A Father's Secret

by Yvonne Lindsay

  She hadn’t even been home the night the little girl had been injured and died. After a night of drinking heavily, she’d passed out in an alley and woken in the morning only when a street sweeper had come by. When she got back to the house, the police were there. She’d arrived just in time to be taken into the station for questioning.

  The press had been there, the air filled with shouts and the flash and click of cameras. She’d been confused and disoriented—and scared. Very, very scared.

  She hadn’t willingly conspired with the others in the house, but she had been threatened, and threatened very convincingly, with what might happen if she told the police what she thought had happened. It was no excuse, sure, for not telling the truth, but as she’d told herself at the time, who would have believed her anyway? She was just another runaway. Someone living off the streets, surviving on cunning and luck to get food in her belly each day. Still, the guilt over her silence had haunted her, wrecking the tiny bit of peace of mind she’d found since leaving her mother’s house.

  It had become her turning point. The line in the sand where she knew she had one chance, and one chance only to make her life right again, to get onto a solid path for a worthy existence. She’d headed for Lake Tahoe, knowing she needed to get away. At the hostel where she’d stayed, she’d found the advertisement for work at Connell Lodge…and the rest was history.

  Or rather, the rest had been history. Now, if Sam was to be believed, it would all be exposed again. She knew that if any of what had happened at that time was dragged before a Family Court it couldn’t help but color how they might deal with her. Especially in light of whom she was up against. Sam’s corporate image was world-renowned. The man himself was charismatic, warm and attentive. She’d struck a low blow when she’d dragged his responsibility for his wife’s death into the argument. He’d clearly been punishing himself all this time, but any court would see that he was a good man who’d make a wonderful father. His lawyers would see to that.

  And all that aside, even if she could fight Sam, even if he had to provide court-ordered maintenance toward Riley’s care, she couldn’t afford a legal battle. She didn’t have two pennies to rub together herself. Everything she and James had built up here at Connell Lodge had been invested back into it. Into the estate that was supposed to form a part of Riley’s heritage. A heritage that would now, in accordance with the original James Connell’s wishes, be gifted to the State of California.

  She had nothing. Nothing and nowhere to go. No job, no prospects. No future.

  When the lodge was taken away from her, it would be the tipping point that would see Riley into Sam’s care, she just knew it. Every instinct in her screamed at her to run. To pack the car full of every basic item she and Riley could need, to grab him from his crib and to drive until she could find somewhere that Sam Thornton couldn’t find her. But in her heart she knew she couldn’t do that. It wouldn’t be fair to Riley.

  So where did that leave her?

  If Sam truly was Riley’s father then, yes, he did have rights to his son. But until she had categorical proof of those rights and a court order to hand him over, she would not let her baby out of her sight. And, until that moment, Sam Thornton could take a hike.

  Wearily she tipped the casserole into the trash. She had no appetite. Once she’d cleaned up the minimal disorder of her kitchen she went through to her room, showered and dressed in her nightgown, only to stare at the dark ceiling all night as sleep eluded her and the terrifying prospect of losing her child filled her mind.

  She was still groggy from lack of sleep the next morning. Thankfully, she’d drifted off somewhere around three in the morning, but Riley was an early riser and today was no exception. Her relief was palpable when she went in to get him from his crib. His temperature was back to normal and he was back to his happy gummy-smiling self.

  Erin lost herself in the routine of morning, trying desperately not to think about what was going to happen next. By the time she made her way through to the kitchen with Riley she was almost starting to feel normal, despite the hunk of anxiety that sat somewhere between her chest and her stomach. She hadn’t been in the kitchen long when she heard Sam enter the room.

  “My car will be here shortly,” he said bluntly.

  She turned slowly, forcing herself to meet his gaze, but she needn’t have worried. Sam’s attention was one hundred percent on the little boy in the tabletop rocker. Riley crowed and kicked his feet as he saw Sam.

  “Good morning, my boy,” Sam said, a note of something in his voice Erin couldn’t quite put her finger on.

  Hunger? Longing? Maybe even love? In an instant she saw the resemblance between the two of them. The square shape of Riley’s jaw, the slight indentation that would no doubt, with time, become like the dimple on Sam’s chin, as well. Her heart squeezed painfully tight. Now that she knew, she saw other resemblances, too. How could she not have noticed them before? How could she not have questioned Sam’s arrival, her first guest inquiry in months, hard on the heels of the letter from the clinic’s representatives and the lawyers acting for Party A—Sam? She still found it hard to get her head around the fact that they were one and the same. That he’d deceived her from the very start. The knowledge sent a buzz of anger vibrating through her.

  “Feel free to wait outside,” she said as curtly as possible and turned back to the baby cereal she’d started Riley on the past few mornings.

  “Yeah, I bet you’d like that. But it’s not about what you want anymore, Erin. It never was. It’s about my son and me.”

