by Jacobs, Anna
She realized she was blocking the entrance and moved inside. ‘I’m a bit nervous.’
‘Ah, Molly, am I so fearsome?’
‘No. But I don’t want to disappoint you. I’ve only ever been with Craig, you see, and—’
‘Molly, you’re intelligent, fun, attractive, kind. Be proud of what you are.’
‘I wasn’t fishing for compliments.’
‘I wasn’t giving empty praise.’ He looked round. ‘It’s cosy, isn’t it? I’ve always felt good here.’
‘I love it, too. Do you want something to eat?’
‘Not till I’ve kissed you.’
He held out one hand and she took it, letting him pull her gently into his arms, raising her face for his kiss. This was more urgent than the others and she found herself responding, wanting more and forgetting to be shy or nervous, just losing herself in the loving.
Between caresses, they set up the double bed and when they lay down on it together, she felt so at home in his arms, she forgot to be nervous.
Afterwards she sighed with pleasure as they cuddled closely. When he would have switched on the light, however, she protested. ‘I’ve not got a young woman’s body and I never was a sylph.’
‘Who would ever want a scrawny woman when they can have you, Molly Peel? Soft and feminine, so easy to rouse.’ But he didn’t switch the light on, just pulled her close again.
They woke a couple of hours later, laughing at themselves and he admitted he was hungry for food now.
She put on her nightdress, her best one, a silky affair, but had to put an apron over it.
‘Now that is a very elegant look!’ he teased as he put on pyjama bottoms; couldn’t find the top half, so settled for a scruffy old tee shirt.
Together they made omelette and salad, eating it with crusty bread, and then, since he was still hungry, slathering apricot jam on the remaining bread.
‘We’re like that scene in the old Tom Jones movie.’ She licked her fingers slowly.
He chuckled and pulled her hand towards him, licking off a smear of jam and making her gasp.
‘We’re good in bed together,’ he said as he pushed his plate away.
‘Yes. It was great. I was so worried. I’m stupid, aren’t I?’
‘No. You’re normal. Taking a relationship into intimacy is a very important step. I think we both passed with flying colours, don’t you?’ He yawned and then laughed. ‘It may not be romantic but I’m exhausted, Molly, and I’d like nothing better than to sleep.’
‘I’m tired too.’ She fell asleep in his arms, woke in the middle of the night with a start, realized who she was with and smiled in the darkness, snuggling down again.
It felt wonderful not to be alone, even more wonderful that it was Euan lying beside her.
Tuesday was overcast, with rain threatening. It seemed a very suitable day for the funeral of his father, Stuart thought.
The service was short, then he and Wendy stood by his mother’s side at the crematorium as the curtains rolled silently round the coffin before it slid away for ever.
His mother had her head bowed. She’d wept steadily throughout the service, unable to contain her grief. He watched her anxiously, wondering how she’d cope with the gathering of mourners afterwards.
But by the time they arrived at the pub where he’d managed to book a private room, she was more composed. She laid one hand on his arm as she saw him looking at her anxiously. ‘I’ll be all right, darling. It’s a relief to have that part over. Getting through it was hard. Why do we inflict this public ritual on ourselves?’
She greeted the mourners, accepted condolences gracefully and sipped a glass of wine. If she ate very little, he wasn’t going to urge her to take more. He wasn’t feeling particularly hungry himself.
Afterwards, the family went back to his house in a taxi and his mother said, ‘Would you mind if I went home now, darling? I’m exhausted.’
‘Will you be all right? Do you want somebody to stay with you?’
‘I’d rather be on my own. I’ve got the buzzer and security pendant if I need help. That’s going to be such a comfort.’
‘I’ll walk you back, then.’
At the door he gave her a hug and she looked up at him anxiously. ‘You need to weep as well, you know.’
‘Not my style, Ma.’
