Becca raised her head. Color returned to her face, but she looked so worn out. After a nod, Hunter led her to the kitchen. He gave Becca a peck on the cheek before he poured the tea in two mugs and handed her one. They moved in sync to the dining room table. Hunter set his mug down and pulled a chair out for Becca. He sat beside her, positioning his body toward her.
"I had a horrible nightmare."
He knew all too well about those. "What happened in it?"
"Everyone I knew surrounded me and kept getting closer, telling me I didn't belong. Even my parents and Ellie were there."
"Oh angel." No wonder she was freaked out tonight. Waking up from that kind of nightmare to a shadow in the yard? She must have been on her way to wake him up when she fell. He'd already heard strange sounds, noticed her gone and came out to investigate. He took her hands in his and held them. "I think when I go back for an appointment, maybe we should get one for you. We're both tormented by demons and I think it'll be beneficial if we face them together, especially since so many of them are tangled together. What do you think?" He hoped she'd agree. Becca was strong, but she was breaking down under the weight of her fears. Watching this happen to her was a sucker punch to the gut for multiple reasons, one major one being this had been him a few short weeks ago.
She removed her hands and signed a "Yes" before picking up her mug to take a sip.
Relief washed over him immediately. Maybe they could even talk to someone together. Obviously Becca had issues she didn't want to talk about, like how she had actually been angry with him. She didn't want to tell him any of this on her own, but if they were going to fully move past it all, it needed to be brought up.
Not that he liked the idea much either, but something had to be done. He wasn't about to lose Becca when his heart had always been hers and he'd finally admitted it. This was a storm he'd fight to the death over. Becca was his world and he wasn't about to go down easily, no matter how much the past scared him.
"I was also thinking," He picked up his own mug. After a few warm sips, he set it down again. "Maybe in a few weeks after we get you all settled, we get the appointment over with and we talk to the private investigator, why don't we get away for a weekend, just you and I? Somewhere cozy and secluded. I feel like we've been surrounded by hell and I want nothing more than to start off our new relationship in the right way."
"What do you have in mind?" He noticed the worry creep back in her eyes, What was it that worried her? Leaving the house again? Being alone with him? It bugged him to no end just how much he questioned everything.
"I just want to feel normal with you, Bec," he said. "I want to feel close. I want to bring back the newness that should have lasted so much more than a few days. I want us back." He needed to know if they stood a real chance any more.
Chapter Eight
"A summer picnic sounds like a blast!" Rissi was all smiles the next morning when Hunter asked them both if they wanted to pick up Sienna and head to the park for a day in the sun. After sitting with him for an hour last night drinking tea and conversing, they both finally headed to bed for a few hours of sleep. Everyone woke up at about nine and prepared to start the day.
Becca wanted to see Sienna. The idea of a park venture appealed to her ... to a point. This time, she shoved aside the negative thoughts in her mind and decided to not be a party pooper. She didn't need to be so darn afraid. Her friend was here for a good visit and Becca would make sure it turned out better than the first night. A park was a public place, and she'd be surrounded by the people she loved most. She had to stop hiding.
"Let's do it." She smiled, even meaning the gesture.
Hunter kissed her cheek. "Bring your camera. Or your easel. Or both! I'm going to call Eva and see if Sienna's available to go with us for a while." He darted off. A few seconds later, she heard him on the phone.
Rissi followed her while Becca picked up her camera bag. "I'm so sorry for scaring the hell out of you last night. I used to move around a lot when I was younger. You remember me telling you?"
"I remember."
"For a few years, I had terrible sleepwalking spells. I mean, they were bad! I'd wake up in the middle of the road with cars swerving. People were telling my parents to lock my door from the outside. It sounds horrible, but it really was for safety." Rissi touched her elbow. "I freaked when I saw how shaken you were. I worry about you, girl. Hunter told me you know I mentioned four years ago. I just- I want to see you two come out of this for the better. You've been in love with the man for years."
"I don't like that side of me being revealed," Becca signed. She averted her gaze, not really sure why. Rissi had seen those sides of her too and here she was, still by her side. Why did it matter if the ones she loved the most saw those parts of her?
