by Blair Grey
Mia shook her head. “I can’t imagine that you’ll ever lose him,” she said. But then, she frowned. “I guess I never thought I’d lose my sister, either, though.”
I blinked over at her in surprise. “I didn’t know that you had a sister,” I said. Hadn’t she told me that she didn’t have any family?
Mia looked away from me. “You remember those photos you saw at my house? The girl that I said was a friend of mine? Maggie. She was my sister.”
“Oh wow,” I said, barely believing it. “Does she live in Las Cruces?” I didn’t think I had ever seen her around Sunshine before, which seemed strange given the amount of time that Mia spent there. But hang on, had she said that Maggie was her sister? And that she’d lost her? “What happened?” I asked quietly.
Mia sighed and shrugged. “She died.” She paused and then looked back at me. “Like I said, you could have it worse. You might not get to see Landon every day, but at least you still get to see him. And call him.”
I couldn’t help but look at Mia in a whole new light. She usually seemed so upbeat and happy that I couldn’t imagine something so tragic having happened to her. And in some of the photos, they’d both seemed like they were older. Maggie couldn’t have died too long ago.
I wondered what had happened, but I could tell how hard it was for Mia to talk about her sister still, and I didn’t want to press. I felt honored that she had even told me anything about the other woman. She didn’t have to. I couldn’t help feeling glad that she had told me. That she trusted me enough to tell me about it.
I pulled her even closer to me. “I’m sorry about your sister,” I told her quietly. It didn’t feel adequate, just saying that, but I didn’t know what else to do.
Mia smiled sadly up at me, though, turning her cheek to rest against my chest, and I felt like I had said the right thing.
24
Mia
Coming to the beach had definitely been the right choice for today. Not that holing up in the hotel suite for the day with Braxton would have been a terrible idea, but I liked that we were out and doing things. Enjoying each other’s company outside of the bedroom. I felt comfortable with him, and I was having fun. I wasn’t worrying about Darren or about anything back home. I was just having a good little vacation with him.
It was all Braxton’s doing too. I could have been on my own for this trip. But he had gone out of his way to bring me here, to look out for me, to protect me. He had introduced me to his brother at dinner last night, and we’d had a good time. It was just so easy, being with him. This was never meant to be a relationship, but I was starting to realize how dangerously close I was to falling in love with him.
I didn’t think I’d ever been with a good guy before. Not someone like this. There had been far too many “Darrens.” More than I’d like to admit. I knew that I couldn’t date Braxton. I just wasn’t ready to give myself over to someone again, not even someone like Braxton who was so kind to me.
I had never told anyone about Maggie before. We had never been as close as Landon and Braxton were, but we had definitely been good friends. We’d grown up together after all. Losing her, knowing that I would never talk to her again, that I would never hear her laugh again? That had been tough. It had taken me a long time to work through that. And it had left clear marks on who I was as a person.
But they were the kind of marks that no one ever saw. I never told anyone, not even Darren, about Maggie. I just never liked to talk about her.
Things were different with Braxton, though. I wanted him to know. I could tell that he would understand what I had gone through and that he wouldn’t just pity me.
There was more to Maggie’s story than what I told him of course. Everything leading up to the “accident” and everything after the accident. Watching her slip away and knowing that there was nothing that I could do about it. It had taken a long time before I had gotten any sort of confidence back. It had taken a long time to put myself back together once she was gone.
But I didn’t want to get into all of that now. Maybe one day I would. Maybe one day, I’d tell Braxton everything. For now, this was enough.
This wasn’t a relationship, what Braxton and I had. It could never be a relationship. But maybe we could build a solid friendship over time. One with benefits, maybe, but one that at heart was mostly about our friendship. One where we talked about things like missing our siblings in addition to the lighter subjects in our lives.
But for now, I was just happy with what we had. I felt comfortable around him. And it was nice to be close to him. Although right now, I might be too close to him. “Man, it’s warm today,” I said finally, moving out from under Braxton’s arm.
Braxton laughed. “I thought you were just complaining about being too cold,” he said.
“Well, that was before I sat in the sun for a few minutes,” I said, squinting up at the sky. “It’s getting more humid, too, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, definitely,” Braxton agreed. “I wonder if it’s going to storm this afternoon.”
“Probably,” I said. That was definitely how it felt anyway. But then again, maybe it was just the change in humidity from Las Cruces to Sarasota that we were unused to.
“I know,” Braxton said, snapping his fingers. “Why don’t we go to this ice cream shop that I found last time I was here? It’s this retro, old-school kind of place. You know, vinyl and chrome, all of that. They do amazing banana splits.”
I laughed. “Sounds like a great idea,” I told him. I shook my head, still grinning.
“What?” Braxton asked, narrowing his eyes at me. “I can’t help thinking that you’re laughing at me.”
“I’m just amused. You’re not what I would think of as the stereotypical biker dude.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Braxton asked, looking surprised to hear me say that.
I shrugged, smirking at him. “Just that I’m pretty sure that underneath that burly exterior, you’re a big softy.”
