If Wishes Were Curses

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If Wishes Were Curses Page 2

by Janeen Ippolito


  “Coming right up.”

  I sighed and tapped the countertop, glancing around the room and dabbing the sweat off my brow with a napkin. Weird. I hadn’t met anyone. What had I been so worried about? I’d barely gotten into the crowd when I felt like something was off. I had come back to the bar to regroup. It was bound to happen in a mixed human and Fae club. Still, I hadn’t made any connections or spoken to anyone. Why did I feel off-kilter?

  I couldn’t remember.

  Maybe the potion-making from earlier in the day had muddled my brain. Though my brother Gideon and I didn’t use nasty chemicals, magical or otherwise. Our side hustle was strictly all-natural and even organic, depending on the type.

  “Here ya go.” Jack set down the glass of clear fluid and dropped a cap in it, that immediately fizzled. A bit like anti-buzz antacid. Was she avoiding my gaze? Nah, it had to be the lighting. “Drink it, then head to the lounge on your left. I saw our mark walk in there with a woman.”

  “How did you know it was him?”

  She grimaced. “They stopped by here for a drink. He’s clearly all human but laying the shifter hints on thick.”

  Her words brought back some of my focus, and I took a gulp of seltzer. “Was the woman human or Fae?”

  “Smelled mostly human. Maybe a bit of firebird in her.”

  Great. Someone who could cause a spark, or more, if they were annoyed. I had to lock this one down. I drained the rest of the glass in a rush of cold and shook off the brain freeze. “Got it.”

  I headed toward the red-saturated lounge, carpeted with thick crimson rugs. Low, tan couches hunkered in intimate corners around circular tables, collecting shadows for the odd make-out session. Shadelands was too high-class to allow anything more. Not that the Fae owners cared about humans in general, but the Magisphere Accords did acknowledge some human rights, including a human’s right to stumble out of a club unmolested.

  Thankfully, the mark and his lady friend weren’t in one of the face-sucking corners. Instead, they were settling down at a more public place in the center of the room. From the insistent line on the young woman’s lips, it had been her idea. Across the table, her companion looked far less happy.

  Well, they were both going to be unhappy soon enough. I switched into work mode, letting what little magic I had flow out of me. Step one: get the girl out of the situation.

  “Oh gosh, I’m so sorry!” I stumbled over to their couch and flopped down next to the woman messily enough to grab her wallet from her small purse in the blink of an eye. “I’ve totally lost my phone. Can I look here real quick? Please?”

  The next moment, I teleported the wallet behind the bar where Jack would be sure to see it. I also stuck one of my business cards in the woman’s purse. I did matchmaking as a third job, and I knew this woman could use a little help. She had “small town country” written all over her tanned, round face and wide green eyes.

  The man cleared his throat. “Well, we were—”

  “Oh goodness, of course you can!” The woman nodded as she stood. “I’ll help you look. I’m Josie Framer.”

  “Allis. Thanks so much!”

  Come on Jack. Call her name.

  If only I had an earvine to confirm that Jack had gotten the wallet. But the curse-mark that blocked most of my magic also made it impossible for me to use magical tech.

  While I anxiously searched for my nonexistent phone, I dropped my shields again. Josie’s main desire was close to the surface: she wanted a guy. Preferably a shifter with some kind of fire nature, since she had an inclination toward flames herself. I filed the knowledge away in case Josie showed up and wanted matchmaking help instead of blatant trickery.

  “It looks like it isn’t here.” The man cleared his throat again. I glanced at him. He was built like a linebacker straight from the locker room at Heinz Field. Despite the potion he’d doused himself with, Jack’s nose was right: he didn’t have a drop of magical blood in him. And he really didn’t want Josie to find out until he’d gone as far as he could with her.

  This was definitely our magical poser. I just had to get him to admit it.

  Just then, the PA system crackled, and Jack’s voice spoke, “Excuse me, but would the lovely Josie Framer please come to the bar? We’ve found your wallet.”

  “My wallet?” She gasped, her hand flying to her chest. “How did I manage to lose that? I’m sorry, Doug. I need to go get it. I can’t believe I was such an airhead!”

