It was Hope’s turn to break down, and she hugged her friend and sobbed.
“Thank you, thank you so much!”
Hope had been wishing for something to push her. Something to tell her she was doing the right thing, and this was it.
With her mind made up, she sealed the letter.
Chapter 4 – Riding Out West
The next couple weeks went by in a blur for Hope. She didn’t know what she would have done had Anna Tumbler not been there to help her. She was beginning to battle morning sickness, which she feared would slow her down, but as soon as she got a reply to her letter, she was determined to go no matter what.
“His name is Jacob Ray. He’s got an established house he built himself from the ground up, so he’s not afraid of hard work, and he says he doesn’t think the baby is going to get in the way of things. All in all, I think it’s a good move.”
Hope tried to reassure her friend, but Anna was still skeptical.
“I just don’t like the idea you’re going to be all the way in California. That’s so far away, Hope, there’s no one out there for you.”
“There’s Jacob. Anyway, I don’t have much here, either. I mean, you’re hands down my best friend, but you can’t be here to help me all the time, and I don’t want to raise this child by myself. They need a father.”
Eventually, Hope managed to sway Anna to her point of view. Although she still didn’t like the idea of her friend being so far away, she did want her to be happy, and if Jacob Ray was going to make Hope happy, Anna supported it.
“You better write to me often, I’m going to get lonely out here all on my own.”
Hope laughed at her friend’s remark. Anna was one of the busiest women in town, always flitting from one friend to the next. But, she promised she would,
“I’ll write to you as soon as I arrive, and every week after. I’ll even send you pictures of the Little One.”
The tone seemed lighter after that, but time still flew by.
Finally, the day came for Hope to leave Virginia, and head out west to California.
She and Anna packed her things and headed to the station, waiting for the train. Hope was nervous, she had heard many things about traveling by train, and she didn’t know what to make of them, but Jake had sent her tickets to ride the train partway, then the stage the rest of the way.
The large locomotive settled to a halt in front of the station, and people milled about.
“I guess this is it then.”
Hope turned to her friend, and both women broke down in tears. Through everything, Anna had been there for Hope more than anyone else she knew, and she hated to leave her here in Virginia. But, there was no way for them to go together, Anna’s husband was established in this town, and it was here she was going to stay.
Hope boarded the train and peered out the window, watching her friend until the train started again. It began slowly at first, then picked up more and more speed until it was chugging away, faster and faster into the unknown.
Hope sat back and closed her eyes. She couldn’t believe she was going so fast. She put her hand on her stomach and smiled.
“You get to ride a train before you are even officially here. Do you know how lucky that is?” She whispered to her belly, wondering if her baby could hear her.
She tried not to think of what was coming next. There were so many things rushing about in her mind, she couldn’t keep them all straight.
Just relax and breathe. In no time at all you are going to be in California, and with Jake. He is going to show you what it really means to be married, and you will be happy at long last.
With those thoughts filling her mind, Hope sat back in her seat and closed her eyes. It wasn’t long before she was fast asleep.
Hope groaned as the stagecoach crawled over another bump. Travelling by horse and wagon was a poor comparison to the luxury of the train, but she couldn’t make it all the way to California by train, so she had to make the switch.
She was glad she was the only one in the stage. Although it made for tedious travel, at least it was quiet. Sleep was impossible, but she could watch out the window at the passing scenery. Everything looked so different out here. Back in Virginia it was flat. Flat and green.
Out here, there were mountains much higher than she ever thought they could go, and trees. So many trees and rocks. It was a real wonder anyone could make a farm out in this land. Hope stifled a cry when they hit another bump. She heard the driver say something, but he was muffled under the noise of the rattling wheels.
Hope didn’t care enough to try to figure out what he said, so she just closed her eyes. It was rocky and bumpy, but the journey was almost over. Tonight she was making her last connection, and she would be in California by noon the next day.
We are so close to so many things! A new husband, a new life, and a new start.
“I promise you, Little One, this is going to be the best thing we have ever done. You are going to be born into a happy family, and life is going to become as it always should have been. I promise.”
Chapter 5 – California State and Mr. Jacob Ray
Hope expected to feel sick with nerves when they finally reached their destination, but when they entered San Francisco, she felt all of her nervousness disappear.
She was glad their farm was outside the city. San Francisco was loud and dirty. There were all kinds of people that looked like they came from all corners of the planet just bustling about, each looking too busy to stop or say anything to anyone around them.
They pulled in front of the post office, and the stagecoach rumbled to a stop. Hope remained seated, waiting for the other 3 passengers to get out, then her turn came.
Once on the ground, Hope suddenly felt very small. All at once she realized she didn’t know anyone for miles around. Sure, she had exchanged letters with Jake Ray, but she still didn’t know him, and the feeling was almost overwhelming.
“S’cuse me, Miss, but are you Hope Cromwell?”
