by Sable Hunter
“You’re wrong, Shane. I don’t deny that I did those things in the beginning, but what I feel for you is different than what I felt for Mary.”
Shane laughed, a sad resigned sound. “Yes, different. You loved Mary, for some unknown reason, you lusted after me. Mary meant everything to you, I mean nothing.”
“That’s not true. I want to be with you. Only you.”
She held up her hand, her eyes taking in his dear form. Hearing those words now, after having longed for them for so long, hurt worse than not hearing them at all. “Please don’t say that, Brodie. You don’t mean it.” At the stubborn set of his jaw, she smiled. “I forgive you. I never doubted for one moment that you’re a good man. So, let’s wipe the slate clean between us. No hard feelings. We’ll share a child and have a mutual respect for one another. But the very best thing we can do for one another, is to go our separate ways.”
“I don’t agree, Shane. You love me.” He leaned over her, his hand next to her pillow. “Sawyer told me he heard you say it. He said you kissed me – after I was so cruel to you, you still cared enough to come visit me, to sit with me, more than once. Don’t you see? We both survived because we’re supposed to be together.”
By this time Shane was shaking. She was upset. She was confused. And she was hurting so much she couldn’t bear it another second. “Call the nurse, I’m sick.”
Trying to calm down, Brodie could see she was hurting. “God, I’m sorry.” He felt like a fool. “Let me get you some help.” He grabbed the call button. “Ms. Wilder needs help.” After letting it go, he asked, “how long has it been since you had something for the pain?”
Shane began to cry. “I wouldn’t take it. I didn’t want to hurt the baby.”
She began to sob and Brodie couldn’t stand it, he covered her, putting an arm around her good shoulder, lying his head against hers. “Please sweetheart, take something. I can’t stand to see you hurting. The doctor wouldn’t give you anything that would hurt our baby.”
Shane just let the tears come. She was so tired. “Okay. Could you go, Brodie? I can’t do this anymore tonight.”
When the nurse came in, Brodie backed up. “She said she’ll take something for the pain now.”
The nurse pinned him with a glare. “Did you upset her?”
Shane didn’t say anything, so Brodie relented. “I’ll go and let her rest. I didn’t mean to upset her.” He addressed the next comment to Shane. “I’ll go, but this isn’t over. I’m not giving up. I want you and our baby in my life. I’ll do anything in my power to convince you that I’m telling the truth.”
Once he was gone, Shane collapsed against the pillow. Exhausted. The shot the nurse gave her took effect quickly. She escaped into sleep, happy to welcome oblivion.
When she awoke, groggy and out of it, Shane had to wonder if Brodie’s visit really happened or if it was a dream. Her uncertainty was cleared up when a huge bouquet of red roses arrived later in the morning. The card read: I can’t stop thinking about you. Please feel better. See you soon. Love, Brodie.
The roses were beautiful. Shane’s heart swelled when she looked at them. She appreciated Brodie’s attempt to reach out to her, but she knew he was still reeling from the similarities of her situation to Mary’s.
“Oh, wow,” one of her younger nurses exclaimed, “you have yourself one serious admirer. Was it that hunk I saw here yesterday?”
Shane started to shrug, then winced. “We used to work together.”
“Honey, I think this fella likes you.”
A wave of wistfulness made her weak. “He’s going to make some woman very happy, I’m just not that woman.”
The nurse made a harrumphing noise as she made her way out of the room, clearly not agreeing with Shane’s assessment.
As the day progressed, Shane remembered why she hated hospitals. After a lengthy discussion with her doctor, they came to the agreement that if she took a low-dose pain pill, she could recuperate at home. “You’re going to have a scar. Later, you might consider plastic surgery.”
Shane didn’t respond. The scar on her body would heal before the scars on her heart. Her faith in herself was at its lowest point.
A slight tap on the door announced she had a visitor. For a moment, she thought it might be Brodie and an undeniable thrill shot through her, so intense, her breath hitched in her throat. “Come in.”
