by L. Wilder
“Yeah, I do. Bobby never found anything on him, so he’s got a clean record. I’m going to keep looking just to be sure.”
“Call Lily’s dad,” Bishop ordered.
“You think he knows something?” I asked.
“If not, he should be able to find out. His club is in the same town. He’s bound to know something.”
“Thanks. I’ll give him a call,” I said as I stood up to leave. “Lily’s having a hard time with this. The guy said he isn’t leaving here without his son, and I can’t say that I blame him.”
“Let me know how things turn out.” I nodded and headed back upstairs to Lily. She was feeding JW, and she seemed to be putting on her best poker face as she smiled and talked to him. I was proud of her for pulling it together for the little guy.
“How’s Courtney?” Lily asked as I walked over to her. I put my hand under her chin lifting her lips up to meet mine.
I gave her a brief kiss before I answered, “Still no change. She’s in the ICU, and they aren’t letting anyone back there to see her. Bobby’s a wreck.”
“Bless his heart. I know this has to be hard on him,” she said lifting the spoonful of baby food up to JW’s mouth. He scrunched his nose and spit it right back out. That green slime looked pretty damn gross. Hell, I didn’t blame him for spitting it out.
“He doesn’t like that shit. You got anything else you can feed him?” I asked.
“You know he only likes applesauce and peaches. He has to eat his vegetables sometime,” Lily said.
“Give him what he likes.”
“Goliath….”
“Seriously babe, give him what he wants. He can eat his vegetables another day,” I told her. I knew she was right, but I wanted him to be happy. My stomach twisted into knots when I thought about Maverick being the one to feed him. I didn’t want that to happen any more than Lily did, but it was a real possibility. While he was still with us, he should have whatever he wanted.
“Okay,” Lily said as she tossed the jar of green peas in the trash.
She was searching in her bag for another jar of food when I said, “You need to call your dad.”
She looked up at me and questioned, “Why?”
“See what he knows about Maverick and Hailey. He lives in the same town with them. Maybe he knows something.”
Chapter 23
Lily
Dad picked up on the first ring, “Hey, honey. How ya doing?” he asked cheerfully.
“I’ve been better,” I told him.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
“Maverick showed up here today. It’s a long story, but he’s here, and he wants JW,” I said, my voice trembling.
“I’m sorry to hear that, sweetheart. I know you’ve gotten attached to the little guy.”
“I’m so confused. I just don’t know what to think. Do you know anything about this guy? He said that everything Hailey told us was a lie,” I asked.
“I was afraid of that,” he told me. I could hear the disappointment in his voice as he said, “Lily, your sister was in some trouble. She came here asking for money the week before she died.”
“Why would she come to you for money? She could have asked me,” I told him.
“She was pretty strung out, and she was trying to buy more drugs, Lily. It was pretty bad. You gotta know she was desperate if she had to ask me for money.”
“That can’t be right. She was checking into rehab! She was getting help!” I tried to explain, beginning to wonder if I knew my sister at all. Each new thing I found out was opening another hole in my heart.
“Lily, she was just like any other person that’s addicted to drugs. She’d say anything to get her next fix. She lied to everyone. She did a real number on Maverick and his club. She’s lucky they didn’t retaliate.”
“I can’t believe I fell for all of her lies. I believed in her. She was so convincing. Mom fell for them, too.”
“Lily, she was your sister. What else were you supposed to do?”
“I was supposed to know she was lying, Dad. I feel like such an idiot….”
“You can’t do that to yourself. She wasn’t the sister you knew and loved.”
“What about Maverick? Do you know anything about him?” I asked.
“He’s a pretty decent guy, Lily. Our clubs have done some business before. Just trying to live by the brotherhood and do what they can to get by. They aren’t perfect by any means. Hell, none of us are,” Dad explained.
“What should I do? He said he wants JW.”
“Lily, you have to go with your gut on this one. Maverick is his father. I think he deserves a chance to get to know his son, one way or another.” That wasn’t what I wanted to hear, but I knew he was right.
“This is just too hard. I don’t want to let him go, but I know it’s not right to keep him. If I let Maverick take him, will you keep an eye on him? Make sure JW’s okay?”
“You know I will. You can always come here and see for yourself, Lily. I’d love to have you here to get to know the woman you’ve become.”
“Thanks. I might just take you up on that.”
“Lily… I’m proud of you,” Dad said, his voice gruff. The tears instantly filled my eyes. I never realized how much I needed to hear those words, and it meant the world to me that he finally said them.
“Thank you, Daddy. Talk to you soon,” I told him as I hung up the phone. I felt Goliath’s arms wrap around my waist as he hugged me from behind. He didn’t have to say a word. Just having him close to me, helped me realize that I wasn’t alone and that eased some of the hurt. Everything I’d ever thought about my sister was a lie. She lied about everything - to me, to Mom. Damn. I needed to call Mom. I knew it didn’t make sense, but I was having a hard time not blaming her for some of it. As Hailey’s mother, she should’ve known something wasn’t right. Then, maybe we could’ve helped her. I hated even thinking about it. It was like losing Hailey all over again.