A thick voice behind her startled her and made her whip around. When she saw the speaker, she softened and a smile crossed her pretty face.
“I am, and you must be Mr. Ray?”
“You can call me Jacob… or even better, Jake.”
The man smiled and shook her hand, then took her bags from her. Hope had feared it would be awkward, but she felt entirely natural with him.
That’s probably a good sign.
They walked side by side to the courthouse, and signed the papers. Hope didn’t think it was much of a wedding, they merely recited what the judge told them to recite, and they were on their way. Hope didn’t say anything about it, however, because she wasn’t sure if a mail order wedding was supposed to be anything great.
“Is there a church here?”
She was more trying to break the silence than anything, but was glad when Jake nodded.
“It’s on the edge of town heading toward my place. If you wanna go you won’t gotta come all the way into town to do it.”
“Do you go?”
“Not often.”
Hope let the subject drop, wondering if that would have been a better question to ask before she signed the papers. Jake didn’t seem to be one much for conversation, so she just walked beside him in silence. She wondered where they were going, but didn’t say anything.
Jake finally broke the silence.
“I didn’t know how long the stage was going to be. Sometimes it’s right on time, others it’s not here for hours past when it should be, so the horses on in the stable.”
“Oh! We have horses?”
Hope tried to put a level of enthusiasm in her voice, but Jake just gave her an odd look.
“Of course I have horses. How do you think I get around?”
She didn’t say anything in reply, and the question hung in the air awkwardly. When they reached the stable, Jake pointed to a small wagon in the corner.
“That’s mine, too, you go ahead ‘n sit in it. I’ll
just be a minute.”
Hope crawled into the wagon and smoothed her skirts down around her legs. She thought of how silly Jake must think she is with the way she acted, but tried to shrug it off.
Why does he always make a point to say everything is his? If we’re married, I supposed they’re mine, too.
Oh well, no matter. I don’t want to cause problems, and I don’t think it’s that big of a deal anyway. I’ll be living there same as he is, so it doesn’t really matter who owns what.
She was so absorbed in her thoughts, she didn’t realize the stable boy was talking to her. She jumped when he finally spoke up and broke into her thought.
“Sorry Ma’am, but I don’t think you could hear me. I asked if you might like a cup of tea?”
“Oh, no thank you. I’m just going to wait here for my husband. I’m sure he’ll be along directly.”
She smiled at the lad and chuckled to herself when he ran off, disappointed that he couldn’t run an errand for her.
I’m glad we didn’t have errand boys back home. I would have felt so badly for them I would have given them money just because.
“We’re ready to go! Jest let me pull this forward, and we’ll be off.”
Jake climbed up into the wagon, speaking to her as he did.
“I can’t wait to see the house!”
She placed her hand on his arm, expecting him to return the gesture, but he ignored her. Slapping the reins on the backs of the horses, he shouted for them to get going. Both horses whinnied at the feeling, and threw their weight into the harnesses about their necks.
With that, they were off. Jake drove the horses quickly, not slowing down for anyone in the street. Hope held onto the sides of the seat, trying not to lose her balance as they sped along. She wanted to ask him to slow a bit, but didn’t want to offend so she kept silent.
The ride out to the farm was a pleasant one. Hope loved the scenery once they were out of town and in the countryside. There were a few houses dotting the road along the way, and Jake pointed out who lived in each one.
“I don’t think I’m going to remember all of them!”
Hope said with a laugh, playfully nudging Jake in the ribs.
“That’s ok, they don’t come over unless they need something, and I don’t think you are going to have time to go calling.”
She stopped flirting when he said this, wondering what he meant by that. She put her hand on her stomach as they jolted over another bump, and decided to change the subject.
“I am grateful for what you did for me. I really am.”
Jake said nothing, and nodded.
Hope looked away, scanning the countryside as they rushed along.
I hope I didn’t make a mistake.
Chapter 6 – The Dust Settles
Jacob showed Hope around the place, but Hope couldn’t help but notice he referred to everything as “his” and very few things as “hers”. She wanted to point it out to him once more, but decided against it. He seemed to be on edge, and she didn’t want to start problems the first day she moved in.
There was a stew on the stove, boiling and ready for them when they walked in the door.
“Now that you know yer way around the place, let’s eat.” Jake took off his hat and set it on a hook by the door, then sat down.
“There’s dishes in the cupboard by the washbasin, and you’ll find spoons next to the knives.”
Hope looked at him, surprised that he assumed she was going to serve the dinner. Again, she found it better to hold her tongue, remembering the arguments she used to have with John about things such as this. She took out two bowls and two spoons, and filled both with the stew.
During dinner, Jacob told Hope the daily chores that needed to be done around the place, and what he wanted her to do.
“If I am understanding this correctly, you want me to stay in here and mind the housework, while you are out in the fields?”
“Exactly. I will be in here around one o’clock in the afternoon every afternoon, and I need dinner to be on the table at that time. I’ll see you again at six for supper, and bed is at 9 sharp. I can’t have you drowsy and dragging your feet around here.”
