by Skyla Madi
“Out of the two?”
A smirk finds his lips. “Paula White is your sister, not your mother. Her real name is Carrie Stevenson.”
The feeling of my jaw hanging way lower than normal doesn’t bother me. I slowly shake my head and try to process everything Jake’s been throwing at me.
My mother is actually my sister.
That dream I had really was true.
I guess it never dawned on me what that would mean for every other member of my family if what Jake’s saying is true.
He finds my hand underneath the comforter and squeezes, sorrow dripping from his eyes. “You’ll need to call her tomorrow morning so she won’t worry.”
My mother.
He means my sister.
A sister I’d never known who took me and tried to save me.
Chapter Eighteen
Three little words
The sunlight tickles my nose before it reaches my cheek. The best part of waking up next to Jake is the warm cocoon he places you in; it’s like a safety net of complete tranquility and comfort. His cinnamon breath reaches my nose, and I inhale him into me as much as I can before he wakes up and my dream shatters back into reality.
Olivia White.
That’s the girl I know now.
But I don’t know how to be anyone else.
Jake’s eyes don’t open, but he reaches for me and pulls me into his bare chest. He tucks me under his strong chin and holds me against him; his heart beats so hard it feels like it’s outside of his warm skin. I snuggle next to him the best I can and wait for what seems like hours.
***
Why can’t I scream? The pain in my head feels like someone’s drilling into my eye sockets with a power drill. The light hurts even worse, but the panic that sits in my chest as people come into view is what’s making my heart weak.
“She’s awake!” a girl with bleached hair says. She’s around my age and dressed like she’s just come home from clubbing. Her mini-skirt rides her thighs, and the crisscrossed, skin-tight navy blouse she’s got on looks like a piece of cellophane around her torso. “Hey.” She waves her long fingernails in front of my face. “Can you hear me?”
“Jessie, get out of her face!” Another woman in the room snaps her fingers. Deep down, I think that…maybe she looks familiar, but everything hurts too much to care. “What’s going to happen to her?”
“Here,” a man says, “take this envelope. Michael has secured new identities for each of you. You’ll be living in Silver Lake, California. There’s a decent-sized suburban home there that isn’t in his name anymore. He gifted it to Miss Claudine’s estate years ago, and her sister has agreed to let you live there as long as you need.”
“Is she in danger?”
He shakes his head and hands a large yellow envelope to her as well. “That question remains unclear. We don’t believe she’s in danger now that Michael is in prison. We don’t have any reason to believe whoever sabotaged the brakes wanted her dead.”
The woman walks slowly to me and smiles down into my open eyes. “Then why are we moving her? The whole point was because she was in danger, and now you’re saying she’s not.”
“There are still people out there Michael has bankrupted and who could very well take matters into their own hands like this person did. You have to understand, this embezzlement runs very, very deep. He owes a lot of money to a lot of people.”
A man comes up next to the woman and hugs her from behind. They look like nice people, the generic kind you find in a picture frame before you buy it. “What about money? We can’t exactly have real jobs.”
“Michael’s made arrangements with Miss Claudine’s estate, and you’ll be taken care of. There’s also Lacey’s trust fund, but that’s frozen until the Feds decide otherwise.”
The bleached-haired girl sighs. “I think we should keep her.”
“She’s not a dog, Jess,” the man scolds her.
“She’s my sister. We have to help her. I tried helping, and look what happened. Maybe without Michael being the puppet behind me, I can do more good than harm to her. What’s our background story?” She opens the envelope like she’s done this before. “The White Family. I’m Paula White, you’re David White…” She turns to the man and smiles. “…and you’re Caitlyn White.”
The girl groans. “Such a lame name.”
“And Lacey is…Olivia White.”
“I like that name better. Can we switch?”
The woman shakes her head and looks at the man, who hugs her. Silently, they have a conversation as the feeling comes back into my skin, and I start to scream in pain; my voice finally finds itself, and it deafens the room.
“My head!” I scream. “Help me, my head!”
A man in a white coat rushes into the room and injects a liquid into the IV, making the pain subside slowly over the course of a few minutes.
“How’s that?” He pats my shoulder. “I need to clear the room to examine her, please.”
“I’ll stay,” the woman speaks up. “She’s my sis—she’s my daughter.”
The man in the white coat nods. “Everyone else, out.”
Before they can leave, there’s a scuffle outside of the doors, and the man who hugs the nice woman opens it and closes it behind him again.
I hear someone screaming. It’s a man’s deep voice…and he’s scared and desperate.
“Lacey! Lacey! Lacey!”
***
“Olivia?” Jake shakes me out of my dream. “Are you okay?”
It feels like there’s a thousand cotton balls shoved into my mouth. I can’t speak—or even begin to explain what the hell I just dreamed. I just want to enjoy waking up next to him.
“Just a dream,” I breathe out slowly. “No big deal.”
He doesn’t believe me, but he doesn’t say it out loud. “It’s nearly ten already.” His wide yawn makes me smile. “Do you want to call your mom?”
Now it feels weird when he calls her that. “You mean, my sister?”