“We need to call Maverick. We need to figure this shit out,” Goliath said.
“I know. I can’t believe this is really happening. How am I supposed to let him go?” I asked.
“Legally, he has every right to be with his son, Lily. We have to hear him out. Let’s see what he’s got to say,” Goliath replied.
“Do you think he will still let me see him? I won’t be able to survive this if he tries to keep him from us.”
“I’m sure he won’t have a problem with us seeing him. I’ll make sure of it. I’m going to check with the doctor to see when they are going to release JW, and then I’ll call him.”
“Thank you. I couldn’t do this without you,” I told him.
He kissed me on the forehead and said, “You have me. We’re in this together, Lily. You’re it for me.” I watched him walk out of the room. My mind kept replaying his words. There was so much going on in my head. I was terrified at the idea of losing John Warren forever. I just prayed that Maverick would let Goliath and I continue to be a part of his life. Because all I really understood at that moment was that I was completely and totally in love with the giant of a man walking away from me.
Goliath arranged for Maverick to meet us at the house at 7. I ran down to check on Courtney one last time before we left. They’d moved her to a new room, so Bobby was finally able to see her. Tessa was right by his side, hovering over Courtney. I knew she was worried about her friend. I hated to see her worried like this, but the doctors told everyone that she was stable. They weren’t sure why she was still in the coma, but her vitals were good and they were hopeful. The guys worked out a plan to take turns coming back to the hospital to check on her. It was nice to see that these men really did take care of their own.
Maverick knocked on the door at exactly 7 o’clock. Goliath got up and opened the door letting him inside. “Can I grab you a beer?” Goliath asked before he sat down.
“That’d be great,” Maverick replied. He seemed a little nervous which surprised me. He was about to chang
e our lives forever, but he was the one that was nervous?
Goliath returned from the kitchen with three beers in his hand. I took mine and turned to Maverick. “Before we start, I just want to say, I love John Warren. When I left with him, I truly thought I was protecting him. I made a mistake in trusting Hailey.”
“You should have told me about him,” Maverick said with anger in his voice.
“Under the circumstances, I’d think you’d understand why she did what she did.” Goliath said firmly.
“It would have saved us all a lot of trouble if she’d just come to me first. She should’ve given me a chance, but I understand why she did it. I know how persuasive Hailey can be.”
“You’re right, Maverick. I should’ve given you a chance, but I truly thought I was doing the right thing. I loved Hailey, and I never thought she could do something like this. It breaks my heart that she’s done this to all of us. I really wish I would have done things differently,” I tried to explain.
“I was with Hailey for over two years. For a long time, she meant everything to me. I wanted to spend every minute I could with her. I even thought that I wanted to marry her, start a family with her. First she started taking pain meds for her migraines, then she started smoking pot. Over time, she just kept needing something stronger. In the end, she would risk anything for her next hit. Eventually, she chose drugs over me. Over my son.”
“I’m so sorry. I really am,” I told him. I knew it must’ve been hard on him, too. He obviously loved her, and she’d hurt him, time and time again.
“I’m not saying I’ll be the perfect father, but I’ll do whatever it takes to make him happy. No matter what.”
“Do you have people around that will help you? You know, taking care of a baby isn’t easy,” I tried to explain.
“I do, and I’m very aware that this won’t be easy.” Maverick replied.
“When exactly are you planning to head back home?” Goliath asked.
“My flight leaves first thing in the morning. I plan to take him back with me then.”
I felt the pressure building in my chest, and it was making it hard for me to breathe. It was really happening. He was taking him. I was losing him, and there wasn’t anything I could do to stop it.
“He stays here tonight,” Goliath demanded.
“I can live with that, but I’ll be by first thing in the morning to pick him up,” Maverick said as he stood to leave. He walked over to the sofa and knelt down on one knee in front of me. “I know this is hard for you. I can’t imagine how difficult it’s going to be for you to let him go, but this is something I gotta do. He’s my son. I have to try to do right by him.” He slowly stood and leaned over kissing my lightly on my temple. Tears were streaming down my face as I watched as he walked out the front door.
I wanted to hate him. I wanted to think of him as some kind of monster for taking John Warren away from me, but the truth is, I really liked him. I can see why Hailey fell for him, but it didn’t make it any easier. I got up and headed to John Warren’s room. He was asleep in his crib, his little broken arm resting above his head. He’s so precious when he’s sleeping. I wanted to commit every detail of his little face to my memory- his long eyelashes, little round checks, his little fingers, and the beautiful eyes. I lifted his tiny hand up to my mouth and placed a small kiss in the palm of his hand. I brushed the back of my fingers against his cheek loving the feel of his soft skin. My heart ached. I could feel it shattering to a million pieces as I watched him sleep.
Goliath’s warmth surrounded me as he walked up behind me wrapping his arms around my waist. He lightly kissed my shoulder and whispered, “Are you okay?”
“No,” I said turning around to face him. I rested my head in the center of his chest and began to cry. I was so tired of crying, but the tears just kept coming. Goliath leaned down and slipped his hands under my knees lifting me up into his arms. He carefully carried me to my room and laid me gently on the bed. He walked out without saying a word and headed across the hall only to return with John Warren still sleeping in his arms. He laid him in the middle of the bed before walking over to the other side of bed and lying down. We both turned facing John Warren.