"I know. But if anyone knows and understands all of your highs and lows, it's Hunter. Both of you keep skirting around really talking. I mean- really-" Rissi's face flushed.
"I know what you mean, and you don't have to worry because you say talk when I can't."
Her friend bear-hugged her. "Be happy, Becca. I think you being with Hunter is perfect. It's a long road ahead, but I'm on your side."
They both quieted down at the sound of footsteps up the stairs. Becca took Rissi's words to heart. She'd been a little more than upset at her for telling Hunter about four years ago, but she knew they were all worried about her. Unlike her grandparents, Rissi and Hunter cared.
Okay, Hunter. I get how hard this was for you now. Doesn't make it any less frustrating, but I get it.
They both had to fight away the demons. There was a difference in understanding and actually living it.
Hunter appeared in the doorway with a smile. "We can go pick up Sienna." His eyes lit up at the sight of Becca's camera bag slung over her shoulder. "Well, I'll have to take us to a scenic park."
"I'll finish getting ready." Rissi twirled her hair around her finger before leaving the room.
"I'm so glad you're getting out of the house again. I'm always here, Becca. I've made mistakes, but I'm with you every step of the way." Hunter caressed her cheek. His eyes were full of love and worry. "I've got an idea I want to run by you later. I think you'll like it." His smile faded. "At least, I hope you will." He sounded unsure.
"I'm trying. I know you're trying. Sometimes it doesn't seem so, but we've been holding on to so much for so long. I can't deny how scared I am of everything. Our future, us, you, that crazy woman, my own shadow half the time." Becca inhaled sharply, thinking of all the nerves. "I'm afraid to hold on, but I'm also afraid to fall apart."
"I've said this before and it goes without saying. You don't always have to be strong. If you need to fall apart, I'm going to be right here to hold you. If I didn't have you in my world Becca, I don't think I could take it any more. Please don't give up on me, or us."
Her heart hurt at his plea. She didn't want to give up. They had ups and downs. They had nights were she was afraid it was all over, like the one in her apartment, but Hunter still meant everything to her. "I don't want to give up. I don't want you to give up on me. I'm not myself. I wake up every day hoping I can open my mouth to make words come out and it hurts every day when I can't. I don't like talking about the darker sides of me, but I'll try."
Hunter held her close to him. "Angel, I was with you on the brink of death. I didn't give up then, I'm not giving up now. Ever. Do you hear me? Dark side or not, you're the one person I want beside me forever. Voice or no voice, I'm standing beside you one hundred percent. I just don't want you to be afraid of me anymore." He kissed her eyelids before brushing her hair back. She tensed, but didn't flinch. Hunter knew it though. He backed away, pain in his eyes. "Like that."
Becca reached out for him as he started to walk away. Her throat clogged up with emotion. Her hand connected with his and she stopped him. The sad frown on his face made her ache inside. "I'm sorry."
"I'm the one who's sorry. I did this to you. No matter what I do, I don't know how
to fix it," he practically whispered.
*****
On the road to pick up Sienna, Hunter thought about the appointments he promised Becca he'd go to. They couldn't come fast enough. Just when he thought he'd made a breakthrough, something else happened. She flinched at his touch. And okay, she did that with everyone, but he knew damn well he had a huge impact on those actions. She'd opened up a little. She looked a little better and had been excited about the park. Then he had to open up his big mouth.
Back to the drawing board.
It was bad enough when one person in the relationship suffered hell, but both of them?
Minutes later, the three of them stood inside Todd and Beverly's house, exchanging hugs and welcomes.
"Wonderful to meet you, Rissi." Beverly shook her hand. "Any friend of Hunter and Becca's is a friend of ours. I hope you'll visit often. We're glad to have Becca close now."
"This girl knows she can't get rid of me easily." Rissi laughed, nudging Becca.
"I wouldn't want to!" Becca shot back with a smile.
There she went again. Putting on a brave face. Becca wanted everyone to think she was doing well. Hunter knew better, but most others around her wouldn't.