‘It’s human nature. But have it your own way. Grief will catch you out sooner or later. It always does, even after you think you’ve moved on.’ She stretched up to kiss his cheek. ‘Thank you for all your help, darling.’
As he went back home, he decided to email Molly this very evening about buying her house. It’d be something positive to do.
Brian got a phone call from his sobbing sister and was startled to hear that Jamie had left her. He couldn’t believe the marriage had disintegrated so quickly.
‘Look, I’ll come round to see you after work tonight. No, I can’t take the day off! You can tell me all about it – unless you’ve made it up by then.’
More sobbing, from which he gathered that even their father hadn’t been able to persuade Jamie to come back to her.
‘I have to go to work now but I’ll be round at about six.’
She was still sobbing when he hung up.
He was dreading the visit all day. OK, she was his sister and blood was thicker than water, but they’d never been close and he’d always resented the way their father had favoured her.
When Rachel opened the door of the flat, he was shocked at how dreadful she looked.
She turned and trailed inside, leaving him to close the door.
He was even more shocked when he saw the state of the place. He turned to Rachel, who was sitting on the sofa snivelling into her handkerchief. It never did any good to be kind to her when she got into a state like this, so he said sharply, ‘Stop crying this minute!’
She hiccuped to a halt, staring at him resentfully.
‘I’m not sitting down in this mess. Come on. We’re going to clear the place up.’
‘My life is ruined and you talk about tidying the flat!’
He yanked her to her feet. ‘This place is a health hazard and I’m not going out for takeaway until it’s safe to bring food back.’
He chivvied her into helping him tidy up and she trailed to and fro, following his orders, but not thinking of anything for herself. They had to take two big bags of rubbish out to the bins, and when he saw the pile of dirty washing, he gave her another blast and forced her to put the washing machine on.
‘What’s so hard about pressing a few buttons to get the wash cycle going?’ he demanded. ‘I don’t even have a washing machine. I have to use the one belonging to the block of flats. My place is a near slum, but it’s in a better state than yours.’
‘Why are you living there, then?’
He lost patience totally. ‘Because it’s all I can afford, you fool!’
‘If you’re going to shout at me, you can go away again.’
‘I’m your brother. I’m not going away. But I will shout at you if you act stupid. Grow up! You can’t expect everyone else to look after you.’ Honesty made him add, ‘I was going down the same path myself, but when Mum chucked me out, I had to face a few unpleasant truths. I’m working two jobs now to pay off my credit cards.’
‘Two jobs?’
‘Yes. I thought I’d told you: I’m working as a kitchen hand in the evening at the weekends. And do not give me that scornful look. It’s fun, even if it is rough on the hands, and I get a pile of leftover food as well as my wages.’ He didn’t tell her about the toys. Well, there was nothing to tell yet. ‘Now, get your jacket. We’re going out for some food.’
‘I can’t go out looking like this!’
‘I’ll give you ten minutes to tidy yourself up. Don’t tell me you can’t hide most of that, because you’re good with make-up.’
He was still having to order her around, though. How did you persuade someone to think and act for themselves? Maybe it was t
oo late. Maybe she’d literally been spoiled rotten. He didn’t like to think of that, though. She was his sister, after all.
Rachel insisted on turning her back to the other diners, so they sat in a corner of an Indian restaurant. At first she toyed with her food then started to eat ravenously.
‘You’ve not asked about Mum,’ he said as they waited for their gulab jamun, his favourite dessert.
‘After what she did at my wedding—’
‘She had concussion.’
‘Oh, don’t you start.’
‘She really did have concussion, Rach,’ he said quietly. ‘I’m not lying to you. And even if she hadn’t had the accident, you and Dad treated her shamefully and I let you. I still feel guilty about that.’ He saw that mulish look on her face. ‘Rachel, if you don’t believe me about Mum’s accident, I’m leaving now and never coming back to see you.’
