“Sure,” he choked out nervously. He began to slowly move his hands onto my shoulders and his thumbs kneaded into my tense shoulder muscles. I felt the slightest quiver in his hands. Poor thing. He probably hadn’t touched a woman in months, maybe longer. His nerves were getting the best of him. For a second, it was just a measly second, but still. I actually felt bad for the kid. He’d opened Pandora’s Box and now he would get what he asked for. Well, perhaps not exactly what he had asked for.
Olivia began to mirror my behavior and whispered to Trent that she too, would enjoy a massage. Trent’s eyes practically bulged out of their sockets as she sat directly in front of him waiting for him to begin. He hesitated and looked over at Riley and me as I pretended to enjoy his soft caresses on my back. His courage seemed to have grown instantaneously. He didn’t hesitate like Riley and his hands began to wander around over Olivia with much more liberty than Riley was taking on me. For that, I was never more thankful to be in my position rather than Olivia’s.
I slowly lowered my head back to rest between his face and his right shoulder as he continued to massage my arms dutifully. I pretended to close my eyes in a moment of pleasure. His head lowered into mine and he moved his wet hands over my breasts and that’s when I knew he was ready. I allowed him another gentle squeeze and then politely disengaged myself from his trembling fingers and hands. I moved slowly through the water over to Olivia and pulled her gently from Trent’s grasp.
The look on poor Trent’s face made me want to laugh hysterically but I willed myself to ignore his pout. He looked like a child whose favorite toy had just been rudely torn from his defenseless fingers. Oh well. He wouldn’t be getting any sympathy from me.
I led Olivia over to the edge of the hot tub. I closed my eyes and gently leaned in to kiss her lips knowing the boys would now be watching our every move in lustful despair. I swiveled my tongue over her pink lips and locked her into a full embrace. To my surprise, Olivia kissed me back. She was a much better actress than I had anticipated.
I gently pulled out of her kiss, lowered myself into the water and sat. I threw a flirtatious glance their way. They looked back as if they’d just arrived at the gates of Heaven. They didn’t move nor did they speak a word out of fear of ruining the acts as they unfolded before their eyes.
“Do you like to watch?” I asked them playfully.
“Yes,” they replied in unison. Words had eluded them and they could no longer engage in conversation.
“I like playing with Olivia. I’m gunna play with her a little bit and I want you boys to play with each other too, just to get things started.”
Without waiting for a reply, I took Olivia’s hand in mind and led her to sit on my lap. Her face inched closer to mine. Her hands held my face in place as she leaned in to kiss me again. Her fingers twirled into my hair and she grasped my head with more force than before. I took it as a sign that she was enjoying herself and was coming along for the ride.
Our wet tongues wrestled softly until she pulled away and began lightly flicking my nipple with her tongue. She continued to lick and fondle my breasts and I couldn’t believe I was actually enjoying Olivia’s playfulness. I felt my body heat begin to rise in reciprocation. It was definitely getting hotter in here.
“What are you waiting for?” I asked the boys who couldn’t tear their eyes from Olivia. She suckled on me hungrily and the boys stood motionless with their tiny hard pricks pitching a tent. I hadn’t noticed but somehow they had already removed their trunks waiting for their turns.
“I’m still having a good time playing with Olivia here. Trent, I want you to give him a hand job until we tell you we’re ready for you guys,” I demanded. My voice had hardened and though they both appeared shocked and repulsed, they followed my instructions.
Trent got on his knees and started to jerk Riley’s dick but apparently Riley was no longer enjoying himself. Riley looked down as Trent continued to move his hand back and forth fluidly while watching Olivia continue to caress and suck on my neck.
Riley’s disappointment was evident only as his penis retreated and deflated in Trent’s masculine hands. Trent looked up at Riley inquisitively. “What, man? I don’t like this shit,” Riley said exasperated.
“Just give me a blow job or something,” he demanded.
