“That right there is my cue to leave,” the agent said, then turned to give Jerrik a look. “I will be checking in on you. And don’t you dare think of skipping out early.”
Jerrik frowned at the other man. “Where would I go? How? Unless you’re leaving me the car.”
Tom scoffed. “You can be creative; don’t play with me, kid. And like hell I’m leaving you with my car.”
“You could have let me come with my own,” he pointed out.
“Yeah, no. That way, you would definitely run.” He turned to me with a wink and a smile. “Take care of my boy for me, would you? Sorry in advance if he causes any trouble. I’m sure deep, deep down inside, he’s good.”
Jerrik’s frown grew fierce, and my lips rose in a small smile, a little amused in spite of myself. Jerrik said something quietly, probably a curse, and the agent left, laughing as he went.
Then Jerrik and I were left alone, and whatever amusement I felt died quickly.
I was a little surprised when he broke the silence between us first.
“So, am I imagining things, or are you who I think you are?”
I stared at him with my lips pursed, unsure of how to go ahead with this now that I had him alone. I couldn’t exactly threaten him. If what I’d been hearing—and reading—of him as of late were true, he wouldn’t take to a threat well. He might even expose me out of spite because of it, and the last thing I wanted was to make him mad.
“Or are you just a doppelgänger? Long lost twin?” he went on when I took too long to answer, his eyes narrowing. “Are you Sharon?”
I couldn’t even be surprised. Of course, he would remember me when I would rather he didn’t, even with all the years that had gone by. Not that we’d ever been all that close, at best passing acquaintances, but it didn’t change that we did know each other.
“There’s no long lost twin, Jerrik. That only happens in the movies.”
He snorted and grinned, though it wasn’t a happy look. “So I was right. What are you doing all the way out here, Sharon?”
“None of your business,” I shot back almost immediately, then bit my lip, reminding myself that I was trying not to antagonize him. “I needed a job, and I got one here.” That was all he needed to know.
But his eyes narrowed on me like he knew that wasn’t all there was to it.
“Do you have luggage with you?” I asked, looking at him with a frown. I came out from behind the counter and waited. “I might as well show you the way now. I can leave a note, so someone else brings in your bags.”
He waved a hand over his shoulder. “Tom’ll bring my stuff in for me; he’ll probably just leave it here.”
I nodded. I reached behind the counter for a pad and pen and wrote down a quick note. The staff member I was supposed to be manning the counter with should be returning soon.
“It’s this way,” I told Jerrik, reaching behind the counter again to get his room key and handing it over to him.
I made sure our fingers didn’t touch as we passed the keys, and he obviously noticed by the sideways look he sent me.
We were silent on the way, as I was thinking of just what to tell him and how to keep my cover with him around. We got to his room too soon, I didn’t know what to say yet, and he stopped with me. He didn’t make a move to get inside the room, instead he turned to face me.
“What did you want to tell me?” he asked slowly. “There’s got to be something or you would have let me go on my own with directions instead of offering to show me, wouldn’t you?”
“It’s actually part of my job,” I said, mildly offended.
“Yeah, but see, I have a feeling you want to avoid me, or you would have said something about knowing me the second you recognized me. Isn’t that right, Sharon?”
I scowled at him. I wasn’t sure if he was just bluffing, but either way, he was spot on. Of course, I knew avoiding him wouldn’t be possible. I wouldn’t always be stuck at reception, and we could meet just about anywhere in the retreat. I had to take the chance to talk to him now or I would regret it later.
“Look,” I muttered, glancing around to make sure we were alone, then stepped closer to Jerrik and met his gaze. “I got the job here because my employers think I have a clean history. They have standards for their employees, and I just kept my past life private.”
There wasn’t anything that big in my background, at least not the kind that would put me on a cop’s radar. But the service industry tended to be particular about employees and the retreat was probably even stricter than most hotels would be. If anyone found out about my background and the kind of shit I got up to when I was a misguided teenager, I would probably lose my job.
Jerrik’s eyebrows shot up, and he looked almost entertained. “So you lied.”
I winced, not wanting to think of it that way, but knowing he wasn’t entirely wrong either. “Yeah, Jerrik, you could say that. I have a good thing going on for me here and I don’t want that to change just because you’re here.”
He eyed me for a moment in consideration, and I hoped he wasn’t just thinking of a way to screw me over. I didn’t mention that he clearly had things to hide himself. It was the only possible reason he was at a retreat in the first place, acting like it wasn’t his idea to be there at all. But I didn’t want to make him think I was trying to blackmail him, because he might get the idea to do the same to me.
Then his eyes lit up in a way that I didn’t like, and I resisted the urge to take a step back. I realized when he took one forward that I should have anyway.
“So, what you’re saying is, you want me to keep your secrets?”
I arched an eyebrow at his expression, looking almost happy with himself. “And I’ll keep yours,” I said, and stared back, unblinking.
He reacted, his eyes going cold for a second, his lips flattened, but the look was gone almost immediately, as he realized I was challenging his threat and giving him one back.
