by Ivy Jordan
“I didn’t think you liked me in that way; we were friends,” I blurted. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I don’t know,” she replied. “I mean, I really don’t know. That’s all I remember. We were at the prom, and you were dancing with Sara, and I was jealous. I could feel the powerful emotion in my gut as if I were standing there at that very moment,” she revealed.
Wow, Maddie Stewart had feelings for me. I had no idea. I wish I’d known.
“I’m starting to remember,” she beamed.
“That’s amazing,” I gasped, gripping her tight in my arms.
It was amazing, and I was truly happy for Maddie, but that feeling of loss lingered in my soul. Once she remembered everything, this would all be over. Knowing that she had feelings for me all those years I’d pined for her didn’t make this any easier.
Chapter Eighteen
Maddie
All these emotions flooded through my veins like a drug I craved more and more. I wanted more triggers, needed more. Isaac had to understand the importance of my visit to Portland by now for sure. I pulled from his arms, staring up at him with pouty eyes and smiled. “So, when we get to Portland, I have a good feeling that my memories will all return,” I boasted.
“Don’t be disappointed if they don’t,” he warned.
I watched his eye twitch and knew there was something bothering him. It couldn’t be that I was remembering again, could it? Was he hiding something from me?
“I wish I had my phone,” I sighed, knowing that any secrets he may have been hiding from me would surely be revealed with it in my possession.
“We’ll get you a new phone this week,” he promised.
“Okay,” I sighed, not willing to argue about the topic any longer. He didn’t understand. It wasn’t that I didn’t have a phone; it was that I didn’t have my phone.
“Shouldn’t my new credit cards be delivered by now?” I asked.
“They probably went to your address in Portland,” he quickly replied.
“Oh,” I smiled, not pleased with the response. Why wouldn’t he have had them sent here? And why wouldn’t he have let me talk to the credit card companies myself?
“Christmas is only a week away. You can get all your mail then,” Isaac smiled.
One week: that wasn’t long, but to me, it felt like an eternity.
“I would like to have lunch with Beth,” I blurted, changing the topic quickly. I was exhausted talking about the trip that seemed to be eons away, and the phone I’d probably never see again.
“Beth? Why?” he asked, his eyebrow lifting high on his forehead as he spoke.
“I like her, and she was so sweet to me today,” I explained.
She was very attentive, and I could feel the empathy oozing from her veins. I was hysterical, and she calmed me down, helped my panic attack subside, and for some strange reason, I felt a connection with her.
“Beth and I don’t have a social relationship; it’s strictly business,” he commented.
“That’s you and Beth; this is me and Beth,” I stood my ground.
“Okay, if you would like to, I’m sure she would love to spend some time with you. She’s asked a million questions about how you’ve been doing,” he caved.
A smile slid across my face. It was nice to think I may be able to make a friend. I still didn’t understand why I didn’t have any in the first place. I didn’t seem to be a reserved or private person, and I certainly didn’t like spending so much time alone.
“I’m sorry I pulled you from your work,” I apologized, realizing that Isaac had said he was working with a high-profile client.
“It’s okay. I wasn’t going to find anything today anyhow,” he smiled, pulling me into his arms.
His chest was so hard, so tight, that it made me feel secure against it. His arms tightened around me, and I could feel his breath on my neck as he moved his lips in to nuzzle me. I giggled. It tickled, but felt good.
“Let’s go to bed,” he whispered in my ear.
I didn’t hesitate to respond with a tight squeeze around his waist. I lifted up to my toes and kissed his warm lips.
His squeeze around me tightened, and soon my feet were no longer on the floor. He pulled me into his arms, lifting me into a cradled position, and carried me to the bedroom.
I stared into his eyes, feeling warmth and honesty flow from them and penetrate my soul. It was no wonder I’d fallen in love with this man. It was no wonder I’d fallen in love with him as just a boy.