  “It’s okay.” I got up so she could get off the couch. “Happens to everyone at one time or another. Jack, the barkeeper, will take care of everything.”

  Including cluing Josie in on the loser she was dating. She left in a flurry, and I settled down across from Doug, flashing him a smile and sifting through his desires. Someone naive and foolish, hm? Easily manipulated?

  My smiled widened. I could play that game.

  And I would win.

  Chapter 2

  You might be wondering why I didn’t just tase the poser and drag him out to Theiya’s police car. Well, the Fae court is notoriously fickle about laws. A human posing as a Fae is a no-no, regardless of what he’s doing to women. But a lot of Fae don’t care about that because if they start enforcing the rules of human-Fae fraternization, they would have to abide by those rules.

  Not much for rule-following, most Fae. I’m surprised Theiya doesn’t have a full head of gray hair from her enforcer work. But I try to make sure humans get some due process, even the creepy ones. Otherwise, what’s the point? It’s a slippery slope from tasing a human to shooting one in the leg for staring at me cross-eyed, to hiring a curse-monger for a few curses to hand out because I feel like it. Enough ballads have been written about that for many mortal lifetimes. And thanks to my curse, I knew what it felt like to be punished without any justice.

  Playing by human rules also means I have to come up with more proof to get anyone to listen to me. Fae prefer the “shoot and forget” method because it doesn’t require anyone to listen, so they can keep doing their own business. Bottom line, I need incontrovertible evidence to justify Theiya arresting this human.

  Sometimes I wonder why I bother getting involved. Why I wasn’t pursuing matchmaking full-time instead of taking on romantic investigation jobs.

  And then I remembered that Josie was at the bar, being steered in a better direction by Jack. She would be safe and would get a chance at finding true love. And the human trying to con her would be dealt with. Properly.

  I rubbed the curse-mark on my forearms again, the mark that left me without much of my magic. I didn’t know the reasons, just that my parents had found love, and I’d come along. The Fae court was nervous around graylings in general because our magic was unpredictable, and a half-genie made them even more worried. But Mom refused to off me, and the court couldn’t force her because their own laws protected graylings who had not shown signs of being dangerous. So they mandated I have most of my magic blocked. Helping others find love—and stay out of dangerous situations—gave me a little peace. My own love life was doomed, so the least I could do was make sure no one got screwed over just because a lot of Fae have the romantic skills of jacked-up thirteen-year-olds with too much beauty, pheromones, and access to dangerous chemicals.

  Although some days, humans weren’t much better. Case in point: the over-muscled redhead staring at me in irritation. Operation disarmament, commence.

  I flashed him a wide-eyed grin and giggled. “Gosh, I am so sorry! This place is just so incredible. I’ve never gone somewhere like this.”

  “You haven’t?” Doug leaned forward, his blue eyes gleaming with fresh interest. “What brought a pretty little thing like you into this big, fancy club?”

  I leaned forward too and got a whiff of way too much body spray. “I’ve heard this place had … you know … Them here. I’ve always wanted to date one.”

  “Them?”

  “You know, the Fae.”

  “Ah, yes. Them.” He drew out the last
word, a drawl about as real as my fluffiness. What, did he think it made him sound more elegant? “And what would you do with one of them, if you found them?”

  “Oh, I don’t know. Probably say nothing.” I let my hands flutter nervously and called up a flush to my face while activating a voice recorder in the ring on my right hand. “I’ve heard... stories, you know. What they can do. Really good at kissing and—all those other things.” I bit my lip, affecting embarrassment like the innocent virgin I definitely was not. “Not that I’m the kind to really interest them. Fae women are way prettier than me.”

  At that, I sensed a jump in his desire. Revulsion filled me. Doug was all too ready to jump to someone new and insecure in hopes of a good time. Never mind that he was a lying snake. “Well now. I’d say you’re just as pretty as they are. And I would know.”

  Satisfaction filled me. Here was the clincher.

  I pitched my voice to breathless curiosity. “You would? How?”

