by Len Webster
“Mum,” AJ said, interrupting her, thankful that the usual fans who sat behind them hadn’t made it to their seats yet. “Fenway Park is not the place to talk about this stuff, and Dad will be here any second. Just please don’t tell him I had sex.”
“I won’t tell him. Even if he did find out, in his eyes you’re the Virgin Mary for the rest of your life.”
AJ burst out laughing. “Seriously? Oh, my God.”
“I know. But your father isn’t an idiot. He just chooses to be oblivious to that part of our daughter’s life.” Her mother squeezed her hand. “I’m glad you waited, Alexandra. I’m so glad you waited for someone you love and trust, and someone who loves and respects you.”
“Thanks, Mum, but incoming. Dad’s on his way to his seat,” AJ warned.
“Right,” her mother said as she pulled her hand away from AJ’s arm and turned to face AJ’s father as he took his seat next to her mother.
“What did I miss?” he asked as he reached over and handed AJ her popcorn.
Her mother kissed her father’s cheek and took her bottle of water from him. “Your daughter was telling me how excited she is that the whole family will be coming to Brookline for Christmas this year.”
AJ blinked at her parents. “By whole family, are you saying the New York family?”
Her father nodded. “Yup. They’re coming to Massachusetts early since they didn’t come for Christmas last year.”
“So Will’s coming home from California?”
Her mother grinned. “Will is coming home from California.”
The Red Sox won.
Kyle Gilmore became the youngest captain in Red Sox history to captain a three-time World Series team. When the last ball had been pitched, Fenway Park erupted in cheers. It was intoxicating and a reminder of how much it felt like home. Kyle had looked out into the stadium after his team and staff ran to the pitcher’s mound to hug him and celebrate. His grin had her speechless. The appreciation in his eyes had her smiling. Then he had glanced over at her parents and waved.
After AJ and her parents sang and celebrated with the fans around them, they were escorted by security to the function rooms to celebrate the Red Sox making it into another World Series. It felt like a mini reunion being with all the backroom staff again. Many asked about college, and others still apologized for the article that had been published and expressed their support and admiration for how she had handled the situation.
“Alexi?”
She glanced over her shoulder to find Kyle in a Red Sox baseball cap heading toward her. She turned back around and smiled at the mayor of Boston. “I’m sorry about that, Mayor. You were saying?”
In his mid-twenties, Devon Easton was one of the youngest mayors to ever govern Boston. He was young, attractive, and wore his tailored suits confidently. AJ understood why so many women loved him and why so many men aspired to be like him. He was featured as an up-and-coming political figure on the cover of Time Magazine. Many had said he resembled a young JFK, and rumor had it he intended to run for the presidency in the near future.
The mayor smiled, his bright blue eyes shimmering at her. “I was saying what a remarkable young woman you are for what you’ve achieved. The statement you made against The Daily Sportstourage was inspiring. Miss Parker—”
AJ shook her head. “Please, Mayor Easton. Please call me Alex.”
Mayor Easton reached up and set a hand on her shoulder. “Well, Alex, you’ve inspired a lot of young women and men.” His grin stretched farther, but his smile did nothing to her. No flutter or spark like many insisted they felt around him. The mayor squeezed her shoulder and then dropped his hand. “The money you donated was an act of class. I’m very happy to have such an outstanding citizen like yourself in my city. Thank you for not only being a beautiful representation of Boston but for also standing up for what is right.”
“Mayor—”
“Please, Devon will be just fine, Alex,” he insisted.
A cough had the mayor glancing over as she felt a hand settle on the small of her back. “Mayor Easton.”
“Kyle,” Devon said in a blunt tone. Then he smiled at AJ. “Alex, if you ever have a free moment, please get in contact with my office. I’d love to talk to you more about what a positive role model you are.”
“Oh, umm, thank you, Devon.” It felt weird to call the mayor by his first name. It was as uncomfortable as Kyle’s twitching fingers against her back. “If I have time before I head back to Duke, sure.”
“That’s great. I look forward to that call. Kyle, congratulations on another World Series with the Red Sox. On behalf of the city of Boston, I’d like to express my gratitude to you and your team’s passion and dedication out there.”
“Thank you, Mayor,” Kyle said, sounding almost bothered by the mayor’s praise.
The mayor nodded and then left them to go mingle. Kyle’s hand left her back, and he stepped in front of her, handing her a can of Coke. “You okay? Where are your parents?”
AJ tilted her head in confusion. “They’re chatting. So what’s with the concern on your face right now, Kyle? You won the play-offs. You’re off to the World Series. Come on, smile and celebrate with me.”
“Seriously?” he asked in disbelief as he reached up and removed the baseball cap from his head. Setting it on the table next to her, he shook his head.
“What do you mean seriously?”
He laughed at her question. “You honestly didn’t see the way Devon Easton was looking at you?”
AJ’s brows furrowed. “Looking at me?”
“Yeah. You know he’s just one of the many guys lining up for your time. He just gets to skip a few places because he has an office at city hall.”
