by Stella James
“Everything okay?” He asks.
“Peachy. Who’s your friend?”
“Are you jealous Grey?” He smirks.
“No. Yes. Maybe,” I reply. “Should I be?”
“Hey, where is this coming from? I thought we discussed being exclusive?”
“We did,” I say. “And I assume we are. But the fact that you continue to keep me a dirty little secret makes me wonder why exactly?”
He drags his palms down his face and exhales roughly as he sits down on the bench beside me.
“Look, that woman, Lorraine, is just a mom from Jamie’s school. I have no interest in her or anyone else. But I don’t know if I’m ready to flaunt whatever this is, in front of Jamie just yet. It’s been her and I for three years, I don’t want to mess up,” he says, effectively making me feel like a complete brat. Ugh.
“You’re right, I’m sorry. I just, I don’t know. I’m just having an off day,” I offer. “Don’t worry about it, I’m getting my period or something.”
“Grey, I don’t wan-“
“It’s fine,” I say. “I think I’m just going to head home, I’m not feeling that great and I just need to lie down. This heat is getting to me.”
“Okay, are you okay to drive?”
“Yes Eric,” I say as I stand. “I’m fine, just tired.”
I feel his eyes on me as I walk back to the parking lot and away from our conversation. I’m floundering and I hate that feeling. I need to get my head on straight before I start making demands that I’m not even sure I want. I’m in no position to ask anything of Eric until I come clean and he knows everything.
*
When I open my eyes I check the time and see that I’ve been asleep for a few hours. It’s eight p.m. and I feel no better now than I did earlier this afternoon. Eric and I need to talk.
Me: Hey, are you busy?
I climb off the bed and head for the bathroom. I fix my hair and brush my teeth, checking my phone as I stand in the kitchen and drink a glass of cold water.
Eric: Just put Jamie to bed.
Me: Can we talk?
Eric: Patio?
Me: Be up in five.
I throw on an old hoodie and head upstairs and out to the patio. Eric is already out there, lighting a fire in the small iron enclosure that sits on the deck.
“Hey,” I say, closing the doors behind me.
“How are you feeling?” He asks, standing.
“Fine. Thanks. I’m sorry about earlier, I wasn’t feeling quite like myself,” I say, sitting down on the bench and tucking my legs beneath me. “There’s something I need to tell you, and once I do I’m not sure where that will leave us, but I need you to know that I care about you. And Jamie. I understand why you want to keep things discreet but eventually I’m going to need more. And I can’t ask you for that without telling you the whole truth. My whole truth.”
“Grey, what is it?” He takes the seat beside me, his warmth instantly comforting me and reminding me why it’s so important that I’m honest with him. My heart could very easily become entangled in whatever this thing is between us and I can’t take that risk fully without giving him an out before I’m too far gone. It’s only fair. To both of us.
“After my mother passed away I knew that I wanted to start over. I had no reason to stay in the city and no reason to stay at the club. The money was good, but I’d mostly kept up with all her medical bills and she had a small life insurance policy that I used for her funeral and things like that,” I say. “About a month before I left the city I was leaving the club one night after my shift when I was approached while walking to my car.”
“Busy night?”
My eyes scan the parking lot and land on a shadow of a man leaning against a lamp post two rows over from where my car is parked. Sometimes customers like to linger in the parking lot, thinking they’ll score some kind of extra off the menu. I have my pepper spray in one hand and the panic button for my car’s alarm in the other.
“No busier than usual,” I say casually as I keep walking.
He stands tall and begins to step towards me just as I reach the driver’s side door.
“Look asshole, I’m not afraid to blind you so you better just keep walking and try to find your fun elsewhere,” I say, holding up the small can of mace.
He smiles at me and in the glow of the light above us I can see the silver badge clipped onto his belt.
“Not looking for fun sweetheart, just looking for someone who’s willing to talk,” he says.
“His name was Miles Monroe. He was and still is a detective in the narcotics division,” I explain. “His team had been staking out The Diamond Room for months based on some intel that my boss, Eddie, was using the club as a pit stop for incoming drug shipments. Of course, compared to the bigger fish involved, Eddie was just a speck of dirt, but a necessary speck of dirt in order to bring the whole thing down,” I say. “It wasn’t a big deal, all he wanted was a journal of who came to see Eddie and on what days. I’d been there for long enough that I knew most of the customers by name and the ones detective Monroe was so interested in were the high end clients. Lawyers, officials, anyone with a title basically.”
“So you were what? An informant?”
“I wouldn’t go that far. I had no information to share besides what I started jotting down,” I say. “I didn’t even suspect drugs were anywhere near the club until I spoke to the detective. I observed for nearly a month, checked in every Sunday night and handed in my notes. I still planned on leaving and I’d told the detective that. He wanted me to stay for a couple more weeks but something happened.”
I change into my street clothes and toss my bag over my shoulder. I’ve already cleaned out my locker and I don’t really feel close enough to anyone else that works here to bother saying goodbye, so I don’t. I head down the dark hallway to the back exit and pass Eddie’s office when I notice the door is open a crack and two voices are arguing on the other side.
