Leaning forward Jeanie felt a pinch in the top of her leg and as she placed her hand in her pocket she took out the engagement ring. It was beautiful and as she slipped it over her finger she shook her head in disgust as her fingers looked like two burnt chipolatas with a sparkly bit thrown in. Scrunching her face she took off the ring,” Mrs J Watson. Jeanie Rutherford Watson….umm think I’ll have to work on that...” Placing the ring back in her pocket she gathered the bits and pieces together and closed the tool box.
The old van beaten and rusted looked like her old man before he died and as she flung the back door open the creaks and groans sounded like him too. Continuing to fling everything inside she continued to think about her married name. Lost in thought she dropped one of the boxes on the hand and as she danced around the back of the workshop Jeanie looked at the snow. It was deep and treacherous and the cold clung to Jeanie’s clothes like a child to their mother’s apron strings. Negotiating the roads would be difficult but reaching the base in one piece was an adventure she looked forward to.
The snow had been cleared from the front of the base as she arrived and the security staff looked like tin soldiers frozen to their post. Making her way through the precession she remembered the engagement ring in her pocket and there was no way to conceal it everything would be checked before she was allowed through. Looking around frantically she popped it into her mouth trying to act as natural as she could.
After the usual checks and being escorted over to the garage Jeanie paid lip service to the private who had escorted her. His constant gripes about her sister had become normal conversation and under the usual circumstances Jeanie would forget to listen. This time he was pissed off and Iris had blown him off over a petty argument. Jeanie couldn’t speak in fear of swallowing the ring; wanting the one-way conversation to be over she nodded politely in all the right places.
“Will you talk to her Jeanie?” Jeanie turned sideways and spat the ring out into her hand, “Yes... Yes course.” smiling graciously to his request the young soldier disappeared from view.
Jeanie raced to her office deeply happy that she was now on her own she began looking for a hiding place for the ring. Nowhere in the garage seemed to be adequate or do the gem any justice and as she thought out loud she grabbed the chain that was tucked under the layers of clothing. “St Chris…..you’ve saved me before time to do it again,” her dad had bought the chain when she was confirmed and when he died she swore never to take it off.
Looking at both trinkets together she felt assured that now she was doing the ring justice. Concealing it back under her clothes Jeanie started to feel bad that she had only half listened to the private and she had no idea what she was supposed to say to Iris. Jeanie’s mind wandered she couldn’t concentrate as the feelings from last night sent shivers down her spine. Feeling the bump under her clothes felt strange compared to the flat St Chris and just knowing it was there was a constant distraction. Gazing at the ring on her chain she studied its intricate design and for the first time ever she felt all over the place and unable to focus on one thing for more than five minutes.
Walking through the yard the wind had began to howl around the open spaces and Jeanie had started to mumble to herself as she always did when she didn’t want to do something she knew she had to. As she got to the car her mumblings had begun to sound louder.
“Talking to yourself is a sign of madness!” it seemed familiar but Jeanie didn’t even move to see who had made the comment. She couldn’t concentrate and the questions had already started to circulate inside her head. “Where will we live?” Does he want children? What the fuck am I doing?????” Taking the oil filter off the questions screamed louder and louder everything was bubbling over and as she placed her hand around the filter she moved it the wrong way.
Jeanie started to swear knowing it was her fault and as the blood dripped from the deep cut in her palm she slid down the side of the car unable to comprehend her stupidity. Conceding defeat she started to look for a first aid kit but it was inevitable that a plaster wasn’t going to work. Releasing a groan she raised her head towards the sky as she new the only option was making her way around the medical wing and the potential for more lectures than she cared for.
The walk over seem to take an infinite amount of time and as her hand throbbed the cold had started to creep in and by this point the mumblings had turned into swearing and cursing at anything and everything.
Walking through the cold corridors Jeanie had noticed an influx of new recruits and more Americans. The grunts lined the corridors awaiting medical examinations and these poor cold young lads with nothing more than vests and boxers stood in the corridor waiting for a doctor to say, “Cough please.”
Lines of boys seemed to be misplaced all over the dimly lit corridors it looked more like a boarding school than a base and as Jeanie past her curiosity started to creep forward. As she gazed at the different ends of the lines the worried pale faces at the start and the jovial almost flirtatious end she wondered how relaxed she would feel and whether her reaction would be the same knowing that there was a good possibility of death waiting at the end.
Jeanie had seen it all on the base and just being around men quite a lot made her familiar with the antics and tactics that most of them used. Smiling again at herself she couldn’t believe she had actually fallen for it. “Jeanie, Jeanie, you ok?” Liz one of the nurses and a friend to one of her younger sisters had spotted her walking down the corridor.
“Yeah fine jus a small cut on my hand. Did it whilst on a service; I don’t think it’s bad.” Continuing to walk Liz checked Jeanie’s palm.
“It seems quite deep I will get one of the doctors to check you out wait here in this room!”
Liz took her in a small white office which in contrast to the corridors was bright and stark. Jeanie blinked in the light she looked as if she had just emerged from a darkened cave after twenty years and only just discovered electricity. Everything was white, floor, walls, bed and curtains.