“What?” asked Trent. “Fuck you, no way. You wouldn’t suck my dick. I’m not sticking that shit in my mouth.”
“Yeah, I would,” defended Riley. Their bickering was turning me off.
“Just do it!” I commanded
As if the words had been sent from God himself, Trent got down on his knees, grabbed Riley’s soft cock and started bobbing back and forth. He knew how to take one for the team. I liked that he obeyed so dutifully. My arousal sped up. Trent’s dick hardened and I could see by the look on his face that he shamefully liked it. Riley’s face turned bright red and he threw his head back in delight. His mouth hung open and his tongue swung out. I guess it didn’t make a difference who was sucking you off as long as someone was doing it. A mouth was a mouth.
Olivia took advantage of my distraction while I watched the boys and tugged at the string that held the bottom of my bikini together. The loose black bow came undone underwater and she pulled me out of the water to sit on the ledge of the tub. She had a look in her eyes that I’d never seen before and I sensed a shift in the dynamic.
Suddenly, I wasn’t so sure about this whole scenario anymore. Granted, my evil little plan had worked and it didn’t look like we would have to have sex with these douche bags but still Olivia appeared to have taken matters into her own hands.
Her entire body moved along with mine until she came back and forced her face in mine.
We kissed with such intensity that I didn’t know what to think. I had not prepared for something so intense. The violent images began to take flight in my head and I too, was enthralled in the pleasure I was experiencing that I couldn’t stop Olivia when she inserted her two fingers in me and began to tongue my pussy like a hungry slave. She licked and sucked forcefully as if trying to draw out my soul through my vagina.
My body drew into her as her face pushed back into me. Olivia withdrew her drenched fingers from within me and shoved them into her mouth. She licked them clean and reinserted them into my anus. Her fingers moved in and out of my ass as I watched Riley face fucking the shit out of Trent. His thrusts became more aggressive and impatient. He moaned out in agony as he held out his dick and came into Trent’s mouth.
Could I have been dreaming it all up? I felt as if the happenings all around me could have been a passing thought. Certainly, this was much too wild to be real. I looked down on Olivia as she continued to suck on my vaginal lips. Yup, it was real. No, it couldn’t have been a dream because I never in a million years would have imagined Olivia to be going down on me while two straight men performed homosexual acts on each other. This wasn’t a fantasy. We’d stumbled clumsily on a monster waiting to turn its ugly head.
Trent couldn’t wait patiently enough for his turn. He tugged at Riley’s neck signaling his time to shine and Riley jerked away. “I’m going, I’m going. Don’t pull on me,” he said. He went down quickly and began returning the favor to his friend. And that’s when I finally came as Olivia forced her tongue into my pussy. Then it all went blank.
Chapter 25
I struggled to compartmentalize what had happened with Olivia. In an effort to avoid the raging impulse to kill my best friend I tried to think of something better to do with my time. It would definitely keep my mind off her and onto something better. Bill. At the very least it would delay her death by a few days.
I’d had a Y.O.L.O. movement as the kids called it these days, when I called Bill and told him I’d like to see him. I had to see him really. But I didn’t tell him that. That was a few hours ago and here I was, sitting alone in a coffee shop waiting for him.
Agreeing to meet had been simple enough. In truth, there was nowhere in the world I wouldn’t h
ave agreed to meet. He hadn’t sounded surprised when I phoned, which was unsettling. As if he knew it would only be a matter of time till I called and required his assistance. It maddened me that he was so sure of himself but my poker face would not falter.
I’d always been just as sure of myself as Bill was. What a thrill to experience the other side. We also hadn’t the need to exchange pleasantries over the phone, which I much appreciated.
The conversation was over just as quickly as it had begun. Hello?...Hi…I’d like to see you… Meet me at Tiny Sips Coffee Shop in Warwick at 2:00…K Bye. That had been the extent of our conversation. And here I was taking teeny tiny sips of an espresso, waiting for the elusive Bill to arrive. He wasn’t late. I was early.
