by Emma Renshaw
24
Ridge
I kissed along Zoe’s neck. She was warm and pink from the sun. She tilted her head to the side, giving me more access to her throat. I groaned against her skin as she ground her ass against my hard cock. My hand coasted up her torso, cupping her breast, plucking her nipple through the tank top she was wearing.
“If you keep doing that, I’ll burn the meat and we won’t have dinner,” she said. I could hear the smile in her voice, and I fucking loved her. She was standing in my kitchen, where she’d moved around like she was at home as she’d started making dinner. She was taking sips from a bottle of beer on the countertop. I’d come in from unloading the truck to find her hips swaying as she hummed to the music playing from her phone.
Before I could even take another breath, I was across the room, kissing her and caressing her. She tempted me without even trying.
“I don’t care,” I answered. “We’ll order a pizza and bet on how many orgasms I can give you before it arrives.”
She laughed just as my phone started ringing. I groaned, taking it from my pocket to switch it off, but paused when I saw the name on the screen. It had been a few weeks since I’d heard from Bobby. His last call had informed me, yet again, that he hadn’t found my sister, I’d told him to only call when he had something.
My muscles coiled tightly, tensing and ready to spring into action. Zoe spun in my arms and placed her hands on my biceps. “Ridge, are you okay?”
I nodded before answering the phone. “Hello?”
“Bobby Wright here.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, Bobby.”
“I found her.”
My hand found the side of Zoe’s neck, and I leaned forward, resting my forehead against hers, seeking her in this moment. A swirl of emotions that I couldn’t even fucking grasp racked me. I’d been searching for Avery, but I’d never truly expected to hear those words.
“Ridge?” Zoe asked. Her voice shook and smoke wafted up behind her. I reached around her, turning the dial to off and moving the pan from the hot burner.
“Hold on, clover,” I whispered.
“Did you hear me?” Bobby asked.
“Yeah, Bobby, I heard you. Fuck. Where is she?”
Zoe studied my expression, dinner forgotten behind her. Her small, delicate, smooth hands stayed on my biceps before she slid one up my shoulder to the back of my neck. I sighed when she wove her fingers into my hair.
“Real close. She’s in Cedar Springs. It’s about an hour’s drive from Hawk Valley. I can run down the report with you on the phone or send it over and you can look at it in your own time. There’s pictures included.”
“Is she okay?” I asked.
“Your sister seems to have a good life.”
My eyes closed for a moment. That was what I’d wanted to know and had been searching for. “Send the report and send me your bill. Thank you, Bobby.”
I hung up the phone and stared into Zoe’s eyes. I was still in complete shock and didn’t know what to do next. When I’d started this search, I’d never quite pictured what would happen if Bobby actually found her. He’d said she was living a good life. Did I have a right to know more than that? I didn’t know the answer to that, but I didn’t think I would be able to stop myself from reading the report.
Fuck. An hour.
She’d been an hour from me. For how long?
“Ridge? Is everything okay?”
I nodded. “I found my sister.”
“You have a sister?” she asked, taken aback. “You haven’t mentioned her.”
I grabbed Zoe’s beer from the counter and guzzled it down in one swallow. Zoe removed her hands from me and went to the kitchen cabinet in the corner. I watched her open the door and pull down the bottle of tequila and a shot glass. “I saw this earlier when I was looking through your cabinets. Need a shot?”
I nodded, my chest filling with a warmth I didn’t and shouldn’t identify. It would be way too easy to get used to Zoe being in my space like this, being here in these moments, and fuck if she didn’t know exactly what to do. Person after person had walked out on me over the years. I’d come to expect it. It was nothing new. I’d thought Elise breaking off an engagement and leaving me would be the worst.
That pain wouldn’t even be a flicker compared to the inferno Zoe would leave in her wake in a few short weeks.
I slammed the tequila to the back of my throat, relishing the burn. I lifted my glass as she poured me another one. Once I’d shot that one back, I grabbed the bottle from her and took her hand in mine until I reached my living room couch and pulled Zoe down on top of me. She was the only reason I was even semi-grounded in this moment.