She was way too good at that.
"Daddy! Daddy!" Sienna's happy squeal caught his attention. He crouched down. She flew into his arms, wrapping her sweet little arms around his neck and gave him kisses.
"I missed you tons!" Hunter held her tight. He wondered where Eva was and if she'd even come in to say hi. She'd been decent recently, but she seemed to avoid him if she could. Well, they'd take it a day at a time to become friends, or at least civilized. They weren't fighting, so he'd take it. "Ready for some fun with Becca and Daddy? We even have a new friend to play with. Can you say hi to Becca's friend Rissi?"
"Hi!" Sienna's big smile melted his heart. Oh to be young again without a major care in the world. Sienna's innocence brightened everything. He missed those days. Not that he remembered much of them any more. He set his daughter down and she immediately ran to Becca. Becca's face lit up when she hugged Sienna.
"I love you!" his daughter shouted happily.
Over Sienna's head, Hunter met Becca's eyes. He noticed the sadness reflecting in them. She wanted to tell Sienna she loved her too, but couldn't. Remembering the conversation with Rissi's daughter Jade, Hunter moved closer to them. "Baby girl, Becca's voice hurts, but she loves you too. She just can't say it right now." Sienna hadn't had an easy time understanding why Becca couldn't talk to her any more. She may not even get it now, but he hoped this would help a little.
Sienna stared with wide, curious eyes at him before looking back at Becca. She touched her throat with her index finger. "Owie?" Her voice came out small and scared.
Becca nodded.
"Kiss. Owie better." Sienna leaned forward and gave Becca a big kiss, right on her throat.
Hunter had to admit, he was stunned at the reaction. So was everyone else. From behind him, Beverly sniffled. Becca's eyes glistened with tears. He was on the verge of some, too. His little girl never ceased to amaze him.
Footsteps from nearby caught his attention. Of course, Eva had to walk in on the moment Sienna showed major affection toward Becca. He didn't fail to miss the hurt flash on her face. Hunter prepared for an argument as she marched toward her daughter.
"You have fun with Daddy, okay?" Eva brushed Sienna's hair out of her face, kissed her cheek then spun on her heel and walked away.
No yelling and starting a scene, but he had a feeling he'd hear about it later. Hunter shook his head. Becca had quickly let go of Sienna and the frown she gave him was one of guilt. Not that she had anything to feel guilty about, but he got it. Becca didn't want to overstep and it probably felt worse with the whole thing with her grandparents. He reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze.
"We'll bring her back in a few hours," Hunter promised Beverly.
"You just have a good time. Forget about your troubles for a while." Beverly smiled before she turned to Becca. "I have some ideas to run by you."
Becca's eyes went wide. "Okay. I'm eager to hear them."
Beverly stood before her now and covered her hands. "I'm sorry, hon. I didn't catch that. I'm learning, but it's still hard."
"She's eager to hear them," Hunter said softly.
Becca put on another smile, even though Hunter knew this frustrated her. She removed her hands from Beverly's. "I know you're trying, and I appreciate it so much." Then her gaze flicked to Hunter.
He got the message. She wanted him to interpret. "She knows you're trying and she appreciates it."
Beverly wrapped Becca in a big hug. "Welcome home, Becca. You're with people who love you very much," she whispered before letting her go. Hunter had told Beverly and Todd just a little about what happened in Vermont, and he knew they wanted her to feel wanted here.
"Go?" Sienna tugged on Hunter's shirt.
He noticed Becca wipe her eyes before he focused his attention on Sienna. "We can go now, Princess. We'll stop at the store and pick up something to eat."
"Yay!" Sienna jumped up and down. She reached for Becca's hand, then looked over at Rissi. "Friend?"
Rissi smiled. "I'd like to be your friend."
Back outside, Hunter settled Sienna in her booster seat. Since his car was still hooked to the trailer, they drove Becca's instead.
Rissi walked around the car and climbed in the backseat behind the driver's side.
