by Mary Ting
That night, as I lay in bed thinking idly about angels, I thought about what they would look like. What was their purpose? Did they really exist? As I pondered these questions, I started singing, “Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high, there’s a land that I heard of, once in a lullaby…” Unable to finish, I drifted off to sleep.
Chapter 3
I was back on the same dirt road, only this time I wasn’t running. Oddly, everything looked familiar. Feeling a bit anxious, wondering if she would appear again, I began to walk cautiously. I was wondering why I was here again. Is it possible to dream about the same place? While contemplating this question, I tried to find an opening through the field. Using my hands as tools, I pushed and shoved every which way that would allow me to break through the blades of grass. No matter how much I pushed, all I could see was a vast wall of grassland. Feeling defeated, I thought I would try one last time. That’s when he appeared.
“Don’t you ever give up?” he said in the most hypnotic voice, appearing to be slightly amused by my efforts.
“Umm…,” I said, stunned to see a face looking back at me. I stared at the most perfect, glorious face. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. As his eyes pierced into mine, he stepped in my direction. I had no other choice but to walk backward, feeling intimidated, yet compliant of his authority. I wanted to look away, but I was deeply lost in his eyes. My heart was pounding, wondering what this guy could be doing in my dream.
He certainly fit the description of how I had envisioned the man of my dreams. He was at least six feet tall, with dark brown hair and deep warm brown eyes that were so inviting. He was lean and extraordinarily muscular, and his skin appeared to be made of satin. My heart was melting. It felt sinful admiring him this way. I wondered if he could hear my thoughts or feel my heart racing as he stared back at me. I began to feel my face become warm with embarrassment at the thought. Time seemed to stop as we stared into each other’s eyes. No need for words, just alone in each other’s thoughts. How I wondered what his were!
The tension broke when he spoke to me again. “What are you doing here? Do you want to be sent back like before?”
Hearing his velvety voice again gave me goose bumps all over my body. Send me back like before? I repeated his question in my head. I was confused. Then it dawned on me; it was his voice I had heard in my last dream. Although I felt frustrated and angered by his comments, I needed to stay calm.
“First of all, who are you? And what are you doing in my dream?” I tried to sound composed.
“Your dream? You think this is a dream? Think again,” he said with a condescending tone.
Confusion began to fill my head, and I was angered again by his unfriendly remark. I wanted to yell at him for being so rude, but all I could do was stare at his stunning face. He was so attractive that I couldn’t stop staring. Then he said, “Can’t think fast enough? The answer is not on my face.”
I looked away quickly and dropped my jaw. I couldn’t believe he had just said that to me. My face flushed with embarrassment and anger. Was it that obvious that I was staring at him? I had to think fast and say something intelligent, but I was so infuriated that I couldn’t think of anything to say. I calmed myself and looked at him again to speak, “I am dreaming, and you are not real.”
“I’m real. There is no doubt about that. And you may think you are dreaming, but you are actually at the Crossroads, somewhere between Heaven and Earth, or between life and death, whichever you prefer.”
He was so matter of fact, like he was telling somebody for the hundredth time. But his words were significant. I felt a chill run up my spine. Who was he trying to scare? How dare he lie to me!
“That’s not true!” I began to argue. “There is no such thing, and this is my dream…perhaps a nightmare after meeting you!”
Apparently that was not the response he had anticipated. His cold stare was enough to make me wish I could take it back. “I see; perhaps I’ll just disappear.”
“No! Please! Wait! Don’t go. I don’t understand what is happening. Could you at least tell me how I got here?”
He arched his brows. “If you don’t know, how am I supposed to know?”
“Well, I thought…I thought because you seem to live here?” I was hesitant to say those words because I wasn’t sure.
“Don’t assume anything!” he said sharply.
I was perplexed by his coldness. What a jerk! I didn’t want to talk to him anymore, but I needed answers. “Is there anyone else I can talk to that may give me some answers? Perhaps someone…nicer?” Now I was being rude, but he had been rude to me first.
