The phone on my desk rings. I take a deep breath and square myself. Time to reapply and climb back to the top. I’ll need to prove myself to Nikko, again, and kick that weaselly Brian in the balls, all at the same time.
After the conference call, I pace my office carpet. I’ve sent three texts to Heather this afternoon and none of them have been returned. Has she reviewed the lower offer with her bosses and wondered what’s going on?
I have a distinct feeling she’s going to cancel on me last minute again tonight.
If she does, I’ll be showing up at her apartment. There is no way we’re not talking things out.
By eight o’clock I’m sitting on the couch with my cell in my hand, waiting for her to call. It’s official. I’m hard up for a girl. Me, the rat bastard who used to buy a woman a diamond bracelet when I was about to dump her so she’d have something to soothe her anger.
Now it occurs to me, it isn’t about their damaged pride so much as their broken heart. How could I have known when I never felt the same way about them? This empty feeling in my chest scares the crap out of me.
Is it possible to love someone you’ve only known a little over a week? Is this just a strong case of lust and I’m acting like an idiot? How are you supposed to know the difference?
My phone rings and I jump. I deliberately do not answer until the second ring so I don’t look like I’m sitting here waiting for her to call. Freakin’ pathetic.
“Hey, Tony. It’s me.”
“Hey.”
“I’m still at the office and probably will be for another hour or so.”
My heart sinks to my stomach. Just like I thought. I knew she’d cancel. I force a lightness into my voice I’m not feeling. “Yeah, I understand.” Part of me is waiting for the other shoe to drop—for her to call me out on the lower deal. “What about tomorrow night? You don’t plan on working late on Friday, do you?”
“I’m sorry. I already made plans with friends.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Oh, dear. This looks bad doesn’t it?” I don’t answer, afraid if I do I will sound like a sullen brat. “It’s the timing, Tony, I swear. This buyout has created more work than any of us bargained for. We’re all working late nights.”
I nod, then remember she can’t see it and grunt a response. For some reason, she’s pulling away from me. The non-returned texts prove it. Something is up and I aim to find out what.
We end the call after I suggest taking her to my building this weekend. She agreed, even sounded enthusiastic about the idea, but a part of me worries about that eagerness.
Holy crap. Is she going to dump me on Saturday? I thought we really connected Tuesday night, but maybe it was all in my head.
I glance at the clock. In an hour, I’m heading over to her place uninvited. I won’t be pushed off and shunted into the corner. I’ve waited too long to find someone like her and I won’t give up easily.
The doorman remembers me and lets me in without calling up. That’s a relief, I was afraid she might say no if given the chance. In a few minutes, I’m standing before her door.
I knock on the door, feeling sweat trickle down my back. Heather opens it, still dressed for work in a dark shirt and blouse, but barefoot and looking tired.
Delight lights her eyes when she sees me. “Tony! What a nice surprise.” Her smile warms and she extends a hand to me. “I’ve missed you.”
Relief pours through me as I step inside and gather her into my arms. Her soft curves mold to my body. I take a deep breath and smell her ginger citrus bodywash. “Me too.” I plant a soft kiss on her neck, then pull back and stare deep into her eyes. “What happened to us seeing each other in private during the merger?”
She blushes and looks away. “I’m sorry. Lots of things have come up that I hadn’t expected. It’s kind of thrown me for a loop.”
I lean in, touching my mouth to hers, reassuring myself that things are okay between us. “Let’s not talk about work, okay?”
Stiffness leaks out of her and she nods. “Sounds good to me.”
While I’d like nothing more than to blurt out my feelings for her and wring a declaration from her, I know the timing isn’t right. Instead, I let my body do the talking as I sweep her into my arms and carry her to the bedroom.
“You’re not too tired for some fun, are you? I know the perfect thing for stress.”
Her dark eyes widen and her mouth forms a surprised O. I lay her down on the covers and proceed to kiss her senseless, determined to show her exactly how I feel.
