by Nhys Glover
The relief was instant, and I sighed.
“Don’t you know a nettle when you see one? Why didn’t you put on those gloves before you started work on any of the plants?” He pointed at an old pair of leather gloves sitting on a high chest next to the door. “You never know what effect a plant might have on your skin. Nettles are the least of your problems.”
He looked from my hands, still covered in the green poultice, to my face. Then he paled, his eyes growing wide.
“You look remarkably like... Lady Ennia? It can’t be!” He took several jerky steps back as if he’d been hit, and his brow began to perspire.
I gave him a wan smile. “Yes, it is I. You said a noble girl could not be your assistant so I have become a slave boy.”
I went to indicate my hair but dislodged the poultice. I replaced it gingerly. “What is that leaf?”
Distractedly he answered. “Dock. It is a dock leaf. Nature often puts the cure next to the curse. So you will often find dock leaves close to nettles.”
“I know people drink nettle tea, but what good is it?” I asked, trying to avoid the issue.
Absently my physician replied, “The nettle is good for inflammation. I use it with those who have aged, swollen and painful joints.” He held up his hands to show his own swollen knuckles. How did he sew up his patients with hands like that?
“How do you feel now?” he asked, sitting down on the bench next to me. After knocking the nettles to the ground first, of course.
I studied my hands in surprise. “It is much better. That was amazing. I have much to learn.”
He scowled at me and ran his fingers through my short locks. “Your father is going to be furious when he finds out what you’ve done. I’ll be lucky to escape with my life.”
“I have a wig to wear when I am being Ennia. If necessary, Pater need never know. Well, not until I have learned all I can from you, and he can see the benefits of having a daughter skilled in the physician’s arts.”
He sighed with exasperation. “He will never see such benefits. Do you think he would want his innocent, pure and untouched daughter sewing up the guts of his gladiators? These are rough and disgusting men, little flower. You have no idea, because you have lived such a sheltered life. And the boy gladiators are not much better.”
I frowned. Though I knew my Wolf Pack were rough and a little disgusting, especially when they ate meat with filthy hands, I could not see how they affected my purity. I might go home with dirty hands after being with them, but I was in no other way changed.
Was I?
Would I know about beatings and boys being pushed beyond their limits if I had not gone to that fireside? Could my innocence be called lack of experience? And was that a good thing? I was certainly happier not knowing the terrible things that happened in the barracks, but was that ignorance wise or even noble? What if our boys became like Spartacus and his fellow gladiators, and went on a rampage, killing all those who got in their way? All because, in my ignorance, I did not step in.
I was being extreme and likely overdramatic. But it could happen. Innocence was not something I should cling to just because I was a patrician’s young daughter. Bad things still happened to girls like me. Losing my mother was evidence of that. The gods played no favourites where pain and misfortune were concerned.
“No one will know who I am. And maybe I will discover that you are right and the disgusting things you have to deal with are not for me. But I would like to try. And right now, with Lucullus adding to your workload every day, you could use me. Pater need never know.”
He looked at me uncertainly. “You promise to give up this hare-brain idea as soon as you become disgusted?”
I shrugged. “Well, there is disgusted and disgusted. I will promise to give up this idea if I become too disgusted to go on. I have no issue with blood, you know. And I can stitch up flesh. I practised on the carcasses in the kitchen. I have a very neat hand.”
“Stitching up living flesh is far different, Little Mistress. Blood makes your hands slippery and your patient is screaming in agony before you even start. Every time you insert the needle you feel his pain. It is a terrible thing.”
“And yet you have done it all your life,” I said.
He shrugged. “I was a slave who was purchased to assist a physician. I had no say in the matter.”
I looked at him closely. “You always give the impression you enjoy your work. Or at least find satisfaction from it.”
He lifted his shoulders and dropped them in defeat. “A man should find satisfaction where he can. Few have the opportunity to choose their path in life. I discovered I was good at what I did and was therefore valued for it. I believe no man can want more than to be respected and valued for their contribution to the world.”
Tilting my head to the side, I studied him closely. “You are a very wise man. I would like the opportunity to at least try to choose my path, if I may. Maybe by finding out what I do not like, one day I will discover what I do like.”
He smiled at me. “You are a surprisingly wise young lady. I wasn’t expecting that. All right. I will give you a try. We will quickly determine if this is the path for you, I am sure.”
For the rest of the day I removed leaves and stripped bark from willow branches and otherwise turned my hands into those of a field-slave. Luckily, Ariaratus had a salve I could use on them. It was made from goat milk and lanoline from sheep’s wool, amongst other things, so he informed me, and I was able to improve their condition quickly.
On the next day I was to join Ariaratus at the barracks where he had an ‘infirmary’ as he called it. It was a room where he treated ailments and housed the boys too sick to return to their dormitory rooms.
I was beside myself with excitement at the prospect of seeing the barracks for myself, and I could barely sleep a wink that night. I had won my chance to choose my own path. I may fail, or decide it was not for me, but at least I would have a chance. I had already learned some valuable lessons on herbal lore, which I would love to put into practice. But for now I would learn what I could and soak up all the experiences Ariaratus allowed me.