‘But Dad said—’
‘He’d say anything to paint things his way, you know he would. Where is he now? Is he looking after you, inviting you to stay with him? No, he isn’t. I bet he’s blaming not being able to have you on Tasha, too.’
She was silent, then, ‘Mum really did have concussion?’
‘Yes. I swear she did. Quite badly too, because they kept her in hospital overnight.’
‘Oh.’ More silence as she used her fork to rearrange the grains of rice left on her plate. ‘Is she . . . all right now?’
‘Yes. She’s got a job and—’ He remembered in time not to tell her the details.
‘Mum’s got a job? What as? A housekeeper?’
‘Is that the only way you see her?’
‘Well – yes. She’s always stayed home, hasn’t she?’
‘Rotten sort of life she led, too, picking up after you and me, waiting on Dad hand and foot. Then he dumps her for a more up-to-date model.’
‘You never used to take Mum’s side.’
‘I’ve had time to think. I can’t afford a television yet and you can only read so much, then you start thinking.’ And feeling ashamed of yourself.
When they came out of the restaurant, he dragged Rachel into a late-night mini-mart and made her buy some fresh food, then walked her back to the flat.
‘Don’t go,’ she said as she led the way inside. ‘Stay here tonight. I don’t like being alone. I’ve got some wine.’
‘You’ve had enough wine. And I have to go to work tomorrow, which means getting a good night’s sleep and ironing my shirt.’ He moved to the door, then turned and said firmly, ‘I should think pride alone would make you start to get your act together. Or do you consider yourself so useless at the age of twenty-three that you can’t even manage a little washing and cooking? Do you really need looking after like a helpless baby?’
She scowled at him. ‘I hate housework.’
‘Don’t we all?’ A thought occurred to him. ‘Have you been to work since Jamie left?’
‘No. My life’s fallen apart. I can’t cope with working.’
‘How are you going to live, then?’
‘Daddy said he’d help.’
‘He might for a week or two, then what?’
She shrugged.
He suddenly lost patience. ‘You’re a waste of space, Rach.’
She sagged against the door frame, clutching his arm. ‘You will come back to see me, won’t you?’
‘I’ll come to see you at the weekend, but I’m only staying if this place is clean and tidy, and you’re back at work.’
He heard her start sobbing again as he walked away, but hardened his heart. Life was a matter of sink or swim. Once you grew up, you had to learn to swim on your own.
He’d try to help Rach, but he wasn’t going to do everything for her. He was having enough trouble managing his own affairs.
On Wednesday morning Molly found an email from Stuart Benton waiting for her.
Hope things are going well. If you still want to sell your house, I’d love to come and discuss it with you.
Stuart
She read it through again. Sell the house! He must want to live near his mother now that Jane was on her own. She emailed back straight away to say she’d be happy to see him any time and gave him directions, but warned him that she was working most of the weekend.
When she went up to the sales office, Euan was waiting to go out to a series of meetings in London.
‘You look pleased about something, Molly.’
‘I think I’ve just found a buyer for my house.’
‘That’s good news.’
‘Yes. But at the same time it’s so final. I grew up in that house, moved back there after my parents died.’
‘And when it goes, you’ll be rootless.’
She nodded. He seemed to understand such things without her having to spell every detail out for him.
‘You don’t have to sell.’
‘I do. The old Molly lived there. The new one isn’t going back.’
‘But it still hurts?’
When she nodded, he came across to give her a hug.
‘Is it still all right for me to move the rest of my things in this evening? I’ll not be back till nearly eight because I have to go up to London again.’
‘Of course it is, you fool. I’ll have something ready for you to eat.’
‘Just something simple. I’ll be having a big lunch, if I know my friend Don.’
‘I could go across and move the food from the kitchen to the caravan, if you like.’
‘Is there no end to the ways you support me? You don’t have to.’
She looked at him very seriously. ‘I think I was born to be a general factotum.’