“I know you’re confused—”
I push myself away from him and plant my feet on the floor. “I’ll call her now.” I trot off to find my phone inside my bag where I left it in the living room. The house is so warm and inviting that every room I shuffle into does something magical to my soul. Jake’s feet slide across the floor behind me as I open a door to the sunroom, and his arms wrap around my waist.
“I’m sorry I upset you.” His lips find the delicate skin beneath my ear. “You should call her when you’re comfortable. I shouldn’t be pushing you to do it.”
“Thank you. What’s this room?”
He clears his throat and slides around me, his hands never leaving the curve of my hips. One arm waves around, and his lips open to flash me a toothy smile. “This is your sunroom.” He chuckles and rubs his jaw. “Your mom had one at the house you grew up in, and when I bought this house, I had it specially designed for you.”
My cheeks flush. “Sounds like I had a pretty cushy life.”
His eyes narrow. “I got out of that business with your father and did something constructive with the money I made. I didn’t need my trust fund because I was smart with the money I earned—don’t discount what I’ve done here.”
I haven’t seen the scary side of Jake in a while, but this is proof that it hasn’t dwindled away. He notices that I’m nervous and takes a step backward, shaking his head.
“I wasn’t discounting what you’ve done.” I glare at him. “What’s with the scary face?”
Jake doesn’t look amused. “I have a problem.” He sighs and lets go of my body to sit down in a leather chair next to us. “When I was younger and into things I shouldn’t have been…I developed a serious anger problem. But you pulled me out of it, Olivia…you saved me.”
Whoa.
That’s a lot of pressure to put on someone.
“Before I make the call, I want you to know that,” I sit down in a chair and look back up at him, “—even though
I don’t remember a lot of what you tell me, that doesn’t mean I don’t believe you.”
He kneels down in front of me and runs his thumb along my bottom lip. “Oh, baby, if you only truly remembered how much I fucking love you, then it would help take some of your pain away. I looked for you for an entire year, and you were under my damn nose. I intend on making every day of your life special, Olivia. You can count on that.”
A smile creeps across my lips. “You’re pretty special too, Jake.”
He blushes and looks down at the floor. “I’d hoped when we met again that everything would go back to normal, but I’m happy that it didn’t. I love Lacey Cervase, and I love Olivia White. A name is just a name.”
I snort, pretending to be offended. “Is that right?”
He laughs and kisses my jawline with grace. “That’s right. It’s easy to love you, baby.” His lips find my collarbone, and he nips at the skin as I giggle beneath his weight now pushing me into the chair. What am I doing to myself? Why am I stopping myself from getting what I want for once? Putting aside the sadness of living a lie…I deserve to be happy with someone like Jake. He’s real and genuine and completely into me too.
He finds my eyes, and the hunger reaching for me paralyzes my bones. “Tell me more of the story, Jake.” I find a soothing voice and inject it into words. “We left off with who my real father is, but nothing else.”
He sighs. “I don’t like talking about him, but you deserve more, I agree.”
I raise my eyebrows and wait. Once he realizes that he can’t get out of it, his breath billows from his lungs, and he kneels in front of me, both hands on either side of my thighs.
“Okay, let me think. When you were fifteen, we started seeing each other. Everything was hot like fire, and we were so inseparable that my brothers often teased me about it. I don’t think you remember any of them, do you?”
I shake my head and lower my eyes to my lap in shame.
“Don’t do that.” He tips my chin back up. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of. You didn’t do this.”
I wipe a tear from my eye. “But you hold guilt because of it.”
“Trust me, baby, if I could take it all back, I would. I would still have you, and everything would be like it was before. Even if I don’t deserve you.”
My arms snake around his neck, and I don’t have to pull him down to kiss me because he’s already halfway there. When our lips meet, everything else melts away. He notices the feeling too, so he pulls away from me, and a sexy grin appears on his lips.
“We’re getting distracted.”
I blush. “I’m sorry, that was my fault.”
He laughs, and the heartiness of it makes my heart feel full. “Never apologize for kissing me…never. I’ll never apologize for wanting you, because I can’t help that I do.”
Jake’s eyes get dark as I squirm in my skin. “Olivia, you are allowed to have your own thoughts.”
“My own thoughts aren’t mine, are they?” I blink a few times to try and suck the tears back into my eyes. “I thought my life was a mess before, and now it’s just an even bigger catastrophe.”
He sighs and pulls me out of the chair, placing his body beneath mine and putting me onto his lap when he sits down where I was moments before. “Let’s just get one thing straight right now, okay? I know it’s hard to trust someone you don’t know and your instincts are screaming at you to run. For all you know, I’m some crazy fucking psychopath feeding you lies to reach my own end game.”
He notices my eyebrows rise. “If at any time this is too much for you or you don’t feel safe around me, you take the set of car keys hanging next to the front door and your car is the garage. You take it and run if you want.”
The lump inside my throat wants to come out and play, but I smash it back down into my chest cavity as fast as I can. I don’t want Jake to see just how naïve I really am—regardless of how much truth is smeared across my damn face. “I have a car here? Like, my beat-up Mazda is in the garage?”
