“Christ.” I walked over to him and pulled him into a hug. If nothing else, spending all of this time with Raven and Ashby taught me how to love them. Ashby needed a hug.
After a long five seconds, Ashby cleared his throat and pulled away. “Do you think she’ll be okay to do the show tonight?”
“If for no other reason than to spite all of us, yes.” I smirked, and he followed. “Is Willow going to stay on tour with us?” I’m not sure what answer I’d hoped for.
Ashby nodded, and I realized I’d been hoping for the opposite movement. “She will. We asked both girls to stay.We don’t want or expect them to suddenly behave like the family they are, but we can’t bear to have them at each other’s throats anymore.”
“Ash?” Raven knocked on the door to the shed. “We’re ready to do sound checks. Are you guys all right?”
Ashby looked at me hopefully, and I nodded. He called over my shoulder. “We’ll be right out, hun.” He redirect his words to me. “Let’s get through the shows tonight and tomorrow. Then we have a couple of days before the next one to hopefully sort through some things.”
I opened the door, motioning for Ashby to exit ahead of me. “Here goes nothing, huh?”
Thankfully, I was right about Ember’s ability to keep her stage life and off-stage life separate for the sake of the show. It was something I’d always been able to do. I found performing the best way to work through whatever was happening off stage. Luckily for all of us, and the audience, Ember and the rest of The Six did the same.
The last song before intermission had me nervous, and holding my breath. While the whole band was involved instrumentally, the vocal showcase belonged to Ember and her mom, while Ashby and I led the melody on our guitars.
Ember looked as poised as ever as she stood inches away from her mother, sharing a microphone as they sang:
Sing, baby, sing, baby, sing tonight
Sing for the good and sing for the bad,
oh sing for the life you thought you had
I took an anxious breath but Ember kept smiling. It may have been my imagination, but her vocals sounded better than they had in a long time.
Kiss me sweetly, one last time
Kiss me like we never lost our shine
Hold on tight, and tighter still
Breathe in the life we had together
The life we never will
Oh,
Sing, baby, sing, baby, sing tonight
Hold me, kiss me, love me
Through the night
Sunrise comes, shadows disappear
The only thing we’re left with, baby
Is our fear
I exhaled loudly as Ashby and I strummed the lengthy interlude, before the gorgeous mother-daughter team finished out the last song of this set.
Oh, fear is a hearty mistress, cutting no slack
Grab my hand, stop looking back
The moonlight is ours, the sunlight for us.
Baby, nothing comes between us
No matter the cost.
Once the song ended, and the crowd lifted us up with their applause, we announced our short break and headed to the shed.
“That was stunning, Ember.” I tugged her hand until her body was against mine, kissing her neck as I spoke.
She overrode my system every time she sang. I’d fallen in love with her on a stage, and every time we took one together. It felt like that first night all over again, only it was better. Now she was mine.
Ember squeezed my hand and backed away from my lips. “Come with me.”
She pulled me through the back door, where we were greeted by a large field and the canopy of every star in the universe hovering over us. The crowd hummed on the other side of the sage, but they seemed a million miles away as Ember led me down a small hill, sitting us in tall grass dotted with wildflowers.
I sat next to her and wrapped my arm around her shoulders, pulling her flush with me once again.
She lifted her face to me, allowing me to kiss her nose, making her smile as she spoke. “I’m sorry for this morning.”
I took my other arm and squeezed her tighter. “I’m the one who’s sorry. You have nothing to be sorry for. I was an asshole for losing my temper with you.”
Ember sat back, crossing her legs as she grabbed my hands, the intensity of her gaze grounding me. “No. I’m sorry for not telling you everything. You deserve more than my tantrum, Bo. We’re a fucking team. You remember that. Every day you tell me what you’re feeling, good and bad. No matter how much it hurts. You let me ask you about nightmares you have in the middle of the night, and you answer me even if its two thirty in the morning. You would never dream of brushing me off like I did to you today.”
“Ember, I’ve had years of therapy that’s allowed me to do that. It’s hard, but it’s the only way I can ever keep myself from shutting down completely.” I brushed a loose wave of hair away from her eyes, tucking it behind her ear.
She twisted her lips in apparent embarrassment. “I’m sorry for asking you to marry me.”
I laughed once, loudly. “You’re forgiven. Try not to let it happen again, K?”
“What?” she teased. “I can’t ask you to marry me? Women can propose, you know.”
I twiched my mouth into a grin. “Not to me, they can’t.”
“Are you some sort of a caveman?”
“I am.” I nodded definitively.
“Hmm, I’ll take it.” She turned her back, settling herself between my knees and leaning her head against my chest. “Seriously, though. I should have told you everything. In order. I’m not mad at you. I’m just … heartbroken.” Her voice cut off at the end of her sentence, and the tightening of her shoulders cued me into the tears that were undoubtedly rolling down her face.
I swept her hair over one shoulder, allowing me access to her tear-soaked cheeks, where I kissed some of them away. “It’s okay to be hurting. Your dad kind of filled me in when we got here. Not the gory details, but about their … open relationship with Michael and Solstice.” I held my breath, unsure if my words would push her too hard.