But it wasn’t Brodie, it was Libby and Jessie McCoy, pushing the wheelchair of a very concerned Aunt Bess.
“Why didn’t you call me?”
Libby patted Bess’s shoulder. “She saw it on the news.”
Shane was horrified. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t even think of that.”
“We do have cable in the nursing home, you know.” Bess was reaching for the bed, trying to pull forward.
Jessie helped her. “She called the ranch bright and early this morning. We dropped everything to go after her.”
“Aunt Bess, I’m fine. Please forgive me.” Shane did her best to hug her. “I do have good news.”
“I could use some good news.” Bess accepted a tissue Libby passed to her.
Shane let her glance pass from one woman to the next. “I’m going to have a baby.”
“Oh!” Bess cried out, throwing her hands in the air, looking more like Aunt Bea from Mayberry than she ever had before. “How wonderful!”
Libby and Jessie were also all smiles. “Congratulations, Shane!” they both exclaimed simultaneously.
Touching the velvety petals of one of the roses, Bess beamed. “I suppose these are from the father? Brodie Walton, I presume?”
“Yes, but we’re not together anymore.” Seeing her aunt’s obvious distress, Shane quickly added a comment meant to reassure her. “It’s okay, I’m going to be fine. I have a plan.”
Aunt Bess gave her a pointed stare. “You’d better have a plan or I’ll be moving in with you so fast your head will swim. I might be in this wheelchair, but I can certainly still take care of a baby.”
All three of the younger women couldn’t help but laugh.
“I don’t doubt you for a minute.” Libby patted her shoulder.
“I don’t either and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.” Shane looked at her aunt with love.
“When are you going home?” Jessie asked. “Do you know yet?”
“He didn’t say for sure, I’m hoping they’ll release me today. If not, tomorrow for sure.”
After promising that she’d call Tebow when she found out her release, the trio of well-wishers left Shane to rest. She felt better, knowing she had someone on whom she could depend.
Later on that afternoon, the doctor came to give her one final checkup.
“Are you releasing me?”
The doctor let out a long breath. “Yes. I’m sending you home with a prescription of pain pills. Are you going to be all right? Do you have anyone to drive you home and be with you?”
“Yes. She does.” Brodie’s voice took both the doctor and Shane by surprise.
“Perfect.” The doctor said, standing. “I’ll get the papers ready.” He shook Brodie’s hand. Neither man was paying a bit of attention to Shane.
“You aren’t taking me home.” She protested with insistence, her eyes widening at the huge balloon bouquet he held in one hand.
Brodie gave her a big smile. “You look better. I’m glad.” To her consternation, he leaned over and kissed her cheek. “I’m not taking you to my home, not yet. But I am taking you to yours.” Without giving her a chance to protest, he glanced around the room. “I’ll start gathering your things.”
Shane tried to sit up straighter in the bed. In the process of scooting up, she jarred her shoulder. “Ow!”
Brodie placed some of her things in a small pile on a chair. “Shane, be careful. You’re going to pull your stitches loose.”
Shane sputtered. “I distinctly remember you telling me to stay out of your sight. Why should I listen to you?”
“Because I said
so,” he stated unequivocally.
“I used to think you saying that was sexy.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “I don’t think so anymore.”
Brodie grinned. “You still think I’m sexy.” He pointed at her gown. “Your sweet nipples are saluting me right now.”
Shane growled, cursing the thin hospital gown. Folding her good arm over her chest, she fussed. “These aren’t for you. They keep these rooms too cold.”
“Yea, I believe you.” He winked at her while he continued to pack the small suitcase Everly Cross, Maverick’s wife, had so generously brought her. Shane hated that she hadn’t been awake to meet her. She intended to remedy that as soon as possible.
“No, seriously, Brodie.” Shane continued to argue with him. “There’s absolutely no need for you to worry about me. The McCoy’s have offered to take care of me. A few of the guys at work have offered…”
Brodie faced her, one hand on his hip. “No.” He pointed at her middle. “You and that baby are my responsibility and I want to take care of you.”
