by Lark, Jane
Her gaze spun to me, “Really?”
“Yeah, I enjoyed it.”
She laughed, her arms coming up about my neck at the same time.
Her hug was firm, short and sharp, but the knowledge of it twisted something very male in my gut.
“Hey!” The sound guy held out my beer.
I turned and grabbed it, glad of the distraction.
“We’ll pick another song then.” Rach reached for the lists
Chapter Seven
We were laughing uncontrollably over nothing, and I gripped Jason’s arm to stop myself stumbling as we stepped up the curb and joined the nightclub queue.
He’d been down after Lindy’s call but the karaoke had cheered him up. He’d been terrified of doing it, I’d seen that, but he’d done it, and loved it, and we’d ended up singing three songs together. He wouldn’t brave it alone.
The third song we’d laughed as much as we’d sung. I’d picked Coldplay’s, Viva La Vida, and the crowd had loved it. They all sang along as we belted it out.
I kept a hold of his arm. I was feeling a little worse off for drinking, but I didn’t give a damn, we were having fun. I was having fun. I was seriously high. My head had been fizzing all night, crowded with thoughts while my nerves hummed with energy. I wanted to dance. I loved dancing. Normally on a night like this, if I’d been with Declan, we’d have taken cocaine. But I didn’t need drugs. I was high on life with Jason.
I nearly stumbled on a crack in the sidewalk. His other arm came across and caught me up.
“Sorry, probably shouldn’t have worn such high heels when I planned on drinking.”
He smiled.
The line shifted forward. We were way back.
“The air will probably help sober us up,” he said.
“I’ve got a plan to do that in the club.” Both my hands surrounded his arm, gripping the sleeve of his leather jacket.
“What?”
“Jägerbombs.”
“Jägerbombs?”
“Yeah, Red Bull and Jägermeister, it’s a great drink for pepping you up on a night out.”
“Or giving you a headache on a grand scale, one or the other…”
I laughed. “Just try one. You promised you’d be up for anything…”
“Okay, I’m up for it. I’m not looking like the coward again.”
I grinned, my mind yelling at me just how awesome this all was. I was so buzzing––up for anything.
He wasn’t complaining about me clinging onto his arm, but then he never complained about anything I’d done, he was always so accepting. My nice guy. Not yours Rachel. Not yours. I should let go of his arm, but I needed it to stay upright; and besides, sisters held their brothers’ arms didn’t they?
We were near the door now.
I lifted onto my toes to see who the doormen were, lost balance and nearly fell. Jason caught me again. I knew them; they’d let us in even if it was full.
“I’ve seen you before haven’t I?” one of the guys said when we got up to them.
I nodded and in the corner of my vision caught Jason turning to look at me.
“You used to come a lot. You haven’t been for ages…” I used to come before I’d got into the club Declan favored.
“No, I know. But I’m back now.”
“Good to see you. Go on in. Have a good night.”
I’d let go of Jason’s arm when we reached the doormen and now his arm came about me and his hand rested on my waist, as it had done a couple of times tonight.
I loved the feeling. It felt reassuring, like I belonged there. None of the other men I’d been with had ever touched me so considerately; everything had always been about sex and possession. Jason and I were friends, friends who touched, and I reveled in the knowledge.
We climbed the stairs to the club a little unsteadily, swaying and laughing at each other’s drunkenness. While the beat of dance music drummed through the doors and wall above.
At the top of the stairs we paid our money and then checked our coats and my purse, I gave Jason my money to put in his pocket, and then entered heaven. Well it was heaven to me. Lights flashed and spun and images travelled over the walls and ceiling, while other lights fell like rain drops down one wall. My heart pounded to the rhythm of the music, and I felt the energy brewing inside me while my brain ranted on to me about how great me, Jason and our night out together was. I wanted to dance to let it all out.
But Jägerbombs first.
“Come on!” I pulled his hand off my waist and held onto it, leading him toward the bar. “Jägerbombs!”
“You are seriously mad, you know!”
“I know!”
“I can’t even hear myself think in here!”
“Then shout louder!” I yelled.
“Right!”
“And party harder!” I shouted with a smile.
“Yeah, right!” He was laughing. But then his expression sobered. “Who did you used to come here with?”
I lifted my eyebrows at his fishing, but then answered honestly. I was in too good a mood now to care what he knew. “No one. On my own.”
When we reached the bar he leaned over and caught the attention of a woman who was serving. He smiled at her. She smiled just as openly back, clearly liking what she saw. Well, he was young and good-looking, of course she liked what she saw. Women had been eyeing him up all night. But he was with me. I glowed with pride.
Sister… Sister… Sister…
“Jägerbombs, two of them!” he yelled at the woman, when she came over to take our order.
“Coming right up!”
I smiled widely at him when he glanced back at me. He smiled too.
The woman poured two Red Bulls into glasses, and then the two shots of Jägermeister.
Jason paid then turned to me. “Right, what’s the trick for drinking these then?”
I grinned, picked up my shot, then dropped it in the Red Bull glass. “Like this.” It started fizzing, and I picked it up and drank it quickly, with the bubbles tickling my throat and liquid dripping from my chin.