He hesitated to answer, looked away, and responded sternly, “No. There is no one else here.”
“Really?” I fired back, vaguely remembering the lady I saw the last time I dreamt about this place. “You’re telling me that you are the only one who lives here or…or whatever the reason…by yourself…absolutely alone.” I was so furious that I mumbled my words. I didn’t know if I made sense.
“I don’t need to tell you anything, but if you must know, my answer is still the same.” He paused a few seconds and spoke again with a smirk, “Labera lege.”
“Excuse me?” I asked, wondering if I had heard correctly. Why was he speaking Latin? Was he playing games with me? I was boiling with rage.
He looked at me squarely in the eye. “Let me repeat what I said in simple language: read...my…lips,” he said softly. “That’s what I said.”
So I did, thinking he was going to tell me something important.
“No, nobody else here,” he said slowly and sarcastically.
I couldn’t believe he just did that to me, but I didn’t believe his answer. “You’re unbelievable!” I shot back.
“I know I am,” he said matter-of-factly.
“I didn’t mean it in a good way!” I said coldly, wanting to burst his ego.
“I did,” he said with his chin held up high.
Now he was just being egotistical, but all I could do was stare at his smooth kissable lips. Stop! I told myself. What was the matter with me? Why was I having these thoughts? I started pacing back and forth, and out of frustration, I yelled, “Ahhh! You are just…just…just…” I was lost for words again.
As I was having my little tantrum, he looked away. Then I thought, Maybe he is telling me the truth. Maybe there is no one else who can help me. Suddenly, a feeling of loneliness began to penetrate. I didn’t know what I was doing here or what the significance of this guy in my dream could be.
I felt his stare from the corner of my eyes and as if he sensed my frustration, he asked in a calmer tone, “Do you have any idea why you are here?”
“No, I don’t know why I’m here or how I got here…and you don’t know why I’m here. So what do I do?” My voice trembled as fear set in. I became desperate for answers.
“Since I have no answers for you, perhaps you should go back.” His tone was flat.
Had he not heard anything I said? Now I was beyond irritated with him. He wanted me to go back, and I didn’t even know how I had gotten here in the first place. For a man who was so pleasing to the eyes, I began to think what a shame it was that he didn’t have a friendlier disposition. Besides, this was my dream. I wasn’t about to go back. In part, I couldn’t go back. I didn’t know how. He started walking through the field, and I had to make a choice. What would become of me if I stayed? What would happen if I followed? So I followed after him into the unknown.
Unexpectedly, he swiftly turned to me and said, “You shouldn’t follow me, and you shouldn’t be here. I don’t care how you get back, but it’s too dangerous here and humans are not allowed. You must go. Do you understand?”
I was about to give it to him with my words, but his warning had frightened me. If I was human, what was he? Reluctantly I nodded yes, but I really didn’t understand. Who was this guy? Why was he here if not to help me? When he noticed that I stood motionless, he said, “You give me no choice.” Then he shou
ted, “Davin, I know you’re listening! Get her out now!”
Before I even had a chance to stop him, I woke up back in my bed. What the heck! The dream was so bizarre. I was extremely confused, and I didn’t know if there was a rhyme or reason for any of it. It seemed so real, but clearly it had all been a dream.
A smile crossed my lips as I vividly recalled the man I saw. I couldn’t forget his face. The curvature of his jaw, his smooth brown hair, and those eyes, so inviting—I could have stared at him forever. His voice was so intoxicating. It was distinct. I could hear it repeatedly telling me that I needed to leave. But why, I wondered. Then I thought about his lack of people skills, and I felt really annoyed with him. Oh, forget it, he’s not even real. It was just a dream, I thought to myself as I looked at the clock.
“Oh, shoot.” I dashed out of bed when I realized I would be late for school if I didn’t hurry. Almost falling flat on my face putting on my jeans, I promised myself that this wouldn’t happen again. I hated being late, especially for school.
