by Joe Zito
“I still don’t understand how I’m connected to your nightmares,” Susan said sounding puzzled.
“Well, you see Susan, after I left Indiana I put all of that night behind me. But one night in 1974, I think it was, it all came rushing back to me one night during one of the worst nightmares I’ve ever had. Your daughter Heather was in my nightmare and I don’t know why. And so was the girl with long black hair. And there was something else too……that thing. That beast was there too glowing its red eyes and there was so much blood and screaming……”
Eldon couldn’t go on. The memory was too much and the look on Susan’s face was one of absolute horror. How can he know about the Bludenhale Massacre? How does he know about Heather and Angel? What the hell is going on? Her mind was spinning.
“And now in the past two months you have been haunting my dreams every night. If there is something that you know Susan, please, tell me what it is.”
Eldon’s face was strained with agony almost as he pleaded for some kind of explanation.
All of this was frightening Susan. But why so scared Susan? Do you know something about the past? She finally took her eyes away from Eldon when she looked up at the picture of Heather once again. She stood up and walked over to the fire place mantel. She picked up the picture and stared deeply into it. She had no answers for Eldon and she sure didn’t have a clue as to why he was dreaming of her lost in the cornfield. She put the picture back and turned around facing the old and broken man. Her eyes were moist.
“I don’t have any answers for you. I’m sorry.” Maybe you do Susan or maybe not.
Eldon couldn’t help but think that Susan was keeping something from him. All throughout his story she had a look of terror on her face as if she too had come in contact with the devil from the corn with red, glowing eyes. Susan felt bad for Eldon. He looked so defeated and haggard. But that didn’t stop her from wanting to know more about him and to see if he really was for real or not. Then she had an idea.
“Eldon,” she said, her voice soothing like, “do you mind if we took a drive out to your old house. You said it wasn’t far from here.”
“I suppose we could if you have the time.”
“I got all the time in the world now.”
She wanted to see the place where he claims to have created the horrid atrocity in his tale. She just need something solid other that some dreams. It was all still very chilling to her that he would know of what happened in the garage from twenty two years ago. She herself didn’t know the exact details other than what detective Monroe had told her and Mark.
“How about I follow you out there,” she said.
He shook his head and smiled. “Are you ok?” He asked her. She forced a smile.
Susan grabbed her purse and as they walked out of the house and to their cars, she knew all along that she didn’t need confirmation of Eldon’s claims, stories and dreams.
It wasn’t me.
A light wind blew through Eldon’s white, thin hair as he looked up at the old barn. His bottom lip trembled at the sight.
“That was such a long time ago,” he said more to the wind than Susan who was standing next to him. She could tell this was difficult for him but she just needed to see it to believe it. Luckily the property was vacant. No one lived there. Eldon thought that was probably a good thing.
“You were just a little boy when you lived here?” Susan asked him.
“Yes. I was born and raised on this farm. I was twelve years old when the nightmare began.”
Susan decided not to ask any more questions. She gave him some time as he strolled slowly around the property, looking at the old house and barn and then the surroundings like one would at a museum.
It was a warm, sunny afternoon but the property seemed grey and dismal. Eldon didn’t know how long the house has been vacant, he wasn’t’ sure if he cared or not. He stopped and looked at the old house with his old eyes.
“I told myself I would never come back to this place and here I stand with all these dark memories.”
Susan crossed her arms as if to ward off a chill despite it being eighty three degrees. Eldon started towards the barn.
“It was right in there,” he said pointing at the monstrous, dilapidated structure.
Just then a noise came from the house. It startled Susan as she turned around quickly. Could it be a ghost in the house watching the goings on of the living or possibly an old witch?
“Look, right there,” Eldon said to Susan.
It was just a rat scurrying out of a broken window of the house. Eldon moved away from the barn. He had had enough of the trip down memory lane, standing there thinking about that stormy night the devil came alive in his father’s cornfield.
Susan decided maybe it would be ok to say something now. She offered, “I bet it must be hard coming back here, seeing all of this after so many years.”
Eldon shook his head in agreeance with Susan who was just a few feet away from him. She noticed his stare go from the edge of the cornfield to the house. She had no idea he was looking at a scared, twelve year old boy running for his life. He then turned his attention to the cornfield.
“I reckon that thing is deep in the corn by now.” He couldn’t imagine any sane farmer wanting to have a crop in this dreadful area. But he supposed that most farmers had never seen the likes of an eight foot scarecrow prowling around.
“Suppose we should be heading back,” Susan said. Eldon turned to her. He shook his head once more, agreeing with Susan that it was probably time to leave. He took another long look at the barn. Susan thought maybe he was thinking about going in there. She prayed that he didn’t.
After his long gaze he turned away from the old barn and began walking to his car.
“Susan, I am terribly sorry if I caused you some unwanted heartache today. I’m sure you don’t need or want any of this in your life.”
