by Anna Martin
“You made a bet, on my body, to win a car?” Jared hoped he didn’t sound like too much of a pussy. Adam’s face was ice, not twitching, not moving, no emotion. “You are one twisted fucking son of a bitch,” Jared spat.
He was buzzed on the weed and vodka, and sick enough to know there was no choice but to run. With his classmates and the people he’d thought were friends at his back, Jared forced himself to walk slowly back to his truck. He opened the door, fired up the engine, and as he pulled away, the music in the house started to blast again.
With one look in the rearview mirror as he pulled onto the drive that led back to the main road, Jared saw Adam framed in the doorway of the white mansion, backlit like a rock star. Even from this distance, Jared could tell he wasn’t crying, wasn’t thinking, wasn’t feeling anything.
Why he’d expected anything different, he had no idea.
Chapter 12
The worst thing, the very worst thing, was that all Jared wanted to do was go to the one place he felt safe with the one person he actually liked being around and block out the rest of the world for a few hours.
Time alone with Adam in Adam’s bed.
Jared pulled over to the side of the road and threw up compulsively in a gutter until his throat burned and his stomach was empty of vodka, bile, and any residual love. Once purged, he felt marginally better and got back into his truck.
The only place for him to go was home, the home that Hadley had tried to make his too. She was out of town again, this time at a “conference” that was being held, strangely enough, in LA. Jared sent up a silent prayer of thanks that tonight, at least, he didn’t have to speak to anyone or answer awkward questions. He could go back to the big, empty, echoing house and lock himself away.
Inside, the air smelled slightly stale, evidence people didn’t really live here. The house was a political pawn for Hadley and a stopover place for Jared. Neither of them loved it or cared for it, or had made any effort to personalize the space. It just was.
His footsteps echoed on the stairs as he climbed them, already unbuttoning his pants and shirt, ready to get out of these fucking white clothes as soon as he was able.
Jared went to his bathroom and turned the shower on as hot as it would go, kicking his clothes off, then climbing into the steaming water. He didn’t even want to cry. The sickness wasn’t quite gone yet, and his whole body felt strangely fragile and delicate in a way he wasn’t used to.
Adam didn’t want to be with Jared. He wanted to fuck him to get the car that money couldn’t buy. Jared would probably have let him.
Oh, not right away. Maybe not until the New Year or spring. But with the way things had been progressing, the sexual tension building layer on layer and Adam’s seemingly endless patience, eventually Jared would have given in.
He’d never prized his virginity. Not really. It wasn’t something he’d held onto for religious or cultural reasons, or because something traumatic had happened in his past. He’d figured if he was ever going to share that with someone, to be that intimate with another person, they’d have to be pretty fucking special. And, Jared figured, he wasn’t likely to find that person at eighteen years old. Or nineteen. Maybe not for a long time.
When he was finally warmed through again, he turned off the water and quickly dried himself, leaving the abandoned clothes on the bathroom floor as he walked naked back to his room. There, he pulled on pajama pants, a long sleeved T-shirt, and a sweatshirt, huddling under it all for comfort.
He thanked God they had never done anything here. This bed was pure, untouched somehow, and safe to be in. Snuggling under the comforter, Jared pressed his eyes closed and tried hard to sleep.
He couldn’t, of course.
Humiliation was a hot twist in his chest. Everything he’d known about this place was a lie, or a truth told on top of a lie, making the truth dubious and uncertain. None of these people were real, all the things he’d learned about them a careful facade.
Leaving wasn’t an option, not really. He didn’t have a home to go to. Jared’s mother wouldn’t welcome him, not after all these years he’d lived apart from her. There was no way he’d go back to his dad. His sisters were at college; they didn’t want him under their feet. It was this or nothing.
Tap.
Jared assumed the noise was the start of rain. It rained almost constantly here, after all.
Tap tap.
He sat up in bed.
Tap. Tap tap.
