Chapter 17
Devon pulled into the driveway at Dusty Dreams and sat for a moment staring at the house. She heaved a big sigh and climbed out of the truck to trudge to the door and ring the bell. In just seconds, Jessie pulled the door open.
"Hi, Devon. Come in, please." Jessie had a concerned look on her face that deepened when she saw her friend. "Brady will be in any minute. Let's go in the kitchen. Would you like something to drink?"
Devon shook her head. "No, thank you, I'm fine."
Jessie gave her a keen look. "Are you? You look like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. What's wrong?"
Devon thought desperately that if Jessie didn't stop being so nice, she was never going to get through her story. "Let's wait for Brady. I need to tell you both, and just once would be best."
"All right. How's Jacob?"
Jessie's question nearly did her in. She took a deep breath and tried to slow her racing heart. "Jacob is fine. He's looking forward to school and the puppy." With a sigh of gratitude, she heard the four-wheeler pull up in the barnyard, and a moment later, Brady came through the back door with a big grin for Devon and a kiss for Jessie.
"Hi, Devon, how are you doing?"
Devon gripped her hands together and said, "I'm okay, thank you."
Brady could see that she was clearly not okay. He joined them at the table and looked at Devon for a moment and then said, "Why don't you tell us why you're here. Whatever it is, we'll do our best to help."
Devon closed her eyes and prayed for strength. "I need to tell both of you my story. I want you to know that I realize I should have told you a long time ago, and I regret that I didn't. I had my reasons, but now they don't seem to have made much sense."
Jessie looked mystified, and finally she said, "Go ahead. Just take your time and tell us."
Devon started her story. "I had a relationship a long time ago with a guy named Grant, who I thought I was really in love with. I thought he was charming and sexy, but in time, it became clear that he was honestly the most self-centered person I've ever met. But I didn't understand that for a good long time. We reached a point where he told me that he really wanted to have a baby. I wasn't sure that I was ready for that, but I was willing to do it for him. So, I went off birth control and we started trying to get pregnant. When it didn't happen, was when he started to show his true colors. He told me that if I wasn't such a frigid bitch, I'd be pregnant. He told me that he knew the problem was mine and he actually went to a doctor and got tested. He told me that he was perfectly normal, and the doctor assured him that there was no reason he couldn't expect to father a child. I started to see just what he was really like and I also could see that he didn't really want a child because he'd love to raise one. He just likes to own things, to show off his possessions to his friends and colleagues, like his personal accomplishments or something. It's all about his ego and his manhood.
"Anyway, it fell apart pretty quickly after that, and I knew that I needed to get out of the relationship. I remember the last time we were together, he had to have me one last time and then throw it in my face that I was giving up the best thing I'd ever had. I didn't want to, but I went along with it. I just wanted to get it over with and be done with him. It was completely without feeling of any kind, just cold and impersonal. When he was finished, he called me a frigid bitch again and he left. That was the last time I saw him."
Brady was starting to get pissed. "Is this guy back and bothering you?"
Devon raised a hand and said, "Please. There's a lot more I have to tell you before we get to that."
"Okay, go ahead."
With another deep breath, Devon went on with her story. "I wasn't exactly what you could call heartbroken. I was more relieved than anything. But it was such an empty feeling to just have it end like that. I really had thought that I loved him for a long time. So, I went out for a few nights after work, just to be around other people and have a couple of drinks. The third night, this guy sat down next to me and started talking to me. I wasn't looking to pick up a guy, but he was just a really nice guy and he was easy to talk to. He was really kind to me, and I needed that so badly at the time. We sat and talked for a long time, and when I left, I promised to meet him there again the next night. We got along even better the second night. I could relax with him and just have an enjoyable conversation. He was there for training at Fort Benning, so he didn't actually live around there. Once I'd gotten myself all talked out, I finally gave him a chance to tell me about himself. He said he was from Nebraska but hadn't lived there long. He was going to be shipped out to Afghanistan for a few months. We talked and talked, and I let him take me home. I invited him in, and he ended up spending the night. I honestly wasn't looking for a one-night stand; that wasn't my thing at all, but that's what happened. I guess it filled a need for both of us. We had one more night together after that, and then he was gone."
Jessie was gazing at Devon with fascinated sympathy and Brady had an inscrutable look on his face. "When was this, Devon?" Brady asked quietly.
"It was roughly five years ago. I went on with my life, and it wasn't until a couple of months later that I realized I was pregnant. I had one thought; that I couldn't let Grant find out because I didn't want him to have anything to do with me ever again. I worked as long as I could and then moved back in with my dad. I told myself that the baby wasn't Grant's because I couldn't bear the thought that such a selfish bastard could be the father of my child. So, I just decided to think that the stranger I'd had a couple of nights with was the father. I didn't have any way to find him, and to be honest, I didn't try too hard. I liked the idea of raising my child on my own, and I had my dad to be a male figure in the baby's life. Dad couldn't wait for my child to be born. When Jacob was born, Dad absolutely doted on him. I started my work, writing, and we had a couple of great years, the three of us. Then Dad had a massive heart attack and died." Devon sat back with a deep breath and asked, "Could I have a glass of water?"