Liz drew the curtain and started clucking like a hen trying to be polite Jeanie tried to listen; however with the speed Liz was talking she found it hard to keep up. The only bit that Jeanie really understood was that the wound would need to be cleaned and in the buzz Jeanie started to take first layer of clothing off. Liz instructed her to sit and obliging Jeanie did as she was told subconsciously she started to swing her legs feeling like she was going for a check up.
Looking around the room Jeanie stuck out like a sore thumb in contrast her grubby overalls and dirty coat made the room look whiter and it didn’t help with Jeanie’s concentration. As Liz came back for a second time this time she was pushing the contents of a medical tray.
“Right lets clean it up and shall we, your going to have to be more careful. How are Ivy and the new baby? Iris was telling me all about her” before Jeanie had time to speak Liz had already started a new conversation she could talk for Britain and more besides if you let her, “Umm it’s quite deep looks like you will need stitches I will get the Doc and you will be as right as rain.” With that she flirted out from the side of the curtain and disappeared down the hallway. Jeanie looked at her hand and shook her head in disbelief at how fast Liz could walk and talk.
Jeanie watched the clock obsessed with the time and unable to stop swinging her legs she counted the seconds by each swing. When fifteen minutes went by her impatience grew and she just wanted finish and go home. Without waiting Jeanie put her coat on.
“James Sorry??” stepping back he seemed shocked to see her.
“What are you doing here?”
Jeanie replied tentatively, “I’m here to service the General’s car. Why are you here?” James pulled the curtain around them,
“I’m the doctor on the barracks!”
“You enlisted then” James looked at her puzzled face knowing she could answer her own question and already satisfying her demand he replied,
“I had no choice there’s a war and I’m needed.
Are you ok?”
Jeanie paused looking at her palm, “Silly really not concentrating and cut my hand,” finishing the sentence she began to blush.
” Not concentrating, umm can’t think of any reason why?” James beamed at her response and the fact he had thrown her off guard made him feel at ease.
“No idea I hear it’s a new disease called doctor springing out of the woodwork and asking strange girl to marry them, I believe it’s catching” James laughed looking into Jeanie’s hand and as she winced as he looked deeper inside the cut.
“Needs stitches and tetanus. So does this disease come with symptoms?” giving a coy look he kissed her on the cheek, “I will be back in a minute don’t move!” Jeanie saluted and smiled to herself again.
James looked very handsome in his uniform and she couldn’t help but think about last night. Questions began to circulate again and again.
Was he mine????? Am I that lucky???
Jeanie began to count off the endless amounts of positives James threw at her, he’s funny, charming, sensitive, really good at making me feel comfortable and able to find my sarcastic comments quite endearing.
As James arrived back Liz had followed as he looked again at the cut in Jeanie’s hand Liz prepared the injection. Liz was still incessantly talking as usual and unable to see the chemistry which had started to build between doctor and patient.
Jeanie took interest in how James stitched her hand back together and was impressed at how delicate he was something that was still in the back of her mind from last night. Jeanie smiled to herself and as James looked up he smiled back thinking about the same thing.
Unaware of the glances Liz began to interrupt the moment, “ Doctor I believe you’re single and new in town, so I believe it’s my duty to show you around and possibly look in on the local dance at the Parish rooms, so what do you say?”
James didn’t say a word or take his eyes off Jeanie and by this time she was glowing with his advances which where obvious to see. Liz couldn’t help but notice and responded brutally.
“Her, your seeing her! She’s the fat unattractively disgusting engineer from a group of seven sluts for sisters and your turning down me for her!!” Liz instantly knew her outburst could have her reprimanded but at that point she couldn’t keep it in.
“Nurse I suggest you take you deluded response and minor intellect out of my cubical before you do something you can’t apologise for. Do not speak to her or me in the same way do you understand?”
Before the door had closed on Liz’s departure James had already sat down and continued to patch up Jeanie’s hand.
“James” Jeanie said with a sympathetic air, “Thank you for defending me and my family but I also have to agree with Liz in some minor details about what you see in me? I know people say it’s not just about looks it’s personality but I only have one is that going to be enough?”
James continued to bandage her hand “I need to give you the tetanus please drop your trousers and bend over the bed” the flirtatious innuendo at the start of the conversation had dramatically disappeared as he spoke and without a quiver of humour Jeanie did as he said. After the injection she fastened and adjusted herself and without conversation and moved gingerly towards the door.
Standing James moved quickly before Jeanie could slide around the corner and disappear.
“Where do you think your going?” he closed the door gently coaxing her back into the room.
“Back to work” James looked at her unable to comprehend why she would agree to a petty minded nurse.
“Take a seat back on the bed I haven’t finished.” Jeanie again did as she was told.