He ran his fingers through my hair and whispered, “I’m sorry, Lily,” He sounded completely defeated. I knew he was having a hard time too. It was in his nature to fix things, but he couldn’t fix this. Fate had intervened, and there was nothing either us could do about it.
“This is going to be so hard. How am I supposed to just let him go?” I asked.
“You’ll do it because it’s the right thing to do. Maverick seems like a good guy. I think he’ll do right by JW. It’s going to be hard, but we’ll go see him whenever you want,” he said reassuring me.
“Promise?” I asked.
“Promise.”
Chapter 24
Goliath
It didn’t take long for Lily to drift off to sleep. She’d spent most of the day and night crying, and it’d taken its toll on her. I laid there staring at them both. It was hard to imagine what it would be like waking up there without JW in the house. I’d gotten pretty attached to him over the past few weeks, and it was going to be hard to see him go. I gave him a kiss on the head and carefully got out of the bed.
I went into his room and started packing his things. I knew it would be hard for Lily to sort through them, so I figured it might make it a little easier on her. I got everything loaded into JW’s bags and put them by the front door. I went into the kitchen and filled his diaper bag with the remaining baby food jars and formula. I wanted to make sure Maverick had everything he needed on their way back to Washington.
When I had everything packed, I crawled back into bed with them and tried to get some sleep.
With everything rolling around in my head, I didn’t figure I’d get much sleep, but I woke up to JW trying to crawl across my chest. He was smiling and obviously happy to find me laying there beside him.
“Hey, Little Man. You ready to get up?” I whispered.
Lily opened her eyes and panic spread across her face. “What time is it?” she asked.
“It’s about 6:30. He should be here soon.”
“I need to get his things ready! We need to change him and get him some breakfast!” she said frantically.
She was about to get out of bed, when I reached over and grabbed her arm. “You stay here with him. I already packed up all of his things and got the diaper bag together for Maverick. I’ll get his clothes and get his breakfast ready,” I told her.
“When did you do all that?” she asked.
“Last night,” I told her as I leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. “I’ll be right back.”
“Goliath….”
“Today is going to be hard for both of us, but we’ll get through this together, Lily.”
I grabbed a diaper and a change of clothes and took them over to Lily before I headed into the kitchen. By the time I had his food out on the table, Lily walked into the kitchen carrying JW on her hip. As soon as she fed him, Maverick knocked on the front door. A darkness instantly filled the room. Without saying a word, she got up and let him in bringing him into the kitchen.
Maverick walked over to JW and lifted him up out of the high chair. “You ready to go big guy?” he asked him.
“We packed a few things for him. Everything you need should be in the bags by the front door,” I told him.
“Thanks man. I appreciate that. Gonna need to get going. I’ll keep in touch. Lily….” He walked over to her and said, “I want you to know that you both can come see him anytime you like. I want you to be a part of his life.”
“Thank you for that, Maverick. I’ll try to come see him after Christmas if that’s okay?” Lily said weakly.
“Love to have you both anytime,” Maverick said as he started walking towards the front door. He was about to open the door when Lily cried, “Wait!” She rushed over to Maverick and took JW from his arms. She hugged him clo
se to her chest and gave him several kisses as she said, “I love you so much! I promise I’ll come see you soon. Promise.” She finally released her hold on him and gave him back to Maverick. “Please take good care of him.”
“I’ll do my best,” Maverick said.
It was excruciating watching him load JW’s belongings into the back of that cab. I wanted to stop him, to tell him to fuck off, but as much as I hated to admit it, I knew he deserved to be with his son. When the cab pulled off, Lily ran to her room and shut the door. I could hear her muffled cries, and a part of me wondered if she needed this time alone. I couldn’t stand to leave her like this, so I opened the door and walked over to the bed. She was curled up on her side crying. I laid down on the bed beside her and pulled her over to me. I held her as she cried herself to sleep. I knew there was no way I could sleep right, so I carefully slipped out of the bed being careful not to wake her.
After a few hours, she came out of her room and asked, “Can we go see Courtney? I need to get out of this house for a little while.” Her eyes were red and swollen from crying, but she’d fixed her hair and makeup. She was trying.
“I think that’s a good idea.”
It was getting too cold for my bike, so we had to take Lily’s car to the hospital. I really hated her damn car. It was too fucking small, but I didn’t have a choice. At least it was a short drive to the hospital. When we walked into the waiting room, Renegade and Taylor were sitting with Bulldog.
“Hey man. How did it go this morning?” Renegade asked.
“It was tough, but we got through it. It’s gonna be hard not having him around.” I’d called Bishop to let him know what was going on. Apparently he had shared the news with the guys. It was nice to know that my brothers were there for me when I needed them. I nodded down the hall towards Courtney’s room and asked, “How’s she doing?”
“No change. She’s stable, but still in a coma. They are calling in a specialist in the morning. They want to run some tests,” Renegade explained.