Hope shifted in her seat. She felt awkward and anxious, not wanting to say the wrong thing, but also not liking the sound of the way things were going to be.
“Do you have any questions?”
Jake asked as he took the last of his stew. Hope felt a hundred questions rush to the forefront of her mind, but she shook her head. She knew he didn’t want to debate whether or not she was going to do the work, he wanted to know if she understood what he wanted her to do around the house, and she did.
“Excellent. I will see you at six.”
Jacob rose from his seat and grabbed his hat, then headed outside.
Hope, on the other hand, buried her face in her hands, and took a long breath in and out.
He doesn’t want a wife. He wants a maid! To think of it! Using marriage as a way to not have to pay me or keep me in town! What am I going to do when the baby comes?
Hope sat at the table for a while, letting her thoughts come as they did. She didn’t know what to do, so much had changed for her in the last month. Part of her wanted to go out to the barn and tell Jake he couldn’t leave her with all the work inside, part of her wanted to just cry.
Instead, she took in a deep breath, and stood. Surveying the kitchen, she could see that he left all of the dishes from breakfast in the sink, too. Upon closer inspection it looked as though he had been leaving all the dishes in the sink for the past few days.
He was probably waiting for me to get here to do them.
She scoffed and shook her head, then filled the bucket next to the sink. If there was one thing she already liked about this house, it was the fact there was an indoor pump. Back home in Virginia, she had to haul water from the outdoor pump by the chicken coop, a task that was less than fun in the winter.
It took her an hour to get through the mess in the kitchen, then she turned her attention to the parlor. The whole house was in need of a good dusting. It looked as though it hadn’t been done in weeks, if not months.
No doubt he explained the situation to more than one eligible suitor and she decided against it. Maybe I should have looked into this whole thing better before I signed those darn papers!
Deep down inside, Hope knew complaining wasn’t going to do her any good. She didn’t see how she had a choice, moving was going to happen whether she wanted it to or not, between the baby being on the way and the bank requiring its money from her.
She just wondered if moving out here to California was the best idea she could have had. After all, Anna had told her she could move in and stay with them until the baby came.
Oh Anna! I need to write her and tell her I have arrived safely. She’ll want to know all about Jacob, so I better tell her something that will satisfy her curiosity. If she knew I was here to be the maid she would be on the next train out here to take me home herself!
Hope chuckled to herself, thinking of the fire her friend had, and quickly finished up dusting the parlor. She took off her apron and let her hair fall loosely around her shoulders, then pulled her stationary out of the bag in her room.
I won’t be seeing Jake again until six… he made that more than clear, so I suppose I’ll have enough time to write this letter before I start dinner.
She glanced at the pretty little clock that perched upon a small desk in her room, and realized she only had a couple of hours before it would be time to start dinner. After a moment of debating with herself, she decided to go ahead and write the letter first after all.
I’m not his maid, I’m his wife, and if this is going to be the marriage he said it would be, I am going to have time to do some things I want to do!
With that resolve in her heart, she penned her letter to Anna.
Chapter 7 – Heading Home for Good
The next few weeks passed slowly, and Hope was becoming more and more
unhappy with each passing day. She didn’t like being stuck in the house all day with all of the chores, and with the baby growing ever larger in her belly, it was getting harder to get everything done on time.
Jacob was rarely in the house with her. He came in for meals, but she was often in bed before he was in from outside. As much as she hated it, she was beginning to feel like she was married to John all over again, but the difference was that she had actually loved John at one point.
She could have loved Jacob Ray. She could see it when she spoke with him. There were a lot of things they agreed on, and there were a lot of common things they wanted to do in their lives. Jacob was also attractive, with dark brown eyes and thick black hair, he looked like the mountain men she had read about when she was just a girl.
But then he would leave. And she would be stuck with the chores. Day after day the never ending cycle wore on, and Hope was becoming worn out. She didn’t have time to go outside or enjoy the crisp, late fall air, and she dreaded the fact she would be trapped inside for the winter soon enough.
If I don’t get outside and enjoy it now, I won’t have time to get any fresh air before winter sets in for good. Then my life really will be nothing but work, work, work!
The only thing that brought Hope joy in her life were the letters from her friend. She looked forward to receiving anything from Anna, and was grateful that her friend wrote often. Just as she had covered her problems when she was married to John, Hope did the same with Jake.
In her letters to Anna, she told her how hard they worked to make the place run smoothly, and she told her how she missed spending time with her friend. Hope never asked if anyone had heard from John. She doubted that they had, and she didn’t care even if they did.
Anna’s letters to her were very much the same as the letters Hope sent to Anna. She spoke of the weather and the mutual friends the two girls had in common, and she asked questions. Hope tried to avoid any question her friend asked directly about Jacob, unless it was something that had to do with his health.
[2016] A Bride's Journey Page 2