“I don’t even know what I’m most upset about. Not knowing I had a sister this whole time, or that I have one at all.”
“Well,” I offered, “you and Willow were close when you were younger, right?”
She nodded. “We were. And last year, when you and I got here, Willow and I were as close as we’d always been. It hurt like hell when she came on to you, Bo. It came out of nowhere. She had a reputation, but it had never affected me or my relationship with her. We were like sisters. Turns out, we are actually sisters, and she was taking it out on me.”
“Did she know your dad was also her dad?”
“I think she knew. It’s pretty fucking obvious now, isn’t it? It’s like she was punishing me for being the one who got to keep my dad, or something. Even though it feels like the exact opposite …” She trailed off and took a deep breath, exhaling as her shoulders sank.
“You feel like you lost him?”
“I feel like I don’t know him at all, Bo. I mean, sure, I knew that he and my mom weren’t married. But, I thought they were one of those special couples that stayed together because they chose each other, over and over again every day because they wanted to and not because there were legal documents that demanded their togetherness.”
“Your dad said—”
Ember sat forward and put her hand up, waving it around. “I’m not ready for what he said, okay? I just need to talk about how I’m feeling. My gut reactions.” She turned and looked at me with a determination I was glad to see.
I nodded, smiling that she and I appeared to be on even ground again. “Talk away, love. I’ll listen to every word you say.”
Ember turned and smiled. “I like that you call me love. Do that always.”
“Always,” I whispered.
She leaned forward, pressing my back against the grass as she kissed the hell out of me. I moaned louder than I’d intend
ed to, given we weren’t exactly anywhere private, but it felt so good to be home on her lips again. I hadn’t kissed her since we woke up, and that was far too damn long to have my mouth away from hers.
She pulled away with a smug grin on her face. “Get your act together, rockstar. We have another set. First act is me, you, and Regan.”
I groaned, playfully biting her shoulder as I sat up. “You expect me to be alone on stage with you with that kiss in my head?”
“Think of it as motivation. For tonight.”
“Tonight?” I stood and held out my hand, helping her to her feet.
“We’re getting a hotel room. You think I’m going to sleep in an RV with either my parents or Willow?”
I placed my hands on her backside, pulling her close to my body. “Not if we’re going to do what I plan to do with you.” I whispered into her ear, grinning as I felt goosebumps against my lips.
“Bo Cavanaugh,” she whispered back, “are you teasing me?”
I bit my lip, tilting my head to the side. “No. Promising.”
“Guys!” A slightly frantic sounding Regan hollered out the back door. “Let’s goooo!”
“Tonight,” I promised, grinning at her before acknowledging Regan.
“Tonight.”
Regan introduced us, and we took our stools, Ember and I slinging our guitars over our shoulders as we smiled to one another. Whistles and claps came from the crowd.
“Kiss her!” someone shouted from the front row.
Without hesitation, I flicked on my mic and answered, “You don’t have to ask me twice.”
Reaching out my hand, I slipped it around the back of Ember’s neck and pulled her to me, the crowd growing louder in their hoots and hollers.
Ember bit her lip and arched her eyebrow as she pulled away. “Ready?”
I answered with the strum of my guitar, and she fell into step a measure later. Performing looked good on her. Her cheeks glowed, her eyes brightened, and even her hair seemed to bounce more as she shook her head with the beat. She was surrendering herself to the music, and it was even a sexier sight than when she was under me in our bed.
Just as I thought that was an exaggeration—because when she was naked I could barely separate reason from fantasy—she opened her mouth and reminded me of the exact moment I fell in love with her. When I first heard her voice.
“Lost … and found
We’re taking the long way,
Oh, the long way around …”
She was singing a song that she, Regan and I had reworked from The Six’s first album. As with most of their early work, there was a lot of male/female back and forth. I had to keep count as I played, because getting lost in her voice was as easy as falling in love with her had been and I constantly risked missing my entrance. I hoped that would never go away.
Lifting my eyes from her mouth up to Regan, who helped count me in, I saw a tender smile on his face. I knew how much he missed having Georgia around, especially since they were fairly early in their relationship, but his undying support for my relationship with Ember was reassuring. He was the best friend I’d had in many years.
On his nod, I entered the song, silently grateful he was diligent in counting. The feeling I had when my voice joined Ember’s surged through my body like electricity, causing me to smile as we sang. As our melodies joined in holy matrimony I longed for our souls to.
Watching her head lower as she worked over a difficult combination on her guitar, and nailing it, I was once again firm in my resolve that she would be my wife. And I would spend the rest of my life working my ass off to be the husband she deserved.
***
“I hope Regan doesn’t hate us for bailing on him.” I discarded my backpack on the floor next to our bed in the small inn a few miles from the concert site.
Ember slid her sandals under the desk and slowly lifted her shirt. “Are we really going to talk about Regan? He’s a big boy. He’ll be fine.”
“Regan who?” I ran my tongue across my bottom lip as I walked toward Ember, stopping her hands as they reached the waistband of her skirt.