Chapter Nineteen
Isaac
I followed Tatiana most of my morning, and part of my afternoon. She wasn’t up to anything shady that I could see, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t. In my line of work, I learned quickly that things are not always what they seemed.
Beth pulled my arm hard, guiding me into my office as I returned from my day of surveillance.
“You can’t let this go on,” she hissed.
Her dark eyes were black as coal, and her red lips stretched so tight they nearly fell from the side of her face.
“What are you talking about?” I asked, even though I knew exactly what she was talking about.
“Her memories are getting stronger,” she warned.
Yeah, tell me something I don’t already know. That was partly why I hadn’t told her yet. I wasn’t ready for this to end, and I couldn’t bear to see her go back to Rob, the man who would only hurt her again and again.
She didn’t have any other close friends because of him so when he hit her again, who would she run to, and where would she go?
“I have the trip planned for Portland after Christmas,” I insisted. “As long as I can break this case for Mr. Gallo before then,” I added.
“Christmas is in three days,” Beth snapped.
And her real birthday in only five. We’d be in Portland on her birthday, probably right when she realized I’d lied to her all this time.
“If there’s no break in the case, I’ll handle it; you can’t push this back any longer,” she demanded.
I agreed and smiled. “I appreciate your concern, but I have it handled,” I convinced.
Beth shook her head and sighed. She obviously didn’t think I had it handled at all. “Maddie said she wanted to have lunch with you soon. She was very appreciative of the way you helped her the other day,” I interjected.
“That’s sweet. I’d like that,” Beth beamed.
“But, you have to promise me you won’t tell her anything,” I ordered.
“You know I wouldn’t do that to you,” she promised. “But, you have to promise me you’ll take her to Portland right after Christmas as planned, no matter what,” she added.
I didn’t want to make that promise. I wanted the excuse, just in case. What if something happened between now and then? Anything could happen. Her memories were becoming stronger and clearer. What if her memories allowed her to remember the love she had for Rob, and not the fear, disgust, or anger? Would all the texts, emails, and phone calls from her call log be enough to stop her from going back to him. I assumed she’d deleted texts and emails between me and her to avoid being busted before she was able to get a ticket and fly out here to me.
“Promise me,” Beth demanded, her lips pursing together.
“I promise,” I caved again.
“Have you found her anything for Christmas yet?” I nodded; I had, and for her birthday as well. Beth’s eyes lit up with excitement, waiting on me to show it to her. “What is it?” she pleaded.
Being a detective, I knew she hated surprises and being left out of anything, just like I did. But, these were two very special gifts. The one for Christmas would offer Maddie a connection to her past she’d been craving, and the one for her birthday would offer a link to her future, should she choose to be with me. I was pleased with my decisions, and I knew she’d love them both. The only problem with her birthday was, we’d be in Portland, and she may not want to speak to me ever again, or accept any gift I had to off
er.
“You’ll have to wait,” I smirked, know it was killing her.
Beth rolled her eyes in frustration as she gave up on pushing for details any further. She knew I was a stubborn man, and she’d never get it out of me. “I’ll take over the Gallo case tonight,” she offered.
“Thank you,” I smiled. I was eager to get home to Maddie and to take her out to a musical. She was in the school theater group in high school and even minored in theatrical drama in college. I knew she’d love it, and it would make an amazing surprise. It could even create more triggers from when we were in school and allow her to feel the emotions that led to her love for me. That was worth sitting through a ridiculously long, hard to understand, and overrated musical.
At home, Maddie was dressed in a long red gown, one she’d chosen when we shopped together earlier in the week. She was stunning, absolutely stunning. I couldn’t wait to take her out and show her off on my arm.
She ran to me as I entered the house, her arms gripping me tightly around the neck as her feet lifted from the ground. The scent of her perfume wafted under my nose, nearly buckling my knees. “Damn, girl,” I roared, squeezing her tightly against my chest. “You look and smell amazing,” I sighed.