A hurricane of emotions battled inside me, pulling me apart. My phone beeped with an email alert. I glanced at it. It was from Bobby. I couldn’t open the email right away.
I dropped my phone to the couch, leaning back, scrubbing one hand over my face and leaving the other on Zoe’s hip. Zoe had trusted me today with her past. I wanted to do the same with her. I wanted her to be the one person in the world that knew it all. “You aren’t the only one with shitty parents.” I laughed without any humor. “Mine were addicted to drugs and alcohol. They couldn’t stay sober long enough to feed or clothe me or my sister. So I had to step up and take care of us.”
“Ridge,” Zoe whispered, her touch finding its way back to the ends of my hair at the base of my neck, instantly calming me a little bit.
“Avery. That’s my sister’s name. I did everything I could for her, but it wasn’t enough. She deserved so much more. She was so sweet even as a baby. I used to rock her to sleep and hide in the closet with her when my parents threw parties.”
“How old were you?”
I shrugged. “That was all my life, clover. At least until I was eight. Avery was five.”
“You were taking care of an infant and a toddler at that age?” Zoe tightened her hold on me.
I stared into her eyes, my throat clogging with weight of the past. “I had to.”
Zoe’s lips found mine for a soft kiss and she whispered against them. “You’re the best man I’ve ever known.”
Pride filled my chest, and my fingers dug into her side until she fell on top of me. She readjusted, laying her head on my shoulder, and wrapped an arm around my middle. “What happened when you were eight?”
“One of my parents fell asleep with a lit cigarette, caught the living room on fire. I called 9-1-1. We were removed from the home after that. The first foster family we went to, they adopted Avery, but I went back into the system.”
“Why?” Zoe asked harshly and sat up, peering down at me with unshed tears in her eyes.
“They got pregnant and couldn’t handle three children. Avery was young enough that they could raise her as their own. I was eight and too old. I bounced around after that and never saw Avery again.”
“And now you’ve found her?”
I nodded and glanced at the phone on the couch. “I hired a private investigator, and that call was telling me he’d found her. She’s an hour away.”
“Wow,” Zoe whispered. “What now?”
I scoffed. “Fuck. I don’t know.”
“Why did you want to find her?”
Avery’s five-year-old face appeared in my mind. She used to have blond hair and deep brown eyes. Would she still? “I needed to know that she’s lived a good life. I don’t want to ruin anything for her. Fuck. I don’t even know if she would remember me. She was really young, and she could’ve blocked me out. Part of me hopes that’s true. If she did that means she blocked out our parents too. I don’t want her remembering any of that shit. Bobby sent over the file about her.”
“Do you want me to leave so you can have some space to look at it?”
I immediately shook my head and looked into her concerned eyes. “Don’t go. Stay with me while I do this?”
She nodded and I took a big breath. “Wait,” she said, stopping me from grabbing my phone. “
Before you read through all the information—right now, what do you want to do? See her? Meet her? Leave her be? You don’t know what you’ll find in that file, and I think it’s important to acknowledge what you want.”
“Will you take a drive out to Cedar Springs with me?”
“I’d go anywhere with you, Ridge.”
That may be true, but she still wouldn’t stay.
25
Ridge
I’d sat on the information about Avery for a week, but I’d read through the file so many times that I’d all but memorized every damn word. Bobby hadn’t disappointed. He’d included everything about her. After the adoption, they’d moved to a small town in Oklahoma, where she’d become a swimmer. I’d read a newspaper clipping about her undefeated season.
It’d taken a week to decide how to handle the situation. I glanced at Zoe across from me in the booth. She was dressed in all black, even had a black scarf tied around her head to hold her hair back from her face. I chuckled.
Zoe narrowed her eyes on me. “Are you laughing at my recon-mission outfit again?”
“Will you have an outfit for everything we do?”
She shrugged and smiled. “Maybe.”