Chapter Fifteen
Heather
“Let me get this straight,” Carla says between bites. “He comes over for a late night booty call and then what? Did he stay or take off afterwards?”
I grimace at Carla’s poor choice of wording, annoyed dinner at my place has become a question and answer session. Tony’s visit wasn’t that late and our experience wasn’t a “booty call,” as far as I could tell. His physical actions held an almost desperate edge to them, like he was proving something to himself, or to me. I can’t be sure which.
“It wasn’t like that,” I say. She picks at her Chinese food, nodding. “And yes, he stayed the night.”
“Ooooo…now we’re talking!” She shoves her chopsticks into the takeout container and pushes it away. “Guys only spend the night if they really care.”
“Uh-huh,” I respond, not wanting to read too far into Tony’s behavior. I don’t know what he was like with his other girlfriends. “Or they’re tired and don’t want to get up.”
“Puh-lease. A player like Tony doesn’t stay unless he has good reason.”
A lump forms in my throat and I push my own food container away, no longer hungry. “He really is a player, isn’t he?” My eyes tear up. “I tried to convince myself maybe this was something more, but I keep coming back to the fact that he has a history with a lot of women. And I may be nothing more than another in a long line.”
Carla comes around the table to hug me. “Whoa, now.” Her arms close tightly on my shoulders and I hold back from bawling over her kindness. “No tears. This is a ladies night out and we’re going to have fun.” She runs a hand down my hair and smiles. “I think you mean more to him than all the others.”
“Really?” The glimmer of hope in my voice sounds wimpy. “What makes you say that?”
“What’s gotten into you lately? First you’re all bossy and take control with him, then you get a new hairstyle and start dressing sexy…And now, you’re back-tracking to the self-doubting hen you were before you met him.”
I raise my shoulders once and let them drop, not sure where to begin. The work opportunities opening up the past few days have made me rethink everything about myself, and what I want. A position on the board would be beyond anything I’ve ever dreamed of obtaining.
Carla looks me over and bluntly asks, “Are you expecting your period soon? Could that account for this sudden moodiness?”
I laugh. “Hardly. It’s another two weeks off. I’ve had a lot going on at work.”
“Like what?”
I proceed to fill her in on what’s happened, tactfully leaving out the interlude in Tony’s office. Her mouth drops open when I’m done.
“Holy cannoli. No wonder you’re tied in knots. Do you think this merger thing could put an end to you both? What will Tony say when he finds out you’re secretly helping to save your company? Can you even date if you’re both Apollo employees?”
“I don’t know! That’s what’s eating me inside. We’re too new for me to know for sure. He could be mad, he could try and push harder on the buyout…It could get really ugly.” Fear grips my heart when I mentally review her last question. “And holy hell, the thought of a company policy against dating never even occurred to me.”
“Obviously, you can’t tell him what’s happening on your end. You could lose your job and the new position if they find out you are literally sleeping with the enemy.”
I refrain from telling her a
bout the lower original offer that came in. Maybe Tony couldn’t get his bosses to sign off on the higher amount. I was led to believe he was the primary on the deal and capable of making all the decisions, but something must have happened I’m unaware of. I’ve been dying to ask him, but we agreed not to talk about work last night. “Now, you know what’s eating me.”
Carla lets out a dramatic sigh and flounces into the closest chair. “Yeah, and it’s a doozy. You need tonight to let off steam more than I do.” She jumps up and heads to my bedroom. “Come on, I plan on raiding your closet to dress you up in something drop dead sex-say.”
I laugh and trail after her. “Why? Don’t I have enough on my plate without adding more men to the mix?”
“Now see, that’s where you’re wrong, sister.” She rummages through my clothes, her eagle eye unerringly picking out my daring new purchases. “You dress first and foremost for yourself, not a man. I’ll admit I was jealous when you started changing last week.” She looks back at me and winks. “Not one of my finer moments. But traveling this week gave me more time than I wanted for a little much-needed introspection. I realized it was my own dissatisfaction with my life that had me feeling uncomfortable with what you were doing with yours.” Her expression turns to shock when she discovers the leather pants hanging with the tags still on them. “Oh. My. God.” She waves them in the air. “You have to wear these tonight.”
