~~~
Jake lay on his back, staring into the darkness, his hands interlocked behind his head. How could he bear spending the next forty years without Maggie? Before she’d come back into his life, he’d resigned himself to being alone. He’d been content, filling his life with his work and coaching. Now, none of that was enough. He wasn’t just alone. He was lonely.
As he rolled over and punched his pillow, the phone rang. He scooped the receiver off the night table and mumbled, “Hullo.” At the sound of Roxanne’s voice, he flipped on the light and rubbed his eyes. “What’s up?”
“I’m not sure. I had the strangest conversation with Maggie, and something just hit me.”
“Why’d you call her?”
“I wanted to apologize about the letter.” His ex-wife sighed. “You know she’s really a very gracious person.”
“Yeah, I know.” He swallowed the lump clogging his throat. “She’s pretty damn near perfect.”
“Well, something struck me as odd after I hung up. I’d told her I was getting married and that I hoped to have a baby.”
He swung his legs over the side of the bed and sat up. “Yeah, so?”
“It wasn’t what she said, Jake. It was the way she said it. I think she might’ve been crying. Did you tell her I was moving in with Chris?”
Twisting his lips, he tried to recall if he’d mentioned it. “I don’t remember. Alex probably did, though. What are you trying to tell me, Rox?”
“I’m wondering if she’s under the impression that you and I are reconciling. When I told her about my plans to have another child, she said she was sure you must be thrilled.”
He stared silently at the receiver a moment. It all made sense. “Thanks. I appreciate you letting me know.”
Smiling, he hung up the phone. Some psychologist he was. One of the first things he learned as a clinician was to pay close attention to more than just a person’s words. All along, the vibes he’d gotten from Maggie said she still had strong feelings for him. If that was the case, maybe when she’d emphatically refused to get involved in a loveless marriage, it’d been his love she’d considered missing.
He pulled on his clothes and scribbled a note for Alex and Emma. At twelve-thirty, he pulled up in front of Maggie’s condo. He pressed her doorbell and frowned when he didn’t hear it ring inside.
Damn it. She must not have reconnected the bell. He scanned the dark windows in the surrounding units. If he pounded loud enough to wake her, he’d disturb half her neighbors, too.
~~~
Maggie rolled over and pulled the pillow over her head to block out the annoying tapping sound. When it grew louder, she sat up in a daze and threw back the covers. Jerking up the blinds, she found Jake standing on the opposite side of the glass.
“What in the world are you doing here at this hour?” She lifted the window, and the sweet scent of the flowers she’d planted drifted in with a cool breeze that made her shiver. The temperature had dropped drastically.
“Let me in, Maggie.”
“Why should I?”
“Because we’ll wake your neighbors if you don’t.” Thunder echoed in the distance, drowning out the crickets’ chirping. “And in any second, I’m going to get soaked.”
“It would serve you right,” she said, raising the screen. “I guess you’re taking lessons from your son now, huh?”
He hoisted himself up onto the windowsill and climbed in. “Actually his antics did give me the idea. You haven’t reconnected your bell. I didn’t want to wake everyone in the complex by pounding on your door.”
Once he closed the window and blinds, he snapped on the light. His gaze raked her body, and a warm flush crept up her neck as he studied the pale pink, slinky nightgown Dan had bought for her right before he’d been killed.
Her husband never had the chance to see her in it, so she hadn’t had the heart to wear the nightie. But tonight, she’d hoped that wrapping herself in his gift would help ease her heartache and comfort her. Instead, sliding into bed by herself, wearing something so seductive, had simply made her feel even more alone.
Jake’s ardent gaze chased away the chill she’d gotten. He smiled and tucked his finger under the slender strap at her shoulder and trailed a burning path down toward her breast. “I like the nightgown,” he whispered roughly. “A lot.”
She shivered again, except this time it was from his feathery touch. “Dan bought it.”
“His taste in lingerie was as good as it was in women.”