I snuck out of the villa just before dawn and was at Ariaratus’ door not long after that. I had not broken my fast and my stomach growled its complaint. My tutor laughed and handed me a piece of soft cheese wrapped in flat bread. I ate hungrily as I followed him happily down the hill, carrying his satchel of medicinals and tools. They were heavy but, as I thought I was likely being tested, I did not complain.
The thrill of finally discovering what the barracks were like had me almost dizzy with glee. But as soon as we entered the dark entryway we heard yelling, and my excitement turned instantly to dread. Concerned, Ariaratus looked to my safety first. I was worried, but I motioned him on.
We hurried down the narrow hallway between rooms until we reached the light. I knew what I was looking at the moment we moved into the open, having seen a plan of the barracks my father’s father had drawn up for its construction.
This was where the boys trained to be gladiators. Not an arena, as would be the case in a gladiator ludus, but more an athlete’s field such as the Greeks used when observing their games.
And this long field, surrounded on all sides by buildings, was dry, dusty and unassuming. Except for the number of young men and boys, all dressed in loin clothes, standing in it.
No, not all the boys were just standing. Four were stalking proudly toward the posts at the far end of the field. Four boys I knew well, though I had never seen them in daylight before. They looked frightening in their intensity.
“You boys, keep running!” a tattooed man ordered, pointing at the line of boys hovering nearby.
The older boys seemed to be ready for a fight. I could feel the fury in the air as easily as I might scent burning wood or taste blood. It was hard to explain. I just knew something terrible was about to happen. And my Wolf Pack was in the middle of it.
“Lucullus!” Ariaratus called. His voice
was mild, though loud enough to reach all who now stood in the morning sunshine.
So this was the infamous Lucullus, was it? Yes, I could see what a terrible man he must be—so ugly and fearsome as he glared, red-faced, at the milling boys. And he was a little mad, too, I determined, even though I had never seen true madness before.
Lucullus turned in our direction and began trotting over to us, ignoring the boys. It looked as if the whole ludus, both junior and senior, was present. Was that normal? It seemed a great many boys for the area. Would they not get in each other’s way?
“I need to speak to you on a private matter. Maybe you could let the boys go early today,” Ariaratus said, loud enough for all to hear.
Lucullus glanced over his shoulder at the boys. His face lost a little of its redness. I watched him swallow.
“Yes, right you are, Physician. Boys, finish your laps and then rest. You older boys, I will see you here after midday.”
I wanted to be there when Ariaratus dressed this awful man down. But then I realised that the physician was unlikely to do any such thing. He was not in charge here. Lucullus was.
“Cassius, stay out here,” Ariaratus told me brusquely, entering a nearby room with Lucullus and closing the door behind him.
So I was not to hear this discussion. And I had a new name.
I leaned in to the rough hewn door. It had many cracks. Perfect for listening at.
“Boy, you shouldn’t do that,” a harsh whisper had me jerking away.
I turned to see Typhon grinning down at me mischievously.
I took a few steps away from the door, and into a darkened corner. Typhon came with me. The others were not far behind.
“I couldn’t believe it when I saw you. Have you done it then? Has the physician accepted you as his assistant?” Typhon asked in delight, his admiration plain in his dark slanted eyes.
I grinned. “Yes. I helped him with his dried medicinal herbs yesterday, and today we are looking in on the injured boys here. That was before whatever happened out there.” I gestured at the field where the younger boys still seemed to be milling aimlessly around.
He grimaced. “It was close. He was going to beat the four of us. But then the seniors arrived, and it looked like we were going to have a revolt. If not for your physician, it might have happened, too. It still might. Nothing is resolved. The man is mad with power. I didn’t know that before today.”
“You promised to hold on,” I accused worriedly.
“Don’t blame me. It was Talos.” He jerked his head in his pack-mate’s direction.
The dark-skinned boy rolled his eyes as if there was nothing to worry about.
“He had to save a little lad about to get a beating, didn’t he?” Typhon went on in disgust. “Then Orion jumped in, so my brother and I had no choice but to join the party. I kept thinking... Accalia is not going to be happy. Our little she-wolf is not going to be happy.”
He looked at me smugly, and I could not tell if he was teasing or not.
“Blame us, why don’t you,” Talos complained, his voice too loud. He wrapped an arm around Typhon’s shoulders and grinned down at me. “You never cease to surprise, you know that pup?”
“Pup? I am a pup now, am I?” I huffed, putting my hands on my hips and scowling, though I didn’t mean it. It felt odd to be with them here in their home and in daylight. They looked different. More... normal somehow.
“I can’t call you by your name, can I?” he said more softly, looking over his shoulder to make sure no one was close enough to hear his whisper.
It was just me and the Wolf Pack, all pressing in close enough that I could smell the sweat on their bodies. They had no tunics and I felt embarrassed by all that naked skin. They didn’t seem to notice.
“Ariaratus called me Cassius. So I suppose that is my new name.”