“I told you to get this shit sorted,” he says. “What the fuck am I supposed to tell everyone else when they wonder where the fuck their shipment is?”
“It’s not my fault,” Eddie says. “You nearly tripled your request this month. It takes time to acquire that much blow. Especially if you give a shit about quality.”
“Don’t get smart with me, you’re playing with the big dogs now and you’re expected to have your shit together. We’ve got customers waiting.”
“I’ll reach out to my contact tomorrow and demand a timeframe. Will that get you off my ass?”
I take a step back and the floor creaks beneath my feet. I pause and hold my breath before taking another step and continuing for the back door.
“Not so fast sweetheart.”
I turn slowly and face a familiar customer. He’s in his mid-thirties, he’s handsome and polished and he’s one of the city’s most prominent up and coming district attorneys.
“I’m on my way out, but if you need something, one of the other girls can help you I’m sure,” I say sweetly.
He approaches me with confidence and as his eyes rake over the length of my body, my skin crawls and my stomach drops. When I think he’s about to reach out and touch me, I hear Eddie’s voice from the open doorway.
“What are you doing back here?” He barks.
“Just heading home,” I reply, turning on my heel and heading out the door. I dial detective Monroe before I’m even out of the parking lot.
“When I told him what happened he felt it was best to push up my plans and put a detail on me just in case. He said to keep it as casual as possible, so I worked a few more shifts and then told Eddie I was quitting. He was pissed he’d have to rework the schedule to cover my absence but he didn’t seem any more surly that usual. I emptied my account, but kept it open in case anyone checked and detective Monroe gave me my new ID,” I say. “My lease was up anyways so I left the big stuff and packed the essentials. I know it’s a lot to take in, but I swear I’m still m
e, I haven’t lied about anything except my last name and that was just a precaution.”
“These men? They’re looking for you?”
“As far as I know, no. Detective Monroe didn’t think they would be but wanted to ensure I was safe regardless. He said the biggest thing working in favour of the case he was building was that no one knew what I was doing. The higher ups wanted to keep me in and wanted me to keep digging but he convinced them that I was better off leaving under the radar and that I had gathered enough to give them a solid start. I wasn’t under any obligation to stay. But I will have to go back. I will have to testify at some point.”
I slide from the bench and walk over to the railing, leaning with my back to it as Eric continues to study me silently. The uncertainty of whether or not I’ve just dumped way too much reality on our little arrangement is making me squirm. He stands from the bench and walks towards me.
“Eric, I am so sorry, the last thing I want to do is put you and Jamie or anyone else in the middle of something that has nothing to do with you,” I say. “I didn’t plan on you, on this. I understand if you want to cool off or even if you want me to leave.” He stops in front of me and extends his arms, pulling me to his chest and holding me firmly against him.
“We’ll figure this out babe. Together,” he says, pulling back and using his hand to tilt my chin up so that our eyes meet. “You’re not alone.”
Chapter 10
Eric
I’m deep in thought, replaying Grey’s confession over and over in my mind as I sit in my truck and fill out the last of my paperwork for the day. I meant what I said to her last night, she can count on me and I won’t turn her away. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep my daughter safe but Grey is a part of our lives now and I might not be able to define my feelings for her and she might not be Jamie’s mother, but she matters. I won’t make her feel any more alone than she did when she fled the city she called home for her entire life leading up to the day she took off. As far as I’m concerned, we are in this together.
Which brings me to my next dilemma…Jamie. I’ve done my best to keep her life stable but if I’m being honest, I’m getting sick of sneaking around in the middle of the night with Grey. I want her in my arms all night, I want to wake up with her scent around me and the feel of her skin against mine. I’ve got to tell Jamie and get us out in the open. I know Grey understands my hesitancy and I appreciate it more than she could ever know, but enough is enough. I’ve claimed her, marked her as mine as far as I’m concerned and aside from the pain in the ass of sneaking around, the demanding bastard within me that she seems to bring out is getting anxious to warn any other man sniffing around that she’s taken. I haven’t felt this possessive before, not even with Brandi, which makes me feel like a complete prick. It’s not that Grey is better than her, just different.
I glance at my phone and then up at the abandoned jobsite in front of me. My crew is packed up and gone and when I fill out the last page I shoot a quick text to Cole and update him before starting my truck and heading for home.
When I walk through the front door, the scent of pasta greets me and I can hear Jamie and Grey in the kitchen. When I round the corner, I see Grey standing at the stove with Jamie standing on a chair beside her. Grey turns and gives me a bright smile while encouraging Jamie to keep stirring.
“Hey you,” she says.
“Daddy, we’re making spaghetti,” Jamie says.
“I see that,” I step towards Grey and every logical thought leaves me as I tug her towards me and plant a kiss on her surprised lips. “Hey,” I say against her mouth.
“Umm, hi,” she says.
“Daddy did you just kiss Grey?”
“I did. Is that okay?”
“Yup,” she says, turning her attention back to the sauce pan.
Grey looks from Jamie to me and arches one perfect eyebrow before smiling and turning back to the stove.
“I’m going to go clean up,” I say heading for the stairs.
