I love the caramel color of his lips. The bottom one is bigger than the top. It’s the perfect mixture of hard on top and soft on bottom.
The way his bottom lip feels between my teeth is amazing. And that thought alone makes me hot for him.
That’s the other thing he does to me. No matter what, his touch makes me want him. That’s all he ever had to do when I caught him messing around. If he could catch me and hold me for only a moment or two, I’d be putty in his hands.
That’s the only reason the last time was the one that counted. I got on a plane and left. He couldn’t come knocking at my bedroom window and crying for me to let him in.
I remember one time I managed to stay away from him for three days after I caught him with someone else. We ran into each other in the grocery store. I turned to walk away from him as fast as my feet would take me.
He caught me and pulled me into his strong arms. The he whispered how sorry he was and how he loved me and would never do it again. And I left the damn store with him.
I was way too easy where he was concerned and it does occur to me I’m being way too easy again. Looking at his face makes my heart ache. No matter how hard I might try to walk away from him again, I know I can’t until he does something wrong.
Which I do think he’ll do. But damn it, I hope and pray he doesn’t. I want him so damn bad, it’s not logical.
I want to see a little boy running around our house who looks just like him. I want to see that face when it’s full of wrinkles and I bet I’ll still find it the best thing I’ve ever seen.
My world is in this man and I have no idea why. Without him, my heart has grown hard and cold. My mind has ruled my life.
If nothing else, hopefully, this time with him will heal me somehow. I didn’t realize I was so broken. Not until he came back into my life.
Back when I was young I had aspirations for my life. One day, I was going to have a family. Back then it was always Jason who I saw as the man I’d have a family with. He’d be the daddy, and I’d be the mommy and we’d be a happy family.
And somewhere inside me, I think it could really happen. He does seem to want to change. But then again, he always did before too.
I believed him every single time he told me he’d never cheat again. Every damn time I believed him.
Looking back, I can see how stupid I was. Stupid as hell over only this man right here. Maybe that’s my curse in this life.
At least I’m not stupid over every man. I have that going for me at the very least.
I should thank my lucky stars that the powers that be decided only one man would be my weakness. I could’ve been dealt a hand where all men were.
Time has been put into the men who now have tiny parts in my life. I wonder if this thing with Jason doesn’t work out if any of them will want anything to do with me again.
I’ve maintained with each of them that I do not want any kind of relationship as each one of them has asked me to give them a shot at something real with me. I’ve declined the numerous invitations to become a couple with all of them.
What will they think about me giving Jason this shot? What will happen if he cheats on me and I end it for good? Will any of my men be there for me? Or will they all hate me for being a liar?
Because I suppose that’s how they’ll think of me after this. I told them all I would be single forever. I told each one of them I would never be in a serious relationship and not to take it personally.
Staying the night isn’t a thing I’ve done with any of them. And here it is the second night I’ve stayed with Jason.
And I cannot believe Ugly Ryan wanted to fight with Jason over me. I did not see him doing that. I really do need to make Jason apologize to the poor guy.
I’m no better than Jason is. He may be lying to those women and I may be telling the men in my life the truth but we’re both wrong. In different ways and in the same ways. We are both wrong.
Perhaps we can help each other and in the process create something good out of all the crap we’ve made out of our lives.
I cuddle back into Jason and close my eyes. Tomorrow is a new day and I think taking one day at a time is what I need to do.
It sounds good, anyway.
Chapter 6
JASON
Watching the cook as she makes us breakfast and the housekeeper as she cleans, I can see some very odd looks on their faces. Both were beyond surprised when I emerged from the bedroom.
The really odd part is that neither spoke to me. They nodded in acknowledgment but no words were uttered nor have been.
Sitting at the little breakfast nook table, I sip on some black coffee as Brittany taps away at her computer. Tired of waiting in silence, I ask, “So what do you say to a trip back home, Sweedoms?”
She looks up and makes a frowny face. “How about anywhere but there?”
“Because there is the perfect place to go. It’s been a while since you went back,” I take another sip of the hot coffee and wish like hell I was back at my place with my special cream I like to put in my coffee.
With a shake of her head, she says, “Nah. You can go if you want.”
I put the cup down and give her a look that only she will know. It’s my, I’m not taking no for an answer look. She almost rolls her eyes at me, but stops mid-roll.
“Good job, Brat. Oops, I mean Britt,” I say with a smile. “Come on, we can rent that cabin that only the tourists rent when they visit our sleepy little town. Our families will get a kick out of it. It has the swimming pool and that game room. We can invite all of them to come back home for a visit. A family reunion kind of thing. I need to bury the hatchet with your family, that’s for sure. Our families need to really get to know each other, anyway.”
“Why is that?” She looks really confused.
“Because you and I are going to get married, duh,” I say and roll my eyes at her then laugh.
The laptop lid closes, and she looks at me with a very serious expression. “Let’s not get too ahead of ourselves, Dearest. We’re only two days into this week long trial project. After we see how things go, then we can plan a trip back home. Until then, I’d rather not involve too many people into our experiment.”