His copper blonde curls shake side to side; the laugh he puts into the air makes me snap my legs together in hopes he doesn’t notice how completely spent I am on him. “No, like your car before that car, I guess. You have the matching Mercedes to mine…only in a deep blue color. It’s been sitting in there since…” His gaze falls to my lap. “Well, you know.”
All I can do is smile like a damn idiot. “Yeah, I know. Maybe I’ll take it for a spin later. Is that okay?”
When our eyes lock together, I want to climb out of the deep fire pit I’ve flung myself into. “Yeah, baby, that’s okay. I’m just glad you’re home; this house missed you.”
I snicker. “How can a house miss someone?”
“She missed you fussing over her is what I mean. The wood floors in the kitchen miss their special cleaning days, and that fireplace over there…” He gently squeezes my chin and pushes it toward the cold and empty fireplace. “…misses you lying naked in front of it.”
Fire.
The fire in his eyes is taking me over, and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. Not that I really want to. I’ve given up putting that wall up against Jake because I know he’s not here to hurt me. The last thing on his mind is how to push me away when he’s fought so hard to find me again. I’m starting to sound like him, but I don’t care. If he says it’s the truth…then it’s the truth. Still, I feel guilty not calling my mother—or sister, whoever she freaking is—and letting her know that I’m okay and Jake hasn’t run off with me.
“I have to call my mom.” I pull my phone out of my pocket. “Can you give me a few minutes alone?”
He kisses my forehead before standing up to leave the room. When he’s gone, the air gets cold, and it’s really noticeable to the point where my skin has chills. It’s funny how much of a hole Jake creates when he leaves a room, and I take note to put that in the category of things I completely crave about him.
“Livvie?” my mother’s voice squeals into the phone. “Are you okay? Where did he take you?”
“I’m in Seattle at Jake’s house. Calm down.” I yawn and pull my feet up into the sofa next to me. I feel strange, like I’m acting differently than my normal self. “I’m staying here for a few days.”
She sighs loudly. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. It’s not exactly safe there for you…”
“No one here wants to hurt me.”
“Olivia, you don’t know that. What about the man who broke into the house and put a knife to your throat? What if he finds you there…or someone else does?”
“Jake will keep me safe. He won’t let anything bad happen to me. I just need some time away from Silver Lake.”
“Away from Silver Lake or away from us?”
I don’t know how to answer her without hurting her feelings.
“I just wish you would’ve told me the truth. It’s not fun being part of someone’s secret and living life like nothing’s wrong.”
When I find my voice, I wish I hadn’t. My mother sits on her end of the phone and cries. After her sobs come to an end, she apologizes a few times and clears her throat. “We didn’t know what else to do; we didn’t know if anyone was after you, and we didn’t know if you’d be safe in Seattle with Jake. You have to believe me, Olivia, we never meant to hurt you.”
Even though I’m still fuzzy on what actually happened, I stand my ground because she doesn’t need to know that I don’t know everything yet. “I just need a few days to wrap my head around this. I promise I’ll be back,” I say, but she’s already sobbing again. “Mom?”
She stops and waits a few seconds before answering. “Yes?”
“I know that you’re my sister, but I don’t know you as a sister. I know you as my mom, and that’s what it’s going to continue to be, okay?”
If she could scream and jump for joy, I’m sure she would’ve. “Okay, Livvie,” she whispers, telling me she loves me before hanging up. She didn’t give me a chance to explain anything else or talk
to my dad or Caitlyn, probably because they’re upset with me too. I can’t think about that—I have to keep my thoughts on what’s in front of me.
How exactly did I lose my memories?
“I’m ready to know more. I have more questions.” I walk into the kitchen where Jake is hunched over the breakfast bar with a sandwich falling from his mouth. He smiles, and it’s heartwarming as pieces of meat fall back down to his plate. “I want to know why I can’t remember anything.”
He coughs. “Is that a question, though?”
I glare at him. “Jake, why can’t I remember anything?”
He swallows the large bite and puts the sandwich back down but looks at it like it’s the saddest thing he’s ever been through. “Okay.” He smacks his hands together. “Toward the end of everything, your father—Michael—he started barking up trees in a lot of the wrong places. He’d taken money from some pretty influential people and squandered it, and they weren’t happy.”
I sit down next to him and take the sandwich from his plate. His eyes grow wide when he sees me shove the sandwich into my mouth, letting the delicious meat tickle my taste buds. I laugh through the mouthful of food and put the sandwich back down. “Sorry, were you still eating that?”
“You—did you—what the hell?” He laughs and snatches the food back from me. “Yeah, I’m eating that, you little sneak. You were always stealing my food, and I don’t know where you put it in that tight little body of yours.” His eyes glow as he inhales another bite of the food and hands it back to me.
“I just wanted a taste.”
Growling, he puts the sandwich down and twirls me toward him so he can have a better shot at me. “Funny, that’s the same thing I’ve wanted for over a week now.”
“Jake—”
He holds up his hand away from me. “Okay, okay. Back to the question. So these people that he owed all this money to wanted it back, of course. He wouldn’t give it to them—or couldn’t maybe, I don’t know—but a few of them were linked to some pretty fucking bad situations in Seattle and around the country. I’m talking mafia-style people, Olivia.”