“Are you stopping me from being without clothes? That seems … counterproductive.”
She followed my eyes and let out a small groan as I knelt down in front of her, and she ran her slender fingers through my hair. Once I was on my knees, I guided the navy floor-length skirt over her hips, slowly brushing my fingers along the curve of her outer thigh and over the slight muscle in her calf.
“How is your skin always this soft?” I whispered as I brought my lips to her knee, trailing kisses down to her ankle where I let the skirt crumple to the floor.
Ember stepped backward and away from the skirt, standing before me in nothing but flushed cheeks and a nude lace thong. Her hair fell to just below her breasts, and she stood still, never breaking my stare.
Sitting back on my heels, I spoke again. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” My breath was fast and shallow as all of my clothes suddenly seemed ill-fitting.
Taking two steps forward, Ember held her hand out to me. As I stood, she spoke in the husky whisper I’d come to associate with the warmth of my tongue against her skin. “I need you, Bo. Make love to me.”
I lowered my head as she lifted slightly on her toes, clutching the fabric of my shirt as she pressed her swollen lips into mine. She lifted my shirt over my head, returning her lips to my collarbone, and worked her way slowly across my chest.
Unbuttoning my shorts as quickly as I could, I cast them to the floor along with my boxer briefs.
“Now you have too much clothing on,” I murmured against her skin as I ran my thumb along the elastic of her thong.
Like a dance, Ember took one step back toward the bed and I answered with one step forward. As she sat, I pulled her thong the rest of the way off. She responded by tossing her hair back over her shoulders, allowing me full access to her hardened nipples.
“Kiss me. Here.” She skimmed her fingers across her breasts as she scooted up the bed, laying back and pulling me on top of her.
I started at her neck, enjoying the restless squirming of her hips as my lips journeyed to their destination. As my tongue encircled the first nipple, Ember cried out and arched her back.
“God, Bo … I need you inside me.” She pressed the pads of her fingers into my shoulders, highlighting her urgency.
As I ran a hand up her inner thigh, connecting with the warm center of her desire, I felt the intensity of her need and couldn’t even pretend to hold back. Pushing her knees far enough apart to let me square myself between them, I paused for a moment, hovering over her as her hips continued their desperate movements.
Arresting her eyes in my gaze, I spoke softly but firmly. “November … I will never ever hurt you.”
Tears streamed from the corners of her eyes as she grabbed my hips and led me into her, throwing her head back as I filled her. As her tight space squeezed around me before relaxing and allowing me full access, I gritted my teeth, losing myself in the feeling.
I pulled out slowly and immediately pushed in. Harder this time. Needing to feel the pressure of her body around me.
“Shit,” I hissed as Ember drew her knees back, letting me fall deeper into her as she gripped the backs of my legs.
“Go slow. Just for a minute.” Her eyes opened and locked with mine, and I couldn’t look away. I couldn’t close my eyes.
I slowed down, pulling out slowly once more, and entering her just as slow, watching her eyes widen just slightly each time I entered her.
My heart raced and I felt lightheaded. “I can’t go slow anymore,” I pleaded.
“What do you want?” she whispered, running her hand along the outside of my face.
“I want to make you come.” I tried to slow my breathing by inhaling through my nose, trying not to lose it in that moment.
Ember lifted her head, setting her lips just to the side of my ear, and whispered, “Take what you want.”
As her head fell back to the pillow, I clenched my hands around the sheets and worked faster and harder, moaning as she screamed my name.
“God, Ember … I can’t hold on much longer.” My voice was a barely recognizable growl.
She cried out again as she released her hands from my back and found my hands on the bed, locking her fingers with mine. “Come with me, Bo. Now.”
The second I felt the swell of her orgasm crash around me, I let go. Pulsing deeply as we both called to each other from the depths of our ecstasy. Once our breathing slowed, I grabbed her chin, moving her face so she’d look at me.
“Never,” I repeated my promise from earlier. “Do you hear me? I’m never, ever going to make you feel one ounce of sorrow.”
With a quivering chin, Ember nodded, tears rising through her tired green eyes. “I trust you.”
Slowly I slid out of her, rolling to my side and pulling her still-warm body against my chest. Nuzzling through her hair, my lips found her neck. She responded by pressing her back even tighter against my body.
“Bo?” she asked in the smallest voice I’d heard from her in a long time.
“Yes, love?”
“Hold me until I fall asleep.”
I sighed, wanting more than anything to take away the raw pain that sat in her heart. “I’ll hold you while you sleep. Always.”
I kissed her temple once, and rested my head against the pillow, listening to the lush sound of her breath slow and even out until she was asleep. Planting my lips on her shoulder, I allowed sleep to take me, too. Praying that when we woke, her pain would miraculously be gone.
No miracles were granted the next morning. While Ember’s nerves no longer seemed exposed, the pain was still there. Forced under the surface of her manufactured smile as we ate breakfast with the band and prepared for the afternoon show. No one tried to talk to her about anything other than the music, and, for those few hours, I was grateful.
Marrying Ember Page 5