“I hate that you keep thinking about us failing. We will only fail if one of us doesn’t put forth the effort to build what we have. We already have this great foundation…”
Her hand goes up, stopping me. “This is not a great foundation, Jason. This is a very unstable foundation. Trust has to be built. Speaking of that. What do you plan on doing about your women, here in New York at least, while we give this thing a whirl?”
“What do you plan on doing about your goon squad of boy toys?” I counter her question.
“My men are in check. They know who holds the reins in those relationships. If you can call them that. Your women think you’re going to marry them. It’s quite different.” She points out.
“Hence, why we should get the hell out of here for this week, Sweet potato,” I say and get up to move in behind her, wrapping my arms around her, nuzzling her neck. “I want to go to a place that’s neither mine nor yours. A place we can be together, alone.”
She looks back at me with a smile. “You don’t like my staff, Baby?”
I whisper, “Why do they not talk to me?”
“I think because they’re shocked to see a man here. Don’t let it bother you. They probably think you’re a ghost or something like that.” She laughs and I bite her neck, turning that laugh into a low moan.
“Go pack, I’m taking you to someplace I’ve never been. Bring a few bathing suits, the skimpier the better. Some light dresses for when we go out in the evenings. Maybe a few shorts and little tops. Sandals, you know that kind of stuff.”
“Island wear?” she asks as she smiles. “Now that idea, I love.”
“Good,” I say then kiss the top of her head. “Since I have a stalker at my place, I’ll get Donovan to pack my things and bring them here. Then h
e can take us to the airport.”
“Where are we going? Should I take my passport?” she asks as she gets out of her chair.
“Definitely, I’ll make some calls and get things going. A private jet, I’m thinking. A little mile high action in the bedroom. What do you think?” I ask but I know what her answer will be.
She merely nods and takes my hand, pulling me along behind her. “Come with me to help me pick things out. You can make your calls in the bedroom.”
Moving along behind her, I notice the housekeeper cutting her eyes away from us. I hope that woman isn’t someone Britt plans on keeping around once we move in together. She gives me the heebie-jeebies and so does the cook who doesn’t even cook good.
We had scrambled, tasteless egg whites with one piece of bacon each and a small glass of milk for breakfast. It was terrible and I’m starving to death.
***
One hour later, we’re in my car heading to the airport with reservations for a bungalow in Bora Bora. Brittany is nestled into my side as she looks at her phone at the site I sent her so she can see where I’m taking her.
“This is going to be so much fun, Jason!” Her eyes move over the screen full of crystal clear water then she looks at me. “It’s been a secret wish of mine to go there.”
“I remembered how much you liked to go to the beach back home. We’d take that five-hour car trip down to the coast, and you always lit up like a sparkler when you saw the water. I can’t wait to see your eyes when you see where we’re going.” With a little squeeze, I kiss her cheek and she squeals.
To make her happy is a thing I always loved to do. She’s easy to please. I could show up with a pint of Blue Bell ice cream and she’d make the same sound.
Her face goes all serious all of a sudden as she asks, “You’ve never taken anyone there before, have you?”
I hold up two fingers on my left hand and place my right hand over my heart. “I swear to you I have never taken anyone there. I’ve never been to Bora Bora.”
She smiles and relaxes again. “I know if this works out we will end up going places where you’ve been with other women. Just do me a favor and pretend you never went anywhere with anyone else but me. You’re a liar so you can do that for me, can’t you?”
“Whoa! I’m a liar?” I ask with a lot of indignation.
She nods and looks at me with an expression of surprise. “You are. What do you call what you’ve done all these years, Jason?”
“Um, I call it protecting people’s feelings. Not lying. God, you make me sound like a horrible person.” I take my arm off her shoulders and look out the window.
If she really thinks I’m so bad, then how is this going to work?
“Jason, you do lie to women. Like a lot. You have to know that you’re a liar.” She stares at me with a blank expression.
“Then so are you,” I say as I look right back at her.
Her hand goes to her chest and her voice goes very high as she shrieks, “Me?”
I nod. “You lie, Brittany. Don’t deny it.”
To say she looks appalled is a complete understatement. “Take me home.”
“Why?” I ask as she saw nothing wrong with calling me a liar but when it's flipped around on her she gets mad.
“I am no liar. I am a terrible liar. You can ask number seventeen on your app about that.”
I look out the window then back at her as two and two come together. “How do you know that Pamela is number seventeen?”
Her cheeks go pink. “Oh, well… Damn it! Your phone rang last night, and I looked at it. Okay? See, I can’t lie to save my life. Well, maybe if my life really depended on it I could. But the way you lie, no I could never lie like that.”
“So you looked at my app then,” I say, quietly. “And you still agreed to give me a week to prove to you I want something more with you and only you. That’s amazing, to tell the truth.”
“Yeah, forty-eight women are a major stumbling block. But, then again, so is one. So why count them, is what I was thinking. And sorry about invading your privacy like that. If the shoe was on the other foot, I’d have been furious at you,” she concedes.
I put my arm back around her and pull her in close. “Come here. I’m sorry I called you a liar. I didn’t know what to call you. I had to say something. You aren’t perfect either.”