When I come back down, my girls are setting the table for three. My girls. The thought pops into my head quicker than I can stop to overthink it. And maybe that’s for the best.
Once Jamie is bathed and tucked in by both Grey and myself, I head out to my truck and gather up a stack of receipts and invoices that I’ll need to sort through tomorrow. When I come back inside I find Grey in the kitchen wiping down the countertops and loading the last of the dishes.
“You don’t have to do that,” I say, tugging gently on her hand and pulling her into me.
“I know I don’t,” she smiles against my chest as she wraps her arms around my waist.
“Come upstairs with me?”
She leans back with uncertainty written all over her face. “Are you sure?”
“Jamie knows we’re going to be kissing,” I say, lowering my mouth to the side of her neck and nipping gently. “I’m sure it won’t shock her if she sees you here in the morning.”
“No, I know. I just, well are you sure you want another woman up there?” She asks quietly. “I don’t want to intrude on a space that you shared with your wife. It doesn’t feel right to me.”
“Brandi never even lived in this house, babe. She passed away while we were still building it,” I explain. “I want you in my bed Grey,” I hold her face gently in my hands and press my mouth to hers, licking at the seam of her lips until she opens up for me and I can kiss her the way I’ve been wanting to since I came home from work and saw her standing in my kitchen. She’s not competing with a ghost and I feel a sudden urge to prove it to her. She moans softly and presses herself against me. I pull my mouth from hers and when her eyes flutter open, I grin at the slight irritation I see.
“I wasn’t ready for you to stop kissing me,” she says.
“Then come upstairs with me,” I reply. “I want your body wrapped around mine all night long,” I kiss a trail along the side of her neck, dipping down to press my mouth to her collar bone. “I want to wake up with you, and slip inside you when the sun is shining in through the curtains,” I rasp against her skin.
I grasp her hand in mine and lead her to the staircase.
“First door on the left,” I tell her. “I’m going to check on Jamie first and I’ll be right up.”
She smiles and nods before heading upstairs while I confirm what I already knew, Jamie is passed out with her favourite stuffed lamb buried underneath her arm. I close her door, leaving it open just a crack and switch off all the lights except for the nightlights that shine in the hallway and into the living room. I lock up and head upstairs to Grey, pausing when I reach the doorway to watch her as she stands at the balcony doors and stares out the window. She pulls the elastic from her hair and threads her fingers through the strands, combing out the loose waves. I’m completely hypnotized by her and the simple act, I can’t seem to do much more than stare and admire her.
The floor groans beneath my feet as I click the door shut behind me and flip the lock. She turns to face me, a gasp on her full lips. She presses a hand to her chest and chuckles.
“You scared me,” she says. She’s turned on the bedside lamp and in the subtle glow her skin looks even softer than I know it is.
“Come here,” I say stepping towards the bed, holding my hand out for her. She slips her palm in mine and looks up at me as she pulls her bottom lip between her teeth. Christ that mouth.
“You mean something to me Grey, I want you to know that,” I say, tucking her hair behind her ear. I lean down and press my mouth just below her ear. “I don’t know when it happened but you’ve become mine,” I rasp against her smooth skin. “And there’s no one in this room but the two of us.”
She expels a soft breath and continues to stand still as I step behind her and lift her hair, grazing my teeth along the back of her neck, watching as a shiver noticeably makes her shutter. I reach around her front for the hem of her white T-shirt and pull it over her head. I unclasp her white satin bra next and slowly pull the straps over
her shoulders, watching as they fall down her arms and the garment floats to the floor. I take my time kissing and nipping a trail across the back of her shoulders, reaching my hands around to her full breasts and gripping them gently. She sways slightly as a low moan crosses her lips and she places her palms above mine.
“You’re beautiful Grey, every inch of you is perfection,” I praise. “Turn around and let me see you baby.”
She spins slowly as our hands drop from her chest and I tease the waistband of her thin cotton shorts. Her eyes are heavy with a desire that my own hands and mouth have put there, causing satisfaction to course through my veins. She looks down and watches as I tug her bottoms down her thighs slowly and sink to my knees in front of her, pulling them all the way down her shapely legs as she steps out of them and gently kicks them aside. I run one hand along her inner thigh to the juncture between and swipe one finger along her slit, coating it with her wetness and bringing it to my mouth, tasting her. A low growl rumbles from my chest as I stand and gently press her to sit on the bed.
“Lay back and open your legs,” I say. “Put your arms above your head.”
The second she complies I’m placing one hand firmly on her stomach, holding her in place as I bring my mouth to her pussy and use my free hand to part her glistening folds. I lick her slowly and pause on her clit, swirling my tongue in a steady circle, humming with approval as her sweet scent fills my nostrils and she jerks beneath me.
“Eric,” she gasps, making a move to bring her hands down.
“Keep your arms where they are baby and I won’t stop until you’re coming all over my tongue,” I growl.
She places her hands back on the pillow above her head and grinds her hips up, weakening my desire to go slow. I suck her clit into my mouth and drive two fingers inside her slick center, plunging them in and out while I feast on her. Every moan that fills the room is met with my own low grumble of appreciation as she responds to my touch. Her taste is intoxicating, her pleasure is my addiction.