After several more minutes of back and forth, Shane gave up. She was just too tired to keep up with him. “Fine. But don’t assume that this means anything and thank you for the balloons.”
“That’s my girl.”
His smile and coy comeback just pissed her off some more.
Shane was still grumbling as she was wheeled out of the hospital. When it came time to climb into his truck, she looked at the high step with dismay. She needn’t have worried, Brodie swept her up and into the seat before she could tell him not to.
“There.” He leaned across her and fastened the seat belt, giving her a quick kiss as he straightened up.
Once he was in the driver’s seat and pulling out of the hospital, she leaned her head back and sighed. “We need to have a long talk.”
Brodie cut his eyes toward her. “I think I’ve been advocating that possibility for a while now.”
“You’re using your supervisor tone, Brodie. I don’t work for you anymore.”
“All of my tones sound alike, I’ve never pretended to be anything but what I am. Which way?”
“Hit 360 and go north. I live by the bridge, Nalle Woods, #402.” Taking the time to count to ten, she organized her thoughts. “You’re pretending now, Brodie. I wasn’t what you wanted at the beginning and I’m not what you want now and pretending otherwise doesn’t make it true.”
“Who’s pretending?” Brodie thumped his thumb on the steering wheel, keeping his eyes straight ahead as he merged into traffic. He could see that he had his work cut out for him. “The cliffs, I like them, it’s pretty here.” The beauty of the Texas Hill Country was never more evident as he made his way toward the Colorado River, descending down the steep white cliffs between the rolling green hills peppered with stately homes. “You live in a nice part of town.”
“I live in an apartment, a one-bedroom apartment.”
“Don’t worry, I don’t take up much room.”
Shane snorted. “You’re so big, you deserve your own zip code!”
Brodie laughed. “I thank you and my cock thanks you.”
“Arg!”
“I love your pirate impression as much as I love your booty.”
“Stop it!” She hissed at him, but he didn’t seem to be deterred. “All I want you to do is drop me off so I can take a pain pill and go to sleep.” Hearing him almost say that he loved her hurt far more than the bullet wound.
He didn’t say anything more, so Shane took his silence as agreement.
She was wrong.
After he got her into her apartment, he made sure Shane took her pill. After that, she kept trying to herd him out the door, but the big man didn’t herd very well. Every time she had him near the door, he somehow escaped. Finally, she gave up, too tired to care. “Just show yourself out, Brody. I’m going to take a nap.”
“Good. You need one.”
“Lock the door as you leave.” She trundled off to bed.
“I will.”
She took him at his word, only he didn’t tell her when he was leaving.
* * *
“Wake up, sleepy head. I made you soup.”
Shane licked her lips. Her mouth was so dry. It took a second or two for her brain to engage, and when it did, she opened one eye. “You aren’t still here, are you, Brodie?”
“No, I left a few hours ago.”
She opened the second eye, wondering if the pain pills had stolen her good sense.
“Then why am I seeing you? Am I hallucinating?”
“No.” He sat a breakfast-in-bed table over her mid-section. “I came back.” He gave her a devastating, panty-wetting smile. “Bearing gifts.”
If she hadn’t been so hungry and the soup hadn’t smelled so good, Shane might have argued further. “Let me fortify myself,” she shook her spoon at him, “then I’ll feel more like arguing.”
He pulled a chair up next to the bed. “I intend to let you win every argument.” When she looked at him with a satisfied gleam in her eye, he amended. “Except the one where you try to cull me out of your life again.”
After three bites, she had the energy to point out the obvious. “Are you forgetting that you’re the one who culled me out of your life?”
His smile dropped and his face grew serious. “I have never been more wrong about anything in my life. I want to turn back time and have you tell me again that you’re going to have my baby.” He went to his knees next to the bed. “Say it again, give me another chance to tell you how I feel.”