As I entered my English class, the second bell rang. Everyone was already seated, and I noticed Kristina looking at me. Her seat was two rows to the right of me.
“Hi,” I whispered, and collapsed on my hard wooden seat, letting out a heavy sigh.
“You okay?” she whispered.
“A long story, I’ll tell you later,” I whispered back. But there was nothing to tell because it was just a dream. How silly it would be for me to even repeat any of it. I reached into my backpack to take out my book. Then I realized I had forgotten to bring my lunch. Great! Now what? Forced to eat the nasty cafeteria food. That’s just great! That’s what I get for daydreaming about an imaginary guy. Without realizing it, I slid down further into my seat, but sat up quickly when Mr. Moore looked my way, giving me that “pay attention” look.
It was extremely difficult to concentrate in class. I kept thinking about my dream, even though I told myself that I wouldn’t. Periodically, a blurred vision of his face would pop up. If only he had been nice, it would have been a perfect dream. Then out of the blue, I remembered his comment about me being a human. Wasn’t he human too? It just didn’t make any sense. My friend Kristina thought I was coming down with the flu from the way I looked. Not only was I exhausted, but also deep in thought, and I was walking around like a zombie.
“Are you okay, Claudia?” Kristina asked after school. “You look like you’re half asleep.”
“I’m just sooo pooped,” I said as I lay my head on her shoulder for a second. “I don’t understand.” I yawned. “I slept last night, I think. Why do I feel like I didn’t sleep a wink? Maybe I am coming down with something. Ahhhh…” I yawned again.
“Well, try not to get sick. Ryan’s eighteenth birthday party is four weeks from Saturday.”
“That’s a month away. I have time to get sick,” I said jokingly. “Counting down till the party?” I asked, nudging her on the shoulder.
“Heck, yeah! It’s at the Grand View Hotel. Who has a birthday party at the Grand View Hotel? For a wedding, I would understand. It’s a five-star hotel. I heard he invited practically the whole senior class. Can you imagine how much the whole thing would cost? I guess if my parents were rich like his, I would have it there too. But you already knew that.
“I only dated him for six months,” I said, implying that I didn’t know much about him.
“You got the Evite, didn’t you? I mean, you did break his heart, and I didn’t know if he would invite you,” she said, her eyes uncertain.
“I got the Evite. Don’t worry. Anyway, we’re friends. Party at the Grand View Hotel…that’s one party I wouldn’t miss…though I really don’t know how to dress cocktail,” I said.
“Good. I’ll tell Maggie you’re going. We were debating whether you would go or not ’cause…you know,” she said, with a raised eyebrow.
“Talking behind my back,” I teased.
“Always,” she said with a smile.
“No wonder my ears were burning,” I said.
“Your ears will be more than burning if you back out,” she said in a half serious, half teasing tone.
“Don’t worry. I’ll be there even if I’m sick,” I said as I closed my eyes, hoping that it would be just enough for my eyes to rest before I opened them up again. Then I yawned.
“Okay then. Now that we got that straightened out, see ya tomorrow,” she said as she yawned. “Stop yawning, you’re making me yawn,” she scolded playfully.
We both laughed. “Same time, same place,” I said, waving good-bye and walking away.
“Don’t forget to RSVP!” I heard her shout from a distance.
“It’s a month away,” I murmured under my breath, knowing it was pointless to say it out loud since I could no longer see her.
Ryan was my first boyfriend; the first guy I had held hands with and the first guy I had kissed. He was tall, good-looking, and mega-rich. Any girl would have loved to be in my shoes—except for Patty. She thought he wasn’t good enough for me. I told her that she needed to get to know him better, and that being rich didn’t automatically make him a snob. But I guess that wasn’t the reason she disliked him, and I didn’t see him the same way. She had more experience with boys than I did, so I figured she had her reasons. But I continued to date him anyway.