He frowned. ‘Not the best term to describe you these days. I think “executive assistant” suits what you do better, because you go way beyond what an average employee would be able to handle.’
She tried it out. ‘Executive assistant. Sounds good. You’re on.’
‘I have to get going now or I’ll be late.’
She was left on her own, so phoned Avril to arrange cover for the lunch break, then sat thinking about her old house. She’d been ready to sell once and Craig had put paid to that. Would he do something to prevent Stuart buying? She’d better warn Stuart. But surely a man like him would be capable of handling Craig?
The next evening Brian rang up and after checking she was all right, said abruptly, ‘I thought you ought to know, Mum. Jamie and Rachel have split up.’
‘What?’ She couldn’t even think for a moment, it was such a shock.
‘Yeah, surprised me, too, after all the fuss she made about the wedding. He left her, says she’s a slob. And she is. I went round to see her and the place was toxic.’
‘What does your father say about that?’
‘Dad spoke to Rachel, then went round to see Jamie, but said there was no moving him. He rang to ask me to keep an eye on my sister, but he’d no need to. I’d already gone round to see her. She is in a mess. If I ever think of getting married, I’ll definitely live with the girl first to make sure we’re compatible.’
She’d never heard him mention marriage before, except as a joke. ‘Are you thinking of getting married?’
‘No. But I’ve met a rather nice girl and she’s agreed to come out with me, so I’m thinking of going steady. I won’t be able to wine and dine her in style, though.’
‘What does that matter?’
He laughed. ‘It doesn’t to her, and as for me, I’m quite a reformed character these days, Mum.’
‘I know. I’m really proud of you.’
When she put the phone down, she was smiling.
Euan came back a little earlier than she’d expected and she had to tell him about her son’s phone call.
‘He’s got two jobs now to pay off his debts. I can’t imagine Brian working as a kitchen hand.’
‘Good for him. What was the bad news?’
‘You read me so easily. Rachel and Jamie have split up.’
‘After only two months? That’s quick
.’
‘Mmm. I’m not going to ring her, though. It’s up to her to contact me. She didn’t even give me a chance to explain at the wedding.’ Her voice wobbled on the last phrase but she blinked away the tears.
His phone rang just then, his older son. Euan was on the line with him for fifteen minutes, smiling and nodding. She couldn’t help overhearing and envied him that ease of communication.
When he put the phone down, he said thoughtfully, ‘I need to tell the boys I’m with you. I think it’ll be better to do that by email. I’m sure they’ll be all right about it once they’ve met you. We’ve talked about the possibility of me finding someone else, and they’re all right with the idea in theory, but they were fond of their mother, so it’s best to tread gently.’
‘I like the way you all loved her so much. I hope someone remembers me as kindly.’
He gave her hand a quick squeeze. ‘They will.’
‘I need to tell Brian about us as well. I was too shocked by the news about Rachel to do it today. And you’re right. Email will be better, so that I can think carefully about exactly what I want to say.’
‘It’s complicated, isn’t it, going into a second relationship?’
‘Is this a relationship?’
He didn’t hesitate. ‘It’s the beginning of one and I hope it goes further.’
‘Living with you isn’t complicated, Euan. I’m surprised at how easy you are to be with, even in such cramped conditions.’ She didn’t say the obvious, that Craig had never been easy. She was trying not to mention him at all.
‘If we can manage to rub along together in our present circumstances, I reckon we can manage anywhere.’
His eyes held a promise, but he didn’t speak that promise aloud, and she didn’t want him to – yet.
A little later, she sighed and said, ‘I can’t help worrying about Rachel. I don’t know whether she’ll be able to cope on her own. But if I pick up the pieces yet again, she’ll never learn, will she? I used to threaten all sorts of things, but in the end I gave in and cleared her room up every now and then, because it was a health hazard. And she refused point blank to learn to cook. You should have seen the messes she brought home from school. She spoiled them deliberately. Her father laughed but I hated the waste.’