Someone was throwing fucking rocks at his window. He was pretty sure no one had done that since 1993. Without checking who was behind it, Jared ducked down out of sight of the window and into the bathroom, fumbling in his pocket for his phone.
Fourteen missed calls from Adam. Two from Ryder. One from Mia. Three from unknown numbers.
Jared had a good idea who was outside.
Back in his bedroom, he walked over to the sash window and threw it up, leaning on the sill.
“What the fuck?” he said to the dark figure hidden at the edge of the tree line.
“Jared?”
“Yes, it’s fucking Jared. What are you doing, you psychopath?”
“You didn’t answer your phone,” Adam said, stepping forward into the moonlight.
“Maybe that was because I didn’t want to talk to you.”
“Come home with me.” There was a pleading note to Adam’s voice. “I need to talk to you.”
“Did you call off the bet?”
Silence.
“Fuck this,” Jared said and reached up to pull the window closed.
“Jared, seriously. Please.”
It was the first time Adam had ever said “please” in Jared’s presence. The word made Jared stop short. He still closed the window, but pulled on thick socks and his Timberland boots, and grabbed his phone and keys, stashing them in the pocket of his hoodie before heading downstairs.
Adam sat in his car, engine running, looking at Jared as though the world was about to end. Wondering what on earth he was doing, Jared got in, shut the door, and yanked his seatbelt on as Adam pulled away.
Adam’s bed.
They were both still dressed, Adam in the white designer clothes and Jared in his pajamas, lying side by side, not touching. Adam had barely said two words as he’d navigated the dark streets between Jared’s place and his own, watching the road carefully. He was likely still drunk, and even though he’d pay off any cop who dared to give him a DUI, it was easier to avoid those situations altogether rather than risking it.
Jared had kicked off the Tims before lying down, and it was warm in the room, warm enough for him to want to strip out of the sweater, too. With a start, Jared sat up, pulled the sweater off over his head, tugged his T-shirt down, and lay back. The movement seemed to spark something in Adam, who turned to look at him.
“I never meant for this to happen.”
“That’s a fucking stupid thing to say,” Jared said. “Of course you did. You set it up.”
“No,” Adam said softly. “I don’t mean the bet.”
“What, then?”
“I never meant to feel something for you.”
Jared sighed and turned his head, facing the ceiling rather than Adam’s intense eyes. “Like fuck you do.”
Adam made a sharp sound in the back of his throat. “I’ve never said that to anyone before,” he said, sounding annoyed. “Never in my whole life.”
“So what now?” Jared asked. “We pick up where we left off? Become the New Harbor power couple?”
“I don’t know,” Adam admitted. “I don’t know. I need tonight, Jared. Let me have that first.”
It took a few moments for Jared to process that. These sheets were soft under his fingertips, the expensive Egyptian cotton silky smooth. It was strangely comforting to be back here. The humiliation, anger, and rejection burned low in his stomach, not the sharp pain of earlier in the evening, but still there. Still throbbing away.
On impulse, Jared rolled onto his side to face Adam, cupped his face
in his hand, and lowered himself into a slow, sure kiss. It took Adam less than a second to wrap himself in Jared’s embrace, returning the kiss hungrily and nuzzling into Jared’s lips. They pushed each other gently back and forth, exchanging hungry kisses.
Jared stole under the hem of Adam’s expensive sweater, seeking out the warm, slightly sweaty flesh beneath. Adam’s stomach was toned and tight, a light dusting of hair leading down to the waistband of his pants. Jared pushed the sweater up, up, up until they had to break apart for Adam to pull it off completely.
From there, Jared took things to a level they hadn’t gotten to before. Sure, they’d made out with fewer clothes on than this, but not with the same intent of going somewhere. This was leading to a thing that had remained elusive so far.
Adam’s skin tasted of sweat, the bitter tang of cologne, and a heady spice that was all male sweetness. Licking over hard collarbones, the thick, tight muscle of his neck, to tight, puckered nipples, Jared applied himself to the task of learning this body. He wanted to know what made Adam gasp and moan, where it felt good, what temperature the skin was when he rubbed his cheek over it.