“You’re insane,” she accused as she set her can of Coke down. “The mayor is not in some line, Kyle. That’s ridiculous because there is no line.”
Kyle glanced away for a moment, and mumbled, “Trust me. There’s a line.” Then his brown eyes found her. “I’m the very first in line.”
“Kyle.” She grasped his arm. “There’s no line.”
“There’s a line, Alexi. You just don’t see it. You don’t see how men look at you. You don’t see how beautiful you are. Or how kind you are. You don’t see it. You’re so unaware of anyone other than my brother. And Devon … of course you’d have the mayor of Boston infatuated with you. Is anyone immune to you, Alexi? Seriously, you’re going to get me and your father in a lot of trouble tonight. And if my brother didn’t have to go back to California today, trust me, you’d be getting him in a lot trouble, too.” He pressed his lips into a tight smile that she saw right through. It was still uncomfortable for him to accept that she had chosen to love Evan.
“You’re exaggerating.”
Kyle let out a heavy exhale. “And you have no idea what he would do to protect you. I’m sorry that I told him where you were. You wanted us to be brothers, and it was the only way to give you that. I didn’t want you to be sad anymore. I didn’t like the joy I found in his suffering when he called me every day to find out if you were okay. I’m so sorry, Alexi.”
“It’s okay, Kyle. I understand,” she said with a forgiving smile. Kyle had been the reason Evan found her. If it hadn’t been for Kyle, she would have never heard Evan tell her he loved her. To feel him and kiss him. To know that the love she had for him was reciprocated.
“Has he called?”
The one question she hoped no one would ask. Evan’s flight landed hours ago, but she had not heard from him. She knew it wasn’t an easy time for him to return to Stanford. On the drive to the airport, she asked if the allegations against his teammates could be true. Shame was written on Evan’s face as he admitted that some of the seniors on the team thought they were above the law. He didn’t want to believe that his teammates were capable of rape, but he wouldn’t support them if the evidence proved
they were guilty.
“No,” she said. “But I know he had to see his coach as soon as he returned to Stanford. I know this isn’t easy for him right now.”
Kyle nodded. “And you’re happy … with him?”
AJ dropped her hand from his arm and gave him a small smile. “Evan and I still have a lot to figure out. He had to return to California when we were just starting to express our feelings. But as soon as everything settles, I’m sure we’ll know where we stand. But enough about Evan and me …” Because it’s too hard to talk about him right now. “Let’s celebrate the fact that you might be a third-time winning World Series captain!”
The concern on his face fizzled away as a large smile splayed across his lips. “I was worried. We were behind for so much of the game. The boys worked hard the last two innings to win it for us.”
“They have a great captain.”
He shook his head. “No, Alexi. I happen to be part of an even greater team. Come on, let’s go celebrate with your parents. I’m so happy they made it today.”
AJ took in the large poster on the wall in front of her.
It depicted the different stages of a pregnancy.
Each trimester.
From fetus to newborn.
She swallowed hard.
Pregnancy.
It was one of the reasons she was sitting in her doctor’s office as she waited for her to return from an emergency phone call. AJ sat uncomfortably on the hard chair as she took in her surroundings. She could have gone to the clinic at Duke, but she couldn’t risk anyone knowing. At least with Dr. Livingston, she had confidentiality. AJ had seen the same doctor since she was thirteen.
The door suddenly opened, and AJ craned her neck to find the doctor sighing as she stepped inside the office and closed the door behind her.
“I am so sorry, Alex,” Dr. Livingston said as she shot AJ a small smile and then sat behind her desk. “First, welcome home. How is college?”
AJ appreciated her doctor’s small talk. Her visits were rare since she only saw her doctor when she was sick. “It’s great, Dr. Livingston. It was an adjustment, but I like it.”
“What college do you go to?” she asked as she powered up her computer.
“Duke University.”
“Go Blue Devils,” the doctor chanted with a smile.
“You went to Duke?”
The doctor shook her head. “My husband’s alma mater.”
“Oh, nice,” AJ said.
Dr. Livingston brushed her platinum blond hair behind her ear and looked at her. “So what can I do for you today, Alex? It’s been a while since your last checkup. You’re not sick, are you?”
AJ shook her head. The discomfort returned. Her throat suddenly felt dry, and her palms were clammy. She wiped them on her jeans and straightened her spine. “Actually, umm …”
Concern swept her doctor’s face. For as long as AJ had known her doctor, it surprised her to see only a few wrinkles around the doctor’s eyes and the corner of her mouth. Dr. Livingston aged well for a woman in her early fifties with a demanding profession. “Is everything okay, Alex?”
“Dr. Livingston …” She paused and took a deep breath. When she released it, she said, “Dr. Livingston, I had unprotected sex.”
Nothing.
The concern on her doctor’s face vanished.
Instead, a professional, taut expression took hold of her face.
“How long ago?”
“Four days ago was the first time.”
“There was more?”
“There was a second time. It was yesterday.”
The doctor nodded. “There was no condom for the second time?”
AJ shook her head. “I know this is going to sound so irresponsible but no. I didn’t think and neither did he.”