She shoved Jake’s hand away. “Why are you here?”
His mouth tightened as he reached up again and caressed her face as if he were memorizing its contours. “I came to get some answers.”
“At almost one in the morning, you want to play a game of twenty questions?”
“Yes.” His mouth curled in a crooked grin. “And the only rules to the game are that I ask the questions and you answer them—truthfully. Do you think you can handle that?”
That all depended on what he wanted to know. She shrugged her shoulders. “Why would I want to?”
“Ahhh, Maggie.” He threw his hands up and heaved a disappointed sigh. “You broke the rules already. I’m supposed to ask the questions. You’re supposed to answer them.”
“I don’t want to play this game.” She turned away from him.
Tilting her face toward him, he gazed into her eyes. “Why, do you have a deep dark secret?”
“Everyone has secrets.”
“When we get to anything you think is too confidential, you can just plead the Fifth.”
“What is it you want to know so badly it can’t wait until tomorrow?”
He stepped closer and pressed his lips to her temple. The fragrance of his spicy after-shave tantalized her senses. He scattered a series of kisses over her forehead and whispered, “Did you love me nineteen years ago?”
Somehow he’d managed to zero right in on one of the questions she didn’t want to answer. She silently looked up at him from under her lashes while he threaded his fingers through her hair.
He waited several moments and cupped her cheek in his palm. “You haven’t answered me, Rosebud. I really need to know. Did you love me?”
Her voice came out thick and barely audible. “Yes.”
Brushing her mouth with his, he murmured, “Have your feelings changed toward me?”
Why did he persist in torturing her like this? She closed her eyes. In the last month, she’d come to love him ten times as much as she ever had. She nodded almost imperceptibly. “Yes, a great deal.”
He drew back from her, wearing a puzzled frown, then a pleased expression washed over his face. “Oh. So then you won’t mind telling me how your feelings have changed.”
She pulled away and spun her back to him. “Yes, I would mind very much.”
Sliding one arm around her waist, he yanked her back against him and settled his mouth on the nape of her neck. He nibbled his way to her ear and nipped at its lobe. “Why is that?”
Her breath caught as he his hands cupped her breasts. “Because you’re asking me to be the only one to become vulnerable.”
He blazed a trail of wet open-mouthed kisses over her shoulder while he slid his hands over her body, warming her with the heat of his hands. He lightly pinched her nipples and breathed softly in her ear.
She shouldn’t let him do this. He was getting married, and he was just using her in the interim.
He spun her in his arms and yanked her urgently against him. “Would you consider our game more equitable if you were asking some of the questions?”
“Yes.” She moaned softly, arching her back as his mouth feasted hungrily on the sensitive flesh of her throat.
Shoving her nightgown’s bodice aside, he dipped his head and licked her aching nipples. “What question would you like to ask me?”
Question? She couldn’t think when he had his mouth and hands on her like this. “Why do you keep making love to me when you really want Roxanne?”<
br />
“Do I?” He lifted one eyebrow a fraction as he scooped her up and gently laid her on the bed. In seconds, he stripped every stitch of clothing off his perfect muscles.
Closing her eyes, she blocked out the mesmerizing sight so she could concentrate. “Yes. Why else were you planning to get back together with her before you found out I was pregnant?”
He crawled onto the bed and moved over her, lowering his mouth to her exposed breast again. As much as she wanted him, she refused to take part in his infidelity. She wouldn’t respect herself if she slept with another woman’s fiancé.
When she tried to push him away, he captured both her wrists in the vice-like grip of one of his hands and pinned her arms over her head. A tiny whimper welled up from her chest as he closed his lips over the tip her breast.
Tracing his tongue around her nipple, he flicked at it and asked softly, “What makes you think my ex-wife and I are reconciling?”
Maggie drew in a sharp breath at his exquisite torment and struggled to free herself. “Because I heard you tell her on the phone how much you and Alex were looking forward to her moving back. Right before you told her you love her.”