“No, I don’t, not at all. But everything has changed now. We have a connection Eldon, you and I. “
She smiled wanly at him when he offered his apology. She did genuinely like him. He was just an old soul searching for an answer.
As they stood looking at one another, the wind blew at their faces and Eldon couldn’t help but notice once again that look on Susan’s face like she wanted to tell him something or could possibly be keeping some vital information from him.
“Susan, are you sure there isn’t anything you want to talk about?”
Her face was a mask of confusion but she kindly told him that she was all right.
Then, Eldon said, “There is one more thing before I go. Susan, you said that the one who was responsible for you daughter’s death was convicted and sent away. This wouldn’t be the girl with long black hair would it?”
“Yes it was,” she answered softly with sadness in her voice.
Eldon continued, “The reason I’m asking you this is because as I told you before, the nightmare I had in 1974 had both your daughter and the girl with long black hair. She was one of the ones screaming in terror and I could feel her horror and the heartache when she saw…..” He suddenly stopped, realizing it wasn’t a good idea to say anymore.
“Well, I guess I better be on my way. Thank you for your time Mrs. Smith and again I am sorry.” He opened his car door and began to step in when suddenly Susan gently put her hand on his shoulder.
“Wait.”
What is it Susan? Is there something you would like to tell the old man? Something on your mind? Something from the past?
“I….I just wanted to say I’m sorry for the way I acted earlier. I understand you are experiencing something that is obviously very troubling and you thought by speaking with me that maybe you could find and answer. The truth is I don’t know why you are seeing me in your dreams. As far as what you and your father did a long time ago, well…..” She was at a loss for words. Eldon squeezed her hand and smiled warmly at her.
“I understand. It is a wild story but it is true Mrs. Smith.
”
He sat down into the driver’s seat. Susan reached inside her purse and pulled out a pen and an old receipt from Sam’s Hardware.
“Here, let me give you my number, if that’s ok.”
Eldon shook his head and told her thank you.
She asked, “Are you going to be in town for a few days?”
“I’m staying at the Roadside motel just outside of Bludenhale.”
“Ok, well, if you would like to call me, you can. It won’t be a problem.”
“All right then.”
He pulled away slowly and drove down the dirt driveway. Susan watched him with a thousand thoughts in her mind.
She felt numb and like she was in another world when she drove home. Am I in a dream, she thought. The lump in her throat was urging her to let out a cry but she couldn’t. And then she started thinking about everything Eldon had told her: his visions of her in his dreams, his knowledge of Heather and Angel and Heathers death, but most of all what he and his father did in that barn on a hot summer night in 1947.
By the time she reached her driveway she felt dizzy and sick. She stopped the car as fast as she could and opened the door and threw up in her driveway. She looked upwards and could see her house in a sideways view and in a heat haze in the distance. She wanted to run away from all of this. It was too much to bear and too unreal. What the fuck is going on, she thought as she wiped away a splotch of vomit from the side of her mouth. How can he know all those things?
Somehow she managed to drive up to her house. She stumbled inside and filled a glass full of water and drank it. She still felt dizzy and sick. She went upstairs and fell onto her bed and fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.
Hours later she awoke in the darkness. She knew she wasn’t dreaming. She felt scared all of a sudden by the dark but more so by being alone. She glanced at her clock and it was eleven thirty. Jesus, I slept that long? She didn’t even know what time it was when she fell asleep. She sat up in her bed, bringing her knees up to her chest. She could still taste some leftover vomit from earlier and then she remembered. A frightened chill went through her when she thought of the things Eldon had told her. In front of her was her dresser with a large, square mirror attached to it. She saw her reflection in the dark of the room. The air conditioner kicked on. Outside, crickets were chirping. A distant thunder boomed. A late night thunderstorm was on its way.
A wave of thoughts went through her mind. It can’t be. It just can’t be. What was once thought of as the deranged delusion of a mentally ill girl was now quite true. Susan knew the horrors in Angel Larson’s mind because Angel told her one night during one of Susan’s many visits with her.
As Susan stared at her reflection in the mirror in the darkness of her room, she thought of what the girl with long black hair had told her so long ago.
1980
December
Angel Larson sat staring blankly out the window in her room on the second floor of the Indiana State Mental Hospital. She had become depressed and lost the last little bit of life she had (and sanity for that matter) three months ago when she saw the news report on the death of Led Zeppelin drummer, John Bonham. Party’s over.
Led Zeppelin was her and Heather’s favorite band back when she had a normal life, living in a small Indiana town, before the bloodshed in a small garage by the mouth of a monster scarecrow.
Angel’s parents had abandoned her months after she came to the I.S.M.H. They just couldn’t accept her as their daughter anymore, knowing that she was a monster and the horrific murder she was accused of. But Angel knew the truth about that night. And she knew she didn’t imagine it, even though it all felt like a bad dream.
