by K. L. Denman
But if I wear the hat again, people will probably point and whisper stuff like, “Do you know why she’s wearing that? It’s cuz she’s hiding a cluster of volcanic zits.” And at that point, it would be fun to whip off the hat and be all cool. The rumor spreaders would look like idiots, wouldn’t they? It would serve them right. Yes, I’ll definitely wear the hat.
All at once, I’m super tired. Small wonder, considering the day I’ve had. I’m so tired, I can’t even bring myself to log in to Facebook. It’s all I can do to brush my teeth before I crash into bed.
chapter eleven
It’s like magick! No, it’s not like magick, it is magick. I am zit free! No matter which way I tilt my head, I can’t see anything marring my perfect forehead.
I get dressed as fast as I can. I can’t wait to get to school. Because if I’m zitless, then that must mean the revenge spell worked. And I get to watch Rachel’s world fall apart. Yes!
No.
Huh?
I try that thought again. I get to watch Rachel suffer the way she made me suffer. Eeeuw. What the heck? I should be happy about getting what I want, shouldn’t I? That’s how it’s supposed to work. I wonder if the zits have reversed and poisoned my brain? And then I get another thought, a brand new one. And it’s one I should have had a lot sooner.
I’m going to feel the pain of others.
Omigod. What have I done? This is so not good. I grab my purse, slap the purple hat on my head and bolt out the front door. I go next door, stand on the lawn and yell, “Stellaaaaa! I need to talk to you!”
And Stella comes out of her house. She’s wearing neon pink pants with a lemon yellow top and bright red shoes. To top it off, she’s wearing the hat her baba wore yesterday, the one with bunches of plants sticking out everywhere. I’m so stunned that I forget what I was going to say.
“Hi, Lizzie,” Stella says. “What’s wrong?”
“Um,” I say. What if I tell her that she’s totally destroyed my life and I hate her? I can’t do it. Her feelings would be hurt. So I say, “My zits are gone.”
She grins. “Good for you, Lizzie. You did it!”
We start walking toward the school, and I wonder what people will think seeing us together, but I can’t tell Stella to pretend she doesn’t know me, can I?
So I try to tell her my problem. “Stella, there’s a glitch in the revenge spell. It’s like this. I don’t want to see Rachel get hurt. I mean I do, that was the whole point, but now I feel sorry for her.”
Stella gives me a sideways look. “Uh-oh. We, uh, didn’t think about that, did we?”
“I know I didn’t!” I say. “I was sure I couldn’t give her something good that I didn’t already have. I mean, I think I’ve always cared about other people. I’m sure I did. But this isn’t like that. And it’s really scary because I got a triple whammy, right? Now I can’t even think about other people getting hurt. It makes my stomach feel icky.”
“Really?” Stella asks.
“Really. So we’re going to have to get your baba to fix this too, okay?”
Stella frowns. “I don’t know if she’ll fix this one.”
“Why not?” I ask.
“Because...”
Before Stella can finish what she was saying, a kid on a bike zooms past and grabs her hat.
Stella yells, “Hey!” But the kid just laughs. And then he throws her hat onto the street. A car drives right over it.
Stella’s face crumples. “That was Baba’s favorite hat!”
Tears well up in my eyes, and I put my arm around her. “You poor dear.”
I can’t believe I said that, but I did. And then I say, “Here. You take the purple one.” So much for doing my hat trick later. Doesn’t matter. For some reason, it’s lost its appeal. Stella says, “Thanks, Lizzie. But you keep it. It looks really cute on you.”
I can’t tell her that’s not comforting. I mean, considering she said her baba was cute and her taste in clothes...Oh, so what if she wears goofy clothes? Doesn’t hurt anybody, does it?
I feel like I’ve entered an alternate universe. My mind is warped. I don’t understand half the things I’m thinking. Okay, I do understand them, but they’re not me.
It gets worse.
We arrive at school, and out of habit I go by way of the covered area. All my friends are there again. They take one look at me and Stella and crack up. They don’t even have the decency to hide their laughter. Poor things. They’re only doing it because it makes them feel superior. I know.