He copied, dropping his shot glass into the Red Bull and then he started to drink as I slammed my glass-in-a-glass down on the bar.
“What a buzz.” He slammed his glass-in-a-glass down too. I wiped my chin on my sleeve, watching him watching me.
“Now, we’re gonna dance ourselves sober.” I gripped his hand and started pulling him toward the dance floor.
“Rach, I hate to tell you this, I don’t dance…”
“You do now. Come on, you’re gonna shake that ass.”
“Rach, I’ve never shaken my ass in my entire life…”
“Well now’s the time to start then, you’d never done tequila slammers, or karaoke, or Jägerbombs. You have now. You’re gonna dance, Jason Macinlay. You’re not gonna spoil my night.”
“Okay, okay, I’m moving aren’t I…” His resistance died as he smiled and trailed behind me, his hand gripping mine in return.
Oh, I was having such a good night, a night like I hadn’t had in a long time. I’d been going stir-crazy with Declan, trapped in his penthouse apartment like a bird in a cage. It was no wonder I’d blown, no wonder at all.
I glanced back at Jason as we reached the edge of the dance floor. I was having the best night of my life. He was so fucking gorgeous.
“Go into the middle somewhere. Then I can hide among the crowd and no one will know how bad I am!”
I laughed.
When I got him in the middle, I put my arms around his neck, to put him more at ease. He put his hands on my hips. But then, when he started to dance, he wasn’t bad at all.
I leaned to his ear. “You put yourself down too much, Jason! You can dance! You’ve got rhythm, that’s all you need!”
“Well, Lindy always complained, but then we don’t dance like this!”
“Well Lindy shouldn’t complain!”
He glanced down watching how my hips were rocking close to his and then adjusted h
is moves to coordinate more closely to mine, gyrating his hips perfectly.
I felt incredibly hot suddenly, and I could quite happily have stripped off my dress. I didn’t, but when he looked up again, our gazes met, and his eyes were really dark and deep, and shining. There was hardly any space between us and only a little air. It was thin, and my lungs empty.
He really was perfect.
Sister… Sister… Sister…
It was hard to think like his sister though, when the edge of his pelvic bone was rocking to the beat of the music against my hip, and I could feel his muscular thigh between my legs.
I kept a hold of his gaze and cupped his nape with my hand, my fingers brushing over the close cut hair at the back of his head. I could feel the shape of his skull.
His hand slid up my back a little and I was lost. “I…” I wanted to kiss him so much, to tell him how I felt about him. That I was obsessed with him… But then the music slipped into a new beat and it brought me back to earth and reality.
I turned around so my back faced him and matched my rhythm to the shift in the music. He picked it up. He really wasn’t a bad dancer at all. I couldn’t imagine how he’d been dancing with Lindy to be told he was bad at it. He was good; really good.
His hand came about my waist, and splayed over my stomach, and his thighs brushed up against the back of mine as his groin rocked against my buttocks and the music and the crowd whirled about us as the caffeine kicked in and made my heart race.
Or maybe it was the beautiful, sexy guy behind me, who made my heart race.
I was having so much fun.
We carried on, dancing, and gyrating, and messing around, and as each new song emerged from the sound system we changed rhythms and styles; sometimes mimicking the others as we’d been doing from the beginning, and sometimes just doing our own thing. Mostly the “our own thing” moves came from Jason, as he chose to occasionally break us apart and link hands and spin and turn me.
I wondered if that was how he danced with Lindy, I didn’t want to ask, I didn’t want to spoil the closeness which was gathering about us.
He was having a good time too, I could see it. His eyes were glowing with pleasure, and his movements were relaxed. Occasionally he’d laugh when we misjudged a move and collided or got twisted.
But for about an hour and a half we never let go of each other.
A new song played, and he immediately grabbed me, with an arm about the waist, and drew me back close against him, my bottom striking his groin. As the R&B rhythm rocked the whole dance floor, he pressed close, and heat and hunger consumed me as he rocked up against my ass.
Then his hands ran slowly from just below my waist down over my hips and gripped the tops of my thighs.
I was going to die from hunger.
I rested my head back on his shoulder and whispered in a husky, dry voice, by his ear. “You dance brilliantly.”
“It’s easy when I’m dancing with such a hot woman. Every guy on this floor is jealous,” he whispered back, his lips brushing my ear. “You look and feel amazing, Rach.”
My temperature flew through the roof. That hadn’t been a casual compliment.
What about Lindy?
God, I couldn’t think about Lindy. The guy was right up behind me, his hips rocking against mine. How could I think of him with another woman when together we could be this.
I turned around to face him; consequence and moderation slipping from my overzealous mind.
I remembered him saying he was a fast learner. He was. He’d been watching what others were doing too, not just learning from me.
His arm came around my waist and drew me tighter against him as his thigh pressed firmly between my legs, and then he leaned me back a little and cupped my scalp.
My heart pounded. Our lips were so close and his hips were rocking again.
I was forgetting how to dance.
“You’re pretty hot yourself, Jason.”
“Am I?” It wasn’t really a question, or trying to be coy, I read it as a challenge.