We started having problems when Ryan started getting more serious. Not only was I not ready to move forward, I had also realized that he didn’t make me feel the way a girl should feel when she’s in love. Like how the guy in my dream made me feel, I thought unexpectedly. I quivered from the sudden feeling I experienced, the fluttering butterflies everywhere, like when I first looked into his eyes. I had never believed in love at first sight; maybe I did now, even with his bad manners and all. I wasn’t sure what it was that I felt, but I knew it was something I had never felt before. Regardless, it didn’t matter because it was just a dream, after all. These feelings confirmed that breaking up with Ryan was the right thing to do. It was best for both of us.
After school, I headed straight for the refrigerator. I grabbed something to snack on, and sure enough, there it was. The note read, “Working late tonight, left dinner in the fridge.” Mom never failed to leave me a note letting me know whether she’d be working late or not. Home alone, I thought. It never used to bother me, but for some reason, it did tonight. I couldn’t quite put my finger on the reason why, but I was guessing it had something to do with the dream I had last night.
All was quiet in the house, until the sound of my cell phone made me jump. The caller ID read Lucy Reed. Lucy Reed was Gamma’s real name, but as a toddler I was unable to say “Grandma”, so she became Gamma to me.
“Hello, Gamma,” I answered excitedly.
“Hello, Claudia. I haven’t heard your voice in days, so I decided to call you and see how you are doing. Is it a good time to talk?” she asked.
“It’s fine, Gamma. I’m fine. How are you?”
“I’m fine, honey. Don’t worry about me. You will come and visit me on your birthday, won’t you?”
“Yes, of course. I’ll be there,” I said.
“Okay, honey. I just called to say hello. I’ll see you soon.”
“Good night, Gamma,” I said, and blew her a kiss through the phone.
After hanging up the phone, I completed my homework and ate dinner. I decided to head to bed a bit earlier than usual because I felt so drained. Just snuggling inside my bed was all I could think of. As exhausted as I was, though, I was fighting sleep. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t resist the need. I had no choice; my eyes were so heavy that I could no longer control them. One lid at a time, they slowly closed, and I felt my whole body relax. Please don’t dream was my last thought before I drifted off to the unknown world once again.
Chapter 4
Back on the same road, I stood there alone. I decided to sit and just wait. Why did I keep dreaming about this place? There had to be a reason, seeing as this place was consuming my dream w
orld. Yet, what was the point of being here when I couldn’t get any answers? Would I see her, or him, again? Perhaps someone new? Not knowing what to expect was a bit frightening, but a sense of excitement began to seep through my bones as I saw someone walking in the distance. My heart was pounding rapidly; I had almost forgotten how good-looking he was.
All I could remember was this strange queasiness in my stomach, but as he got closer, I saw that it wasn’t him. This man’s features were very similar to the guy I had met before, sharing much of the same beauty. He had a similar body frame, but his hair was a lighter shade of brown, and his eyes were emerald green. I felt disappointed and saddened because he had lied to me. He had told me that he was the only one here, but seeing this new guy just confirmed that there were others. As the stranger approached, I prepared myself for rudeness, like the last guy. But instead, I was surprised by his amiable voice.
“Hello, my name is Davin,” he said cheerfully. I was relieved by the sweetness in his voice, and as I tried to remember why that name sounded familiar, he spoke again. “So you’re back.”
Back? How did he know I was here before? I wasn’t sure how to answer his question. “Honestly, I don’t know how I ended up here. The last thing I remember is falling asleep, and now I’m here.”
As I was talking, he started circling around me, eyeing me slowly and intently from head to toe. Did I say something wrong? I was starting to feel more and more uncomfortable; it seemed he was staring endlessly. Did he have to make it that obvious? He was totally checking me out. Oh my gosh! What a player. I should have known from his friendly approach. When he finally stopped, I expected him to say some stupid pick-up line, but instead, he just smiled.
I crossed my arms with irritation. “Excuse me, but are you looking for something?” I finally got the courage to ask this unnerving stranger.