  “I happen to be a dragon.” He leaned back again, arms sprawled over the top of his couch, chest popping out enough to show muscles underneath his green v-neck.

  “No!” I gasped. It was a genuine reaction. Doug was dumb enough to fake being a dragon. They didn’t appreciate impersonators. I was doing him a favor turning him over to Theiya. The dragons would have him for lunch otherwise. Literally, depending on the dragon. Extra crispy fried human or raw human tartare, if they were in a hurry.

  He smirked. “Don’t be afraid, my dear. I’m as safe as I want to be. I must confess, I

  do have an uncontrollable side with voracious…passions.”

  Voracious passions? Shifters did enjoy a good time in the sack, but so what? Clearly this guy had been reading way too many romances. I managed not to roll my eyes, and instead faked a titter of laughter. “Oh! Well… Oh my. I think… I’m getting a little dizzy, being in here. Is it warm in here? Can’t believe you’re a real dragonshifter.”

  “It’s overwhelming, I know.” Doug stood up, offering me his hand. “Allow me to escort you outside. I feel a special connection with you, and I am willing to explore it as much as you permit. I usually don’t offer such things, but you make my blood flame with desire.”

  I stifled a groan. Liar. He’d been trying to seduce the pants off me the whole time. Well, the skirt off me. Although, as the ever-present wedgie confirmed, I was still wearing panties. And they weren’t going anywhere except the laundry hamper once I finally got home and into a shower.

  “A breath of fresh air sounds amazing.”

  I took his hand and followed him through the bar. A quick glance revealed that Josie was gone, and Jack had clocked off as well. Satisfaction filled me. Success all around, and I had proof that Doug was trying to fake it as a dragonshifter. All I needed to do was get him outside, which he was already taking care of.

  Good job, Doug. Just keep making my life easier.

  We were near the door when a hand touched my bare shoulder. Featherlight and cool but carrying an indescribable sense of authority.

  “Excuse me. Do we know each other?”

  I groaned internally. The last thing I needed was a friend or a client blowing my cover. I couldn’t just disappear though. I needed to keep stringing Doug along.

  Maybe I could ignore him. Or get dragon-faker to help me. I looked up at Doug with my best pleading look, clearly saying save me, strong linebacker man.

  He obliged, popping out his muscles again in an alpha-male stance. “Begone. My lady needs some fresh air, and what passes between us is none of your concern.”

  “Are you sure?” Something in the other man’s polished words caught my attention. Kindness. Genuine concern. I sighed. Figures that I would stumble across someone who was actually honorable and trying to stop a skeevy seduction. “You don’t have to go with him. I can call you a ride, and you can return home safely.”

  His voice was firm and compassionate with an undertone of magic to clear away any fog Doug may have put me in. Impressive. Not many Fae had the balls to interfere with someone else’s conquest.

  This guy was worth checking out.

  I looked up into gray eyes set in a pale face framed by straight black hair. All black and dark red clothing, a bit old-fashioned with the vest, but tailored well. Then I got a peek at his teeth. Huh. A vampire rocking a classic semi-Victorian goth look instead of trying to blend in like so many did these days. And an honorable vampire? Wonders never cease. In other circumstances, I would have applauded his nobility, but right now I didn’t have time for it. I shook my head. “I’m fine! I trust him. We’re just gonna talk outside.”

  Telepathy wasn’t one of my powers, but I stared at the vampire hard and tried anyway. I got this. I’m not in danger. I have friends waiting for me. I’m not one of the droids you’re looking for.

  Over my head—gosh, he had to be six foot two, about two inches on the vampire—Doug added, “Yes, we’re fine. Leave us.”

  The vampire returned my stare, then nodded once. “Very well. Have a good night.”

  “Thanks! Laters!”

  The vampire gave me another quick glance as if trying to place me, but Doug the fake dragon was already dragging me out the door. No time to deal with some weirdly honorable goth type. Maybe I’d run into him later.

  My curse-mark was warming up again, burning and tingling all the way up to my head. My brain felt like it was on fire. I frowned. Had the mark ever done that before?

  We exited the club. Doug’s breath was a blast of alcohol on my nose and ear. “At last, we are free to explore.”