“Yes, and you know it … ” My voice dropped to a really quiet whisper, as the air seemed to all slip out of my lungs. “…and I’ve seen you naked remember, I know how good your ass is.”
He leaned even closer, and his eyes bored deep into mine. “And let’s remember, I’ve seen you naked, too, Rach.”
My heart was pounding and everything between us seemed to have shifted in a few moments. “Jason … ”
I don’t know who moved to kiss the other first. It seemed a mutual thing. It just happened. It seemed the right thing. Tomorrow was for regrets. Tonight was for being together.
Like his hands on me, his lips were gentle, not urgent and demanding, like every other guy I’d been with. Something twisted in my stomach, something warm and beautiful. It felt so good to kiss him at last.
His mouth opened. I opened mine. Then his tongue breached my lips.
It was heaven kissing him. My tongue danced with his, then delved into his mouth as his tongue retreated. I’d never thought I would actually kiss him.
One hand braced his nape. It was the hand he’d tended. My other gripped his upper arm. I was terrified of falling, when there was no way I could fall in reality, but I felt as though I was falling into him. One of his strong masculine hands cradled my scalp in return, while the other travelled up and down my back.
He wasn’t even trying to grope me, not at all, just kissing me. I wanted so much more.
We were still dancing, slowly rocking against each other, back and forth, to the rhythm of the music.
Lindy? I couldn’t think about her. I couldn’t stop. I was too caught up in this. My craving was beyond decision. I’d stepped across a line, and I was incapable of stepping back. I’d never been good at not going too far.
I shut Lindy out of my mind. If he wasn’t thinking of her, I didn’t want to.
I was messed up. Sick. That’s what I was. I’d learned to accept this, it was the rest of the world that couldn’t. But Jason didn’t seem to care.
The music changed to a faster beat and he broke the kiss. Our gazes met again, and I could see the questions in his eyes; neither of us really knew what we’d just done. But we’d done it now, there was no going back. I didn’t want to go back. I wanted to go forward.
“Let’s get a drink!” he said.
We were both hot and sweaty. I just wanted to be without clothes.
“A Jägerbomb?” I queried when we reached the bar.
“No, I’ve had enough alcohol. I just want a soda!”
“Lightweight…”
“Maybe I am, but I’m just really thirsty!”
So am I, for you…
The same woman who’d served us earlier came over. Jason leaned over the bar again, shouting across it so she could hear. “Just a soda and…” He looked at me.
I could keep drinking. I would usually keep drinking. But… things were different tonight. I felt different. I didn’t want to drink anymore. I felt almost sober in a crazy way. “I’ll stick with you and have a soda too!”
He smiled and then looked at the woman. “Two sodas then!”
Her eyebrows lifted and then she turned to pour them.
He took out his wallet.
I put my hand over his instantly. “It’s my round… Dutch remember!”
“Two sodas won’t kill me! We can call it quits now!”
Right after I’d kissed him? It was changing things already. But I didn’t care––just so long as he kissed me again.
He handed me my drink. “Let’s find a booth and sit for a bit!”
“Okay!”
It was strange, I’d never let anyone lead quite like this before. Demand, order, boss me about when they hadn’t got their way and it had got as far as an argument, yes. Lead, with me following? No.
Most people were dancing now and so we found an empty semi-circle of cushioned seating and slid in around the central table.
He gripped my hand and thr
eaded his fingers through mine as he drank his soda, watching me.
I saw his Adam’s apple moving. I even found that sexy. I just wanted to be all over him.
I sipped my soda and took a breath.
He didn’t say anything. It was like he didn’t want to think of reality either.
I stared at him, as he looked at me.
I couldn’t breathe easily, my pulse was too quick as my heart raced, waiting to know what would happen next. He was nice. I didn’t want to scare him away.
He put his empty glass down on the table, and then his fingers touched my shoulder, before lifting to rub my hair.
I sipped the soda again.
He watched me.
I sighed as his thumb brushed my jaw, and then sipped my soda again.
“Rach?”
“Yeah?”
“Either hurry up and finish that soda or put the thing down.”
I put it down and immediately his hand moved to the back of my neck and brought my mouth against his.
He was as hungry for me as I was for him, I could feel it. It was going to happen tonight, I knew. I was going let it happen, and he was going to let it happen.
Rach kissed as she did everything else, full on, and there was no theatre to it, it was just what it was.
I’d never kissed anyone but Lindy before.
Rach would laugh her head off if she knew that.
But I didn’t want to think of Lindy. Lindy and I were over. We should have been over long ago. I put her out of my mind completely. I was thinking about Rachel Shears tonight, slightly battered by her secret history, and full of hidden insecurity, and full of life. Rachel Shears.
She was leaning into me as I kissed her, and she kissed me like she was trying to get inside me. I wanted to be inside her, but that would be too far, too soon. It had taken Lindy and I four years to get that far. Forget Lindy. ‘You’re too nice, Jason Macinlay.’ I heard Rach’s voice in my head, at the thought. Then I forgot thought and just enjoyed.
She tasted of the soda, and she smelt of her. I’d grown used to her scent after sharing a bed with her for over a week and half. Her body felt good beneath the thin jersey dress.