  Erin felt his words as if each one was a physical blow. A solid and hurtful reminder that she wasn’t good enough. She’d never been good enough. It was why she’d worked so damn hard to carve out a life for herself here. Away from the father who’d abandoned her as an infant, away from the mother who had taken every opportunity to tell Erin how her very existence had blighted her mother’s life. Away from every other person who had let her down, told her she was a failure, that she was no good.

  But she’d proven she was better than they’d all said. She’d pulled herself from the brink of what was surely about to become a desperate spiral. She’d become reliable, focused, strong. She pulled her shoulders back and faced Sam as calmly as she could.

  “Thank you for your honesty. It’s probably one of the few truths you’ve delivered to me the whole time you’ve been here. Now, if you’ll excuse Riley and me, we’re going to my private quarters to eat our breakfast. Please pull the front door closed behind you on your way out.

  She leaned across the table and deftly unclipped Riley from his rocker. Holding him to her, she gathered his breakfast cereal and went through to her sitting room, closing the door behind her and locking it for good measure. She waited on the other side of the door, listening for Sam’s movement. He must have stood there on the other side for some time but eventually she heard his uneven gait as he left the room. It was a small victory, but right now she’d take whatever she could get.

  * * *

  It was later in the morning that Sasha came around, to share a coffee and to check up on Riley. She was thrilled to see him feeling so much better so quickly. She was less so about Erin’s news about Sam.

  “He’s Riley’s father?” Sasha’s eyebrows almost shot into her hairline.

  “So he says. I won’t accept it until I have proof, though. Legal proof.”

  “I wouldn’t either. Except…”

  “Except what?” Erin demanded,
her nerves frayed.

  “Except I kept thinking there was something familiar about Sam Thornton from the first time I met him. It was his similarities to Riley. They really do look alike.”

  Erin sighed and felt her entire body sag. So Sasha had noticed it, too. She really didn’t stand a chance and said as much to her friend.

  “Don’t be silly. You’re still Riley’s mother.”

  “But he’s going to go for full custody and, Sash, I’m frightened he’ll get it. I…I’ve done things in my past that I’m deeply ashamed of. He knows all of it and he’s not above using it to prove he is a far more worthy parent. With his money he can afford the best lawyers, the best advice, the best of everything. I can’t.”

  Sasha reached across the table and gripped Erin’s hand tight. “Don’t borrow trouble. Let’s wait and see what he comes up with first. If need be Tony and I can loan you money to fight this.”

  Tears pooled in Erin’s eyes as she squeezed Sasha’s hand right back. Words failed her in the face of her friend’s staunch support.

  “And we’ll be character witnesses, too. We were James’s friends for years, we’ve known you from the moment you arrived here. We know you, Erin. We know the person you are now and the amazing mother you’ve become. It’s got to count for something, right?”

  She could only hope.

  The day stretched out before her once Sasha left. Erin remembered she needed to clean up the boat and get it ready before the dry stack guys came to collect it later in the week. Had it really only been a day since she and Sam had motored out of the cove? Memories of that day were some of the best of her life—and some of the worst.

  She bundled Riley up in warm clothes and put him in his stroller, throwing her supplies in a large shopping bag. Sam must have affixed the gangway from the boat to the dock yesterday before disembarking. If she wasn’t still so furious with him she’d have mentally thanked him for the consideration. She pushed Riley’s stroller onto the boat without any difficulty and tucked him in a sunny corner out of the wind, where he promptly dozed off.

  Local birds had made short work of the leftovers on the table, leaving their own very personal form of thanks on the crockery. Erin mechanically went through the motions of tidying everything up and bagging what needed to go into the trash before scrubbing the tabletop down with disinfectant and hot water. Once the exterior was spick-and-span, she knew she couldn’t avoid going into the cabin.

  “Time to put my big girl panties on, Riley,” she said to her slumbering child as she went down the steps.

  The bed was exactly as they’d left it, sheets a-tumble, covers strewn to the floor. A sharp spear of pain lanced through her as she reached forward to rip the sheets from the bed. Yesterday had held so much promise. So much hope. So much love. And now it was nothing but a tangled memory. She roughly bundled the sheets into a ball, shoving them into a laundry bag and breathing through her mouth so she wouldn’t catch so much as a whiff of Sam’s cologne.

  She also packed up the coverlet and the pillows. They could all do with dry cleaning before getting put into storage for next season. She shook her head. Why was she even worrying about next season? There was no point. She would be leaving Connell Lodge soon.

  She wondered if she had an out somehow. If there wasn’t some legal loophole she could utilize. Erin reminded herself to contact Janet Morin and ask her if she could study the terms of her right to reside at the lodge, not to mention the latest situation with Sam.

  Back at the house, Riley transferred easily from his stroller and into his bed. The antibiotics seemed to make him sleepier than normal, she thought, but that in itself was a relief. She knew sleep was a great healer and she could already see a major improvement in his well-being. It was selfish of her to wish he was more wakeful just so she’d have some company and wouldn’t have to be alone with the thoughts tumbling after one another in her mind.