“I never said I was.” She looks up at me. “I am a hypocrite. I came to terms with that last night. I sat there and said things to you that also pertain to me. It seems we both have things to work out. Both of us have problems that stem from way back.”
“Mine started with insecurities. I knew you were going to make something of yourself and I thought you’d leave me behind. I never had faith you’d keep me around once you got to where you were going,” I confess.
“And now that I’m here, and still want you, does that make those insecurities vanish? The truth, Jason.” She drums her fingertips on my leg as she looks at me.
“None of my insecurities have vanished, no. But I have this new thing inside of me that really wants you in my life. So, for the first time in my life, I have something to work for. I have a reason to stop my philandering ways. I hope you do too.” I take her hand in mine and raise it to my lips. “I love you, Brittany. I always have and always will. I know it in my heart.”
She looks at me with what I think is hope. I have a feeling she is hoping I will change. Hoping I will be the man she needs me to be. Hoping we can have what we both thought in the back of our minds we always would. A life together.
Donovan pulls into the busy airport and it seems that we still are on for the trip. Our little argument seems to have passed like a storm in the night. I have a feeling there’s no way we’re going to get through this week without a few of those things.
It’s to be expected when trying to get over a past that’s so flawed and move away from lives that are also terribly flawed. I’m praying we can get through this tough stuff and get to the creamy center of life.
It occurs to me, as we sit in the line of cars waiting in lines like we do for everything in New York city, that this is not a place I want to have a family. “Are you dead set on living in New York, Pudding-pop?”
With a shrug, she asks, “Not sure. Why?”
“It’s a terrible place to raise kids. I think somewhere more rural is better. Don’t you?” I run my fingertip along her thigh, moving the short skirt up a little.
“There you go again, jumping the gun. I swear, can your mind stay in any place for very long? Let’s get through this week and see if there’s a future for us. And here’s another news flash for you, Stud-muffin. Even after this week is up, there’s still going to be a period of time before I can make the type of commitment you’re talking about.”
I keep my mouth shut. This woman is a big talker. She acts like she’s so different and so in control.
I’ve been paying attention to her actions. She is still the same girl underneath this façade she’s created to make her think she knows best about everything. So I’ll let her hold onto that little unreality for a while longer.
Brittany has always given into my wants. Every last one of them and she’ll give into my want to marry her sweet little ass at the end of this week.
You can count on that!
Chapter 7
BRITTANY
For the first hour of our twelve-hour plane ride to Bora Bora, Jason has eaten like a starving man and force fed me as well. Now that we both are full, a nap seems like the thing to do to pass the time.
The private jet he chartered is at the top of the charts in the luxury department. The bedroom has a queen-size bed that’s calling my name. I lean my head on Jason’s shoulder as he leans back in the leather chair next to mine and looks out the window.
“What do you think about going to the bedroom?” I ask him.
“I think that’s a fantastic idea,” he says as he gets up and surprises me by picking me up and carrying me to the back of the jet. “I
think I’m going to keep you naked for the rest of our trip, my little apple tart.”
Laying my head on his wide chest, I sigh. “You make me feel so special, Jason.”
“Good.” He opens the door and puts me down on the bed. The man has my clothes off in no time at all.
I’m panting a little as I move back to get underneth the blanket and watch him pull his clothes off. It’s amazing how his stomach shows no signs of all the food he ate in the last hour.
“How does all that food not show?” I pull the blanket back, exposing my little food bump in my stomach and frown.
As he climbs onto the bed, he says, “It’s my tight muscles, Buttercup. And I like seeing you with some curves. You can plan on gaining at least ten pounds this week. I’m going to be feeding you like the queen you are.”
“Jason, really I…” I have to shut up as he’s decided no more talking, only kissing.
As our mouths meet, my arms flow around his neck and pull him to me. Chest to chest, we kiss and suddenly the fattening food I ate is far from my mind and all I can think about is how good this man tastes.
We finished our long meal off with a delicious red wine and its lingering in his warm mouth. I make a moan as our tongues move around together. Jason and I used to kiss forever.
He is by far the best kisser I’ve ever had. I do wonder if that alone would be a great reason to marry the man. Knowing you’ll be kissed well all through the rest of your life has to count for something.
He does this thing where he eases the kiss then gives me some light pecks just before easing back into a languid and sultry kiss again. I hate to think about him perfecting this kiss with anyone other than myself and I hope one day I learn how to push all those thoughts out of my head.
As if sensing me thinking, he moves his hands up into my hair and massages my scalp. I moan with how good it feels and sure enough, my mind focuses only on him.
I don’t know how he does it. How he gets me off one thought and right back to him and only him. He’s amazing.
He has me very relaxed as he pulls his mouth off mine and trails kisses down my chin, over my chest, stopping to pull one tit into his mouth and running his fingertips lightly over the other one, making the nipple spring up and beg for more.
The Shameless Billionaire Series: Billionaire Romance Box Set (An Alpha-Male, Billionaire, Bad Boy, Bad Girl, Romance) Page 10