I stop and say, “Hi. How’s it going?”
Their laughter cuts out and they start looking at each other. They’re searching for clues on how to react. I wasn’t supposed to stop. I was supposed to ignore them and pretend I wasn’t hurt by their laughter. Key word, pretend. Talk about stupid games.
Finally, Haley says, “Some hat, Lizzie. Any special reason you’re wearing it?”
I glance at Stella and grin. “Stella says it looks cute on me.” All right! I can still have fun!
“That’s not what I heard,” Haley says. She smirks at the other girls and they smirk back.
“Really? Hmmm. Maybe we shouldn’t believe everything we hear.” I take off the hat and say, “Then again, sometimes people are telling the truth. And even their friends don’t believe them.”
Their seeking eyes don’t bother me. I know they’re trying to work it out, the rumored zits and the lack of evidence. Nothing is adding up for them.
“Lizzie,” one of the girls says, “do you happen to know where I can get something for my, um, skin?” Poor thing. She’s prone to breaking out.
“Actually,” I say, “I don’t. But I’ll check on that for you.”
She smiles. “Really? You’d do that for me, after...?” She stops.
“No problem,” I say. “Catch you later. Come on, Stella. We don’t want to be late. It upsets the teachers.”
Stella and I meet up again at lunchtime and she says, “It’s kind of strange. I’ve noticed about five other girls are wearing hats today.”
I grin at her. “That’s because they saw me wearing a hat yesterday. Lizzie Lane is a trendsetter—the one to watch.”
It’s a relief to know that some things haven’t changed. We decide to go searching for Rachel. We find her in the same washroom Stella saw her in yesterday. She’s gathered with her little group, and they’re all looking bored.
At least, they look bored until Stella and I walk in. Then their eyes gleam and they turn eagerly to Rachel.
Rachel says, “Oh. Hi, Lizzie. And whoever you are.”
“This is Stella,” I say.
“Hi, Stella,” Rachel says. “Nice to meet you.”
The other girls’ heads swivel back and forth. They’re waiting for Rachel to skewer me or go after Stella’s clothes. There’s an easy mark. But Rachel disappoints them. In fact, she can barely look at me. The silence in the room is thick.
I can’t stand it. I decide to help her out. “So, Rachel. No hard feelings, eh?”
Her eyes widen and she slaps a hand over her mouth.
“No, seriously. I mean it.” And I do mean it, so I add, “Don’t worry about it, okay? We’re even. I’m fine.”
She bursts into tears and throws her arms around me. “I’m so sorry, Lizzie! I can’t imagine how horrible it must have been for you. So humiliating! And now, room 101? Waahhh.”
I feel awful, but I manage to pat her back. “It’s okay. Although room 101 really is horrible. It’s like death in there.”
Rachel emits another sob, and I cringe. Jeez, what’s up with that? I can’t even rub it in about how much I’m suffering? Sick. I sigh and say, “But I only have to go there four more times.”
“Still,” Rachel sniffles, “I had to go there once. And the teacher in charge is such a turd...” She flinches. “I mean, the poor old guy. I guess he’s been stuck down there forever.”
I get a little teary-eyed myself over Mr. Mean. Ouch! Okay, so it’s really Mr. Snead. I knew
that. “For sure, it must be awful for him being there every day. The smell down there is so disgusting.”
“Maybe,” Rachel says, “we should get him a fan.”
“Yeah! Or some flowers or incense or something.” I look at Stella. “You know where to get incense, right?”
Stella grins. “For sure. I might even have some in my backpack.” She starts digging around and comes up with a little cone-shaped lump.
“Um,” one of the watchers says, “I think we’re gonna go now.”
“Yeah,” says another. “This is, like, really weird.”
Rachel looks like I feel. Stricken. Together we say, “Sorry!”
“Really,” I add, “we didn’t mean to bother you. Are you going to be all right?”
They stare at me. Slowly, they nod and start backing away. As they escape out the door, I hear one say, “Man! That was so totally freaky!”