He lifted his head and cupped her face in his palm, staring intently into her eyes. “Listen very carefully, Sweetheart. I don’t want there to be any confusion. I am very happy my ex-wife will be part of Alex’s and my life again. I love Roxanne and always have. She’s the mother of my child and a good friend. However—I am not now, nor have I ever been, in love with her.”
“You’re not?” Maggie did a double take, completely dumbstruck.
“It was the whole reason my marriage broke up. I never loved her the way I should have. Remember I told you I’d done something that drove my wife to use drugs?”
“You told me the details of your marriage weren’t any of my business.”
He enfolded her in his arms. “That’s because I didn’t want to admit I hadn’t been able to forget you. And knowing I couldn’t tortured Roxanne. Whenever I went to bed with her, I ultimately ended up making love to you in my fantasies.”
Oh, Lord forgive her. She’d done the same thing, imagining Dan was Jake. Pretending she was with him had been the only way she’d been able to give herself to her husband on their wedding night.
“If that’s the case, then who’s Roxanne marrying?”
“I think I told you she’s been sleeping with Chris.”
Yes, he had. And Maggie had been so convinced Jake would hurt her again she’d forgotten that vital tidbit of information.
She touched his face in wonder. He’d actually loved her all that time? “Why did you marry Roxanne if you weren’t in love with her?”
“Because”—he kissed her gently—“I thought you were lost to me. I decided if I couldn’t have the passion I’d felt with you, marrying a good friend was the next best thing.”
Maggie buried her face in his chest. “I married Dan for exactly the same reasons. He hoped to help me forget you, except I never did completely. The only way I could ever get really excited or come with him was to fantasize I was with you.”
Jake ground his lips into hers in a demanding kiss and murmured against her mouth, “Maggie, I’m so sorry. All these years I’ve been caught between loving you and hating you for something you never did. You didn’t deserve my resentment. Can you ever forgive me?”
“I already have.” She rested her head in the hollow of his shoulder. “Can you forgive me for thinking the worst of you?”
Pressing his lips to her forehead, he whispered, “I have a confession to make.” He gently stroked the length of her spine and planted a light kiss on the tip of her nose. “The night of Alex and Emma’s wedding, I think deep in my heart I was hoping to get you pregnant again.”
She turned her face into his chest. “Please, Jake, I can’t let myself start hoping I won’t lose our baby. It’ll hurt too much when I do.”
“I think you should see an obstetrician.”
“Okay. I’ll call Dr. Brennan first thing tomorrow.”
~~~
Now he knew how his son felt. Jake’s chest tightened at the thought of his good-looking neighbor examining Maggie. The possessive feelings were unreasonable, but the green-eyed monster gnawed at his insides, all the same.
He would never try to tell her which doctor she should use. On the other hand, he wasn’t above influencing her with a little gentle persuasion.
Slipping his hand between her legs, he stroked her and nuzzled her ear. Her hot breath stirred the fine hair on his neck as she kneaded the muscles in his shoulders.
“Maggie, love,” he whispered, stripping her nightgown over her head. “Do you really think Paul Brennan’s the right doctor, considering the problems you’ve had?”
She scrutinized his face and a smile curled her mouth. “Jake, you’re not by any chance jealous?”
“Maybe.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. It suggests you don’t have any concept of how much I love you.”
He kissed a trail down her neck, murmuring, “Are you so in love with me you’ll marry me before the kids leave for school—like maybe while your mom is here?”
Her back arched as she writhed naked beneath him, moaning, “Uh-huh.”
He nibbled his way down her stomach to her navel and traced it with his tongue. “Are you in love with me enough, if you have another miscarriage, you’ll see a specialist and do whatever it takes to have a baby with me?”
She grabbed his head and gasped. “Uh-huh.”
Sliding lower, he lifted her hips. “Do you love me enough to go to a different doctor?” He dipped his tongue into her dewy heat several times before adding, “Say, a nice balding sixty-year-old specialist with a paunch?”