Shane felt a rising tide of terrified hope rise within her. How easy it would be to just give in and take Brodie at his word. “I can’t,” she told him sorrowfully. “I don’t trust you. I can’t reconcile this sudden seismic shift in your attitude. You told me how you’d never care anything about me, that you’d already experienced the love of your life. As upset as you were over the news of our baby, I can believe you’ve changed your mind about our child. What I can’t believe is that you’ve changed your mind about me.” When he started to speak, she held up both hands. “Let me finish, please, Brodie.” When he pressed his lips together, she spoke, “I am the same person, no more attractive or desirable than I was at the beginning.”
“You are perfect,” he stated baldly.
She frowned at him. “Don’t you see? You have it all. You’ve got full and welcome access to your child, plus a newfound desire to lay aside the past and find someone who can make you happy. I am thrilled that you’re ready to start your life anew.” She paused and took a deep breath. “I just know it won’t be with me.”
Brodie held out his hands. “I don’t know what to say that will make you believe and understand that you are who I want. You’re the only one I want in my life.”
Shane moved the tray from over her and carefully sat it aside. “I thank you so much for everything you’ve done today. If you don’t mind, I’d like for you to go.”
Bowing his head, Brodie nodded. “All right. I’ll go, for now.” When Shane said no more, he rose. “I’m not giving up, Shane.” He bent over the bed and framed one side of her face with a big hand. “I’ll convince you that we belong together, if it’s the last thing I ever do.” With a tender kiss, he left her sitting there, grasping onto the bed covers with both hands. If she hadn’t been holding on so tight, she would’ve grabbed onto him and never let him go.
* * *
Buzz! Buzz!
Shane reached over to slap her alarm, only to realize it was her phone.
“Um, um, um,” she moaned, when she twisted the wrong way. “Hurts like a bitch!” she whispered, hitting the button to answer the phone.
“What?”
“Morning, sunshine. How are you feeling today?”
Brodie.
“With my fingers.”
He chuckled. “You rest today. I’ll be over to see you after work.”
“No!” she cried, only to discover that he’d already hung up.
“Why me?”
she moaned, dragging herself to her feet. After she had a shower and ate some toast, Shane was feeling better. Chief Olsen called to check on her and she told him that she thought she could begin light duty in a week.”
“No lifting. No carrying.”
“No, unfortunately, I’m still functioning with one arm.”
“I’ll be glad to switch places with you for a while.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “I hate paperwork.” He went on to tell her that he’d talked to Aunt Bess. No one had to tell Shane that she’d hit the jackpot with bosses this go around. The moment she entertained the thought, she felt guilty. Chief Gray was a doll. Supervisor Brodie was…
A pain in her ass.
He showed up at six-thirty with an armful of snacks and an Amazon Firestick so they could watch movies. “I noticed yesterday that you didn’t have a player of any kind, nor have you subscribed to any movie channels.” He waved the flash drive sized device in front of her face. “This way, I can introduce you to the wonders of American Horror Story.”
“Scaring me is not going to do anyone any good.”
He gave her a knowing smirk. “Worked last time.”
Shane blushed. She didn’t need to be reminded of their carriage ride, and considering how he acted afterward, she was surprised he brought it up. “Look, you realize this is unnecessary.”
Brodie unpacked his bags of goodies. “It’s necessary for me. Cheetos?”
He handed Shane her favorite snack, then laughed when she snatched it out of his hand.
“No one can say I don’t know how to deal with women.”
She felt a bit of a pang at his comment. Like any woman, Shane longed to be courted by a man intent on winning her hand. Oh well, until her Prince Charming came along, she’d take the Cheetos.
When she settled on the couch, he came to stand next to her. “Scoot down a cushion.”
“Why, and don’t say ‘because I said so’!”
“Because I want to hold your hand while we watch the show and your other hand is connected to your sore shoulder.”
“Oh.” Shane started to argue that she didn’t want him to hold her hand, but that would’ve been a lie. After coming so close to the Pearly Gates, she decided not to add to her list of sins.