  Whatever I’d been thinking about vanished. Must not have been important.

  Doug eased me into the stream of night foot traffic in the Strip District. Then he pulled me into an alley so quickly he scattered a black bird who was sifting through a dumpster. He leaned close, his fingers trailing down my bare shoulders. “Such marvelous freckles everywhere.”

  “Oh, you like them? Awww.” I focused on the task at hand. I had to convince the guy I was into him enough to let Theiya sneak up behind him and arrest him. Doug might be faking as a shifter, but his firm grip proved that his muscles were all too real. He was a lot stronger than me. I didn’t want to try to bring him down in my clubbing clothes. Blood would mess up my outfit, and it wasn’t cheap.

  I smiled up at him dreamily. “I can’t believe I met someone like you.” I searched for something else over-the-top flattering to say. “Your hair...is it red because you’re a dragon?”

  Okay, I guess flaky-obvious would have to work instead.

  “Yes! From the heat of my fiery spirit.” He leaned forward, and I backed into the wall, seemingly overwhelmed by his manliness, but in fact needing a quick break from his body spray. “And I am compelled to tell you, because of this potent bond forming between us, that my true name is Fieross.”

  “Fieross?” At that, a laugh escaped me. Not a cute giggle but a short, barking laugh that completely broke character. No Fae ever dropped their true name on a first date unless they were suicidal. And shifters didn’t have true names. Fieross? He couldn’t come up with anything better? The human’s ignorance was insulting.

  Doug was too busy invading my personal space to notice my scorn. He pressed his body close, his lips inches from mine. “Yes. I only tell you because I truly feel that a mating bond is imminent between us.”

  “Oh wow. That is—”

  The human jolted as if zapped by a bolt of lightning. A second later, he fell to his knees and slumped face-first on the concrete.

  “—not how mating bonds work,” I finished.

  “Actually, sometimes they do. But not as often for dragons, and it has to be desired on both sides.” Next to me, Jack snorted. The kitsune had shed her male form for her true form. She wore her red hair cropped in a pixy cut that allowed her fox ears to peek out, and she was clad in leather and denim, standing three inches shorter than my five foot seven. Her delicate, scarred face curled in a grimace. “Glad we got this one off the streets
. People like him give shifters a bad name.”

  “Agreed.” Theiya strode toward us, clad like a plainclothes detective in slacks, practical dress shoes, and a green tunic. Her fingers glowed from the bolt of light she had shot. The light elves could create handy magical taser blasts from their fingers.

  “Did you just zap him from your car?” I raised my eyebrows.

  “It was convenient.”

  “Lazy.”

  Her brown skin turned almost pinkish, and she tucked a loose strand of hair behind

  one lightly pointed ear. “I liked the song playing on the radio. And this individual didn’t pose much of a threat.”

  “Yeah, well, he wasn’t trying to get up in your business.” I nudged Doug with the tip of my boot.

  Theiya looked unimpressed, her voice its usual clipped tone that came from growing up

  around Fae royals. “You only had to teleport away if he proved troublesome. You’re capable of that much.”

  “And blow my cover?”

  “Hey, you two, the job is done. We get decent consulting pay.” Jack hauled up Doug and hefted him over her shoulders. Shifter strength. Very convenient. “Al, you got the evidence, right?”

  “Right here.” I passed my ring to Theiya. “Everything you need to lock him up. And keep him from getting eaten.”

  “Thank you.” Theiya glanced at Doug with disdain. “Although this one might be of more value pacifying the water dragons in the three rivers. They do get cranky.”

  “Just because he’s a jerk doesn’t mean he deserves death. If it did, we’d have to toss three-fourths of the Fae community in the rivers as well.”

  “I disagree. The Fae would give the dragons a stomachache. They don’t deserve that.”

  Jack cleared her throat. “Uh, guys, before you start your Fae-human squabble, you know that girl we rescued inside? The one I told to stay put until we dealt with the situation?”

  “Yeah?”

  “She followed me out.”

  I glanced over Jack’s shoulder. My heart sank.

 

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