“Listen to me now. I know you have asked and I also know you sometimes need direct answers so here it is. I am a thirty five year old man and I have had sex with twenty two women in my life and I have had three long term relationships all ending in disaster. I have been engaged once before and it fell through as I started working at Rutherford Metals. At that time I was an arrogant, insensitive pig with no real experience of what real life was not for the everyday man. My mentor told me a few home truths and he refused to work with me until I knew how to appreciate a fellow working man. He sent me to your father who indeed taught me a lot and then it all changed. You know why,” Jeanie shook here head intent on listening,
” I met an amazing person who was more real, who had time, patience, respect and love for everything she did. She’s intelligent, talented, ambitious and loyal and she has the biggest heart I have ever seen and she frightens me to death.
I didn’t understand and couldn’t believe that this woman was covered in grease and oil everyday and loving it because of the gratitude and dedication she had for her family. From that point nothing was the same my patients where brother, aunts, cousins to me and they needed to be treated the same. My relationship failed as I changed because I realised I was marrying her because it was expected of me not because I wanted to or was that much in love with her.
This person changed me even though she never asked for anything in return she was always willing to give more. I used to admire her confidence especially with her people. Throughout all these qualities she still has no idea of how beautiful she is.” James paused, unfolding his arms which had been pinched tight.
” The other thing you should know is on the evening your father died I went back to the factory. I saw you taking a shower and I couldn’t take my eyes off you. I’d never seen someone with so much devotion for her family and you still had the passion to keep everything going even if that meant you had to be their after your father died.
You’re the most beautiful woman I had set eyes on and even in grief you kept strong for everyone else. I needed so much to speak to you I couldn’t get you out of my head or heart.
I made love to that girl last night and I have never felt like this before. I cannot concentrate, I’m smiling uncontrollably. I never expected being this close to you so soon and I just want to love you. I would have given my career, my life and everything just to have you. I understood with the circumstances you insisted….you insisted I go and live if not for myself for you. I knew that and that’s why I’m here Jeanie, I’m here because I don’t feel like a whole person unless your with me, you are my dream and it didn’t take me long to realise it. Catherine….I’ve talked about Catherine to you and I realised after cheating on her for the second time that love shouldn’t feel empty. Until knowing you I don’t think I’d ever realised what it was or how to give it.
I can remember my first day at the factory on my first day I remember you saying something along the lines of my people are not as educated as you but they have something I will never have. Until I learn that this is just a man and I am just a woman our lives will always be portrayed as futile and not important enough to save. We all bleed and feel Doc just on different pay grades. In here it makes no difference if you fuck up we don’t kill people. If you fuck up it’s because you’re an arsehole and not worth respecting. Do you remember that?”
Biting her lip Jeanie nodded unable to reach eye contact James stepped closer.
“I remember those words like Shakespeare had written them because they were honest, decent and true. I did at first think who the hell are you to talk to me like that. Lying in my bed that night I couldn’t help but think about what you said. I love you for your honesty and I love you for your grace. It is time to believe that in all my life I have never wanted anyone the way I want you…...”
Jeanie looked at the floor unable to comprehend, she didn’t realise those days had meant so much and when they kissed the burden of her family had just taken over everything.
James softly put his hands around the sides of her face, “I love you Jeanie Rutherford.” Jeanie closed her eye’s she had dreamed about a night in shining armour to take her away and make her life better however something still seemed to good to be true.
He wasn’t running away in fact he was standing defending her honour and all she could
do was doubt him.
” James I have listened but I don’t think I’m hearing it. Last night was wonderful…I’ve never had anyone touch me the way you did. I’ve been so lonely…I don’t mind admitting it I just don’t want to get this confused. I remember working with you James and you’re a crap engineer but we became close friends but I always thought...”
” What did you think. That you weren’t good enough for me?”
Jeanie nodded and took hold of his hand placing it on her chest,
” My heart is racing James this scares me. You’re a doctor I was an engineer’s daughter still am. I’m covered in grease, shit and god knows what else to make ends meat but you, your this figure this extremely handsome doctor with your black hair and deep blue eyes and you’re just that fantasy icon that girls like me dream about.
James last night doesn’t seem real this whole affair whatever you want to call it… Listen I learnt that you came back for me. Why me of all things? I am what I am James this, this to me all just seems too good to be true you seem too good to be true….”
” What do I have to do to prove I love you Jeanie. I sacrificed everything for you I don’t….I don’t want to loose you I can’t and I won’t.
I understand this is quick and rushed and possibly too much I just want you to love me like I love you. Also please stop putting me on a pedestal as I have done lots of things I regret especially to the people I’m supposed to love and I don’t want to do that anymore. Let me prove to you…..please at least give me a chance.”
Jeanie stepped down from the bed and sat James down on the chair trying to hear his words with sincerity.
“I’ve been in a toxic relationship and I’ve never been in love…but I’m imagining it should feel like this. Please just give me some time….”
As Jeanie walked away James grabbed her hand pulling her onto him, kissing her he pulled at the loosely fastened shirt and as he kissed her collar bone Jeanie closed her eyes. She didn’t want him to stop, just as she didn’t want to leave him that morning. Kissing her fervently Jeanie held on tightly and as the kiss reached her mouth she rested her head on his.
In any ordinary life (In any oridnary Book 1) Page 4