I looked around the small diner. This was the diner where Avery worked. I didn’t know if she was working today, but it was a busy Saturday, so I’d figured we’d take our shot. If Avery didn’t show today, we’d try again tomorrow.
Zoe leaned across the table “Have you seen her yet?” she whispered.
“You don’t have to whisper that quietly, clover.”
“What if she hears us?”
“How would she even know we’re talking about her? The last time she saw me, I was eight and she was only five.”
Zoe nodded, leaning back in the booth and taking a sip of her coffee. “Are you going to talk to her today?”
That’d been the real reason I’d waited a week to come and see Avery. I still didn’t know what to do about the situation. If it were as easy as driving by and seeing that she’d lived a good life through a window, I would’ve already done that.
“Here’s your pancakes, hon.” Dora, our waitress, placed the plate down in front of Zoe.
“Dora…” Zoe tapped her finger on her chin. “I’ve been thinking maybe I should also try the French toast with the apple cinnamon jam.”
Dora laughed and patted Zoe’s shoulder. “You won’t regret it if you do, hon. They’re delicious.”
Zoe nodded. “Check on me after the pancakes.”
Dora nodded before walking away, shaking her head. I hadn’t ordered any food. The black coffee sitting in front of me was enough for now. I ran a hand through my hair and smiled when Zoe took her first bite of pancakes. Her eyes crossed as she moaned appreciatively.
Color bloomed on her cheeks when her eyes met mine. She’d read the file as many times as I had. Memories of my childhood had plagued me throughout the week, and my mind had bounced back and forth, making up different lives Avery could’ve lived. Based on the little information I had, it had been a good one, but secrets could be hidden beneath the surface. A smile could hide the pain. Clothes could hide bruises.
“Ridge,” Zoe whispered, staring past me. I looked over my shoulder. Avery was walking through the side door. Her hair was still blond, but not as light as when we were kids, and from here I could tell that her eyes were still a deep, rich brown.
“Hey, Dora.” Avery tied an apron around her waist and put her purse underneath the counter. “Sorry I’m late.”
I turned back to Zoe. Her plate was still mostly full of pancakes. We didn’t have the check, but suddenly I wanted to bolt. Sweat broke out on my forehead. I cleared my throat and took another sip of coffee.
“This is a stupid idea,” I muttered.
“Why?” Zoe’s nose wrinkled.
“What the hell am I supposed to say? Hey, I’m your long-lost fucking brother?” I whispered and swept a hand through my hair. “I can’t mess up her life because I’m curious.” I looked down at the Formica tabletop. “Dammit.” What fucking right did I have to burst into her life? It had been over twenty years. This wasn’t fair to her.
“Ridge. Ridge. Ridge.”
I glanced up. Zoe’s face had gone ashen. “Clover, are you okay?” She didn’t make eye contact with me, just tracked something across the room.
She was approaching our table. “I heard you may want some French toast after your pancakes. Dora’s on her way out, I’ll be taking over. My name’s Avery.”
I froze and swallowed. My gut sank like an anchor. I looked closely at my sister for the first time in twenty years. From a glance, she looked good, no signs of visible trauma. My gaze zeroed in on the dimple in her right cheek. She only had one.
“Y-yes,” Zoe said with a strained smile. “I’d like to try them please.”
“Sure thing. Do you want a refill on your coffee?”
Zoe nodded and my gaze bounced back and forth between them. Light a building on fire? I’ll go in. No fucking problem. Put me on a plane? I’ll jump out of it. But suddenly I was fucking nervous. Nervous. I didn’t know what to do or say. I ran a hand through my hair again, sure it was sticking up in every direction.
“What about you? Would you like anything to eat or a coffee refill?” Avery’s eyes opened wide and she licked her lips. She looked down at the notepad in her hands and back at me. “What’s your name?”
My ground my teeth together and my jaw clicked. “Ridge,” I finally answered.
“Do you know who I am?” Avery asked.
Zoe’s hand shot across the table, covering mine and squeezing it. I flipped my hand over, lacing our fingers together, using her hand as a lifeline. I slowly nodded.