Something clicked inside of her one night and she decided to put that black memory out of her mind. Sex became her outlet and it was what she was best at even more than hair, makeup and going to beauty school. She was a bona fide sex junkie and even before she was sentenced to life at the crazy house. Masturbation was her vice and her release, her knight in shining fucking armor from the horrors of that night and her new life of being locked up. It helped ease the pain at least for a while. Of course she would occasionally think of Heather and her boyfriend Ron and have a nightmare every now and then, but for the most part, touching herself and sex had shielded her from the terror she had temporarily put aside in her mind. It worked and it got her through the first six years of her time at the I.S.M.H.
Until now.
Hearing the news reporter talk of John Bonham’s passing had re-opened the gate of terror that had been locked in her mind for six years. It affected her severely. It was almost like a part herself died when they said the mighty Zeppelin would not continue on. It they couldn’t go on, then she couldn’t go on either she supposed. And that’s when the nightmares came on full force.
She stopped her daily masturbation routine and now all of her thoughts of sex were replaced with the face of a monster with a metal trap mouth. She also started thinking of Heather more too. She had always been on her mind but now since the end of Zeppelin, she thought of Heather every day. Sometimes she wouldn’t leave her room for days. She would only cry and stare out the window. Sex no longer interested her; only blood and nightmares now. A fragile mind can only build a wall so high until the demons start to climb over.
One Friday night around 2 a.m. Angel sat up in her bed. She was soaked in own sweat and her mind was replaying the nightmare she just had of that thing in the garage on top of her, fucking her. She could feel its foot long cock, impaled with nails, being thrusted hard up inside her. A thunderstorm was roaring outside. On each flash of lightning she could see the fountaining gushes of blood jetting out of her abused vagina. It rained down on her, splattering her face and naked body. A high pitch scream flew out of her mouth in her dream. Strands of black hair clung to her sweaty face. An electric blue flash illuminated the beast on top of her. It roared and growled as it fucked her, making her bleed to death from in between her legs. A pair of glowing red eyes stared down at her as she lay beneath its girth.
And then she woke up.
As she tried getting a hold of herself, the rain coming down outside made her wonder if she was still dreaming or not. She lifted up her soaking wet silk night gown and realized it was just a dream. Her female parts were untouched and blood free. She cried for a while, sitting on her bed, listening to the rain and thinking of her dream. Finally she got up and went to use the toilet. She went back out to her bed and turned on the lamp on her nightstand. She thought of maybe writing in her diary but decided not to. When she first came to the I.S.M.H. in 1974 her doctor had suggested she write in a journal or diary. She thought it was a stupid idea. It wasn’t until 1976, two years later that she would decide to give it a try. It soon became her new best friend.
As she sat on her bed after having one of the worst nightmares yet in the year 1980, a thought went through her mind. It was the first time she ever thought about it. The terror she had been feeling since the breakup of Led Zeppelin she thought couldn’t be alleviated by writing in her diary, but rather by talking to someone. And she knew who this person was. She just hoped and prayed that Mrs. Smith wouldn’t think she is crazier that she already is and would never speak to her again.
Susan knew Angel had not been herself for the past few months and didn’t know why. The two women sat across from each other at the small round table on a cold and snowy day in December of 1980. Angel was now twenty eight and in the four years Susan had been coming to see her, she could clearly see that something was wrong.
“So, is there anything you want to talk about?
Susan took a drag off her cigarette. Angel sat with her legs up on the chair and her arms wrapped around them. She had dark circles under eyes and had a constant frown on her face as if she was eternally sorry.
“Ok, out with it Angel. What’s wrong? You haven’t seemed like yourself for a while now. Did they change your meds?”
Susan suddenly felt stupid for asking that
. She wasn’t sure if Angel was on medication or not.
Angel slowly shook her head but she didn’t seem offended. There was a long silence and then Angel began looking around the room as if to make sure no one else was with them. She said, “It wasn’t me.”
“What?” Susan said with a strained look of confusion.
“It wasn’t me.”
This time Angel said it almost in a whisper and like she was about to cry.
“It wasn’t you?” Susan said. “It wasn’t you what?”
“That night.”
Susan let out a sigh as if she was getting fed up with all this talk about nothing.
“Angel, honey, I don’t have the slightest clue as to what you are talking about.”
Silence.
In a low voice just above a whisper, Angel leaned in close to Susan and said, “There was something in the garage that night. It wasn’t me Mrs. Smith.”
Susan didn’t respond to what she just heard but rather stared at Angel with a ‘how dare you look’ on her face.
Oh my God, the poor girl really has lost it. You let your guard down Susan these past four years. She really is crazy.
But she knew better though. Girl couldn’t hurt a fly.
Susan wrestled with the idea of getting up and leaving but there was an honesty and sincerity in Angels voice that kept her planted in her seat.
Susan pursed her lips together in a sarcastic smirk. “Ok, tell me then. What did you see Angel?”