“Because we both have secrets we want kept, and I’m asking, Jerrik, keep your mouth shut.”
“Maybe,” he muttered, “but you need this job, don’t you? I don’t need to be here. I could probably talk my way out of staying, but what happens to you, hmm?”
I scowled at him. I would be out of a job, for one thing, and I would be out of a home. I’d have to move somewhere else, look for another job, start anew.
“Jerrik, look. I’m asking for a favor, and I know you don’t have to listen to me, but please don’t mention to anyone that we knew each other before today. It would only bring up questions that neither of us want to be asked.”
His lips pursed, and I felt a spike of anger go through my chest. If he didn’t listen to me, what could I do? I didn’t want to start packing to leave. The anger burned in my chest, resentment mingled with it as I felt my hands begin to shake. Why did he have to come here and ruin things for me in the first place?
“What will you give me?” He asked it like a naughty child, one that thought he was being cute.
I scoffed as I looked at him. Did he really think that would work? The anger began to fade away and made space for my confusion as I blinked at him.
“Excuse me?”
He took another step forward, and I took one back instinctively. We repeated the dance, until I felt my back hit a wall, and I jumped in surprise. Jerrik stood in front of me, not touching but a little too close for comfort.
“I’m just wondering what this job of yours is worth to you. See, I didn’t want to come here, I was told to come here. Now, I’d like to have a little fun during my stay, or I’ll probably die of boredom.”
“There’s plenty to do around here; you don’t have to be bored,” I said quickly, deliberately side-stepping his meaning.
A slow smile grew on his face, and I hated to admit it, but he was attractive, and that smile only made him even more so. His brown eyes gave me a look I could only describe as one of desire, and I felt my breath hitch in my throat. He leaned closer so I could feel his mint
y breath wash over my face, and all I could look at were those eyes.
“That is true, there’s plenty to do. But do you want to know what I want?” he murmured, turning on his charm. His body inched just a little closer to mine, and I could feel his warmth. “I’d like to have you in my bed, doing some not so innocent things. I’ve always wanted you, Sharon. Want to give me a chance?”
My body trembled because of his nearness, that look in his eyes and the tone of his voice, low and husky. I’d always wanted him too, but I’d never admit it. Not to him.
I wasn’t that easy.
I pressed my hand to his chest and gently pushed him back. His eyes widened a little in surprise, but he backed up, and I moved quickly away from the wall.
“We are not doing that, Jerrik,” I said point blank. “And now, if you don’t mind, I have work to do.”
I turned my back on him and made my way back to the front desk and sanity.
3
Jerrik
I woke up with a low pounding in my head, a familiar one. Not quite a hangover, but close. I shifted and realized I must have passed out in my clothes, on top of the covers. I rolled onto my back, cracked open my eyes and looked down at myself before wincing.
All at once, arriving at the retreat came back to me. The second I made it into my room, I refused to go out, only opening the door for my luggage and for the sake of meals. I had, thankfully, been allowed to pack for myself, and I’d packed plenty to keep me busy along with my clothes.
I was still in the tank top and jeans from two days ago, and I grimaced. I could have done with a shower, but instead, I slid off the bed and squinted my eyes around the room until I found what I was looking for, which was a half empty open bottle of whiskey on the floor a few steps away. If I drank it before the hangover set in, I wouldn’t have to deal with it. I’d gotten pretty good at avoiding hangovers in the past several months, though the binge drinking was probably hell on my liver.
A knock on the door brought a scowl to my face. The staff had come before to try and get me to come out, and every time I gave the same answer, but they kept coming back.
“Excuse me, sir, but I’m afraid you’re going to have to leave,” a voice called, making me roll my eyes.
“You’ve missed your sessions the past two days already; you can't miss the third day.”
“I’m busy,” I shouted back. “So just piss off and leave me alone! I paid for it, so what’s your problem?”
It was the staff’s job to check in on me, I knew that. No matter how much I insulted them, someone was always back to get me. But no one told me about these ‘sessions’ or that they were mandatory. After all, this had been the compromise to locking me up in a rehab center, because I didn’t need rehab, no way. I just had a bit of a problem. I wasn’t an alcoholic or anything, so I was fed up of everyone treating me as if I were one.
Instead, the label and Tom thought I needed to relax. I could have told them it was pointless.
I expected to be left alone. They hadn't tried too hard before, but another round of knocking came, this time louder, faster and decidedly annoying.
“Sir,” the voice came again, sounding stern. “I’m going to have to ask you to open the door, please. You are required at today’s session. If you would only attend even for a few minutes, you would see it’s not that bad.”
I snorted and thought I heard a touch of desperation in his voice. So I ignored it.
Just because I was stuck here, didn’t mean I was going to do what they all wanted me to do. Tom, the label, all the people that worked at the retreat, they could go fuck themselves and leave me alone. It was really all I needed.
Bastards!
I might not want my career to be over, but it wasn’t like I would be out on the streets if it did. I knew I got out of control sometimes; I couldn’t help it. But so what? It was my life to live as I pleased. No other label might sign me, but I knew if I hired the right people, I could go solo if I wanted.