“Jared,” Adam said, and then they were struggling out of the rest of their clothes. T-shirts, pants, socks all went flying in one direction or another until Jared found himself pinned to the bed under Adam’s body, wearing nothing more than his boxers.
They were both breathing hard, faces only inches apart as Adam’s strong biceps strained. Not that Jared was struggling. Adam ran his hands down Jared’s arms, gently gripped his wrists, then maneuvered those wrists over Jared’s head, pinning them there.
Then he lowered his lips and took them into new territory.
By some unspoken agreement, cocks had stayed out of their nighttime fumbling so far. Bare chests and kissing was one thing, touching each other below the belt was another. It almost felt like intruding on a really good, really solid friendship.
Now Jared knew the truth, knew what was behind Adam’s advances, he was less worried about ruining their friendship. He rocked his hips up experimentally as they deepened the kiss, finding his cock rubbed against Adam’s nicely. Despite being the taller of the two, Jared’s height came from his long legs, and their lips, chests, bellies, and groins lined up neatly when they were lying on top of each other.
Jared pulled back from the kiss and grinned up at Adam. The rain started then, a slow, familiar drum against the glass. Adam blinked slowly, returned the shy smile, and ducked back into the kiss. Kissing was safe. They knew this.
Sensing Adam’s reluctance, Jared drew his knees up and wrapped his legs around Adam’s waist, using his strong thigh muscles to draw him down. Adam grunted softly and licked Jared’s neck, nibbled down to take Jared’s nipple between his teeth. While Adam teased and pulled on it, Jared rocked their hips together, imitating a thrusting motion.
Fucking. That was where this was headed.
Without breaking contact between them, Jared reached down and tugged at the waistband of Adam’s black Calvins, using his feet and the flexibility in his hips to push them down Adam’s toned thighs.
“What are you—” Adam started, but Jared silenced him with a hand wrapped around the back of his neck and a deep, searching kiss.
Using the same dexterity, Jared rid himself of his underwear, and then they were in totally new territory. Naked. Smooth. Hard. Ready.
Adam pulled away, panting and blinking and searching Jared’s face for something—answers, maybe. Looking up into soft gray eyes, sparkling like silver in the dark, Jared knew he was going to do this. He just had to convince Adam first.
Reaching between them, Jared wrapped his hand around both their hard cocks, stroking them awkwardly. It was enough friction to make Adam moan, and after a moment Jared stopped caring that it was clumsy and not that great. It was them, so it was good.
“Jared,” Adam said, his voice warm and husky. He licked his lips, then ducked his head and drew them into another soft, slow, begging sort of kiss.
They didn’t discuss what was about to happen next. It wasn’t necessary, not really. They both knew how it worked.
Adam reached into the drawer in his nightstand and came back with a bottle of lube and a gold-wrapped condom. Jared nodded, not knowing the words, but wanting Adam to know it was all right.
The lid on the lube snicked open, and Jared gently drew it out of Adam’s hand, taking it and using the slippery liquid on his hole. He closed his eyes, dropped his head back as he reached between his splayed thighs and ran his fingertip, just his fingertip at first, over that puckered entrance. This gentle exploration felt good, caused nerve endings all over that area to hum and sing to him as flickers of pleasure grew into flames that curled into his balls and heated his cock.
“Does it feel good?” Adam asked, his voice a low murmur, blending into the sound of the rain.
“Mm.”
“Can I help?”
Jared didn’t have words for that, so nodded instead. Adam used a little more of the slick lube and rubbed the hole along with Jared, sharing the task. It was Adam who nudged a finger inside first, testing how tight the ring of muscle was, how willing it might be to yield.
“Okay?” Adam asked. Jared nodded again, willing to let Adam take control of this task now. He dropped one arm over his eyes, blocking out even the watery moonlight as one of Adam’s fingers pushed in all the way to the hilt.