Braxton laughed and shook his head. “I just like ice cream. What’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing,” I said, widening my eyes innocently. “Nothing at all.”
We went for ice cream, and the place was just as awesome as Braxton had promised it would be. But not only was the ice cream good, but it was also just nice getting to spend more time with Braxton like this. We might not have tons in common beyond the whole sibling thing, but somehow, we never seemed to run out of things to talk about. It was relaxing and comfortable being with him. By the time we were done sharing a banana split with all the fixings, I had a huge smile on my face that I couldn’t seem to wipe away.
I waited by the door, watching as Braxton paid. I tried to remind myself that this hadn’t been a date. We weren’t in a relationship. I didn’t know why I had to keep reminding myself of that. Did I want something different?
I thought back to my thoughts on the beach. I liked Braxton. That was for sure. I was starting to realize how easy it would be to fall in love with him if I would only let myself. But no, I knew better than to let myself. Things couldn’t work out between us in the end. There was already too much drama, and I wasn’t looking for a relationship. Neither was Braxton, from what I could tell.
Besides, I needed to remember who he was. When he wasn’t here in Sarasota, he wasn’t this relaxed. He was a member of the most powerful MC in all of New Mexico. He was dangerous. Not that I thought he would ever hurt me, but it was the kind of stuff that I knew better than to get caught up in.
We were friends, nothing more. That was all that we would ever be. I had to be okay with that.
I was okay with that. It must just be the heat that was getting to me. My brains were turning to mush.
Someone wolf-whistled at me from my right-hand side, and I turned to look. The guy was decently attractive, I supposed, with dark hair and tanned skin, his blue eyes piercing. But he wasn’t my type.
I apparently was his, though. “Look at you, girl,” he s
aid, his eyes roving over my body, and I suddenly felt self-conscious in my bathing suit and flimsy cover-up. Like I was showing off too much skin, even though my cover-up was pretty modest.
I turned my gaze away from him. “Sorry, but I’m not interested,” I said.
The man laughed, teeth flashing white against his tan skin. “I haven’t even asked you out yet; how do you know that you’re not interested?” he asked.
“Because I don’t want to go out with you,” I said simply, hoping he would just get the idea and leave me alone. But it seemed I wasn’t that lucky.
He took a step closer, opening his mouth to say something else. But just then, an arm dropped protectively around my shoulders. “Something wrong here?” Braxton asked easily, looking back and forth between me and the newcomer.
The guy frowned. “This your girlfriend?” he asked, looking back and forth between the two of us.
“She is,” Braxton said, his voice low and dangerous. His arm tightened around my shoulders, almost as though he was staking a claim on me.
“Whoa, okay. Sorry man, I didn’t know,” the other guy said, holding up both hands and backing off.
Braxton steered me out of the ice cream parlor. I waited until we were outside before bursting out laughing at the man’s expression. Braxton cracked a smile as well. “Some guys just think they can have whatever they want,” he said.
“Oh come on,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Don’t act like you’re so different. I’ve seen you at the bar. You pick up different women all the time.”
“There’s a difference, though,” Braxton said. “I don’t approach them. I let them come to me.” He winked, and I laughed.
“You’re terrible,” I said, shaking my head. Then, I bumped my shoulder against his. “So I’m your girlfriend now, am I? Guess you’d better not still be sleeping around.”
Braxton groaned. “I was just trying to get the guy to back off. That seemed like the easiest way,” he said.
I put a hand over my heart. “Are you saying that I’m not good enough to be your girlfriend?” I asked. But I couldn’t help giggling even as I said it.
We were back at the hotel by now, riding the elevator up to the penthouse. Braxton backed me up against the wall, his lips finding the shell of my ear. “There’s a reason I can’t keep my hands off you, you know,” he said, and I couldn’t help but shiver at the way his breath breezed across my sensitive neck.
He pulled away, smirking at me. I shook my head. “Incorrigible,” I said.
Braxton shrugged easily, making a show of looking at his watch. “For the sake of keeping our strength up, maybe we should take a nap,” he suggested.
As if on cue, I yawned. “Yeah, I could go for that,” I said. “I think I got a little too much sun.”
We headed into the room and fell into bed together. Braxton snaked an arm around my body, drawing me close to him. It was sweet, lying there next to him, our bodies pressed together, our breathing practically in sync. I couldn’t help thinking back to what he had said at the ice cream parlor when that guy had been hitting on me though.
That I was his girlfriend.
For a moment, I let myself imagine it. But I knew that that wasn’t what I wanted. That wasn’t what either of us wanted. I lifted my head to look at Braxton.
“What’s up?” he asked, brushing back my hair and tucking it behind my ear, his fingers lingering there.
I shook my head. “Look, I appreciate what you did, looking out for me with that dude. But you know I can’t really be your girlfriend, right?”
Braxton frowned at me, and I could tell that there was a question there. He wanted to know why I couldn’t be his girlfriend. I didn’t know how to explain it to him. It sounded so depressing to admit that people just never stayed in my life. My family. Maggie. Or boyfriends.