“How did you convince him to let you do this?” Orion demanded, shaking his blonde head with more enthusiasm than was strictly required to convey his disapproval.
“I told you. The Little Mistress asked it of him and so he agreed. But on the condition that if it gets too disgusting for me I will give up.”
“Oh, it’ll get disgusting. I bet you don’t last the week,” Asterius said with a laugh.
I huffed. “I will last if you can last.”
“Last? What do you mean?” he said with a scowl.
“Last Lucullus out, without something terrible happening.”
Typhon laughed. “I saw that one coming!”
Asterius shrugged. “It’s not us, it’s him. Do you think your physician will be able to talk sense into him?”
I shook my head. “I doubt it, if he is truly mad. I think that is beyond a physician’s ability to heal.”
Chapter Eight
TYPHON
We held out for the next week and received a special treat from Accalia when we met up for our feast. As Orion had been too exhausted to set snares the week before there hadn’t been meat to share, but Accalia had made up for it with her overstuffed sack full of enough food to feed a horde. In fact, we took care not to eat everything so we could supplement our scant meals over the following days.
Always seeing her wandering around the barracks, shadowing the physician, kept my promise to her fresh in my mind. Not that I needed her presence to do that. Like a pebble in my sandal, the girl had become stuck in my head. In my mind’s eye I saw her brilliant smile and the way her big blue-grey eyes would soften at odd moments. I was not used to someone wearing every thought and emotion on their face for all to see. It was a lesson we’d all learned early on. As Orion would say, show emotion and you show weakness. But Accalia had never learned that lesson and that made her face fascinating to watch.
Maybe I was growing into a man and that was why she got under my skin. But if that were the case, I’d be interested in womanly curves not a girl who could pass, and was passing, as a boy. I knew she was twelve now, not the nine or ten her small size had misled me to believe at first. But she was still a few years away from being a woman. No, my budding obsession with the girl was not the lust a man felt for a woman, nor was it what a brother feels for a sister. Or I didn’t think so on either count, as I could only go on what I had been told or seen of both.
I must have sighed because Talos frowned at me in question. We were cleaning armour and weapons in the armoury and had the place to ourselves as the other lads of our class, who should have been helping, were all in the infirmary.
I shrugged. “Accalia. It worries me that she’s going to be found out.” It was half true. I wasn’t going to admit to even my pack-mates that I couldn’t stop thinking about the girl.
“I’m not sure she’s good to have around,” Orion said. “She’s a distraction. I think that’s why they keep us away from females...”
“She distracts you too?” Talos asked in surprise.
I grimaced as we all exchanged guilty looks.
“She’s a female. We don’t see many females, and we’re all approaching manhood. It’s bound to happen,” Asterius added.
“She’s a little girl,” Orion argued.
“She’s twelve. Not that little.” Asterius wiggled his brows.
“You aren’t lusting after her, are you?” I demanded, feeling a protective instinct I didn’t know I had rising quickly to the surface.
My brother shook his head quickly. “No, gods, no. I just think about her a lot. I’d like to kiss her.”
I gave him a shove, even though I too had passingly wondered what kissing her would be like. I’d once kissed one of the girls in our compound. I’d been seven and she’d been six. It had been sloppy, and she’d giggled and pushed me over afterwards. Though a year younger than me, she’d been bigger and stronger, and I’d been so ashamed that I’d hidden every time I saw her from then on.
Would kissing Accalia be different to that experience? At least she couldn’t push me over. Although, for a little thing, she had a lot of fight in her. I’d learned that the hard way th
at first night.
“Nobody kisses her!” Orion announced as if it was on his mind too. “She’s part of our pack, not just any girl. We have to respect her.”
Lucullus suddenly loomed large in the doorway. “Kissing? You lads have time for talking about kissing? What girl do you get to see locked away in the barracks? Maybe you have mistaken a boy for a girl. A bit young for that sort of play, I would have thought, though once you’re in with the older boys...”
His lecherous grin made my stomach turn over sickly. I knew what he meant. I’d heard tell that the master brought in whores for the older lads so they didn’t turn their attentions on the younger boys in their barracks. Not that we expected to have problems, but I knew edgy looks were exchanged by the other lads when they thought about starting again at the bottom of the ladder. It was hard enough being the youngest in the junior barracks, but being the youngest among young men? Not a pleasant thought.
“One of the girls in the breeder compound. We see her when we visit our mothers,” Asterius said hastily. He was always quick-witted like that. I hadn’t even thought to hide Accalia’s identity, too caught up with thinking about the challenges to come in the senior barracks.
“You better not think about diddling one of them girls. You know the rules. Breeders are off-limits.”
Asterius shrugged and looked away. Going further with the conversation would be just digging us in deeper and Asterius knew it.
“Slant eyes,” Lucullus said, looking at me through narrowed eyes as if mimicking mine. “I want you to clean out my room. There’s a bad smell in there. Likely a rat has died somewhere.”
I glanced up in surprise. The doctores, assistants and tutors had their quarters between the senior and junior barracks at the opposite end of the rectangle to the dining room and classrooms. Boys never went into the tutor’s wing. It was forbidden.