Only, I didn’t want to. It was too much like work. So I was stuck.
I moved back to the bed and sat down heavily, taking another heavy gulp of alcohol.
“If you don’t come out of this room today and join the session, I’m afraid I will have to contact your agent.”
That made me freeze. And really, I should have known.
Quickly, I set the bottle down and got up, walking straight for the door. I hadn't drunk enough to start up a buzz yet, though my head didn’t hurt at all anymore. Speed walking across the room made me feel a little nauseous, but I ignored it as I yanked the door open and glared at the worker that stood there.
He looked startled when I abruptly opened the door, his eyes widening and lips parting before he tried to look nonchalant, a feat he wasn’t really managing.
“What did you just say?” I said slowly and saw the man gulp.
“It was a requirement of you staying here, set by your agent and your… employer.”
I smiled, and the guy swallowed again, looking almost afraid. I wondered if everyone knew who I was and who I worked for, and the reason why I was there in the first place. Obviously, both Tom and the label would have tried to keep some things under wraps, but there were leaks and rumors got around.
“I didn’t know about this,” I said. “Why wasn’t I informed that you’re all supposed to be keeping tabs on me?”
“Um, I only know what I was told. That you’re supposed to attend the sessions, and if you miss too many, he is to be called immediately.”
I wanted to curse but held myself back. Really, I should have expected it. Like it would all be so easy; they leave me alone and I do whatever I want.
Right.
“You don’t need to call anyone. Just point me to where I’m supposed to go and I’ll get ready now.”
He cleared his throat. “Actually, I’ll wait for you here and just take you.”
I sighed heavily, but yeah, that wasn’t a surprise either. I glowered at the man and he flinched again, but he had better control of his expression this time.
“Fine,” I muttered and closed the door in his face, then turned back to the room.
My nose wrinkled in more disgust as I took it in, even though it was my fault.
Gross.
Bottles and cans of beer were left on almost every flat, horizontal surface in the room. I’d gone through that stash before I started on the whiskey. I still had two more bottles, though at the rate I was going, I wondered how long it would all last. Probably not that long. Along with that, ashes and cigarette butts, some barely burned, others burned to the butt, littered the table. Some were left in the empty bottles, probably some of the cans too. I didn’t remember making all that mess, but I’d been too preoccupied with drinking and smoking to pay much attention.
I should probably clean the place up, but this wasn’t my fucking problem. They were paid to clean up. I didn’t even want to know the price tag on the room, but there was no doubt that it was a lot more than a hotel suite.
I didn’t know if the retreat worked like a regular hotel, but then again I didn’t care. I ignored the mess and headed into the bathroom. I went to take a quick shower and to change into something different, a tight, short-sleeved T-shirt and a pair of cotton pants.
Ten minutes later, I was back at the door and opening it. As much as I didn’t like following orders and getting pushed around, I didn’t want to get myself into any more trouble either. The guy was still there waiting for me, and he led me silently.
“Can I ask just what this session is?” I asked after a few minutes of silence.
He started, then turned a confused look my way. “Uh, sir. This is a yoga retreat. You’ll be going to a yoga class session,” he said matter-of-factly.
I cursed under my breath, changing my mind and wanting to turn back. But before I could turn to leave, the guy stopped and sent me a polite smile. He was probably cursing at me behind that look though.
“The practitioner overseeing your
session will be here soon. Please wait for them.”
He was gone before I could voice a word of protest, and I looked around with a growl. The room was large and sparsely furnished, the walls in a dark cream color with wood flooring. There were two sets of large windows that let plenty of sunlight into the room. A few stools set around the room held potted flowers and statues, some mats were rolled up and set against the wall, but that was it.
“Damn,” I growled to myself.
Why was I attending a yoga session of all things? I mean, apparently it was a yoga retreat, but still, I didn’t do yoga. All that finding your inner peace shit didn’t appeal to me or I would have tried that shit on my own. But then, if I didn’t try, I was pretty sure I’d get hell for it from Tom, and I was sick of him nagging me.
I looked around when no one followed me immediately, tempted to just leave and hide back in my room. So what if they told on me to Tom and my ‘employer’?
But then my thoughts stalled when I saw someone walk in the room. It was Sharon, and suddenly, this didn’t feel all that bad. She was technically part of the staff, but I wondered if they attended classes too.
“Fancy seeing you here!”
Her eyebrows shot up as she slowly walked over to me. “Shouldn’t that be my line? You know classes are daily, right? Though I think your schedule is a little different. You have a few off days.”
I scowled. “I haven’t seen anything like a schedule, so I don’t know what you mean.”
She waved a dismissive hand at me. “Your agent must have given it to you, because he was pretty particular about you meeting your schedule. I met him after I left you when he dropped off your bags, and he told me about it.”
Well, I couldn’t say it was impossible. I did a lot of not listening when it came to Tom and I just couldn’t be bothered.
“I don’t want to be here,” I said bluntly. “I think this is all a waste of time I could have used for something else, like writing more songs.”
Rockstar Retreat Page 2