I wanted to get an idea of the area before I could meet him comfortably. The paranoid serial killer in me tended to heed precaution. You just never knew. One could never be too careful, serial killer or not.
Two young women who appeared to be University students sat furiously typing away into their laptops when Bill arrived. They never looked up. If they had, they would have never been able to continue working so diligently. That was Bill. He didn’t just walk through a door and enter. He arrived… And with grace.
My mouth began to salivate. An image of his exquisite neck dripping with blood flashed before me. Shunning the thought I said, “Hi,” as he walked towards my table. He walked with both his hands in his pockets. It displayed a child -like sense in him I found to be endearing. In a simpler man it might have come off as insecure.
He withdrew his right hand from his pocket and extended a firm handshake with a devilish grin. I was sure it wasn’t as evil as it looked. Just as I was much more evil than I looked. Never judge a book by its cover, my mother used to say. Nothing was ever as it seemed. Her advice had rung true numerous times throughout my life. I hoped it would be just as true now.
He ordered a coffee and sat down. “To what do I owe this unexpected encounter Jolene?” Jesus Christ. I could eat up every word as he let it escape from his mouth. The perfection that was his existence should be punishable by death and I should be his executioner. But for now I’d settle for the enjoyable company he provided.
“You mentioned the last time we met…” I paused momentarily. My throat clenched and my tongue went dry. I took a sip of coffee and glanced around the shop. The few people that were there went about their business to my satisfaction.
“You said you were a psychiatrist. I think I met the man I needed exactly when I needed him.” He made no immediate response. None of that quick straight to business talk that I anticipated. Instead, just like a legitimate shrink, he dutifully listened to the things I was saying. He listened for every vocal inflection and every subtle clue as to what I was truly attempting to convey. He listened so well that I began to feel uncomfortable. After all, this probably wasn’t the best place to discuss the things that I wanted to discuss.
“Do you, uh, have an office where we can discuss things in more intimate detail?” I asked unsure of how to proceed.
“Yes. I work from home. I have an office there. Would you care to have an initial session and see how things go?”
“You work from home?” I inquired. I thought it strange. A psychiatrist working from home nowadays sounded queer to my ears.
“Yes,” he said.
“You promise you’re not a psycho and that I won’t end up in 20 pieces inside of a trash bag or anything?”
He laughed. Oh the irony.
He brought his right hand over his heart and said, “I promise.”
It was good enough. He had answered my questions to my satisfaction and I took it on a leap of faith that I wouldn’t kill him. I didn’t make any promises though. I feared entering his house again. I could never be sure how composed I might remain alone with a man I wanted to murder. And I really really needed a kill.
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Nothing in Bill’s home had changed since I’d been here last. We entered the house through the back kitchen door instead of the front, which gave me a better understanding of the landscape of his home. I wanted to see it all but I feared knowing too much. Too much information would turn my gears and I’d talk myself into killing him. As if I needed encouragement.
The woman in the portrait near the kitchen table still stood in all her glory. If he meant to arouse lust in those who happened to pass through his kitchen he was doing a fine job.
His office was really a living room that he had furnished to appear like an open-invitation office. It shared a wall with the kitchen and yet another wall with a sitting room. Only a split glass door that remained open separated the kitchen from the office. In the far left corner, a large wooden desk sat at an angle. It was the type of desk someone really important like Warren Buffet or Donald Trump might use. It was gorgeous.
A metal tag sat on the front ledge of the desk and read Dr. William Alexandros. I’d initially known him only as Bill but his full name was so much sexier. I found myself silently repeating it over and over so as not to forget. But who could forget a name like that.
Directly across the room, in the other corner was a long black sitting couch. It was quite a distance from the desk and I assumed that was where I was meant to sit. I took the liberty and took a seat on the black couch. I was eager to start before nerves got the best of me.