When he resumed his intimate teasing, a series of moans escaped her. Her head thrashed on the pillow while her fingers curled in a death grip, clutching his hair. After only a few flicks of his tongue, she cried out her pleasure.
He moved back up her trembling body and gazed down at the thick lashes fanned on her rosy cheeks. His chest constricted with the intensity of the feelings she aroused in him. “You haven’t answered my last question about the stodgy doctor with the receding hairline.”
Her eyelids fluttered open, and she chuckled softly. “Unh-uh. Not a chance, Bucko.”
“Hmmm....” He twisted his mouth and raised his eyebrows. “Do you at least love me enough to treat me to an instant replay of the night I got you pregnant?”
She slid her hand down his stomach, smiling as she caressed the length of him. “Exactly which moment did you have in mind to replay?”
“I think you’re well aware of what I’m referring to. You’re doing just fine. But remember instant replays are always best in slow motion.”
As she gradually nibbled her way down his abdomen, then took her time running her tongue over his erection, he groaned, “Oh, Rosebud,”—his eyes rolled back in his head—“do you have any idea how much I love you?” And always have.
She gently closed her lips over him for a few seconds, then drew back and whispered, “Enough to give up coaching football?”
He bolted upright and stared at her. “You wouldn’t really ask me to do that, would you? I mean, I will if that’s what it’ll take to make you hap—”
“Relax.” She chuckled, pushing him back on the bed. “I was just testing you. I wanted to be sure I had your complete attention and devotion.”
“Well, you do.” He pulled her down on top of him. “Do I pass, Teacher?”
“You don’t just pass.” She kissed him softly. “You get an A plus-plus.”
Epilogue
December, three and a half years later....
The president of the Downtown Athletic Club of New York held out his hand toward Jake. “Here to accept the Heisman Trophy on his son’s behalf is Dr. Jacob Manion, better known by all of you as Rocket Manion.”
Amidst thunderous applause, Jake stood and set the huge bronze statue on the table before
stepping up to the podium and leaning into the microphone. “Thank you, everyone. Please allow me to apologize for Alex’s absence this evening. My son was concerned that—”
Confused by the audience’s snickering, Jake glanced around at the sea of amused faces and remembered the sportscasters never referred to his son as Alex. He’d been Ajax to the media ever since his freshman year when his teammates nicknamed him after the Trojan warrior reputed to be the second fastest man and best spear thrower in Greek mythology.
“I’m sorry.” Jake spread his hands and smiled. “I forgot he’s Ajax to most of you. When I left to come here tonight, my son was pacing at the hospital, worrying you’d think he isn’t honored to receive this prestigious award.”
Jake smiled at the president of the Athletic Club. “Let me assure you, he is. Unfortunately, the newest member of the Manion dynasty insisted on being born a half hour ago. I know you’ll agree it was a bit more important for my son to be there to welcome his second child, Daniel Jacob, into the world.”
He waited for the crowd’s whistling and applause to subside. “On my son’s behalf, I’d like to thank all the sportscasters and the Athletic Club for bestowing this honor on him. And I hope you’ll forgive me if I don’t hang around for dessert. I have a new grandson to meet.”
As he stepped down from the dais to several congratulatory handshakes, a journalist shoved a microphone at Jake. “Rocket, how does it feel to hear people say your son is an even better quarterback than you were?”
He smiled as a dozen cameras flashed in his face. “It feels spectacular. How could I not be proud? I trained him.”
~~~
Jake leaned against the doorjamb outside the pink and white bedroom and listened to Maggie argue with their daughter who would be turning three in a few months. “Katie, pleeease go to sleep like Elisabeth and Olivia.”
Elisabeth, or Little-Bit, as Alex affectionately dubbed his daughter, had been named after Jake’s late mother. She and her Aunt Olivia looked like two little cherubs cuddled together.
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