Jessie said, "Of course." She got bottles of water out of the refrigerator for all three of them. When she sat back down, Brady took her hand and nodded at Devon to continue.
Devon took a long drink of water. "I realized before long that there was nothing holding me in Georgia with Dad gone. I took care of his things and put the house up for sale. I wasn't sure where to go, but I knew I wanted a fresh start somewhere else. I didn't want to live in such a populated area anymore, and I started thinking about the things the guy had told me in our couple of nights together. He said he'd bought a place in the country. He said…he said it was near a small town, where things were simpler than in the city and people were nicer. He said that he'd always wanted to own some acreage and, well, I started thinking more and more about moving to that kind of place."
Devon fiddled with her water bottle and looked up to see Brady's hard expression. "He said the only family he had left was his sister, and their dream had always been to own a small ranch and build it into a good life. His ranch was in Nebraska, and that's where I went to look for a place after the house sold."
Jessie was staring at her, her face stunned and confused. "Devon, what are you saying?"
Brady said, "I think you'd better just say it straight out."
Devon said quietly, "The guy I met at the bar, his name was Jake."
Jessie looked horrified. "Are you saying that Jacob is Jake's son?"
"No! No, I just…I don't know! I didn't know very much about him at all, and I didn't know who he was, really, and I never knew that he was your brother until the first time you had Jacob and me here for the cookout. When I saw the picture on the piano of Brady and Jake, that's when I knew. I don't know who Jacob's father is, and I never wanted to find out that it was Grant, so I let myself think all this time that it was the nice guy I had spent a couple of nights with. I didn't know anything about what happened to him. I just knew he went off to Afghanistan, and I never heard from him again. Honestly, the first time I knew that the guy
was your brother was when I came here and saw his picture."
"But, Devon, that was a year ago, almost! Why didn't you tell me right away?" Jessie couldn't comprehend what she was hearing.
"Because there was too much to lose! First of all, Jake was dead, so how could I even find out if he was Jacob's father? And I couldn't stand the thought of going to Grant to rule him out. It might not rule him out. Jacob looks like me, not like either of them. I couldn't bear the idea of finding out that Grant was Jacob's father, that I had to let him into Jacob's life. It's why I wanted to keep to myself, just me and my son. I didn't want to share him with anybody! Especially not if it turned out to be Grant!"
Jessie looked horrified. "But my brother is dead! And Jacob could be his son, my nephew! How could you keep that from me? And if you never had any intention of sharing him with me, why are you telling me now? He could be Jake's, and I've lost three years of his life!"
Devon looked crushed. "I know, and I'm so sorry. I'm really sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing, but now I know it was all wrong. I wish with all my heart that I had told you from the first moment I knew. I was just so scared."
Brady's face looked like stone. "Why are you telling us now?"
Devon's face was pale. "Grant found out that I had a child. I tried to tell him differently, but he had a newspaper clipping of the birth announcement. He's threatening to take him away."
Brady gave her a piercing look. "Devon, you know better than that. First of all, you have no idea if he's Grant's son. Secondly, men don't just come along and get to take custody. It's nearly impossible to take a child from his mother unless she's got big problems."
Devon tried to compose herself. "I know that, but it's not that hard to get rights to visitation, is it? Grant is a horrible person, and he would never offer anything good to Jacob. The only way to be sure is to get him tested for paternity, and that could give him rights to Jacob. I can't stand that! I'd have to run away, and that would be a helluva lot harder if Grant's gotten a paternity test."
Jessie looked panicked. "You can't run away! You can't just take him and go away; you have to find out if he's Jake's son."
Brady said coolly, "Devon, Jake was in the Army. In fact, he died defending our country. There are records. You can find out if he was Jacob's father."
Devon looked at him with despair. "Can I really? Are you sure about that?"
"Yes, I am sure. I knew a guy who got his girlfriend pregnant, and she had to get him to take a paternity test. It would probably take longer than usual, getting the permission, since Jake is deceased, but I know it can be done."
"How do I put my son through all that?"
"You have to. Grant is here, and he's not going away, is he?"
Devon said miserably, "No, he's not."
Jessie looked at Devon with wounded eyes. "If Grant hadn't come back here, would you have told us?"
Devon said honestly, "Yes. I was trying to get up the courage to do it. In fact, I drove over here once to do exactly that, but you had people here. It was Brady's family, and you all were having such a good time together, I knew I couldn't do it then. It just wasn't the right time. But seeing you all together made me wish for family, and it made me realize that it could be a good thing for Jacob to be part of your family. It was just so hard. It was hard that first time that I brought Jacob here for your cookout. And it wasn't because I knew about Jake; I didn't. It was just hard to share Jacob. It made me afraid of losing him. And I was really afraid. I didn't know what might happen. I haven't shared Jacob with anyone since my dad passed away. It's just been him and me. He's everything to me."
Brady said, "So are you ready and willing to set this in motion, verifying if Jake was the father?"
"I-I need to think."
Jessie rose from her chair and said, "No. No, you don't need to think about this anymore. You've stalled and stalled, and it's time you face this and do the right thing. Jacob has a right to know his family, if it's us. There aren't any excuses good enough for putting it off any longer. If Jake had a son, we have a right to be part of his life, and Jacob has a right to be part of ours."