I’d dressed in the office, choosing the nice suit I wore to the country club to scout out Gallo’s newest woman, but I was still underdressed to be seen with such a beauty.
Our lips met with an electric attraction that neither of us could deny. She may not have remembered her past, and I knew it still bothered her, but it was obvious she was happy. She was happy with me.
“Are you ready?” I asked, setting her back on her feet and taking her hands in mine. She nodded, her beautiful red lips painted to perfection, and her eye makeup thick and seductive.
The look in her eye and the parting of her lips told me she wanted to say something, but couldn’t, or wouldn’t. I longed to hear those three little words, but I knew it was too much to ask for so soon. She was just starting to become comfortable in her own skin. The doctors were so impressed with her progress, not only with her memories, but her ability to make herself a home in a world she felt so unattached to. She had me to thank, she told the doctor on her last visit. That made me proud and ashamed in the same moment.
The musical started early and would end with just enough time for a drive I’d selected for us to watch the sunset together. I’d taken her there on her first trip to Miami, hoping to have the strength to make my move, but I’d let it pass. This time, I knew things would be different, and I planned to make the best of our possible last moments together. So, when her memories returned, mine would be filled with moments that I would cherish for the rest of my life.
The valet took my keys, and I walked to the passenger side of my truck to let Maddie out with my help. Her hair flowed down her back, her blue eyes sparkled, and the low-cut, silky dress flowed from her body so elegantly that every man that noticed her stared with envy. She was the most beautiful woman there, and she was mine, at least for now.
The musical was tough to follow, but Maddie seemed to be having no trouble. Her eyes filled with tears as the woman sang in Italian, and she laughed with the crowd as if on cue, and gasped in all the right places. I was impressed with her, so fucking impressed. She wasn’t only hot, but smart, sophisticated, and had a smile that could melt a glacier.
My eyes were on Maddie the entire play, not once looking towards the stage. She giggled when she caught me staring at her, her cheeks turned a bright red, and she whispered that I’d miss the best part. Her beside me, happy: that was the best part, and I didn’t plan on missing a thing.
Once the show was over, we stepped out into the lobby where people all raved about the performance. “Maddie,” a voice called out, causing us both to turn in the direction it came from. “Maddie Stewart, oh my God, it’s been years,” the tall, dark-haired man greeted her with an extended hand.
She looked confused as she shook the man’s hand. “Don’t you remember me? Ian Mills,” he blurted.
“I’m sorry,” she said softly.
“From Bradley; we were in the same dramatic arts class,” he trailed, obviously disappointed by her rejection.
“I-I was in an accident recently; everything’s still a bit fuzzy,” she admitted with a forced smile. I could tell she was embarrassed to feel so rude to someone so friendly, someone she obviously should’ve known.
“I’m so sorry,” the man apologized.
“Isaac Lewis, Maddie’s fiancé,” I extended my hand to introduce myself.
“Nice to meet you. I hope things get better,” he smiled, and then rushed back to his wife.
I watched them talking and looking over their shoulders in our direction. Maddie’s eyes began to tear up, her face turned pale, and I knew it was only a matter of seconds before she had a full-blown meltdown. He called her Maddie Stewart, not Maddie Grubbs, and I knew that would be a trigger, one I may not be able to disable.
My arm slid around her waist and guided her out of the lobby. I handed the valet my ticket and waited for what felt like weeks for him to finally deliver my truck. I helped Maddie inside and drove off, headed to the secluded place I’d chosen to watch the sunset. It was the place I was certain would offer us an amazing evening, but now I wasn’t so sure.
“Why did he call me Maddie Stewart?” she whispered loudly as we drove up a winding road.
“He may have just gotten your name mixed with someone else. I’ve done that before,” I chuckled, trying to blow the incident off as a total accident.
“Maybe,” she sighed. “But, I should have remembered him if we were in college together, and especially if we were in the same class, right?” she questioned.