“Alex, protection is important. Not just to prevent an unwanted pregnancy but also to protect you against STDs. Was there more than just one guy?”
Horror climbed up her spine.
The thought of being with someone other than Evan made her sick.
So did the hint of disappointment in her doctor’s voice. AJ had always been responsible. She always made sure she was. She was careful not to do something stupid that could be printed in the papers.
AJ strived to be a role model.
Being pregnant at eighteen was not what she planned for herself.
She made a stupid mistake that could affect her future.
Sex with Evan wasn’t a mistake.
It was sex without any form of protection that could affect everything.
AJ’s shoulders sagged. “No, Dr. Livingston. The first time I had sex with this guy was my first time. It’s only been him and no one else.”
The doctor’s eyes widened. “I’m so sorry, Alex. I didn’t mean to insinuate anything. It’s my job to ask so I know all the facts. I have to know your sexual history. I didn’t mean to sound like I was accusing you of having multiple partners. There is no shame in having a healthy sex life so long as you’re being careful. So four days ago was your first time?”
“It was.”
“Do you know if he was clean?”
She shook her head. “No. I know that sounds so stupid right now. But I trust Ev—him. I trust him. He’d never put my health in jeopardy, and he would be honest with me if he wasn’t. He did tell me that he hadn’t been with anyone during his time at college.”
Understanding flashed in the doctor’s blue eyes. “Alex, there’s no judgment from me. As long as you’re being safe, that’s all I care about. You have a few options. First is emergency contraception. Since it’s been four days since the first time you had unprotected sex, a few options are out of the question. We need to draw some blood to test for STDs and pregnancy. I can prescribe you a morning-after pill called ella, which can be taken up to five days after unprotected sex and is more effective at your stage. Or we can insert the copper IUD, which has a failure rate of one percent and can be left in for future contraception. Of course, there are side effects and no method of contraception is one hundred percent effective in preventing pregnancy. Whatever option you take today, a follow-up pregnancy test is highly recommended if your period is late.”
AJ nodded, agreeing with everything her doctor suggested. An STD and a pregnancy test were her main priority. But she knew that not all contraception worked. If the test came back positive, she couldn’t harm the baby. “Dr. Livingston, I have a question.”
“Of course.”
“Could there be a chance that I’m pregnant right now?”
Her doctor pressed her lips into a fine line. After some time, she finally nodded. “There’s a chance you could be pregnant. I’ll send your blood for testing, and you’ll know tomorrow. I can still prescribe you the emergency contraception for you to take, but if you are pregnant, it won’t affect the embryo.”
Relief poured into her chest.
Sure, she didn’t want to be pregnant, but if there was a chance she was, she didn’t want to harm her baby.
“Thank you, Dr. Livingston.”
“I’m your doctor, Alex. I want what’s best for you. And I know that if I were to send you out with a prescription for emergency contraception, it would do more harm than good to you. I’ll have you take it here so that no one leaks this. You’re a smart young woman, Alex. News that you might be pregnant could harm the image you’ve worked hard to maintain. You’re a positive role model no matter what happens. Once we’ve done the tests, we can talk about you going on birth control now that you’re sexually active.”
A weight felt as if it had been lifted from her shoulders. “Thank you.”
“Just make sure you and Evan use protection next time.”
And there it was.
Her minor slipup from before hadn’t been so minor.
Dr. Livingsto
n caught it.
“I didn’t say—”
The doctor smiled. “You didn’t have to. If it wasn’t him, you wouldn’t have hesitated with his name. You two went to high school with my daughter. I know how much this town loves you both. You’re my patient, so you don’t have to worry about me telling. Just know that I’ve been hoping for you two to get together. Next time, condoms and a talk about both your sexual history. Okay?”
AJ felt hot all over with embarrassment. She couldn’t believe her doctor had always wanted her and Evan to get together. “Okay, Dr. Livingston.”
“Good,” her doctor said, getting up from her chair. “Let’s get these tests done.”
55 Cs
caesium
ALEX
Now
“The Red Sox need two more runs to become world champions. We need a hero. Salvereski is on second base with one more batter to go. What can Gilmore achieve? Will he write his name in the history books tonight? The Boston faithful think so. Come on, son, make us proud!”
“Alex, he’s about to step up to the plate,” Savannah, her roommate, said, pointing at the home plate.
Alex got up from her chair and glanced out to find him swinging his bat in preparation. This was his chance to make history. She watched him adjust his helmet and then glance out at the stands. When his brown eyes met hers, the air thinned in her lungs. Her heart squeezed so hard, she thought she was in pain.
She pressed her palm to her chest to signal she was with him and felt something cool against her skin. She glanced down to find a silver necklace around her neck. It was familiar but so unclear, as if she couldn’t tell what she was staring at through blurry eyes.
Alex blinked hard as tears ran down her cheeks.
Tears she didn’t understand.
She was happy.
She had been happy for almost a year.
Why am I crying?
“He’s about to bat,” Savannah informed.
Alex lifted her chin to find that his face was clearer.
She saw it.
Every heartbreaking detail of his sad expression.