I guess it was. Either that or magickal.
chapter twelve
Science class. Kyle. I walk in and look straight at him. He is so hot. But clearly, he’s also shallow. I mean, he gets turned off of Rachel because he hears a rumor about her? And now he can’t even look at me because I had zits?
Or is that because he thinks I’m a cheater? Rachel offered to tell everyone that she gave me the exam key, and I was tempted. But then I thought about how much that could hurt her, and I felt sick. I told her to forget it. I couldn’t handle it. I have to protect myself, right?
Only then she said, “But Lizzie, I’ll feel better if I tell the truth.”
It’s all very confusing. Things were much simpler when we only cared about ourselves. Like Kyle. I look at him again, and I even feel sorry for him. Poor guy, it must be hard trying to keep up that image.
He glances up and catches my eye. I can’t resist. I whip off the purple hat. His eyes widen. His mouth opens. And it doesn’t hurt a bit because it’s not like he’s hurt. He’s just shocked. I can do shock.
And then I remember that he’s going to look like an idiot for telling people about my zits and that might make him squirm. I feel queasy. I turn away and take a few deep breaths. I sit down in my seat, and Mandy plops down beside me.
“What do you think, Lizzie?” she asks.
She’s wearing a pink straw hat, a sweet little number with a curled brim. “Oh, cute!” I say.
“Thanks!” she says. “I got it at the mall like you said.”
Note to self: Do not make the mistake of casting an honesty spell. Things are complicated enough already.
A love spell though...I gaze at Kyle and wonder. But if I did that, and he fell in love with me, I couldn’t take revenge and ditch him. I must think about that. Whew. My brain sure is getting a work-out lately.
“Should we do the lab, Lizzie?” Mandy asks.
Man. More brain stuff. “I guess. What do we have to do?”
It turns out to be quite easy. We have to put little bits of metal on the table and pick them up with a magnet. Mr. Sparks comes by and says, “I’m impressed. You girls are working two days in a row? So, what does this experiment tell you?”
“Like attracts like?” I say.
“No,” he says, “there are positive and negative forces. Only opposites attract.”
“Oh,” I say.
“You keep working on it,” he says. And off he goes.
I shake my head. “I think he missed the point.”
“What do you mean?” Mandy asks.
In reply, I pull a plastic tube of lip gloss out of my purse and place it next to the magnet. Nothing happens. “See? It’s only metal that’s attracted to metal.” I don’t tell her that I just figured out the main difference between science and magick. It’s all in how you look at things.
Okay, not everything. No matter how I look at it, Mr. Snead in room 101 is still a grump. He won’t let me light the incense.
“Smelly stuff,” he says. “Likely to set off the smoke alarms. Be seated and remain silent.”
I slump into a seat. I feel deeply sorry for myself. I look around, and the drooling dude is watching me. He’s not drooling anymore; instead he’s giving me the eye. I reward him with a tiny smile and when he smiles back, omigod! He’s gorgeous. His whole face lights up. This must be the light Stella was talking about.
With great stealth, he rises to a crouching position and sort of duck-walks sideways. Toward me. His waddle would look really stupid if it didn’t make perfect sense. Should Mr. Snead happen to glance up, the dude could freeze and it would appear that he was still seated.
He makes it to my table, and I notice that he looks quite mature. Maybe he’s in grade nine? Then he smiles again, and it’s breathtaking. His dark eyes crinkle at the corners, his teeth gleam white and there’s this whole happy effect. It’s as if he’s happy on the inside and it shows on his face.
He grabs a piece of paper and scribbles a note. It says: Hi! I’m Brendan.
I write: Hi, Brendan. I’m Lizzie.
He writes back: I’ve never seen you before. Where did you come from?
He’s never seen me? He must have slept through yesterday’s zit disaster. Wow. He is such a sweetie! I’m trying to think of something cute and witty to write back when in walk Rachel and Mr. Sparks.
“Lizzie Lane?” Mr. Sparks says. “Please come with me.” He mutters something to Mr. Snead and that’s it. I have to leave. I cast one last glance at Brendan, and he gives me a sad wave.