“Not necessarily. Maybe he had a crush on you, and so you stood out to him. If he wasn’t someone you were interested in, or friends with, you might have just forgotten him,” I explained.
She seemed to ponder this, but said nothing. She turned her head away from me and sighed.
“I mean, do you honestly think you’d recognize everyone you went to college with, even just those in your classes?” I questioned with a smile.
“No, I guess not,” she agreed. I could tell by her tone that she believed me, and that maybe, just maybe, she’d let the Maddie Stewart thing go.
If she decided to check on the name, using my computer, she’d find her page; she’d find Rob, her engagement photos, and the truth about her past. She find out I’d lied to her, but she wouldn’t find anything that would tell her why.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
I turned and offered a smirk. “Somewhere we’ve been before.”
Her eyes lit up with excitement. I knew she loved anything that could trigger a memory or an emotion. I was hoping for a good one, and after fuckwad Ian nearly ruined my night, my life, I deserved one.
Chapter Twenty
Maddie
Isaac pulled onto a grassy area that overlooked the city. The view was amazing and familiar. I couldn’t place it yet, but a feeling of happiness rushed over me knowing that this place was somewhere I’d enjoyed before. “The sun’s about to set,” he whispered, leaning in to kiss my cheek.
His hand rested on my thigh; the warmth surged through the silk of my dress and drifted onto my skin. It was still early, but the sun going down made it feel late, secluded, and romantic.
Lights began to flicker as the night of the city came to life. The tall buildings lit up, the bridges, boats, and large neon signs. It was tantalizing.
“Anything triggering a memory?” Isaac examined with curious eyes.
“I feel like I was happy here. The view looks familiar, but the air was warmer, it was hot, and we’d just come from the beach because we were wearing swimsuits,” I remembered.
“Yes, that’s right,” he smiled, letting his hand slide higher on my thigh. “That swimsuit drove me wild, don’t ya know,” he smirked.
The devilish smile on his face made my body tingle and my breas
ts swell against the cool silk gown. “I wanted you to make a move,” I whispered, remembering we were only friends, not lovers. “Why didn’t you?”
Isaac let out a deep growl as his eyes narrowed on my breasts. “You cold?”
“No,” I lied, knowing the night air was a little chilly, but not the reason for my tightened nipples that he was admiring.
I leaned back in the leather seat, my rear suddenly very toasty. I squirmed against the leather. “You getting hot?” Isaac teased. I nodded as he motioned to the seat heat icon he’d turned on. “You want me to turn it off?” he asked.
“No,” I sighed. The sensation of warmth was creating an arousal between my legs that I enjoyed.
“So, you remember you wanted me to make my move, eh?” he growled. “Why didn’t you make a move on me?” he questioned.
“Because I’m the girl,” I blushed.
My pussy was fiery with the heat blasting through the silk dress, causing me to writhe to Isaac’s obvious delight. “I’ll turn it down,” he whispered, leaning up to adjust the setting. His hand slid back up my thigh, this time entering the long slit in my dress and caressing my flesh.
I remembered the feelings I had when I’d been on this hill before, strongly. I wanted Isaac, but something was stopping me from admitting it, but what? Was I scared, intimidated, shy? I wanted to be courageous, to go after what I wanted. Whoever Maddie Grubbs was in the past, if she was the woman who let life pass her by, she wasn’t going to be that woman now. She was going to be adventurous, wild, and what better way to start than by seizing the moment now.
My legs parted, giving Isaac more room to freely fondle my flesh. I reached for my dress, slowly sliding the left shoulder strap past my shoulder and then past my breast. Isaac immediately latched on to my nipple, twisting it with his tongue, tugging it gently until I inhaled deep, and then gasped with delight.
His hand slid higher up my thigh, his fingers so close to my silk panties they grazed them lightly, tickling my swollen flesh beneath. My hand reached for the other strap, lowering it past my right breast.