“One second,” Avery said, with tears in her eyes, and walked away. Zoe and I watched her leave before turning to each other at the same time.
“We should go,” I said and started to slide from the booth. She didn’t want me here. I’d fucked up by barging in thinking I could go unnoticed.
Zoe nodded. “Sure.”
“Are you leaving?” Avery stepped back in front of the table.
“Yes.” I shook my head while pinching the bridge of my nose. I looked her in the eye as I stood to my full height, rolling back my shoulders. Tension was seeping into every one of my muscles. “I didn’t want to do this to you. I’m sorry for showing up here out of the blue.”
“I asked for my lunch break early. Stay.” Avery untied the apron around her waist and sat on the side of the booth Zoe had just vacated.
Zoe squeezed around me and pulled me back into the booth with her. She placed her hand on my thigh, and I wrapped my hand around hers. She reached her free hand across the table to Avery. “Hi, I’m Zoe.”
“I’m Avery.” She smiled while shaking Zoe’s hand. I was still stunned to be in this situation. I needed fuckin’ cue cards to get through the next half hour. My mind had gone blank, and I couldn’t remember how to have a damn conversation.
“How did you know?” I blurted out while they were still shaking hands.
Avery looked out the window toward the parking lot. “You look like our biological father.”
“You remember him?” I asked, incredulous. I’d thought if she had any memories from that time they would be vague, hazy, and not detailed enough to say I looked like our biological father. I knew I did. The only difference was our muscle mass. He had been bone-thin from years of drug abuse, and I had muscle from years of training.
“I put in your order for the French toast, Zoe. A refill should be coming out soon too. Ridge, I ordered you a Buckle Bustin’ scramble. It has a lot of meat, and men seem to enjoy it,” she said, ignoring my question.
“I’m sure I’ll like it.”
Avery sighed. Zoe squeezed my thigh and scooted closer to me. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. Avery watched my arm and smiled softly.
“I don’t remember him from when I was little,” she finally answered. “He found me when I was eleve
n, showed up at the front door, and tried to con my parents into giving him money.”
“Bastard,” I mumbled, shaking my head.
“I remember you,” Avery whispered and wiped a tear from her eye. “My memories are fuzzy, but some are there. You used to sing to me when you gave me a bath.”
I licked my lips as my throat closed and my nose burned. I nodded. “I did. ‘Itsy Bitsy Spider.’ It’s the only kids’ song I knew.”
Zoe planted a small kiss on the wrist resting on her shoulder. I looked down at her, and she wiped under her eyes and smiled at me. She was looking at me like I made the sun rise. My chest swelled, and I exhaled slowly as I turned back to Avery. She was watching us closely and she looked content.
“You’re not like them,” she said quietly. “I thought about you a lot, and I always worried you would turn into them.”
I shook my head. “Never. I swore I would never be like them. I thought about you too. All the time. I’m sorry I barged in here. When I found you, I only wanted to know that you’ve had a good life.”
She nodded. “I have had a good life. It wasn’t always easy, it wasn’t perfect. I’ve had some bumps and bruises along the way, but mostly it’s been good. What about you?”
I sighed. “It’s been better since I aged out of the system. I’m a firefighter and my life is good now. I live in Hawk Valley.”
Her eyes widened. “You’re really close.”
“I don’t…” I trailed off, rubbing my neck. “I don’t know what to expect from this, and I’ll let you drive this train. I’d like to be in your life, Avery. As a friend or as a big brother. In any way you let me. But if you want me to say that I’ve satisfied my curiosity and walk out this door without ever coming back, I’ll do that too. But know if you choose that option, you can always call me and I will come running if you need me. Whether we talk or go thirty years without speaking—if you need me, I’ll be there.”
Zoe cleared her throat. “I won’t try and persuade you, Avery. It’s all your decision, and I only know the little Ridge has told me of y’all’s childhood, but Ridge is the best man I’ve ever known. I want you to know that. What he says is true, he will always be there. You can count on him.”