Devon felt a spark of anger, but she recognized Jessie's as well and couldn't deny that she would feel the same way in her shoes. She met Jessie's gaze and looked at the cold expression on Brady's face and knew they were right. "All right. I don't know how to go about it."
Brady said, "I'll make a call and see what has to be done. And I expect you to call me if Grant tries anything whatsoever."
Devon flushed and said, "I don't need you to step in with Grant."
"I don't care if you feel the need or not. You call me if he makes any moves, and I'll put a stop to it. I mean it, Devon. This isn't all up to you anymore."
Devon stared at him. It went against everything in her nature, but she finally relented. "I'll call you."
"Good. I'll be in touch as soon as I know what to do."
Devon got to her feet and looked quietly at Jessie. "Jessie, I'm truly sorry."
There was raw pain in the eyes that Jessie turned on her. "Jake was in the Army. You knew that, and you even knew where he shipped out of. You could have found him. You could have known years ago what happened to him. I could have known long ago that my brother had a son. How could you do that? Just let it go, without ever trying to find him?"
Devon gestured helplessly. "I don't…I'm sorry. I'd change it if I could."
Jessie said, "Would you? Would you really?" She turned and left the room with tears running silently down her face.
Devon bowed her head and said quietly, "I'll go."
Brady walked her silently to the door and she could feel him standing there watching as she got into her truck and left. The tears coursed down Devon's face all the way home.
Chapter 18
Brady hung up the phone and turned to Jessie. "I got an appointment for Devon to speak with someone who will meet her at the recruiter's office. They'll get everything rolling, and once they do, they'll get a swab from Jacob. It's going to take some time, but Jake and my CO is trying to grease the wheels a little."
Jessie's face was pale, and there were dark hollows under her eyes. "Thank you, Brady. I just want to know. I'm afraid to hope, but I can't help it."
Brady put his arms around her and hugged her close. "I know, baby. We're going to find out."
"It's not just hope for my sake, it's hope for Jacob's sake too. To know that he's Jake's son and that Grant has no rights to him, would be so good for Jacob. He could grow up knowing all about Jake, just like Caleb knows about his dad. He never knew him, but he still has a connection to him, and Kayla's making sure that he always will. He could grow up knowing his dad was someone to be proud of. And would there be some kind of survivor's benefit for Jacob?"
"I don't know, baby, but they'll get this test done, and if they determine that Jake was his dad, they'll cover all that kind of info. I assume there probably are."
"I got a death benefit from the Army when Jake was killed. That probably belonged to Jacob. I was the beneficiary of his life insurance policy."
"Don't get ahead of yourself, baby. First, we'll find out for sure, then we'll get all that sorted out."
Jessie said, "He's an awesome kid. I can absolutely believe he could be Jake's."
Brady agreed, "He is a great kid. Jessie, I know it's hard, but you're going to have to be patient with this. It's not going to be done overnight. I don't want you to hope for it too hard."
Jessie sighed. "I don't think that's possible. It would mean the world to me. I think it would to you too."
Brady couldn't argue with that. The next days or weeks, while they waited, were going to be hard. He called Devon and told her what he'd found out and arranged to take her to the appointment. She balked at that, but Brady wouldn't back down and the steel in his voice finally made her realize she was wasting her breath. Jessie's face was stony as she listened to Brady's end of the call. When he hung up, he gave her a penetrating look.
>
"Jessie, I know you're pissed at Devon, and I don't blame you at all. But if Jacob is Jake's son, he comes with a mother too, and we're going to have to get along with her if we're going to have a relationship with her son."
"He's Jake's son!" Jessie snapped.
"Yes, we hope he is. But he's her son too, and she's been a good mother to him. We can't deny that, and we're going to have to find a way to forgive her."
Jessie looked at him stubbornly. "How do I do that? What she did was unforgivable."
Brady took her by the shoulders and looked into her eyes. "What she did was wrong. Nevertheless, you're going to have to forgive her if you want to be part of Jacob's life. If it turns out to be true."
There were tears in Jessie's voice, "I know you're right, but I don't know how to do it. Brady, if Grant hadn't found out about Jacob, she might not have ever told us."
"We don't have any way to know that. But wouldn't it make it all easier if we believe what she said about wanting to tell us?"
"Yes. But it's going to take me some time to get there. I'm just so damn mad at her right now. If she'd done things differently, I'd have welcomed her as a sister. Now, how do I trust her?"
Brady said, "Let's just take it one day at a time. I know you, Jessie; I don't believe you'll keep on holding a grudge. Especially if it means you can be Aunt Jessie to Jacob."
Those words actually made her smile, just a little. Brady tilted her chin up and gave her a sweet kiss. "I love you, darlin'. I think you'd make a great aunt."
Jessie hugged him hard. "No better than the great uncle you'd make. Let's just hope it goes quickly and we get the right answer."
"I'm right with you, baby. Now, are you going to be all right? I've got some work I really need to get done before the end of the day."
A Dusty Dreams Wedding Page 14