  She decided she’d go up to Sam’s room and quickly clean out the last remnants of his occupancy, then she’d give Janet a call. Flinging open the bedroom window to air the room out, she methodically stripped the bed and removed the towels and robe from the bathroom. Then she cleaned until she thought her hands would bleed from the effort. Finally satisfied she’d scoured away every last remnant of Sam’s stay at Connell Lodge, Erin closed the window and went back downstairs.

  There was no avoiding it any longer. She needed to talk to Janet. She half smiled. Her habit of avoidance was getting to be a little too much of a regular occurrence. Luckily, Janet was free when Erin phoned.

  “I’m glad you called,” the lawyer said. “I was going to get in touch with you today.”

  “The news about Sam Thornton being Party A?” Erin replied. “I already know.”

  “No, not that. Really? Your guest is Riley’s father?” Janet’s shock was clear through the line.

  “Apparently. I believe his lawyers will be sending proof sometime today.”

  “Wow, how do you feel about that?”

  “Threatened.”

  She dragged in a deep breath and explained the situation, ending with what Sam had accused her of in regard to lying to stay in the house.

  “So, is there any way we can challenge the terms of the trust?” she finished.

  “That’s a tough question. I’ll do what I can to find out. I have a colleague with another firm who’d probably love to get his hands on this. He’s a bit of an expert.”

  “Expensive?”

  “He owes me a favor, don’t worry about fees.”

  Erin heaved a small sigh of relief then remembered that Janet had wanted to talk to her, too. “What was it you wanted to call me about?”

  “Let’s see, ah, yes, here it is. It seems there was some anomaly with your DNA test. They want you to test again. They’ve sent the requirements here to my office. If you can make it in this afternoon, I can get them out on the late courier in the evening.”

  Erin had found it strange that she’d been requested to supply a DNA sample at the same time as Riley’s. Janet had assured her it had to do with providing a complete profile for Riley’s parentage and after that Erin hadn’t given it another thought. She shot a look at the clock. She could make the trip when Riley woke from his nap and said as much to Janet.

  “Good, I’ll look forward to seeing you soon.”

  She hung up from the call, trepidation seeping through her body. The world that had been her rock, her bastion of security, was crumbling around her, piece by painful piece. And as much as she appreciated the support she’d received from friends like Sasha and Janet, she couldn’t help but fear that the damage wasn’t over yet.

  Fourteen

  Sam paced the floor in David Fox’s office.

  “You’re going to wear a hole in the carpet if you keep that up,” David said with a droll smile on his face.

  “For what I’m paying you, you can afford to replace it,” he snapped in return.

  He caught the look on David’s face and felt ashamed. His lawyer wasn’t the reason for his bad temper. This new development was.

  “You know this means you have a stronger case, don’t you? Riley is not only your baby, he’s Laura’s, too.”

  It was beyond belief. Sam closed his eyes as he let the words soak in once more. How could such a mistake have been made?

  “So there’s no doubt? Erin is not Riley’s biological mother?”

  “No doubt at all.” David leaned forward and lifted a sheaf of pa
pers from his desk. “There’s been some further investigation into the leak about the mistake at the clinic. It seems that Mrs. Connell was implanted with the wrong embryo. When you and Laura didn’t arrive for your appointment someone slipped up big-time.”

  Sam threw himself into one of David’s visitor chairs and reached up a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. He couldn’t believe what he’d just heard. It had been enough to know that Riley was his son, but to discover that he was Laura’s as well was a gift he didn’t deserve. But she did, he reminded himself. Laura had wanted nothing more than to be a mother. He could ensure that Riley grew up knowing what a wonderful and special person she was.

  “What a mess,” he muttered, lost for any better description.

  “Seems cut-and-dried to me.”

  “What about Erin? Does she know yet?”

  “We sent the information through her lawyer so I believe she will have been apprised of the situation by now.”

  “She’ll be devastated.”

  “Not your problem,” David said succinctly.

  “Have a heart,” Sam protested. “I know she did her best to block our attempts to find out if I was Riley’s father, but we have to see her side, too.”

  “Why the turnaround? Just ten days you were so angry I thought you were going to ask me to stage an abduction to get Riley out of her evil clutches.”

  Sam rose from the chair and began to pace anew. “I know,” he admitted wryly. “But I’ve had time to cool down. To think. She loves him so much. That’s why she fought so hard to block us. I hate to admit it, but if the situation was reversed I probably would’ve done the same.”

  “Do you want to revise your bid for full custody?” David sounded confused.

  Not his lawyer’s natural state, Sam noted to himself, but nothing about this situation was natural or clear-cut any more.

  “Absolutely not,” he said emphatically. That was the one thing he was certain of. Now even more so. “But perhaps we can offer her visitation. She bore him, after all. She’s nursed him and raised him for nearly six months. I have to show some compassion.”