My face heats. “No way! I’m not ready for those yet.”
“Dammit! Yes, you are. Look in the mirror.” She points to the oval one hanging over my dresser. “You are gorgeous and in the prime of your life. When is the right time to wear something sexy on a night out with your friends? Now! Don’t try and tell me I’m wrong.”
I bite my lip, still unsure. “I dunno. And hey, where is the girl who acted like her nose was out of joint last week over soup, huh?”
“I told you. I was acting like a self-conscious, jealous bitch and I only realized it when you accused me of wanting to be with you because I was prettier.” She whips back to me and points her finger. “Which I’m not. You are stunning. You just need to believe it.”
She returns to the closet and with a triumphant screech, hauls out the black leather bustier I bought with the pants. She spins and shakes the garment at me. “Do you have any idea how good you are going to look in this? Tiny waist and perfect pert boobs?”
I frown, not sure I can pull it off. “Umm…”
She wiggles her eyebrows. A determined glint comes into her eye. “You will be wearing this drop dead, sexy-ass outfit if I have to clonk you on the head and dress you myself!”
I laugh, moving closer to wrap my arms around her. “You’re the best, Carla.” I step back and eye the outfit I felt bold-as-brass trying on in the store. “Okay, I’ll wear it, but you’d better be honest and tell me if it’s too much. The goal is to not look like a street walker, you know.”
“Impossible. With your fresh face and simple elegance no one would ever mistake you for a hooker in that outfit.” She spots the black boots with the spiked silver heel. “Oh,” she lovingly runs her hand over them. “But if we add these you might just pass for a dominatrix in training.”
Carla and I meet Gemma and Katrina at an upscale place I’ve never been to. Katrina works for a PR firm and obtained tickets through her company. Something about a new client and a special DJ event, but I wasn’t paying attention, my nerves kept me distracted. Katrina’s a high-energy redhead with the curves and pale skin to turn any man’s head. I love her attitude. Gemma is a sassy brunette with a boyfriend who’s head over heels in love with her.
Both women eye my outfit when we step out of the cab and give me a nod of approval as we enter the bar. “Looking good, Heather,” Gemma says with a wink. “Remind me to send pictures to Steve so he knows exactly what he’s missing tonight.”
I force a smile, rubbing a hand self-consciously on one thigh, feeling the mold of the snug leather over the curve. Every fiber of my being is acutely aware of how my outfit fits. In the end, I opted for a cropped jacket to partly cover the exposed leather ties of the top and chose the new red heels over the black boots. Carla’s comment about a “dominatrix in training” made me feel too uncomfortable. Sure, she can tease me about being a vanilla dom, but stepping out looking like one is more than I can handle for now.
Music pounds through the hidden speakers, the bass reverberating up through the floor into my bones. The lighting isn’t bright or dim, but more of a twilight. I like it compared to the normal darkness of some dance clubs. A group of men at the center bar immediately check out the four of us when we saunter in. Katrina and Gemma are two of Carla’s yoga buddies, and both have exquisite bodies.
“You’re drawing every eye our way, Heather.” Katrina says with a nudge of her hip. “Way to go, girlfriend.”
Their comments boost my confidence even more. I’m enjoying feeling sexy and strong, glad I opted for the red heels and short jacket. Maybe if I were with Tony I’d feel different. I bet he would go crazy for the boots and leather pants. Picturing his heat-filled gaze and the accompanying bulge in his pants draws a flush to my face.
I’m desperate for this whole stressful work situation to be over. I’m so scared of how things will turn out. Why should I have to choose between him and my job? It’s not fair.
Katrina catches my eye, nodding toward the bar. “Let’s get a drink,” she yells over the music.
A group of men parts at our approach, giving us a narrow pathway to the bar. Appraising looks and welcoming smiles rain down upon our small group. One opens his mouth to speak and Carla shushes him with a wave of her hand. “We’re here for a ladies night out.” The wine we drank at my house makes her bolder than usual. “You’re cute, but we came to dance. Not pick up men.”