Before Becca ducked her head to get in, Hunter stopped her. There were no words he could come up with that would make this better. She struggled because of her voice, she struggled with needing answers, and she struggled with her fear. So he said what he meant from the heart. "You're my rainbow at the end of the storm, and we'll get there again." Gently pressing a kiss to her lips, he let her go and made his way to the other side of the car, ready to hit the road.
Half an hour later, they had a basket full of goodies and Hunter pulled into the parking lot of the park. The sun was shining, a gentle breeze made stray leaves dance in the parking lot, and the temperatures weren't ridiculously hot. They weren't the only one with this idea. The park was full of families playing.
Sienna reached for the basket. "I wanna hold!"
Hunter helped her get a good grasp on it before fully letting go. It wasn't too heavy and she walked a little slower, but Sienna laughed with excitement. He reached for Becca's hand, twining his fingers with hers. Awareness shot through him and he knew he couldn't be without her. Ever.
He found a perfect spot, a shaded area with a nice stone picnic table, and directed everyone toward it. There was a playground nearby and Sienna must have noticed the swings because she turned around and handed the basket to him. Then she pulled on Rissi's hand. "Let's swing!" Rissi was another person Sienna found easy to like as she went to her with little hesitation. Either that, or she was finally coming out of her shell. Either way, he liked it.
"I'd love to take you to swing if it's okay with your daddy." Rissi flicked her gaze to Hunter.
He smiled. "If she's that anxious for a new friend to swing with her, I'm not going to object."
"Ready?" Rissi asked Sienna. Hand in hand, they skipped toward the swings.
Hunter pulled Becca closer to him as they walked the last few yards to the picnic table he'd spotted. Setting the basket down, he lowered himself to sit on the bench facing the swings. Sienna ran to an empty one and settled on it while Rissi moved behind her to push. Their happy faces relieved him.
Becca sat beside him and put her camera bag between her feet. She stared off at the swings for a bit before Hunter leaned over to kiss her cheek.
"Want me to push you on a swing?" he half teased.
Her cheeks flushed. "No. There's too many kids wanting the swings. I'm not going to hog them up."
"Okay." Disappointment sagged in his shoulders, but he got it. Again with the lack of conversation. This was so unlike them before Carrie. Damn that woman. Damn her and the agend
a she had that still scared the hell out of him and Becca. "Hey, Bec? Will you tell me about four years ago? And why you were afraid you'd lose me again if you said how angry you were at me?" He didn't want to ignore it any more.
She narrowed her eyes. "Do we have to do this here?"
Hunter suppressed a sigh. She had a point. "Fair enough. This isn't the best time or place. I just wish we could get everything out in the open. Everything." He emphasized the last word.
"I know, but we should do that in a private setting."
While he knew that, he was afraid she'd find a way to evade the conversation again. What was going on in that mind of hers?
A blond haired little boy with freckles on his nose wandered up to them. Blue eyes full of curiosity stared at them. Hunter pegged him as just a year or two older than Sienna. "What is she doing with her hands?" He pointed at Becca.
"She's using sign language to talk," Hunter informed him, using a gentle tone. He stole a quick glance at Becca. Her cheeks were dotted pink as she blinked.
"Why?" the kid inquired.
"Well, sometimes, when her voice doesn't work, she has to talk to me that way."
"But that's not talking! How does it work?" The kid ambled closer, touching Becca's hand. "Why does your voice not work? Is it broken?"
Was this what Becca endured day after day when she was a child and had been mute for years? He understood a child's curiosity, but it had to be tiring.
"It's not that easy, buddy," Hunter said to the boy. Oh, if only it were.
"Jason! Come on, time to go," a female's voice called. The little boy jumped away from Becca, looking at them one more time before running off.
Becca turned away from him again. He'd guess she was watching Sienna and Rissi still having a blast on the swings.
Hunter caressed her shoulder. "Hey, look at me."
She did.
"What are you thinking right now?"
Her tongue darted out, touching her lips before it disappeared back in her mouth. "I'm constantly being reminded of some of the hardest years of my life."
A Masterpiece Unraveled (The Masterpiece Trilogy Book 2) Page 8