Rather than moaning or making any noise, Jared shuddered deeply. He knew all about the secret hotspot that was hidden deep inside him, the fabled source of pleasure he had teased and stroked and petted in other men.
Please. Touch me there.
He didn’t dare say the words aloud, and he hissed in discomfort as Adam pressed a second finger in alongside the first. It was a stinging stretch, then it faded, and Adam hooked his fingers in just the right spot, and
Oh.
They hadn’t been exaggerating. It was a starburst of arousal that centered right where Jared wanted it—ass, balls, cock, in that order, setting the fire burning again in an entirely new way.
As Jared forced himself to concentrate on what Adam was doing—knuckles twisting, fingers scissoring—the unavoidable truth was he was being prepped for being fucked for the first time. Maybe the only time if this didn’t go well.
He focused on those deft, clever fingers and found he was able to force himself to relax some. He had a tiny amount of control left, and Jared was determined to cling to that. He wasn’t going to be the passive partner, not now, not after all they’d been through.
“Now,” Jared murmured. “Do it now.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. Yes.”
He almost said please but was too proud to beg. Not when he didn’t need to, not really. Adam was more than willing to do it.
The clever, twisting fingers were drawn from Jared’s body, and Adam grabbed the bottle of lube once again, pouring some on his cock, more over Jared’s entrance. It was throbbing a little already from the teasing, and he bit his bottom lip, not sure if he was ready for what came next.
“Look at me,” Adam said softly.
They shifted on the bed, and Jared resumed his position from earlier, legs wrapped securely around Adam’s waist. His arms found a natural resting place over the curve of Adam’s biceps and his cock lay thick and waiting along the sharp angle of his hipbone. Jared didn’t want to touch it just yet.
Fear and arousal licked through him in equal quantities as Adam lined his cock up, then leaned down to steal a kiss as he pressed the head against the loosened entrance.
Jared gasped, then forced himself to hold his breath, not wanting to give anything away.
“It’s okay,” Adam murmured. “Relax, baby. Breathe deep.”
The term of affection was weird. They didn’t use those at all, but Jared found it working. He did relax, did take a deep breath.
“That’s it. Let it go.”
As he exhaled, Jared trembled lightly as Adam took advantag
e and pushed hard, harder, until the head of his cock popped inside.
“Holy shit,” Jared grunted as the expected pain flared.
But Adam was shushing him and kissing his neck, already soothing and comforting Jared as he held his body perfectly still. The pain started to fade, and Jared turned his head for another kiss that was right there waiting for him.
“I’ve got you,” Adam whispered. “It’s okay. Relax for me. Deep breath now.”
These words of comfort weren’t expected, nor was the tenderness and gentle sweetness of Adam’s kisses when they came, and the way Jared seemed to have ended up cradled in Adam’s arms. None of this was happening how he’d expected it to, and the flickering pleasure that had been all but forgotten a moment ago reared again, wanting to make its presence known.
He reached down for his cock, unashamed of this need, and Adam made space for Jared’s hand between them, holding himself up on his arms. Jared’s cock wasn’t fully hard again yet after the initial twisting pain of penetration, although with some tender ministrations and the knowledge of his own body, Jared was able to get himself there.
Adam wasn’t thrusting. That was better somehow. Instead he held himself all the way inside, and rocked their hips back and forth. Jared’s hole, not used to being stretched to this dimension, wasn’t forced to bear the indignity of a thorough pounding. Not the first time, anyway.
The head of Adam’s cock lined up with Jared’s prostate and oh fuck, was that making things feel good. He whimpered, then cut off the sound with a cough.
Adam kissed up his neck, reassuring with soft lips and tender bites that drew out the pleasure, taking it away from his lower half and spreading it throughout his body. While Jared’s hand moved up and down his cock with a familiar whoosh of skin on skin, Adam started to move in and out, in and out, the tiniest increment at a time.
There was no hiding any more. Jared felt like he’d been stripped bare, inside and out, and Adam could see all the way inside. No secrets now, just the new pleasure of this act, being fucked, being the passive partner for the first time in his life.