Mr. Sparks takes us as far as the hall and says, “Rachel has confessed to me that she gave you the answer key. Both of us owe you an apology, Lizzie. I’m very sorry I didn’t believe you.” He looks at Rachel.
Rachel looks miserable. I hold up my hand. “She already apologized. Please don’t make her do it again. And please don’t punish her. I think she’s suffered enough already.”
Mr. Sparks shakes his head. “You girls are well on your way to becoming young women.” Then he sighs and mutters, “Which is probably why I don’t understand what just happened here. You may go.”
“Um, do I have to?” I ask. “Can’t I go back in room 101?”
Mr. Sparks’ brow creases with worry. “Lizzie, the past couple of days must have been very hard on you. I’m going to say no to that. I think it would be best if you went home to rest. And don’t worry, we’ll contact your parents again, and you’ll get another chance to write the exam. Off you go now.”
It seems I have no choice. Rachel and I trudge away, and it turns out we don’t have much to say to each other. I think we need some distance after the complete weirdness of everything. The only person I really want to see is Stella.
On the way to Stella’s house, I try to decide if it’s possible to forget that Brendan drooled. I mean, he’s really cute, but now that we’re apart, I find myself picturing that detail. Not pretty. No, it could never work between us. Mr. Sparks was right. The past couple of days have been hard on me. All of my standards are messed up.
I get to Stella’s and knock on the door. The baba answers. “Ah, Lizzie. Come in. Stella is in the kitchen with Angela.”
Sure enough, they’re having tea and cake at the table and ask me to join them. It’s fine, right up until Angela says, “I see through your clothes.”
“Why,” I ask, “does she say that?”
Stella says, “It’s her mantra. Baba taught her to say it. Only she’s supposed to say cloak, not clothes.”
“Oh,” I say. Talk about lame.
“Do you know why I taught her?” the baba asks. “I’ll tell you. It’s a reminder to me that no matter what is seen on the surface, I must also be aware of the unseen.”
“You mean, like, ghosts?” I ask.
She shrugs. “More like spirits. The higher self. The true self.”
“Right,” I say. “I’ve been thinking about that. Sort of. I’m thinking I’d like you to undo my revenge spell.”
The baba looks at Stella, then back at me. “Do you really wish for this?”
“I don’t like feeli
ng the pain of others,” I say. “It upsets me.”
“None of us like it,” Stella says.
“It is almost impossible to undo a revenge spell,” says the baba. “I may make things worse for you. The question you must consider is, does it serve the higher purpose?”
“I’ll get back to you on that.” I fiddle with my tea cup and say, “But that’s enough about me. What I want to know is how did Stella know about me? That I had this hidden talent?”
Stella smiles. “Like I said, my gift is finding the gift in others. Even though you’d only used the talent to predict trends, I sensed the power in you.” She looks sideways at her baba then asks, “So, Lizzie, do you know anyone who suffers from being self-centered?”
I roll my eyes. “Practically everyone I know has that problem.”
“Really?” She shakes her head. “Do you think that might hurt them?”
I consider this. “Yes. Yes, I think it would hurt them. I mean, it might make it hard for them to have friends. And I’ll bet it’s super hard for them to get a boyfriend.”
“So,” Stella says, “when you think about how these people have such a hard time, does it hurt you?”
I stare at her. I think about it. A little tear forms in my eye and I sniffle. “It must be awful for them.”
Stella and her baba nod.
“I know what we could do,” I say. “I mean, before this whole empathy thing kills me. We could cast a spell to, you know, fix them. Then they wouldn’t bother me anymore.”
Stella grins and leans forward. “Great idea, Lizzie. I know the perfect spell.”
“Cool,” I say. “Let’s do it.”
Acknowledgments:
My gratitude also to Kendra Anderson for reading an early draft and to Melanie Jeffs, Orca Editor, for working her fine magick.
K.L. Denman has written numerous books for kids, including Mirror Image, Rebel’s Tag and The Shade in the Orca Currents series. She lives in Powell River, British Columbia.
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