Bill said nothing but cleared his throat. He rummaged for something at his desk and I watched him closely. I wasn’t studying him. I was merely enjoying the view. I could have watched him for hours. But that would have been more than a little creepy.
He pulled out a pair of thin black -rimmed glasses and set them before his eyes. I almost had a stroke. Oh Bill, why did you have to put on those damn glasses? As if he needed anything else to make him any more enticing. I caught my breath and struggled to regain control of the impulse to ravage him to pieces. The impulses were strong but I was stronger. My muscles tensed but I didn’t move.
He started writing things down. I thought it was weird since I hadn’t yet said anything but I let him continue without interruption.
Finally, he set down the stack of paper work and shot me a serious look.
“Jolene, you are aware that I am a psychiatrist and that by sitting here in my office you are subject to a doctor-patient confidentiality agreement?” he sounded so professional.
“Yes, of course,” I said. “But I have certain reservations.”
“Such as?”
“I’m not really sure how to explain but… Uh…” my voice trailed off. I planned on telling him a great deal more than I had ever told anyone else. But before I could do so I needed to know that anything I revealed would be in strict confidence. But how could I relay the severity of the situation without sending him running as far away as possible?
But I felt the fear and realized I had to let it go. For once in my life I would need to trust an individual more than I could even trust myself. How else would I ever overcome my issues? I had always and I mean always, wished I could purge the urge to kill men. I’d also committed enough murders in my lifetime that I have surpassed any hope for atonement. But, at the very least, I could hope to stop one day.
I guess that was the main reason I couldn’t bring myself to join Derek and his kill club or whatever it was they called themselves. I didn’t want to submerge myself into a culture of killing and more killing. I didn’t want to evolve as a killer. I wanted to be able to grow out of the person I had become. I wanted to get better.
I decided right then and there that I truly wanted to stop killing. And I knew that I wouldn’t be able to stop today or tomorrow but maybe one day I could. The odds were against me of course. I’ve never been stupid. I knew that serial killers don’t just stop killing. But I honestly believed in my never-before existing heart that if I wanted something bad enough I could have it. After all, I have had everything I’d wanted up until this very moment. Why couldn’t I have this too? It was encouragement enough to at least try.
�
�The things I wish to discuss under your supervision are very sexual in nature and also very dangerous. I need the doctor patient confidentiality agreement to go further than its usual limits. I can only confide in this relationship as long as every word of every discussion remains between us and only us even as you might fear I could hurt myself, or others. Do you think you would be ok with something like that?”
“Those are rather rigid guidelines. They are certainly ethically questionable,” he paused contemplating my offer. “But yes, I do believe I can agree to that.”
But I knew that he couldn’t understand anything until I painted a fuller picture and I could not do so without him first agreeing to total secrecy. It was a must even though I had no idea how much I was truly prepared to divulge. How much was too much? I couldn’t be sure until I hit the boundary. Was I willing to go there? Was he?
“You can say no. If any of what I say makes you uncomfortable, you can say that you don’t wish to treat me and I wouldn’t be offended,” I volunteered.
“Do I look uncomfortable Jolene?” He had stopped writing, placed the pen down on the legal pad and clasped his hands in front of his face. He rested his chin on his two outstretched thumbs and peered at me through his glasses.
He looked even more handsome than before. He had a habit of doing that. Perhaps it was because men always looked more powerful sitting behind enormous desks but Bill appeared to be a God.
“No, you don’t look uncomfortable” I said to answer his question. You look fucking divine was what I wanted to say but it was too forward even for me.
“I’m very comfortable and I want you to be as well,” he said. “I will do my very best to help you overcome the troubles that plague you, if you’ll allow me. But first, I have only one rule and it is non-negotiable,” he paused and looked at me with a dead serious expression. It made me uncomfortable when he looked at me like that. “You must always tell the truth. Should I ever uncover a lie, our doctor/patient relationship ceases to exist and you’ll have to seek treatment elsewhere. Are we clear?”
All of Her Men Page 16