came excitement. A sensation akin to electricity pulsed between them, prickling along the surface of his skin until all he could think of was Serafina’s lips against his. As though she had read his thoughts, she drew him close and kissed him again, not the tentative kiss of an inexperienced girl, but hard and passionate, her tongue and lips caressing his mouth as her hands caressed his body. Somehow he managed to manoeuvre both of them to the bed, tugging at the buttons of her gown with clumsy fingers as he did so. Serafina smiled, and gently disengaged herself, her deft fingers accomplishing what his could not. He helped her to remove her gown, his hands caressing her, savouring the smooth lines of her body and the delicious longing it aroused in him. Kneeling before her, he quickly unlaced her black-patent boots and pulled them off, running his hands up the curves of her legs beneath her petticoats, seeking the garters that held up her stockings. As he rolled the first stocking down, he pushed back her petticoats and kissed the inside of her knee. Serafina gasped, and he felt her hands grasp him tightly by the shoulders. Seconds later, both stockings lay on the floor. Rufus’s jacket soon followed. Serafina pulled open his shirt, pushing her hands inside it, caressing him as she removed it. Her touch was like cool water flowing over his skin, yet it seemed to fill him with liquid fire until he was consumed by such a longing that he felt he must die unless he could melt into Serafina and become part of her.
As though reading his thoughts, she turned so that he could unlace her corset. She pulled it off and flung it to the floor. As his hands slid inside her soft linen shift, she held up her arms so he could remove it. It joined the rest of their clothes. Her hair had fallen loose, and Rufus lifted it back so he could gaze at her. Slowly, his eyes drank her in, delighting in the long, straight lines of her slim body. He reached out and ran a finger along her cheek and down her neck, tracing the line of her collarbone and the slight swell of breasts so tiny they were almost like those of a girl. Her skin was as white and smooth as a statue, but it no longer felt cold to his touch. His hand continued to trail down her body until he reached the dark triangle of her pubic hair. Just above it was a tiny constellation of moles, and he bent to kiss it. Serafina drew in a sharp breath, releasing it in a sigh of longing.
“So much clothing,” she murmured, touching her hand to the only part of his body still clad, and squeezing gently so he could be in no doubt of her meaning. Then she undid the buttons and helped him to pull off his trousers.
With his eyes closed, Rufus savoured her hands stroking him until he was forced to stop her, gasping, “No, please, I won’t be able to…”
She laid a finger across his lips. “Hush. Look at me.” Rufus opened his eyes and she gently pulled his face down to hers, and he was lost once more in the depths of her dark eyes. “Now,” she whispered, “now, please!” She took his hand and pulled it to her, pushing it against her so he could feel she was ready for him, giving little gasps and moans as his fingers slid inside her, gently stroking the delicious softness of her. “Oh, please!” Almost roughly she thrust herself against him, her fingers guiding him to where he longed to be.
As he plunged himself deep inside her, he felt as though he was penetrating the very core of her being, her soft, moist flesh surrounding him, telling him he was home at last. Very slowly, he withdrew again, prolonging the delightful sensations of her softness moving against his hardness, Serafina’s low moans assuring him that she shared his pleasure. When he was almost completely withdrawn, she thrust herself against him, pushing him inside her again. And so they helped one another to greater and greater heights until all at once it seemed to Rufus that Serafina melted around him, wave after wave of her pulsing against him, each wave drawing a cry from her parted lips, until he knew he could bear it no longer. He thrust himself hard inside her, feeling himself explode in a burst of pleasure so fierce it was scarcely distinguishable from pain.
Gasping, he collapsed against Serafina, her breast rising and falling against his. Raising himself up on one elbow, he kissed her on the mouth. Her lips moved against his, but in a way that was almost chaste compared with their former endeavours.
For some time they lay in each other’s arms, content to enjoy their closeness in silence. Then Serafina murmured, “The sun is up now. We must sleep.”
“So it’s true that vampires can’t abide daylight?” Rufus asked, not at all sure he wanted to hear the answer. Despite the fact that he now seemed able to see as clearly by night as he had by day, and despite the heightened senses that had so intensified their lovemaking, he didn’t think he wanted to forgo daylight altogether, though he feared he might have no choice in the matter.
Serafina smiled, and traced the outline of his cheek with her finger. “Not precisely. Daylight doesn’t harm us physically, as some have claimed, but like any hunting creature, our powers are greatest at night. Also, of course, it’s much safer for us to hunt under cover of darkness, so it’s natural for us to sleep during the day. For most of us, this becomes our normal pattern. It’s unusual for us to feed in the early morning as you did, but that was because of the time it took you to change. The first hunger is so intense you couldn’t have waited until tonight.”
Rufus nodded. A deep weariness had, indeed, settled over him, although he thought this was most likely because of all he’d been through recently. In the space of just a few days, he’d been severely beaten, brought to the brink of death and back again, had his insides rearranged into those of a vampire, drunk human blood, and made love with Serafina for the first time. He felt as though he’d been caught up in a vortex of new ideas and sensations and whirled about until he scarcely knew what he felt or thought any more.
As a new fear swept over him, he asked, “What about Mr Springer? What will he think of what you’ve done?”
Serafina made a not entirely successful attempt at bravado. “I shall tell him he has a new family member. He may not like it, but he’ll accept it.”
Rufus looked dubious. “What do you mean, ‘family’?”
“I’m blood of his blood, and you’re blood of my blood.” Serafina shrugged. “The same blood flows in the three of us – in vampire terms, that makes us family.”
“That certainly gives a whole new meaning to ‘blood relations’,” Rufus said, his voice teetering on the brink of hysteria. “But doesn’t that mean I’ve been making love to my sister?” He pulled away from Serafina, his face registering horror.
Serafina made a sound that could only be described as a gurgle of laughter. “Hardly any vampires are related in that way, Rufus. Our blood ties are of a different kind. We can’t breed, so why should we be affected by such – human considerations?”
As the tide of his blood ecstasy began to ebb, the full import of all that had happened struck Rufus with the force of a heavy blow. He was a vampire. One of the un-dead. Forever!
Although he had to admit he had not wanted to die, had longed for some way to
be with Serafina, had even harboured fantasies of becoming her willing victim, this was so far beyond anything he could have imagined that his head spun from attempting to comprehend it. Worst of all, as horrifying as the prospect of being a vampire was, there was some part of him that was excited by the new path that stretched before him.
A sudden realisation broke through Rufus’s reverie.
“Doctor Wells! He’s coming back to check on me this morning. We can’t sleep until he’s been.”
Serafina heaved a sigh and sat up. “You’re right. I must dress, and you should put your nightshirt on.” She reached over the side of the bed and picked it up, an expression of distaste spreading over her face as she surveyed the crumpled and sweat-stained article. “I’ll get you a clean one.”
Throwing the offending garment into a corner with the rest of Rufus’s clothes, she jumped out of bed, found one in his cabin trunk that, if not precisely clean, had at least been somewhat aired, and tossed it to him before gathering up her own clothes.
Doctor Wells arrived to find Rufus sitting up in his nightshirt and Serafina perched on the edge of his bed looking demure. As they had arranged between them, they told the doctor Rufus’s fever had broken during the night and he was beginning to feel better. Rufus had been terrified Doctor Wells would want to examine him, and would find abnormalities, but Serafina had reassured him that could easily be dealt with.
“You must watch what I do when he arrives,” she had told him in a tone that had reminded him of his nanny when he was a little boy. “What I do, you can do also when you need to.”
A Different Hunger Page 10