I was scared, to be honest. Either I’d fall in love with him and lose him like I had lost Maggie, or else things would go the same way that my relationships always did. Because things never started out terrible. Even Darren and I had hit it off like crazy at the start. And then I had caught him cheating on me, and we had broken up, and now I had to deal with all of this. Broken windows and an impromptu trip to the other end of the country just to get away from him.
I wanted to believe that that would never happen with Braxton. That things would just get better and better. But I wasn’t willing to risk it. Things just didn’t work out that way for me.
It sounded incredibly self-deprecating. And anyway, I didn’t want to talk about it with Braxton. I was worried that he might convince me that things were going to be different with him and that I didn’t need to be afraid. That we would work out in the end.
And I was afraid that once we had that conversation, once he convinced me, I would find myself in a real relationship with him. And then I would just get my heart broken. No, I wasn’t going to risk it.
Not only that, but I wasn’t being entirely honest with him at the moment. He didn’t know that Darren was probably the one who had broken that window. He didn’t know that I had this crazy, stalker ex-boyfriend and most likely that was why I had to come here to Florida. Until I could be honest with him about that, I couldn’t possibly get into a relationship with Braxton.
So I turned away from his questioning gaze, rolling over so that my back was to him. I held my breath, wondering what he would do. Wondering if he would still ask whatever it was that he meant to ask. Instead, he gave a soft sigh, his hand coming out to rest on my hip as he curled his body around mine. He pressed his lips against the nape of my neck, a soft and fleeting touch, almost tender even.
But when he spoke, it wasn’t to convince me that we should be in a relationship. It wasn’t even to ask why we couldn’t be in a relationship. Instead, he spoke one single word, quietly: “Okay.”
And that made me feel even worse, like I was the one hurting him instead of the other way around as I feared might happen.
25
Braxton
I woke up early on Saturday, but I felt refreshed. Relaxed. Content in a way that I had never felt before. I smiled over at Mia, running a hand down her spine. She was sprawled out on her belly, her limbs akimbo, her hair pulled back in a messy bun. Somehow, she was beautiful like this. So totally unassuming and beautiful. I didn’t know how to describe what I felt for her at that moment, but I knew it was dangerously far beyond the line of “just friends.”
I didn’t know why she kept insisting that we couldn’t be more than friends. And I wanted to press her on it. To point out that we basically already acted like boyfriend and girlfriend. That there was nothing to be afraid of because I wasn’t going to hurt her.
But I didn’t think forcing the issue would make her feel any more comfortable around me, and to be honest, I was getting more and more worried that she was going to pull away and that I was going to lose her for good.
I grabbed my phone off the nightstand, flicking through my notifications. I had a text from Landon, and I quickly opened it. Breakfast?
I checked when the message had been sent, and it wasn’t that long ago. I grinned. Definitely, I texted back. Then, I got out of bed and started getting dressed.
Mia still hadn’t stirred by the time I was ready to go, and I could tell she probably needed her sleep. I didn’t know what was going on in that head of hers, but she’d been tossing and turning for half the night, which was unusual for her. I wondered if it had anything to do with what she had told me about her sister. Maybe she couldn’t stop thinking about her now. Maybe she was reliving that chapter in her life.
I hated to think that I had brought up these bad memories for her, but I had a feeling that she was thinking about her sister because she had seen me together with Landon. It was probably better that I let her sleep, and it was probably better that I cool it with the sibling stuff for now. I scrawled a quick note on the hotel stationery, propping it up on the bedside table where she would see it when she woke up. Then, I slipped out and headed for the
restaurant that Landon had picked.
He was already sitting at a table by the window when I arrived, and I slid in across from him. “No better half?” Landon joked.
I snorted. “Same for you too,” I pointed out. “What, did Anne get sick of you finally?”
Landon laughed. “Nah, she had to work. Where’s Mia?”
“She’s still asleep. Guess I wore her out yesterday.” I smirked at Landon, and he rolled his eyes.
“I so do not need to know the details,” he said. “I’m glad to see you’ve got someone who makes you happy.” He paused, though I could tell he was trying to think of a way to phrase whatever it was that he wanted to say.
“Come on, just spit it out,” I said, rolling my eyes. We were brothers. It wasn’t like whatever he said was going to make me storm out of there.
“I remember Mia from before,” Landon finally said. He paused. “Do you know why Ray wanted her out of town?”
I shrugged. “Like I said, there was an incident. Broken window. That’s all I know.”
“But why not have you protect her there?” Landon pressed. “With you over here, there’s no way for you to deal with whoever it was that broke her window. And I know he’s had you paired up with Grant, but Grant’s definitely not had enough training to be able to take down some dude all on his own.”
“Right,” I said. “But maybe if Mia’s out of town, this whole thing will just blow over.” I frowned at him. “What are you so worried about anyway?”
Landon shook his head. “I was just thinking. There was that guy that used to hang around the bar. The guy who was her boyfriend for a while. He always seemed like a pretty rough-around-the-edges kind of dude. You don’t think he has anything to do with this, do you?”