The man good-naturedly tilts his head and leaves us be, the interest in his eyes saying he’ll try again later. We get our drinks and slowly make our way to the dance floor. It’s barely past ten and the dance area stands mostly empty.
Gemma shouts in Carla’s direction, “Are you sure you want to do this? We could wait a little bit ‘til the place fills up.”
“We’re not here for them, ladies. We’re here for ourselves.” She downs her drink and places it on a nearby table. “Let’s dance!”
My face stretches into a huge smile at her silliness. This night is totally what I need.
After fifteen minutes on the dance floor, a hand touches my waist from behind. I glance back to see the man from the bar Carla shushed. His eyebrows rise in question, asking for a dance. I smile and nod, content to share a song with a stranger.
He’s not as good-looking as Tony, but that’s okay. His hands linger on my waist and his eyes promise more if I’m interested. I smile, pleased with his offer, but shake my head. I don’t plan on taking him home, just dancing for a little while.
I consider teasing him by dancing close, but I refrain. He doesn’t deserve me toying with him. Sweat trickles down my back under the jacket and my face flushes from the exertion. I’d like to take my coat off, but I don’t want to invite more attention than I can handle.
Who knew a night out with friends could be so uplifting? The handsome man dancing with me whirls me by the hand and then pulls me in close.
The power feels good. Very, very good.
Chapter Sixteen
Tony
“You’ve been a fucking bear all day,” Marcus grumps at me. “What’s your problem?”
I ignore my well-meaning but obnoxious friend. I can’t very well tell him that even though I made love to Heather this morning, I’m in a foul mood because I can’t see her again until tomorrow. At least she agreed not to work on Saturday and come to Jersey with me. I’ll have to be content with that.
Unwilling to give up, Marcus plunges on. “Are you pissed about Brian and the Parkerson deal still?”
“Still?” I say, incredulous. “I was only reassigned yesterday. Am I supposed to roll over and take it?”
/> Marcus grins, pleased to get a rise out of me. “No, only a whiny bitch rolls over and takes it.”
“Well, then. We’ve established I’m not a whiny bitch. Anything else or can I get a drink in peace?”
We worked ‘til seven tonight and then caught a quick dinner at a sushi place. The food was great but the atmosphere wasn’t conducive to hanging out and drinking all night, which is what I feel like doing. Maybe I can drown out the feeling of unease coiling in my gut. If this is what being in love feels like I think I definitely dislike it.
“Let’s head over to The Parlor,” Marcus suggests. “It’s only two blocks down. I heard there’s a special event later on. We’ve got almost two hours before the DJ comes on and the place turns into a club.”
My silence is my agreement and we make our way to the bar. I don’t think I’ve been this depressed on a Friday night in years. What is it that’s truly eating at me? I know it can’t be work. I’ve dedicated so much of my life to the place that this latest knife in the back barely hurts.
We sit on stools at the bar and order drinks. The place looks hip and trendy. Not the kind of place I want to be caught in when the music kicks in. Too many gold-digging bitches looking for a free ride.
The vehemence in my thoughts surprises me. Now, where the hell did that come from? I never used to blink at the idea of picking up an attractive young woman who liked money. Is it because Heather is seemingly uninterested in my substantial portfolio? Or is it because she’s the first woman I’ve dated who lives within her means and supports herself?
I shake my head as I stare into my beer. There’s something to be said about dating a woman who doesn’t need you to bail her out of her life, but wants you in her life nonetheless.
Damn, I’ve got it bad. When the hell did this sneak up on me?
She had you when she told you to get on your knees.
A snort escapes me before I tamp it down. Yup, that sounds about right.
Many drinks later the music kicks in. Marcus and I have chatted about work and sports for the last two hours, so I don’t mind the change to loud music and a driving beat. Makes it easier to dodge his persistent questions about Heather. How can I answer him when I don’t know what’s going on myself?
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